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Patrick Alexander

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[Jul. 18th, 2008|02:18 pm]
I'm selling a DVD player for $40. Here's an SMS exchange I just had:

Hi is player still available?

The DVD player? Yes it is.

Where are u located?

[I give them my address.]

Will u sell for 20!

I'll sell for 30.

I'm a student. Can't really afford that much and i'll have to travel to u also

Make it 20 then you cheap hippie.

What the fuck?

And then, ten seconds later:

I'll pick it up tomorrow
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The Muffin Man [Jul. 7th, 2008|11:54 pm]


He is pretty upset about those fresh baked muffins.
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Laptop; Sydney; Birthday [Jun. 27th, 2008|11:48 pm]
Took these about a week ago, but I've been too busy to post them. My new laptop:



So light and thin and quiet! It is a very sexy XPS m1330. I can post specs in the comments, if anyone gives a shit. But 'sexy' is what it comes down to. Haven't done any video editing on it yet, but I expect the sexiness to continue.

Also the keyboard is lovely and 'clacky'. It feels good and it sounds good. The touchpad buttons are clacky too.

Hey, what's that on my lap?



Well fuck damn, it's a Cintiq!

I'm still getting used to it, and I will certainly not be abandoning paper entirely, but for some things that I do, this wonderful object is going to save me a lot of time and energy. And it's so much fun just to play with!

I've done the two most recent Eegra comics with the Cintiq:

This one in Photoshop, and

This one in Illustrator (but coloured in Photoshop.)

Not too keen on Illustrator, though I do like those smooth lines. I might give Comic Studio a try. I welcome advice from experienced tablet users!

Also! Kind of important! The new laptop has a built-in webcam (as laptops seem to these days), so I'm making Skype my chat program of choice. I will not be reinstalling Trillian, so if you chat to me using ICQ or MSN, well, you don't any more. Get on Skype and find me there. I figure everyone has Skype these days, and the fewer programs I have cluttering my computer, the better.

Please do add me to your Skype contact lists, because I work from home these days and it would be nice to have some online office buddies. Plus it is so handy for staying in touch with friends.

Sydney

I'm extending my stay in Sydney, just so everyone knows. I've been flat out since I got here, and I'm so tired of being busy and rushed; I've been rushed all year. So I'm staying for another few weeks. I'll still be pretty busy, but I want to hang out with people!

Birthday (mine)

It is on Sunday! I am having last minute birthday drinks, as usual! If you're reading this, you're invited, though I will try to call or message people as well.

Please come to Kelly's on King Street in Newtown at about 7:00. I'm thinking upstairs near the pool tables, probably. Shouldn't be too busy 'cause it's Monday the next day. For the same reason, I don't expect anyone to stay too late (although you're welcome to); just come along and make my birthday happy.

Okay, see you then! Actually I will see many of you tomorrow, at the Kinokuniya zine fair.
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Friday [Jun. 24th, 2008|10:46 pm]
Hey, does anyone know if I'm doing something this Friday night? There's a blank space in my diary but I have a nagging feeling I was supposed to fill it with something.

If it turns out I do have Friday night free, I might turn it into birthday drinks. I was gonna do that on Sunday (my actual birthday) but then I remembered that people have to go to work and stuff on Monday morning.
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How to Eat in Newtown [Jun. 20th, 2008|09:55 pm]
Breakfast at Chocolate Dog on King Street:



At Hot Relish on Enmore Road, the best sausage roll in the world:



(Try the banana bread too. If it's a nice day, eat outside, because if you're lucky, a man selling fresh fruit from Queensland might appear in his truck and give you a free passionfruit bigger than your fist.)

Dinner: Bangers & mash at The Duke on Enmore Road, the best pub -- and the best pub food -- in Sydney:



Fuck yes, a thousand times, to all of this.
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[Jun. 10th, 2008|06:27 pm]
Sunset this afternoon, from my room in Marrickville:

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From Wollongong to Sydney [Jun. 10th, 2008|06:04 pm]
Hello! I am in Sydney. In fact I've been here for a week, but I've been too busy to mention it.

Hi Sydney people, let's hang out!

The majority of my worldly possessions are now in boxes in my brother's attic. For the past couple of years, there were more of them, and they were in boxes in my brother's shed. There was a flood at one point, wetting a bottom corner of one of the book boxes, damaging some volumes and attracting slater bugs.

A couple of my gorgeous Wodehouse volumes had to be thrown out:



And one of Eddie Campbell's Alec books:



There was bug poop everywhere:



When I was in year one, I remember, once, a teacher's report saying, "Patrick has a tendency to 'eat' books." My mother explained that it meant I read books very fast and the teacher was running out of books to give me, which was a relief, because I was worried that I had an unconscious habit of chewing on books as I read them (somehow), that no-one had told me about. It was so confusing.

Anyway -- eating books:



The second volume of Maus sustained some damage too, but not so much that I had to chuck it. It's a pity, though, because I think Maus is only published in the single-volume edition these days, which I dislike because it's printed on shiny paper.

It's all quite sad for a book fiend like me, but at the same time, I got over it almost immediately. I can re-buy this stuff; nothing rare or expensive was damaged. And lately, I am less and less attached to material possessions with each passing day. My whole year so far has been just getting rid of shit -- as much shit as possible. My advice to young, single people who don't have a house: DON'T BUY THINGS. You will want to travel, if you have any sense, and to travel, you will need fewer possessions and more money.

Naturally, all the cheap, flimsy paperbacks were unscathed, because, of course, I packed them at the top of the box, supported by the big, sturdy hardbacks.

Here's something I found while sorting through all these boxes; this, and a can of white spray paint:



Good times.
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[May. 30th, 2008|06:04 pm]
My sleep last night was not peaceful. At one point, I had a nightmare involving a home invader, which ended when I threw a punch at him, and I threw it in real life too, and woke up, having taken a bit of skin off my hand on the bookshelf next to my bed.

I have walled myself in, here in the guest room, with giant boxes of stuff, and I've no room to deal with it all.
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My Horrible Story [May. 26th, 2008|02:27 pm]
[20:32] Panic: On the way to Sydney, sitting across from me on the train, was this guy...
[20:32] Panic: High on something; probably ice...
[20:32] Kinoko: (I don't even know what that is)
[20:33] Panic: And at one point I looked over and he was masturbating.
[20:33] Kinoko: ... Wow.
[20:33] Panic: His pink, slippery sausage all out.
[20:33] Kinoko: That... is a sight.
[20:34] Kinoko: I nearly choked from laughing!
[20:34] Panic: It was a packed carriage but no-one else saw; they were all facing different directions or whatever.
[20:35] Panic: For a second I wasn't sure what to do, but I decided he could not be allowed to continue, so I told him off loudly and clearly, and he exited the train at the next stop.
[20:36] Kinoko: Haha! That is amazing, what did you say?
[20:40] Panic: Ice is apparently the popular thing right now, and it's one of those drugs that makes you horny as well as stupid.

I looked him in the eye and commanded, "Put it away, you fucking pervert!"

And he did so, but he was not remorseful, and he mumbled something like, "What did you say?"

"I said, Put it away, you fucking pervert! And it's a good thing you did!"

And then he mumbled something else and I got back to writing notes.

In retrospect I should have fucking punched him, but it's not the sort of thing you're prepared for.

[20:41] Kinoko: No, I think it's pretty cool you said what you did
[20:41] Kinoko: I'm not sure WHAT I would have done
[20:42] Panic: Well I couldn't have him finishing the job, could I?
[20:42] Kinoko: Certainly not! :)
[20:42] Panic: It's bad enough when people vomit on trains.
[20:45] Panic: When he came on, I thought he might be high, because apart from looking like a fuckwit, he had this stupid grin on his face.

He stretched out on a three-seater, his sneakers on the seat, and he had some sort of newspaper, but rather than reading it, he just grinned stupidly at each page, as he pulled it from the newspaper and it slid onto the floor. Seemed pretty satisfied with himself.
[20:45] Panic: "A job well done!"
[20:45] Panic: Then he just lay there, leaning against the window, grinning at me and whatever.
[20:48] Panic: So I got on with my notes, and after a while I saw movement out the corner of my eye, and I thought, "He must be scratching himself; he can't be..." But I looked over and he was.

Sitting up now, his disgusting willy sticking out of his track pants.
[20:48] Kinoko: >_<
[20:48] Panic: Behind him, a group of happy young asian travellers, oblivious. (I played Mario Kart with them later on.)
[20:49] Kinoko: That's incredible, that none else noticed!
[20:49] Panic: Well they would have heard me tell him off, but if they intuited from that what was going on, why would they look?
[20:50] Kinoko: Yeah, it's just a weird situation to imagin
[20:51] Panic: It was horrible. I could have gone my whole life without seeing another guy masturbating, thank you.
[20:51] Panic: What a worthless piece of shit. I should have broken his nose.

Ah well. Next time.
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[May. 7th, 2008|06:33 pm]
In response to Harvey James Harvey:



I have no idea what I'm doing.

(Also guys I am selling comics, did you know?)
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For History! [Apr. 28th, 2008|12:58 am]
[Current Music |ABBA -- Super Trouper]

Oldvatar:



Newvatar:



You can see the 'full version' of my EXCITING NEW LIVEJOURNAL AVATAR right here, along with other new artworks of a like nature!

I am happy to have improved your day with my amazingness.
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Stamps and Sydney [Apr. 21st, 2008|06:05 pm]
Stamps:

I have been making stamps! Look!



What should I make next? What would make a good stamp, do you think?

Sydney:

I actually don't know yet where I'll be staying in Sydney. Does anyone know anyone who wants a boarder for a month, or can anyone recommend a good guest house?
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CDs, too! [Apr. 20th, 2008|10:36 pm]
Forgot about these! If you want any of them, let me know.

* * *

DDR Max 2 OST
(That's 'Dance Dance Revolution'. This is two CDs -- one with all the new songs; one with a NON-STOP MEGAMIX AW YEAH.)

Eels -- Beautiful Freak

Ben Folds -- Rockin' the Suburbs

Buggles -- The Age of Plastic
(This, if you didn't know, is the album that 'Video Killed the Radio Star' comes from. Yes, there was an album.)

Monty Python -- Live at Drury Lane

Monty Python -- The Album of the Soundtrack of the Trailer of the Film of Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Monty Python Sings

BT -- Movement in Still Life
(This is the version with the bonus disc.)

Crowded House -- The Very Best Of

* * *

HOORAY IT'S MUSIC! On... on physical media! If that sounds appealing to you, please take my CDs! Thank you.
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Selling Books! [Apr. 20th, 2008|08:23 pm]
Hello! I am doing my best to rid myself of superfluous possessions. If you would like any of these books, please make me an offer! And do it quick because I'll put these on eBay in a few days if no-one wants them.

Either leave a comment or email me: panic [GOAT] chickennation [GODOT] com

* * *

MANGAS AND GROPHIC NAVELS

* * *

Asterix volumes 25 through 31, namely:

Asterix and the Great Divide
Asterix and the Black Gold
Asterix and Son
Asterix and the Magic Carpet
Asterix and the Secret Weapon
Asterix and Obelix All at Sea
Asterix and the Actress

(These are all Uderzo-only volumes, made after Goscinny died.)
(Also they are all paperback, and in perfect condition.)

* * *

Marmalade Boy volumes 1 - 4
(English language editions by Tokyopop)

YES MARMALADE BOY, YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT?

* * *

Kodocha volumes 1 and 2
(English language editions by Tokyopop)

* * *

Shadow Star (Narutaru) volumes 1 - 3
(Dark Horse editions, which are really good.)

* * *

Revolutionary Girl Utena (Shoujo Kakumei Utena) volume 1
(Viz edition from before they changed the size; they're smaller now, I believe.)

* * *

Oh My Goddess! Adventures of the Mini-Goddesses

Wwwacky 4-komas, brought to you by Dark Horse.

* * *

Nausicaa (by Hayao Miyazaki), volumes 1 - 6

These are Japanese! Also, the full set is seven volumes, so there's a missing volume. Also also, they were bought second-hand and are in good but not pristine condition. HOWEVER, I have, for some reason, two copies of volume 1, one of which is spanky new.

* * *

How to Draw Manga, volume 1: Compiling Characters

* * *

BOOKS WITH WORDS (NOT MANY THOUGH)

* * *

Politically Correct Bedtime Stories by James Finn Garner
(No dust jacket, O alas!)

* * *

Science Fiction: The Illustrated Encyclopedia by John Clute

A big ol' full-colour hardback; good reading for genre loyalists. Concentrates mostly on literature.

* * *

The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Science Fiction, edited by David Pringle

Kind of like the one above, but concentrates more on film and television. They came out around about the same time -- 1995 and 1996, I think.

* * *

That's all for now, but there may be more, within the next couple of months.
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Mr Blobbypants Does the Weather [Apr. 16th, 2008|02:49 pm]
Here's a silly thing I did years ago (I think just before moving to Sydney), that keeps disappearing and reappearing from time to time.



( Click for happiness! )


Now that I have a proper camera, and I have been reunited with my big block of red plasticine, I might do another one of these. Maybe a review for Eegra!

As well as Mr Blobbypants, and on the topic of videogame reviews, I also came across this and this, just now. I think that was the first and only time I wrote something for Hyper. Apparently I can't do anything without someone getting ANGRY.
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[Apr. 9th, 2008|02:15 am]
I am in Australia. Everything is large. The houses are large. The spaces between the houses are large. The fifty cent pieces are large.

I changed my money at the airport and suddenly Japan was gone from my wallet and I got a bit wistful.

But I had proper sausages for dinner, which was outstanding.
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XKCD [Mar. 21st, 2008|02:14 am]
Some postin' from the webcomics megathread at Something Awful...

* * *


I know better than to get involved in this sort of discussion, but whatever, I'm in the mood right now I guess.

Hentaikid:

Oh god it's like he wants to be successful. That bastard, it makes me sick.


Whatever. What is the point in being successful if it's not you who is successful; if you're not expressing yourself and doing your best to make a positive and worthwhile contribution to the culture. What is the point. Money? You can earn money any old how. When you are in a politically or -- as is the case with Munroe -- culturally influential position, you have a responsibility to improve people's lives; to add something good or interesting or thoughtful or helpful to the world.

XKCD doesn't do that. It feeds on shit, and shits that shit out again, tenfold -- out into the world, condoning, validating and encouraging even more shit.

Nobody wins here! XKCD's readers aren't challenged; their lives aren't enriched; and Munroe himself... Once, he expressed himself with XKCD. It mightn't have been brilliant, but it was at least honest and hopefully therapeutic. But now, it has fans. Fans who embrace and validate the very personality problems that Munroe might have otherwise used the comic to work through. They (and he) have made it too easy to be Randall Munroe. Now, he -- and as a consequence, his comic -- will stay the same, maybe for the rest of his life. And he's too young and stupid for that.

But fuck Munroe; I don't know the guy -- it's his comic that's the problem.

The issue with XKCD -- and all shitty webcomics -- is not whether it's a comic or not. The issue is not whether Munroe is more or less popular than other cartoonists who are more talented and have worked harder for success. The issue is that XKCD is shit. It is shit. And when I look at the culture we inhabit, one thing I can say without doubt or hesitation is that we

DON'T

NEED

MORE

SHIT.

No, I don't have to read XKCD, or Ctrl+Alt+Del, or Questionable Content. But they exist, and they retard the culture, and that affects me. So fuck them. The onus is not upon me to ignore them, the onus is upon them to fuck off and die.

Don't talk to me about success. Success is not something that makes the world worse.

* * *


PresterJohn:

A responsibility to improve people's lives? Come on, dude.

While I can agree that extremely good comics might demonstrably improve readers' lives


Perhaps I should clarify. What I mean is that good art improves people's selves, which in turn improves their lives and the lives of those they interact with -- which is ultimately all of society.

Phylodox:

Yeah, I don't think people get retarded from reading XKCD or eating at McDonald's or watching reality television.


Well they certainly don't get any fucking smarter.

And what if there were no XKCD, no McDonald's, no reality television? What if the people who create things created them intelligently and responsibly; what if the whole culture was enriching, and not just bits of it? Would that perpetuate, do you think? I like to think that it would.

I'm speaking idealistically, of course. But ideals can and should inform pragmatic decisions.
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[Mar. 4th, 2008|12:25 am]
I just got a spam email with the subject line, "Enjoy Your Life with the Patch".

And I pointed both my thumbs at my chest and said, "Baby, I will."
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Itaria-ken [Feb. 20th, 2008|04:34 pm]
It's winter, and in recent weeks Rebecca and I have been complaining that there is no ramen shop within walking or quick riding distance from our apartment. Last night, my students informed me that in fact, there is a very famous ramen shop here in Yahata, whose ramen is rated as the best in Shizuoka-shi. It's called Itaria-ken, and is about a minute away on a bike. I've ridden past it hundreds of times in the year and a half I've lived here.

*sigh*

To make up for lost time, I decided to eat there as often as possible in the month-and-a-bit I have left. Today, for lunch, I had this:



I fear that photo fails to properly convey the size of the thing. It is monstrous, and delicious. Never has ramen felt so much like a full meal. It is a mountain of vegetables, and great, generous chunks of meat, piled upon thick noodles -- wobbly and uneven; clearly made fresh that day. It pained me to be unable to finish the bowl. How these perpetually slim Japanese pack it away like they do, I still can't understand.

* * *


Shawn and Dan B have emailed me their phone numbers; thanks guys!

Everyone else: HEY. COME ON.
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Australia and BEYOOOOOND! [Feb. 17th, 2008|05:02 pm]
[Current Location |Japan, still]
[Current Music |Sexy Synthesizer -- ROCK]

Hello. Goodness me.

I've had so many exciting adventures lately, but I haven't written about them because I want to tell these stories properly, and doing that takes aaaaages, and I'm too busy having adventures. It's a conundrum!

But I've decided it's better to write short, inadequate entries than no entries at all -- right? -- so here's what I'm thinking. I'm thinking I will try to update this LiveJournal at least a couple of times a week, with just a photo and a couple of sentences. Of course I want to post all my photos, and tell long, thorough tales, but clearly this is not possible. I would rather post something than nothing, because I don't want you guys to feel ignored, or that I'm not thinking about you. I want to keep you in the loop. That's the whole point of a LiveJournal, surely.

What do you think of this plan? I want to know what you think, friends and, to a lesser extent, admirers. So please share your thoughts.

* * *


PATRICK WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR THE STUFF.

Okay, so. My visa ran out, and I couldn't get a new one. In early January I flew to Seoul and back (and had adventures), so I'm staying in Japan as a 'tourist' until early April. Then I'll be back in Australia for a little while, because I need to see my friends, catch up on my taxes, eat proper sausages and so on. I spent many weeks, late last year and early this year, wondering what my next step ought to be. Then I had a minor epiphany.

My new and excellent job is a web-based job, which means I can work from wherever in the world I like, provided there's an internet connection. And I want to stay in Japan, but I don't have a visa, meaning I'd have to fly to another country every three months. "What a hassle," I thought. "Could I really live like that?" I couldn't get settled -- I'd have to live out of a suitcase; stay in hostels; avoid acquiring material goods; be unable to make serious commitments; see the world; meet hundreds of beautiful foreign women...

Oh.

Ohhh.

And I realised what a rare and fortunate position I'm in, and how jealous any sane person would be of me! I have to take this opportunity -- it would be daft not to. So, yeah: I'm gonna travel!

Why shouldn't I, you know? I don't need to live in one place. This is my adulthood and I can do what I want with it.

So. In the first week of April, I'm gonna fly back to Australia, to stay for maybe three months. I'll probably stay in Brisbane for a month first, hopefully with Rob and Viv, if that's okay with you, Rob and Viv?

Then I'll go to Sydney for I guess a couple of months. I also need to stay with my brother in Wollongong for a week or two, to sort through my boxes of stuff -- hopefully get rid of some of it, and put the rest in storage.

I'd like to stay in Melbourne at some point too, to see Andrew, and also 'cause I never have!

While in Australia, I'm gonna trade in my laptop for a more truly portable model, and acquire one of those new, travel-friendly 12-inch Cintiqs. Then I will pack a big suitcase -- half with clothes, half with art supplies -- and fly back to Tokyo, and live there for three months, in a hostel. (A private room, though -- I want to meet people but I'm not crazy.)

After that -- who knows! I'd like to stay in Seoul for a while, and October would be the peak of autumn and therefore perfect. Plus I have both a sweetheart who comes from Seoul, and a potential 'host family' of sorts in Seoul, so it might be convenient. Then again, I want to see other parts of Asia too! And I really want to travel Europe! Or I could stay with Hayley in London, if she's still there! Who the fuck knows!

So those are my plans, such as they are.

* * *


Rob and Viv: Please let me know if you're willing to host me for a month. If it's not cool for any reason at all, don't worry about it.

Andrew: Melbourne?

All Australian friends: Please email me your phone numbers, because I almost certainly don't have them anymore!

panic [ANT] chickennation [DONT] com

See you guys really quite soon!
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