| long needed update and a new site |
[03 Nov 2007|10:35pm] |
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mood |
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 loving |
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well, do I ever have some news!
I'm now living in Hawaii!
Teri, my teacher who was going to take me to CA suggested to her daughter that I could help and be a nanny of sorts for their 2yo son, Luke. so here I am, on the island of Kauai!
I've been here for a little over two weeks now and it's going great, though I do miss home a lot. I especially miss my new bf, Mike who I got together with near the end of July. we had a little bout this week where I was insecure and wondered if I'd be able to handle not having him physically by my side. we broke up, but were both so miserable and after two days declared our love for each other again. He's coming to visit in January. I'm very impatient until then...
I started a new blog describing my adventures here on Kauai and placed it on a website I made. Please feel free to check it out, there's pictures there too.
www.heidibro.com
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| life thinking |
[27 Jul 2007|10:17pm] |
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mood |
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 gloomy |
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I broke up with Trevor again. He's really an awesome guy, I love him a lot, but obviously something was missing for me. So I wasn't as perfectly faithful as I could have been, but that was my signal. If I hadn't have gotten that signal, I wouldn't have gotten out. Does that really give someone the right to say things about my "integrity"? Do people really think I WANTED to hurt him? God, If I could live with not hurting anyone for the rest of my life I'd take it! But I either have to hurt him briefly, or hurt myself long-term. What was I supposed to do?
I wish people would stop telling me what they think I am.
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| how to escape feeling dumb? |
[09 May 2007|08:13pm] |
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mood |
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 nervous |
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So...
The trip to CA fell through.
My teacher Teri who was taking me was going with the purpose of taking her inherited ivory figurines/statues to an auction house out there. But it ended up that the lady at the auction house found a packer that would pack them up professionally and ship them out for way less than it would cost for us to drive out and back. So of course I couldn't be the one to cost her more than necessary....
And I did find out shortly after I posted my last journal that there was a possibility of this happening so I'm not so much disappointed as nervous about telling all everyone that it's not happening. For some reason it just makes me feel dumb.
I'm especially anxious to tell Brian... I feel bad for him because he was all excited that he was going to be able to train me (so he didn't have to be the only cook) and then when I requested the time off he had to put the training off. So now coming back and saying "oops, I take that back, I'm not going" makes me feel like a jerk. If I despise one thing it's not being true to my word. I feel like if I ever tell anyone I'm doing something again they won't take me seriously anymore. I guess too many things like that have happened to me in the past.... I don't usually take any plans seriously until they actually happen anymore. That's how I protect my self from being disappointed for myself.
But ugh. How do I tell Brian??
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| spring! |
[04 May 2007|02:51pm] |
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mood |
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thankful |
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Things have been going extremely well this week.
I asked my aunt last week if she thought there would be any openings at the golf course she works at because I was looking for a job closer to home. She told me to go in and check it out. So I went, and they had me fill out an application. They said they had one opening for a dishwasher in the kitchen and they seemed like very friendly and positive people so I was hopeful.
The same day, just a couple hours later, they called and asked me if I could start the following Tues. So I did, and besides my feet being pretty sore from standing by the end of a 5 hour shift I've enjoyed it quite a bit.
The cook, Brian, is a young guy, very nice. And now besides me being the dishwasher he's going to start training me so eventually I may be able to take over lunches! This is really interesting to me because I've only relatively recently thought that maybe being a cook would be something I'd enjoy. Law of Attraction, people!! so I worked there three days this week and have four scheduled next week. I'm happy.
And then...
Yesterday, my former waldorf teacher, Teri, whom I love dearly, called. She reminded me of the trip to California she had talked about taking me on last fall. She said she wanted to go next week and still wondered if I'd go with her, all expenses paid. I said I'd have to ask my new boss but was concerned about asking for two weeks off so shortly after beginning.
So I asked Brian last night. He said that was fine! I'm on my way to California a week from tomorrow! We will be driving so it will be long and grueling but I was also just recently saying I'd like to visit San Fransisco....
Are you seeing a pattern? I am.
Seriously, however you can, you should get your hands on The Secret. It's a truly inspirational movie.
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[16 Apr 2007|12:14am] |
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mood |
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 annoyed |
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music |
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anything to cover up the tv upstairs |
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I've been here at my sister Annie's apartment in Ann Arbor for a week now. I don't have a ride out for another week at least. Annie does not get out much because she has some balance problems due to a series of possible MS breakouts. Since she doesn't go out, and I don't really know anybody here to go out with, I don't go out. She lives in an apartment complex where I can "steal" wireless signals very easily, and so I'm pretty much online all day. This is not good. I have just about become an internet addict. I did have a little break this weekend when my boyfriend came to visit but now he's gone it's back to my laptop. One particular online interest of mine has been youtube.com... I've even made my own "channel" and have two videos up. Visit me!
I do plan on taking Annie to her class tomorrow though. (She's getting her Phd. here at UofM.) I think I will walk around the city and campus maybe visit a cute little bookshop I've gone to before and hopefully take some pictures. It should be fun, hopefully I'll have something to show for it.
Musical group of the moment: <a href="http://www.myspace.com/carbonleaf ">Carbon Leaf</a>
GOD, the people upstairs have their tv turned ALL the way up, I swear. It is REALLY getting on my nerves...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| It's late |
[18 Feb 2007|03:45am] |
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mood |
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 pensive |
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I don't know why I'm writing this... I'm currently at a girlfriend's 18th (God, we grew up fast) b-day party, it's nearly 4 am, most of the girls are asleep, the rest are watching season 2 of the Office on DVD.
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| quicky update |
[31 Jan 2007|11:20pm] |
It's getting late, and I'm getting tired so this isn't going to be long...
I just came home from a two week trip to Lansing and Ann Arbor. It was pretty fun, I spent a LOT of time with Trevor, a little with my sister and other friends that I don't see often. I also found a homeschool group in Lansing and went to their meetings the two Wednesdays I was there. It was all moms and kids 11ys and under but it was really cool just to be around people who understand the things I do. I did make one friend near my age (hi Marley!) through the group though, thanks to one of the moms there who connected us, and we met and saw the movie The Pursuit of Happyness.
I got so spoiled from the high-speed wireless internet at Trevor's... coming back to dial-up is a drag. Literally. I got into YouTube.com while I was down there and here I can't do anything on that site except look at the titles of the videos people posted. What fun is that?? I'm going to the library tomorrow.
I don't really write here much... i just noticed that you can view exactly a whole year of my posts on one page... wow. In relation to that post of Jan. 31st 2006, here are a couple things that are the same and different--
-I'm still busy somehow... one new happening is I hope to participate in some filming classes provided by the local public access tv channel.
-I still go to the library and help Shirley whenever I'm in town. I hope I know my alphabet a bit better. ;)
-Trevor just bought me the same shirt I lost at the Story of the Year show! Haha, so nice of him... :)
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| beatle-mania and another test |
[02 Jan 2007|11:58pm] |
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We have netflix and I've been watching the Beatles Anthology... they were really a phenomenon. Great music, I love it. I feel weird considering their ages now but they weren't too bad looking either! so in relation in relation to them ( here's a test I took... and another completly random one... )
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| Welcome 2007 |
[02 Jan 2007|11:34pm] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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music |
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DIck Siegel! |
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Let's see.... I'm 18 now, did we cover that? I can't remember, that's old age for ya. ;)
The holidays went ok around here.... We got a huge piling of snow sometime in the middle of November, then it all disappeared and we've had none since. The only non-white christmas I can remember... :( I'm scared for my children's Michiganian childhoods. I remember when I was around 6-10, somewhere around there, we'd go the beach (Lake Michigan) and there would be these "huge" ice-berg-things all along the shore...forming little caves and mountains...a magical playground.
I don't know if it's because I'm 18 now and the "baby of the family" has "grown up", but the celebrating of christmas has kind of slowed down at our house. My brother and I were the only ones that actually gave presents, my mom and sister just gave money. But I'm not complaining, that's what I asked for. I got around $600-700 which is helping buy the laptop I'm getting on THURSDAY!!! YAY!!!!! I'm super excited. So that's pretty much all I got besides a cute little kitty ornament form Trevor (we have a tradition of ornament giving) and some socks I am yet to see from my brother.
New Years Eve was pretty cool. Chloe and Nathan had a small party down at the "shop" (little apartment/room connected to the garage). It was pretty chill; we played some "apples to apples", watched some movies, listened to music, shouted at midnight, all that. Trevor was there, that was good. :) Here's to another awesome year in which I better myself and continue to learn from my mistakes. To water!!
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amiloelover's journal
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