Dina

Hi.

Mon, 29 Jan 2007 14:45:11 GMT

Do you know what I did?

I did NaNoWriMo. Yes, I know that was in November. (http://www.nanowrimo.org btw)
And I am a 2006 NaNo winner. Yay! But my novel isn't finished. Boo. I need to do that.

And I need to say more in here later. Today I'm just, uhm, working. Nothing really excited. I'm thinking of going to Cambodia this summer. Or Germany. We'll see.

"I'm not dead yet"

Mon, 16 Oct 2006 16:02:09 GMT

Although some may have wondered.
Hello everyone. :)

I, uhm, am still lost in Dekkerland.

And then I was assimilated and joined myspace and xanga. *hangs head in shame* And I've read just bunches of books in the past few months. Well, bunches for me.

The new job is going well. Like the job itself and the people. I'm taking German again this semster. Ugh, I'm such a perfectionist. I still wish I knew it better though. I feel like I get lost easily. And it's always disheartening when I don't understand the assignment!

Other than that, eh, well, that's about it.

I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year. Weeeeeeeeeeee! So I'm trying to get as much German homework done this month before the crazy month of November. I have to write a 50,000 word novel during that one little month. Think I can do it? We'll see!

I went on a nice vacation end of July/beginning of August. Saw my grandpa and several friends in Ohio, New York state and Michigan. I got to record a song in a friend's recording studio too! It was great fun. His wife and I sang a duet. I believe he's going to put it on his next album.

This weekend I'm going up to Omaha to see the fam and some friends. I ended up being there a couple weeks ago too because my grandpa passed away. :( I always cry at funerals. My grandpa was a marine, so he got marine honors at the funeral: marines standing at attention and the 3 gun-shot solute. It was really neat to see him honored like that. He was my mom's dad, and my dad's mom, two sisters, and nephew came out too. That nephew (my cousin) was also in the marines and my grandpa had written to him to encourage him. My grandpa was a great guy. Loved his family, encouraging to young marines, and great sense of humor.

Anyway, that's a quick update on me.

PS - Read Eric Wilson. www.wilsonwriter.com :)

Announcement!

Mon, 15 May 2006 14:08:56 GMT

*taptaptap*

Ahem.
I have an announcement to make (as the suject has already stated).

I GOT A NEW JOB!!!!

*bounce*
Still working for the same university, but for the school of Computer Science and Engineering as a computer systems assistant. Very large pay raise.

I'm excited because it will be much more stimulating and more active! And I'll be able to finish paying off school in about a year. Soooo excited!!

:D

A Recap

Fri, 28 Apr 2006 18:01:12 GMT

Why hello! I'm back! And I'm still alive! Okay, quick recap of the last week or so:

Thur 4/20 - Flew to Michigan; attended the Festival of Faith and Writing conference at Calvin College; had dinner with A&J, and ice cream. Mmmmmm.... Watch CSI or something...crazy, man. Not used that kind of visual graphic-ness. (New word.)

Fri 4/21 - Went to conference; heard Michael Card speak in 2 sessions! Oh, he was great. In one session he talked about lamenting, in the other he talked about Christ and creativity. I wish he would have been recorded. But he was a funny guy, and I liked what he had to say. He talked about bullet theology - he's really only going to speak for things he's willing to take a bullet for. Seemed like good theology to me! And I went to his concert that evening as well. Good times. It was fun to meet him, as he's probably one of the reasons I know Jesus. I also heard another speaker who talked about metaphor.

Sat 4/22 - More conference; started with Patricia Raybon, who was great. While she was talking, I thought I just wanted to hug her. Very sweet lady. I'll have to get her books sometime.

Heard Ted Dekker and had the chance to meet him. Great guy. I'll spare you the details. But I haven't often felt like I wasn't a stranger around someone I'd never met before. Buy Ted Dekker's books. Start with The Circle Trilogy. Go to your nearest bookstore and by Black (and Red and White). I'm shameless. :)

Sun 4/23 - Went to Holland, MI, to church with D&K. Had lunch with them, held the baby. Plans were cancelled with R&S (bummer), so I went to Hope's Gathering service that evening, which was wonderful. I felt like a proud parent! Best (Christian) college in the country. I'm sorry if you didn't go there. ;)

Mon 4/24 - Went back to Holland, took pictures (the weather was beautiful the whole time I was in Michigan), bought stuff, brought D&K dinner (they were so thankful), visited the lake, enjoyed good memories.

Tue 4/25 - Went to Frederick Meijer Gardens and saw carnivorous plants and butterflies (not together); flew back to Texas.

Wed 4/26 - Had a birthday. Turned 30. Very odd.

Thu 4/27 - Went out to dinner for birthday. Did lots of homework. Actually, procrastinated doing homework. Stayed up until 2am. Oops.

Fri 4/28 - Went to work. Took a German test. Had leftovers from last night for lunch. Tonight, b-day party.

Okay, I've done my shameless plug for Ted Dekker. I also need to add a shameless plug for Eric Wilson and Dark to Mortal Eyes. I'm sure Expiration Date is good as well, but I haven't had the chance to read it yet.

Mon, 03 Apr 2006 20:35:14 GMT

Ah-hahahahahaha!

I'm such a freak.

I'm going to Michigan on Thursday April 20th. So be-cited! I haven't been there for about 2 and a half years, so I'm looking forward to seeing friends and their babies. :D And it should be a nice time to be there - temps in the 50s and 60s, the tulips should be out in Holland. Hopefully it's not rainy the whole time I'm there! I'm staying with A&J. That makes me happy and amuses me at the same time. I may spend a night with D&K if they're up to it. Man...all my friends in Michigan come in pairs! >_>

Over the weekend I was thinking that I really wish I would have made the trip a day longer. I'd planned to come back on the 24th, but as I was thinking about it, decided that it'd be really nice to have an extra day to hang out with people, and because I was interested in going to the Festival of Faith and Writing conference at Calvin College.

So....... I got online to see if it was possible to change flights and how much it'd cost, and wouldn't you know, I accidentally scheduled myself to return on Tuesday the 25th instead of on the 24th! I'm so amazed when God looks out for me in little ways like that. :D

So, here's where I'm a freak: I'm going to the conference. WOO-HOO! And Ted Dekker is going to be there, and Michael Card is going to be there, and a bunch of other people whom I mostly haven't heard of. But Ted and Michael Card are going to be there! I can't tell you how excited I am. I'll love hearing them, but I think I'll also enjoy the rest of the conference. Who knows, it may even help get my creativity going a little bit more. I think it will be very interesting and a lot of fun.

And I should get to meet Ted!
[/freak]

Hope and Pleasure

Wed, 15 Mar 2006 20:30:49 GMT

Oy. I don't know how to say all this.

Since my last in depth lengthy entry on January 26th, my life has just taken off in this area.

The first weekend of February our church had its annual missions conference. I didn't particularly want to go (the last few have been rough for me), and the cost was too high. But a friend insisted that I go and made me get a scholarship. So I determined that I would go with 0 expectations, and that I wouldn't take everything as applying directly to me.

Long story short, on the first night one of the things the speaker encouraged was to repent of sin in our lives. I started looking around for sin and felt like I heard, "Don't go on a sin hunt." So I asked the Lord to show me if there was anything in my life He wanted to point out, and I would just sit there and wait for Him. His response? He absolutely flooded me with His presence. And He made it very clear then (and through the rest of the weekend) that the amazing pleasure I was experiencing was what He is feeling about me. Wow.

When I heard that I wasn't going to Germany (they felt like the Lord said no, and that's the only reason I'm not going), I was disappointed, I cried, but I did not at all think it was because I had done something wrong or wasn't good enough. I mean, God is incredibly pleased with me.

For the past few weeks, I've been reading a book called The Slumber of Christianity by, ahem, Ted Dekker. (I'm sorry! I don't mean to be a Dekkie!) It spoke exactly to everything that God has been saying to me (repeated a lot of it), and added some things that I hadn't completely grasped.

Like hope. Hope for heaven: for Jesus and "the outstanding pleasure of laying eyes on Christ", for complete salvation and redemption, resurrection, eternal life, our inheritance in Him, the reward of Him, love, peace, joy, and everything He has promised us. Pleasure forevermore. Bliss. Stunning, breath-taking, mind-bending, overwhelming pleasure.

And that is our goal. Not looking for every drop of sin and stomping it out (Jesus will do that and show us what we need to know), but our goal is Jesus, heaven. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross...." Hebrews 12:2 I was reading Hebrews at the same time I read Slumber and was amazed how often God's promise of reward and joy was the motivation to keep pressing forward and going on in life.

When I finished reading I had a couple thoughts:
1.) I felt like I'd been discipled. Not just some head knowledge, but really taught and lead and encouraged.
2.) I want to adopt Ted. As, like, an older brother. Heh. :) *blush*

Hello. :)

Wed, 15 Mar 2006 16:39:59 GMT

She lives!!

And my plot from my previous entry was successful. :D

I've been distracted...

Brief update!
I doesn't look like I'm going to Germany. At least not this summer, and not as a nanny. Not sure about the future...a little baffled by the series of events in all that and the fact that I went from being not at all interested in anything to do with Germany, to being really fired up about this team and what they're doing.

Still at my same job...kinda pondering another, but I don't know where...argh. And hearing "no" to Germany has left me feeling like, "Uhm....okay....so....where do I go from here?" So I don't really know in which direction to step. I've also been pondering getting a second job. I really want to get my school loans paid off!

But I've also rediscovered my giftings and that they're valuable. Like, I love to serve people and help free up their time and duties to do other things that God has called them to do. So...I've mentioned to some people to let me know if they need anything (because they'll be moving to Germany in a few months) because I'd love to help. I also helped some people work on a house the other day.

Still love my roommates. Still not dating anyone. There's someone I could be interested, but I don't really want to think about it. Oh! That's probably a new developement. I might want to get married. Eek!

I have more to say in the area of deep and profound, but I will say it in another entry.

I just had to say....

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 15:57:16 GMT

Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
I'm quite pleased with myself. I hope all goes according to plan.

That is all.

Grandpa Update

Wed, 15 Feb 2006 19:32:07 GMT

Thanks for praying for my grandpa. He's out of surgery and doing well. They were only able to do one bypass because the other (aorta? - I dunno) was calcified, but my mom didn't really know what that meant or what the implications were.

He's in a lot of pain (and apparently has thought maybe surgery wasn't a good idea), but the doctors say he's doing very well. So now we're praying for a quick recovery, and that they pain would go away!

And he turned 81 today. *GRIN*

Grandpa

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 14:11:33 GMT

My grandpa is having double bypass surgery today. :( Right now, actually. His 81st birthday is tomorrow!

I got to talk to him on the phone for a few minutes last night. He sounds pretty good. He wanted to make sure I was staying out of trouble. Heh. All the crazies (my family, the "Clampetts" as they tend to call themselves) were there.

I don't really know where my grandpa's relationship with the Lord is. But he said his pastor had been there earlier and he'd had communion. Then he said that the pastor had been there 3 times so, "Everything's good there." And he mentioned that the Lord takes care of us. So that was all encouraging.

Anyway, I'd appreciate any prayers for my grandpa. I haven't seen him in over a year. :(

Whoa....

Mon, 13 Feb 2006 22:34:45 GMT

Where have I been?

Good question. And not one that I have a good answer too!

I think I'm in that too-much-has-been-going-on-in-my-head mode so I can't figure out what to actually say.

But I've been trying to keep up with reading. I hope I haven't missed anything and made a butt of myself. :\

!!!!!

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 22:01:04 GMT

I really may be going to Germany this summer!

For a year!

In Wiesbaden!!

I can't believe I could live in Germany for a year.

My sister is going to kill me.

Longing for Heaven

Thu, 26 Jan 2006 16:37:05 GMT

Some people have criticized when Christians long for heaven, saying there are a lot of great things here on earth and it discounts those things, and sometimes accusing Christians of dispising good things on earth (and I think that some Christians actually do that).

But as I've been longing for Heaven, longing for more of God, there are times that I have a hard time finding Him and feeling like He's near. Because of what God is like and how amazing His presence is, not feeling His nearness can be a little like not being able to breathe (at least not well). So I've been learning to seek God in any place I can find Him. He created everything, everything is a gift from Him, all of creation speaks of Him, so surely I can find Him in the day to day.

And I have. I've found Him on a cold morning as I take a warm shower and let the water run over my face, and think, "This is a gift from God, this warmth and this comfort." And I know God is near. I've found Him in the evening as I crawl into bed under layers of blankets and couple pillows and realize how comfortable and warm and soft my bed and blankets are, and again realize it's a gift from Him and that He's near. I've found Him as I've sat on my front porch as a cool breeze blows across my back and the sun shines on my face. I've found Him when my friend is patient with me, despite my frustrations and annoyances. I've found Him in my roommate who is fun and playful and kind and caring. I've found Him in my small group as they prayed for me, and as one of the men (my dad's age) held me and let me cry. He is near. He is everywhere, if I will just look for Him.

In longing for Heaven, it's not discounting the gifts that are here on earth. They are wonderful, and I enjoy them and am thankful for them. I think of how wonderful all these gifts are...and am amazed that God promises Heaven and Himself to be even more than all that. It's not that earth really isn't all that good...it's that He is infinite and always has more. He's the God who gives so much comfort, love, pleasure that you think there can't possibly be any more...and then somehow He has more and gives it to you. Here we can drink of wonderful things...but He is an ocean and can, quite literally, drown us in His love... I heard someone (can't think of who, at the moment) once experienced God pour out so much of His love on him, that he actually had to ask God to stop "lest he die," drown, because it was so much, so intense...infinite love poured out into a finite heart.

It's not that I don't enjoy gifts on earth or don't think they're wonderful. I just dare to desire to drown.

(And I thought this before The Circle Trilogy...no wonder I enjoyed it.)

Things Stuck in the Brain

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 21:53:38 GMT

Ah! I keep thinking about the invitation to go to Germany to be a part-time nanny...and the idea seems to get more and more appealing the more I think about it! I don't want it to be appealing. I don't know if it's a good idea.

But it's certainly a fun and exciting idea. And I really like S&J and B&R! I mean, I'd thought before that if B&R weren't in Germany, I'd join their team. And their building a retreat center, which I think is such a great idea. And I'd get to use my German! Usually in cases where someone goes to help with the kids for a few months, the person doesn't know the language at all. But I'll know enough to get buy, which will totally give me a platform to learn and get much better at listening and speaking. And I'd just get to do something completely different.

And I'd get to live with a family, which is something I've been wanting to do for awhile. I'd be around people who were strong Christians, but also be around people who don't profess Christianity.

I really can't believe I'm actually thinking about this. It seems like I have no business thinking about it. Oddly enough, I probably wouldn't think about it for any other team. I think with these people and what their team focus is, I feel safe and completely free from any sort of pressure, perceived or otherwise. And it would be a good experience.

I probably need to decide in about a month, because I'll need to take a couple weeks off for staff training (in March) and get everything ready to go. I'm still trying to set up an appointment with KJ, but haven't heard back from his secretary. I may have to give her a call again.

Ich weiss nicht.

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 22:53:11 GMT

I've kind of gotten lost in the land of Ted Dekker. Oops. But it's been fun. Met a couple new people. I haven't been a newbie on a board in over 10 years. I've always joined boards where I already knew people who were there! Crazy, huh?

So, in the midst of my dilemma in figuring out what to do for the next year or so (new job? new city in moving to Omaha?) another curve was thrown at me. A couple friends of mine, S&J approached me, saying that they will be joining one of the teams in Germany, they've always had people live in their home and wanted to continue to that for community, as well as needed a part time nanny, and as they were praying about it, I came to mind. So are you interested in coming to Germany with us?

This is me screaming. =:O

Wiesbaden is a beautiful city - only 30 minutes from the airport by train...and the train leaves from the airport. I happen to know a little German (I'm in the 3rd semester). I like kids. The focus of the team is setting up a retreat center for the refreshment of missionaries (which I think is a great idea!). I also love the people on this team (2 couples and their kids right now) - they are so sweet. There is another team planting a church in a city 20 minutes away, and I would be able to hook up with them as well if I liked. They also have 2 singles girls and a single guy on the team, so I'd have relationship. And, well, it'd just be stinkin' cool to live in Germany for a year. Seriously!

I still don't know if I'd be able to with school loans. And I'd been thinking that I was going to move to Omaha, so I didn't really want another option thrown into the mix. But man, Germany really would be incredibly cool. And I wouldn't be sitting at a desk anymore!

Think Happy Thoughts!

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 14:45:39 GMT

I have a question.
Why is it that people (including Christians) prefer to talk about the horrible and tragic rather than the good and lovely? (Philippians 4:8) I mean, are we just looking for something to stir our emotions and give us a thrill and best connect with horror and "shock and awe"? I'm all for knowing about what's going on in the world, but we tend to bathe our minds in all the junk that is going on in the world. People generally don't care to talk about the blessings of God, the things He has done, and how amazing His character is. And He's a lot more thrilling and stirs our emotions more than the other stuff. I know I can do it too, but when I've tried bring up the good stuff, it's pulling teeth to get anyone else into it. They're too excited about the bad stuff to get excited about the good stuff. Anyway, that's all I have to say about that.

Well, that, and there's a junior high small group that meets at our house on Wednesdays. We have a basket on a shelf in the bathroom where we put our makeup and face stuff. This morning, all my eyeliner (black and brown) was gone. >_> Hm.

Okay! And yesterday my friend had a little boy! I think several of us thought she'd have a boy because he moved around constantly in the womb. (But the dad was pretty much clueless. Hee!) They have to stay in the hospital for 48 hours because she got some sort of virus and they want to make sure the baby is okay. He has lots of hair, and he's soooooooooooo cute. I love holding babies. :D

Grrrr...

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 17:23:01 GMT

So....frustrated....

One of the ladies at work has been mostly out of the office since about December 19th because her husband has been in the hospital, so I've been trying to get things done for her. Unfortunately, I recently discovered that I don't have the privileges to do some of what she does. So I've just been sitting around having this one issue hanging over my head for a week, trying to get someone to show me how to do it (before we realized I didn't have the security), trying to get someone to do it, or trying to get the security to do it. The lady who normally does it was actually in the office on Friday, she showed me how, discovered I didn't have the security, I gave it back to her to do it... and she didn't do it. Instead, she spent time doing stuff that I can do.

So the kid came back into the office today, trying to get the change done, so he can get into grad school. It'll take 5 minutes to do at the most. I'm the bad guy and the one who's trying to get it done without making any progress. It really makes me not want to do any work today.

Other Stuff

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 21:31:21 GMT

4 transcripts. I'm gone for an entire week, and all I come back to is 4 little transcripts?! Bah! Tan horrible.

Several of my "old Omaha friends" have recently gotten engaged. There was much engagement announcement while I was home, let me tell ya.

My sister and I went rollerskating. We tried to get The Brother to come along, but apparently, at the ripe age of 26, he's already an old fuddy-duddy and refused to go with us. Little punk! No amount of threatening, crying, begging and pleading, or girl-friend harassing would change his mind. He wanted to watch football...for the 100th time over the holidays. Mom and Dad have TiVo! Hit record! Sheesh.
TiVo: $400 (I dunno - I'm just throwing something out there)
Rollerskating with both sisters: Priceless
Punk!

My sister is in Berlin German until the end of July! She's doing an exchange program with her school. The classes end in April, but she's staying 3 months longer to do an internship. So, meine kleine Schwester will be fluent in German by the time she gets back. (That's Gerglish, which isn't as well known and Spanglish.) It'd be cool to go visit her, but I don't know that I'll be able to. I know other people in Germany whom I can visit too. It could be like a big German adventure. Except, no tengo dinero. Or, ich habe kein Geld. Or, I have no money.

Dude, it's so cool to be able to say things in 3 languages. I'm such a freak.

Happy New Year!

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 16:36:22 GMT

I'm back in Texas. Wee!

I had a good time in Omaha over Christmas thru New Year's. Spent time with family, spent time with friends. Got 3 more Ted Dekker books for Christmas at home (in addition to the 2 that Anne gave me); Star Wars episodes II and III; the new Todd Agnew CD; a cute, soft bear; and a $50 gift card to Kohl's. I ended up spending $100 *cough* so I got $20 in Kohl's cash...and went back yesterday to return the shoes I got to exchange for a more expensive pair by using the Kohl's cash. Yay! (The more expensive pair was just more comfortable!)

Well, over the past few months I've had several people ask, "Why don't you move back to Omaha?" I've kind of asked the Lord about it briefly, thought He said no, and pushed the thought aside. But so many people have asked me about it, that I'm asking, "Okay, Lord, what are you saying?" LR was kind of the last straw - I really value what she says, and her suggestion along with everyone else's is really making me think and pray about it. There are several things I'd want out of moving to Omaha: better (paying) job (they actually have IT jobs in Omaha!), more healing (body, soul, and spirit) ministry, greater feeling of connectedness (to me), opportunity for involvement in ministries areas that I'm interested in and more people in those ministries (there are people in those ministries here, but they aren't "gathered" together).

The down side: my friends are here and the uncertainty of the unknown (it may not work out the way I'd like, I may not feel connected, have to make new friends, etc, etc). I do have friends there, but I just don't see them often, and I've gotten to know them more at a distance (since I've been away most of the time we've known each other). But it is helpful that I do know people - I wouldn't at all be moving to a place where I didn't know anyone at all, like when I moved here.

So, I'm taking the next couple of days to really ask the Lord what He's saying and where He's leading me. Oy. The thought of moving is really scary. The thought of staying feels safe, but it also can feel frustrating and even hopeless. For years I've actually wanted to go home, to learn from the people there and be around them. I really value who they are. But I'm afraid I have expectations that are too high. That's probably the biggest reason why I've never moved back: at first because things changed (because they always do) and I didn't know if I could handle everything being different from the way it used to be. Now because I have hopes for what could be, but don't know if it will be. I had so many hopes for when I moved here, but was disappointed in almost everything. There were some things I could have done differently, but other things I had absolutely no control over. But God has really been with me through it all - I've heard more from Him, learned more from Him, and known His nearness in ways I hadn't known before. But part of me has lived on my own for the past 10 years, the deep parts of my heart have been alone. I have felt like the Lord has been taking away the grace for me to be on my own. Is He also taking away the grace for me to live here?

I had coffee with a couple of older friends and they both asked, "How's your heart?" I'm so not used to that question, to someone just out right asking about my heart. Both times I had to hold back tears. I guess the simple answer would just be, "It hurts." Is there room there for someone whose heart just hurts and needs some healing? It seems like there hasn't been here. I don't think that's intentional at all. "It takes a village to raise a child." Maybe I'm just someone who just needs a village.

A Poll (Sorta)

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 22:09:10 GMT

I'm, eh, not a paying lj member, so I can't actually create a real poll.

But! My question:
Regifting?
Yes or no
(and why?)

Blar!

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 20:07:16 GMT

Why is the US Postal service so incredibly slow? "2 or 3 days" was 2 or 3 days ago!

Indescribable

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 16:20:03 GMT

I feel like crying. Not for bad reasons, but because of the amazing love of God. You know the story of the king who wants to find orphaned or lonely children to take home with him and live with him - they would be his children and he their father - but he didn't want to frighten them at his approach, so he dressed as a commoner. It's an analogy of how God has come to us...but after reading White by Ted Dekker, it seems woefully inadequate. He did so much more than that...with joy and excitement and enthusiasm...as a man going to any length to win the love of the one he has set his heart on, and then taking it even farther than that. Stopping at nothing to rescue her and love her and win her; strong and mighty, yet filled with emotion. The only thing that can overwhelm Him is her (your) eyes, looking at Him, loving Him. "Beautiful. Wonderful. Incredible," He says. (And now I am teary-eyed.)

I love the name Elyon for God. I don't know why. I guess for some reason it feels more personal. "God" and "Lord" are more titles...for some reason I don't seem to often say Jesus when speaking to Him...maybe I should. Elyon means, "Most High," so it's meaning is a title, but the meaning of my name can be a title, "judge," too. That's amazing though...I wouldn't call the president "George" (no matter how I feel about him - I wouldn't have called the former president "Bill"), I'd call him by his title. Mr. President. But I can call God - the One who created everything, who rules everything, who has complete power and authority, who lives forever and dwells in "unapproachable light" - not just by His title, but by His name. Elyon. Jesus.

I really can't wait to be with Him...to look into His eyes and see Him and be with Him with no veil between us. I can't imagine. But I also believe He has more for us here...He said it was better that He went away because He'd send us His Spirit. Jesus, send Your Spirit in greater ways. (And let us welcome Him!) Send Your Spirit and let us really see and know You...we need You so much..

Encouragement in the Face of Disappointment

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 20:27:19 GMT

I emailed my life group about not getting the job...and was amazing at all the replies I got. I didn't want to send the email out. I wondered why I didn't really want to tell anyone about it, and it seemed like it was just because I wasn't chosen. It was like I wasn't good enough and was rejected. But people in my lg totally understood that without me even having to say it, and were so encouraging. It feels like I've never (or very rarely) gotten responses like that - responses of understanding, encouragement, and love. And I think I needed it, because I was really bummed. (Like, if I would have taken a minute to sit down and think about it, I probably would have cried.) I don't know how to respond to all those emails though...just, "Thanks so much, I appreciate it," or what?

I signed up to take the next German class in the Spring, but I may end up taking Spanish. We'll see!

I also think I am the queen of understatement when it comes to internal heart stuff. If I say, "That kinda hurt," interpretted into the language of most people, that would be, "Someone just stuck a knife into my heart and twisted it, and now I'm bleeding profusely."

Must....read....

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 19:31:39 GMT

Black
Red
White
Ted Dekker

Read 'em.

(I'm so bossy!)

!

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 22:32:48 GMT

Ah-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

I'm pleased with myself.
I haven't really done a great feat or done anything all that special. But, I'm pleased with myself nonetheless.

Ah-hahaha!