...Sea of Tragedy... [entries|friends|calendar] seaoftragedy [ website | ...Chicken Poop In The Porcelain Bowl... ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[Make me cry.] fading away forgotten [20 Mar 2006|08:02am] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | hungry ] oh, the promises of forgotten yesterdays. take our book down from the shelf, and dust it off. the cobwebs still seem to stick... like a warning not to dig too deep... not to brood on the past... but still, to not forget. buried, almost in soil, my earliest days... they sink. they lay. they are quiet. so quiet. but still, they nag me. they grab me and hold me. they hypnotize me. and i close my eyes, and i take a breath, and i remember those days far away.

[Make me cry.] anguished [05 Mar 2006|07:17pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | bleak ] thoughts wrap themselves around me. tighter. tighter. it hurts to breathe. i can feel you watching me. you're everywhere. i guess you don't understand your own power. and i guess i underestimated it to begin with. five out of six. five out of six. how the numbers taunt me. and i laugh out loud anyway, because i always get to my goal in the end. so i'll keep reaching for that apple, hunny. sooner or later... it has to fall anyway...

[Make me cry.] from a song i wrote... [14 Jan 2006|09:48pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | melancholy ]

[Make me cry.] hello? [04 Dec 2005|11:12am] anavrinevol i think cyanide_sparkle is the only one who posts here anymore... come on, guys! i know you're all creative... so post something!! anything!! we need to keep this community going!

[Make me cry.] sometimes... [04 Dec 2005|11:04am] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | depressed ] can't we just float like the clouds? can't we just shine like the stars? can't we just believe in our hearts? can't we just trust in the simple things? can't we just be who we want to be? sometimes i wonder what it would be like to be her to be him to be anyone but myself. can't we just love without fear? can't we just dream without set-backs? can't we just rise like the sun? can't we just enjoy what we have? can't we just smile and be okay? sometimes i hurt so much that i cry for hours and hours until i am just hollow.

[Make me cry.] summerwinter lies [27 Nov 2005|12:24am] cyanide_sparkle check your lies at the door i don't need them to breathe and like pandora to the box you open back up the memories there's another there's another one of you you take my heart in your hand and squeeze it like it's nothing then throw it to the dogs this pity game this misery it's nothing compared to this fucking lump stuck in my throat i'm about to burst i'm about to explode into so many pieces that it would be useless to even care [why does it have to be me who you trust? why can't you speak this sludge to someone who fucking cares? why can't you just leave me out of it?] the end is only how far away you percieve it the end is only how near to you that you can feel it the end is always looming the end is always waiting in the distance, in the sunset i don't need your narcissism i don't need your grenn eyed vision fuck the matter! fuck the system! you are NOT my new religion fuck this game fuck this work fuck this love fuck this order fuck this life the end.

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] ***ATTENTION ALL MUSICIANS!!!*** [13 Oct 2005|11:56am] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | angry ] If you get mail from anyone asking you to be part of the Emergenza festival, do NOT bother replying. This is a festival that spans from Europe, to Canada, to the U.S., and it is a giant SCAM. Much like Poetry.com. They set it up to be a Battle of the Bands type deal. They ask you to pay a one time fee of $70 to play for the first show. This may sound like a good deal if you expect to win the first round... But winning is dependant on how many tickets you sell. They tell you it's an audience based vote... But if the bands themselves are selling the tickets... Just think about it. The only people that will vote for you will be the people you sold tickets to. IT'S A BIG UGLY SCAM! And the trick is that they only ask unsigned bands to play. They tell you that there will be representitives from Sony Records... At least 4 at every show. Guess how many are really there. That's right... NONE. If they asked signed bands to play, their managers wouldn't let them because they'd see right through the scam. It's ridiculous. Please, if you're a musician, re-post this everywhere you can!

[Make me cry.] death in limbo [02 Oct 2005|10:10pm] cyanide_sparkle When I pull this thorn out of my side Will you be there to stop the bleeding? When I walk away from this mess Will you be there to start the cleaning? Where will this turn take us? Where will this bend break us? When will we realize When will we realize We’ve been dead for a season? We’ve been killed for no reason? Fuck the air, who needs to breath? Stop the feeding, who needs to breed? Share the knife, We’ll die together. Two of a kind, Corpses of a feather. Shed your skin and fly, Out of body, out of mind. Seriously consider the thought Of making a trip to the end of the world. Seriously consider the thought Of making a trip to the end of the world.

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] Deathwinds and Deathwaves [01 Sep 2005|03:57pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | sad ] You blink your eyes, Trying to believe, It's all forged imagery. Houses drown in the toxic water, And we carve our names, On floating Mausoleums. These deathwinds, and deathwaves, Make waste of what was Once whole and beautiful. Oh, Katrina, Look what you've done. Looters with guns, Steal from the helpless. The homeless wade through the madness, With ghosts in their eyes. Somewhere, at the top of a building, A lonely infant cries. Somewhere, Hanging onto a tree, A man cries for salvation. The water's caving in. The water's caving in. Oh, Katrina, Look what you've done.

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] PLEASE HELP! [27 Aug 2005|12:26am] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | aggravated ] New England's largest underground music festival, the New England Punk Goth & Metal Fest (NE PGM FEST), is under persecution by political forces at Lowell City Hall. For the scene, and for their integrity, the promoters will not back down - this Festival WILL happen, come h*ll or high water. What can you do to help? First off, we have a petition going: http://www.PetitionOnline.com/pgmf2005/petition.html Alternative Music Festival Promoters Forced to Fight City Hall The first annual New England Punk, Goth, and Metal Festival is now in danger of being relocated from its originally-contracted site, Lowell’s LeLecheur Park, due to opposition from the City Manager’s office. In what was a sudden turn of events, the Festival’s promoters received a call on August 15th with information that the NEPGM Music Festival, slated for October 1 & 2 and probably one of the most talked about regional all-ages events in recent years, was suddenly at the risk of being displaced from its chosen venue. This will in effect inconvenience the 5,000 fans and the 70+ bands under contract with the promoters of the event. It has also impacted the local shops and vendors who were looking forward with anticipation to this Festival because of the major financial impact this will have on the regional economy. The city of Lowell is apparently refusing to allow the fest to occur at The LeLacheur Park, citing the possibility that it might attract “a different sort of demographic”. Promoters Mar and Marchesi, who have contracted with 70+ local bands and 4 national headlining acts, have vowed to continue to forge ahead with the plans concocted for this event that were formulated over 8 months ago. For More information on the breaking story please contact Anderson@nepgmfest.com Our official website: http://www.nepgmfest.com Please help out your local music scene! We really need you guys!! ALL OF YOU!

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] sometimes... i'm a painting. [12 Aug 2005|09:18pm] cyanide_sparkle

[Make me cry.] Unstoppable [09 Aug 2005|09:54pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | calm ] It was one of those nights, The ones that seem to last forever. The sky was full of stars, And empty of clouds. The air was crisp and clean. We shared a dream, A stupid teenage fantasy. We thought for a moment that we were, That we were unstoppable... And I guess we were wrong. It was one of those cool summer nights, Where, if you were young, You could lay out on the grass, Stare up at infinity, And feel just as invincible. We shared a dream, A stupid teenage fantasy. We thought for a moment that we were, That we were unstoppable... And I guess we were wrong. It was one of those nights, Where we felt part of forever. We laughed, and it seemed, To echo off the moon beams, And we smiled and sighed at the possibility. We shared a dream, A stupid teenage fantasy. We thought for a moment that we were, That we were unstoppable... And I guess we were wrong. It was one of those cool summer nights, Where, if you let it, You could be sucked in, In your contentment... And the air was crisp and clean. We shared a dream, A stupid teenage fantasy. We thought for a moment that we were, That we were unstoppable... And I guess we were wrong. We shared a dream, A stupid teenage fantasy. We thought for a moment that we were, That we were unstoppable... And I guess we were wrong. i wrote this for my band.

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] a dream within a dream [22 Jul 2005|12:54am] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | sleepy ] the road winds, and i watch the sky. swirling clouds turn sky-blue-pink, in the dwindling light of day. night falls swiftly. the sky fills with an infinite amount of flickering starlight. headlights are brighter now that the surroundings have a blackened edge. now the clouds have dispursed. they've parted ways to make room for the glistening moon. crickets, night time's violinists, play a quiet song, trying to lure the unsuspecting listener, into sleep.

[ Only 1tear for me...| Make me cry.] [15 May 2005|02:57pm] spedcialchild [ music | Cradle and all-Ani Defranco ] i think i'm out of this writer's block. almost, at least. just, JUST wrote this. tell me what you think, but don't be too harsh, please. thanks. She sits next to her in the mirror, She puts on makeup like she does, She walks the way she does, But has eyes like her father. She steals her heels and wears them, Even though they are too big, She gets the same clothes as she does, But they never looked the same. He wakes up the same time in the morning, He plays the same sports, He tries to act just like he does, But has blonde hair like his mother. He eats the same hearty foods, And cuts his steak like he does even though he never cared for the same sauce now and again. She grew up to be just like her, Her eating disorder and all, And her lovely blue eyes Have become pale and glazed. He now had the same muscles as he did, With the same steriod addiction, And his beautiful blonde hair Got shaved off be force. Like mother, like daughter, Like father, like son. -m.

[ Only 7tears for me...| Make me cry.] It's Yours to Name [30 Apr 2005|10:07pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | cold ] Graft my hand, To my mouth. That way, nothing, Will ever come out. Open me up, And look through my insides. Take my heart out, To see if it’s really mine. From the loss of blood, From the loss of thought, I think I’ve lost it. From the loss of hope, I think I’ve lost you, In the process. Unspoken apologies, Written by hand. Can’t say everything, That I want you to understand. If my bones could cry for you, They’d cry with everything they have. They’d mourn the loss, Of everything we never had. From the loss of blood, From the loss of thought, I think I’ve lost it. From the loss of hope, I think I’ve lost you, In the process. I shed my skin to be, Rid of this poison tomb. While I’m decaying inside, Outside the flowers are in bloom. My petals are all gone, You plucked me ‘til I was dry. There’s nothing here to replace them, But the stinging in my eyes. From the loss of blood, From the loss of thought, I think I’ve lost it. From the loss of hope, I think I’ve lost you, In the process. From the loss of blood, From the loss of thought, I think I’ve lost it. From the loss of hope, I think I’ve lost you, In the process. it's a new song i wrote for my band. i wish i could put up the actual music... but my mic died.

[ Only 7tears for me...| Make me cry.] The Dark Path [26 Apr 2005|07:43pm] shadowatk I'm walking this dark path alone, looking at my mobile phone, waiting for someone to call, but they don't.. fucking bastards.. I stare into the moonlight sky, watch my demons flutter by, and if I took the chance to cry, I might just die.. and that just wouldn't do.. I wonder how much more to take, my demons scorn, and my friends hate, I'm afraid to say it's true.. but you've heard it all before.. Who will be there to take my hand as I try to take my stand against the darkness in my heart I just don't know where to start and if I look the other way this pain will never go away it's not a matter of pride I'll see you on the other side And so I step into the light, it lasted for just one more night, before the darkness came along, and swallowed up.. all I have known.. And with hidden line and verse, I start to scream, start to curse, I put the blood upon the wall, I curse you all.. curse you all.. and as the second hand ticks by, I wonder what, I wonder why, but still the voice is there, never doubt.. never go.. Who will be there to take my hand as I try to take my stand against the darkness in my heart I just don't know where to start and if I look the other way this pain will never go away it's not a matter of pride I'll see you on the other side I cower and I plea, "what do you want of me?" but the demons float around, and scream and shout .. the lights go out.. And as the darkness comes again I wonder when the pain will end, but I can not fight alone, I look at the phone..

[ Only 22tears for me...| Make me cry.] some cool pics i took [25 Apr 2005|06:44pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | weird ] ( clicky clicky *wink wink* )

[ Only 5tears for me...| Make me cry.] True Love - A Villanelle [20 Apr 2005|03:08pm] gummifaustus No kind of love is worth feeling like this; I'm not even safe in the land of dreams. What good is having true love with out bliss? Day after long day we grow more amiss; A kiss doesn't mean what it used to mean. No kind of love is worth feeling like this. A shrug shows I am easy to dismiss; Your blatant silence makes me want to scream. What good is having true love with out bliss? Would I be your knight were I to persist, Or would you steal my sword and tear our seam? No kind of love is worth feeling like this. I would laugh at the deadliest abyss, And cross it smiling if I could be redeemed. What good is having true love with out bliss? If we turned and left would we be remiss; Or remembered as well as our first kiss No kind of love is worth feeling like this; What good is having true love with out bliss?

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] new haiku [17 Apr 2005|11:36am] shadowatk A hero's sword, all new and clean, the hero's dead (yeah, I like haiku they're easy and fun.. I've managed to not post any till now, I'm sorry)

[ Only 2tears for me...| Make me cry.] the sky is falling [26 Mar 2005|07:38pm] cyanide_sparkle [ mood | cold ] window shades create empty shadows on the air they dance with every movement of the patient swarm and i'm watching it all on this wide wide screen this screen made of glass, with a wooden frame these double reflections, trick the eye and outside, the sky, is ready to fall and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me. and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me. licensed mourners mourn the come of dawn they all go back to bed when the night has gone when it’s cold outside, and frost is in the air the leaves all wither in the weather that isn’t there and i sit and watch this natural reaction to a natural distraction, and the sky is gonna fall and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me. and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me. how can you be so closed minded? how can you be so fucking blind? how can you sit there watching the world die? how can you let this sky fall down? and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me. and when it falls, it will fall down on me it will fall down only on me.

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