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Pecking Order

Are you an oldest, youngest, middle, or only child? How do you think it has influenced your personality?

Answers (219)

  • I’m the oldest of two kids in my family. Nevertheless, I’m the only one with a disability. This makes me envy my brother in some ways. He doesn’t have a disability whatsoever, and he can drive a car—even has a job and lives on his own. There are times I wish that I didn’t have a disability whatsoever, and I could be just like him. Regardless, my boyfriend and I are in similar situations. Unlike me, he has no siblings, only step siblings. He grew up without anyone to share secrets with. Me, I was abandoned. Though my brother is younger than me by 3 ¼ years, he wanted nothing to do with me growing up, didn’t want to help me whenever I needed it. My personality has been influenced by this, because I feel that I’m more compassionate. Sean and I are always together—doing things like siblings do. If we fight, it’s in a playful way. Ultimately, there’s only comic sides to both of us, unless something is really bothering one or both of us. Even when that happens, we try to help one another out.
  • I'm a middle child (three out of six), but I was the first girl, so I got some of the special attention like a first born might. I think having two older brothers had a lot more influence on me. If I wanted to be with my brothers (I did!), there was no crying, sulking, mamby-pamby allowed! So I lived in overalls, climbed fences, played baseball and was tough. My sister, born next, was the more feminine one, and she and I were not close growing up (despite sharing a room for 18 years!) but became close after we were both married and had kids.



  • Youngest of three.

    "The third born is the idea person. This birth order likes to figure things out, invent things and challenge obstacles."

    Cliff Isaacson The Birth Order
  • Я - старший
  • Im the youngest child and it has definatly influenced my childhood, personal beliefs/values, and the person I am today. Growing up it was just me my mom and my sister. For whatever reason (really I cant figure it out because we were very fortunate) my sister rebeled. Not the normal teenage rebellion like talking back and staying out past curfew. She joined gangs, boosted/racing cars, it seemed like every month it was something new and more dangerous. She's been arrested more times than I can count, I even remember my mom turning her in a couple times. I saw how her behavior broke my moms heart growing up. I could never understand how anyone would want to hurt my sweet, loving, supportive, and caring mother intentionally. For these reasons Ive always been the "good one". I dont drink, do drugs, Ive never skipped school and I always get good grades. I pretty much dont do anything that would break my moms heart like my sister did/does/
  • единственная посему-неповторимая)))
  • One of my friends texted me a while ago and said "I'm so tired of being alone..."

    Too bad she picked the only child to whine to.

    I don't know how to act around people. I come home from school every day and I'm usually the only one home. I'm constantly alone and I'm used to having things that way... so it's hard for me to make friends because it's so weird for me to have all these people around.

    I'm kind of a pushover too. I'll do what other people want to rather than pick what we should do myself. I'll lend out clothes to my friends when I really don't want to. I'll buy food for friends, and I'll pretend I have an opinion that I really don't just to agree with everyone. I don't want to stick out -- I just want to blend in. To belong with someone.

    And in some ways, that's good. I mean, I didn't start high school with my older sibling's reputation in front of me; I got to start something by myself. But at the same time... I don't think I look at relationships the way that other people do. I can't really grasp concrete relationships -- are these really the people that I'll still talk to in ten years? Everything is temporary to me besides my parents. I'm totally prepared for a future alone, without anyone, and that kind of bums me out when I think about it.

  • I'm the oldest of six siblings. Yup I feel old, even though I'm not quite that old. How has being the oldest shaped me today? Well, I've always been expected to go "above and beyond" anything I do. I've been encouraged to never give up on anything I want and to always be aggressively determined in everything. When I wasn't living up to the expectation, well lets just say I always became the least favorite child. Or at least it's always felt that way to me.

    When ever my younger siblings did something against the expectations, I was always the one to blame, because my "wrong" influences have somehow always tainted the young and innocent minds of my siblings.

    So today, well I feel much like the outcast black lamb. most of my siblings are living up to these expectations while I, the oldest and first born, am more or less forgotten when it comes to adoring praise from family. Of course when it comes to chores, money, or even if someone needs to be used for venting frustration, well then I'm remembered. Of course, my younger siblings also get in trouble when they do things wrong.

    So yeah I guess my sense of anger/resentment (whatever one wants to call it), my cloudy outlook on a lot of things can be thanked to be born first. Though I have heard the middle child goes through a lot.
  • I am an only child who had an only child. I think it made both of us far more independant, stubborn and self reliant. From what I have seen of sibling rivalry and downright hatred in my extended family...I am really happy to be an only.
  • I am the middle child and the ONLY girl and i love it because i understand both point of views!!!
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