I don't even
want to go there. The past is behind me. The cross is before me. No turning back.
A truth or dare game that shattered my friendship between me and someone I love dearly. I regretted playing afterwards, and not even one truth or dare game had found me since.
The year I was born. It would be 1988, 1990, 1991 or 2000.
Сейчас уже гадать не о чем. Жизнь прожита. Но нужно было валить из этого Гондураса, пока были силы и здоровье.Жизни здесь на Украине нет и в ближайшей перспективе не предвидится.По крайней мере, в этой жизни не жду ничего хорошего.
All of it. My life is full of regret.
В общем - нет. Всё было как должно было быть. Но может, у некоторых, у кого не смог или не захотел тогда, попросил бы прощения, вот это единственное.
I can't say I have many regrets. I have a guilty conscience so when I'm mean to some I always feel guilty for awhile. But the only regret I have comes from high school. I hurt someone I looked up to's feelings. I tried my best but there didn't seem any way around it. I wish there was some way I could have done what I needed to without it happening but I still can't figure out how I could have. My life would be very different if I could have avoided that. But then again, I feel some things do happen for a reason. At that time I learned to stand up for myself, that adults are human too, that I had a bigger impact than I thought I did on some people, and that some people will inflict pain on you even if they have no involvement with your situation (or kick you when you're down). But I guess if it didn't happen it would have taken me longer to see how ugly people can be.
I'd redo today.
This week was spirit week at our school and Thursday happened to be Pirates vs. Ninjas... slash Cowboys. I wore my pirate costume proudly, but was too self conscious to add the hat that completed the look. I went all day without it on, and in turn people didn't recognize that I was even a pirate. I felt crappy that whole rest of the day and resembled more of a hobo.
However, during my last period of the day my teacher had a message for me from a friend who also has her for AP History. "Ruby told me to tell you she says hello, and to wear your hat." I smiled and at the end of class I walked toward her outside the school and put it on merely for her enjoyment. We laughed for a second, but then right after I start having people come up to me wanting pictures and hugs (the free kind). I felt like a Disney character.
I wish I'd have worn it all day, but because of my stupid lack of courage, I'd forgotten how cool it would've been just to dress up, not what people thought. So let's go back about ten hours and do this shit over. xD
Undo all the stupid mistakes. Like the time when I snapped at my whole class and teacher for no reason (and felt so guilty about it...) and when I sent weird messages to people on my Dad's mobile contact list...
Oddly enough, about 3 months ago I was in a real rut of wishing I could go back and do most of my life over. Yeah that's kind of a big thing to want,but i felt if i could start over again at about 6. Why 6? That's where the big trauma happened that shaped most of who I am today. I felt if I could go back to age 6 and have a full knowledge of what i have now, I'd be better equipped to avoid those situations that greatly effected me for the worse. However instead of me befitting from it, maybe the person involved would be changed. I doubt my history would rewrite itself in my head since I could remember.
Plus, I'd be able to predict the future mostly (maybe prevent the possible 9/11 attack?) and maybe make a living off that.... at least until I caught up to where I left off.
However, age 6 would probably also be the worst age to start from with a full knowledge. How would I be able to interact with my old friends and peers my age? Sure I'd have an advantage in school, but I'd be quite bored. I'd be considered a prodigy with my developed talents and I think I'd grow impatient with everyone around me treating me like a kid again.
Maybe if I was able to go back and forth through time, I'd be more satisfied.
But here's a question to think about; Are you really changing your past for your benefit, or for that of the person involved?
I would think it'd be for the benefit of the person involved because if you went back to change something, chances are you are expecting to remember what it is you're trying to change. You'll always remember how it was but the person involved with the situation wouldn't. So maybe you're hoping to change the out come of a fight or take back that foolish choice you made since it hurt someone you care about in the process. You'll always have that knowledge of what had happened when you made the wrong or bad choice, but I'd imagine the other would continue to progress through life on a slightly (or greatly) different path due to the change you made.
Otherwise, if one went back to change a situation, but not remember what it was they were there for, chances are you'd do the same thing again since you had no experience to base you're reason to choose the 'other option' on.