Current mood:	devious
Entry tags:	the meaning of life

A House Huntin' We Will Go
I had always heard that looking for a house was hard, but I never thought it could be so crazy. We've only been seriously looking for a house for about a week, and it has already been a mess. At first, we found a few decent little houses in our price range, but everything was too out of the way of everything. Today, we found a really nice place that was a foreclosure. It had a big 2 acre flat yard, and it had 4 bedrooms, and 2 bathrooms, with a giant bathtub.
Then, the neighbor decided to stop by along with his 3 kids. He was a thin fellow of about 110 lbs with a dusty blonde stack of hair, and a healthy "womb broom" to match. As we were leaving to go make an offer to the bank, he flagged down our real estate agent. I saw them walk over to the house we were looking at and he went underneath like it was his own house! I got out to see what was going on, and he was giving some story about how the previous owners had a water line break, and ruined all the insulation under the house. I felt of it, and it seemed like it was sagging a little, but nothing major. I was going to have someone come out and inspect it before I bought the place.
He then said something that gave away the reason for his trip over there. He said, "I made an offer already for $25,000, and they said I couldn't have it!" The guy reeked of alcohol, so the real estate agent and I thanked him for the heads up, and started to leave. Then he ran over to her truck and flagged her down again.
I thought that was a little odd, but I just thought he was being nice. Come to find out, the guy had stopped her and said: "You tell them kids that this driveway is on MY LAND!!!" Later, when the real estate agent was explaining the property lines, I thought it was kind of funny because she kept referring to him as "Freaky Guy," like "Freaky guy's house is here, and here's the house you were looking at..."
I think I'm forever haunted by weirdos wherever I go, because I could tell a story about pretty much every place that I have lived (and that would be like eight places.) The real estate lady said we could all go and roll his house one night. I think that would be quite the hilarity. We suggested to go and paint "This is our driveway! (from the Leprechauns under the house next door)" on the side of his house. He sounded kind of like one of the villains off of Scooby-Doo or something with his "Tell them kids" statement. I wish I had an evaporator gun so that I could make people like him just evaporate into the air. Maybe that'll be my next project...