Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Bill's LiveJournal:

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Monday, February 20th, 2006
11:08 pm	What happened with Mike and Sarah. I have said it enough times and I am tired of repeating myself over and over again, so now I am just going to point people here and that will be the end of it. I am done and I want to put this behind me. There's no reason that I should hold this grudge. I am willing to put this in the past because I still love my brother. I am going to substitute relations instead of names to protect some people. Other than that, it has been a LONG while since I have updated this thing... I think that it is time for an update. My brother and I have a great relationship, he still lives at home, I live away from home about 15 miles away. We used to pass our time when we are together when I am over there, or he is over here playing a game such as Unreal Tournament or other first-person shooter games. Most recently it has been Fantasy Star Online and we would play for hours. Until recently... The problem I have is that he has a girlfriend that is very demanding of his time. Not that this is an absolute problem, but I see it as a problem. When I go and visit, it is usually on a time frame with, "I am getting ready to go out with GF" or "GF is coming over and we are going to hang out" or GF is already there hanging out. Some times GF calls and he spends over an hour on the phone with her and I am still in the next room with the game on pause. Well, after several times with this, I have done several things to drop hints, which I am not sure has worked as effectively as I had hoped. 1) Packed up and left 2) Waited it out 3) Knocked on the door while he was on the phone at intervals and asked if he was going to be done soon and eventually packed up and left. And, it is also not with just me, either. Bro and I have a cousin that lives in Illinios. We see her and her son (I call him my nephew) about once in a blue moon. Well, GF was over and so was our cousin and nephew. Bro wanted to go and visit with GF and Mom stoped him to ask a question about nephew, he said, "I have company". Our cousin said, "is your nephew not company". And, since Bro has a VERY hot temper, he stormed off and spent time with GF. I eventually cornered him on the phone and said, "I am getting the feeling that you do not want to spend time with me" and he was in shock and asked why. I gave him the reasons with her kinda listening in on the phone (can hear the phone at a short distance). He said, "well, I have a girlfriend" and I came back saying, "you have a brother first and your brother wants to spend time with you." Well, his GF did not like that at all since I believe that she is very possessive and not willing to share. I did manage to spend a day with him before he had to go to work. His GF did not call, she did not come over, but we had a good day. Later, I found out though Mom that they had a fight over me and what I said and what he may have said to her to not call while I was over there. (Way to go Mom!) One day, I was going to help them hook up a wireless network so Bro could use it in his room, Dad could use it in his office and everyone is happy and have internet access in the house. I was heading out the door on Friday after work with documentation, cables and stuff to assist in my hooking it up. He called me and said, "can you come over later" and I asked why. He said that he was busy and wanted to spend time with me to learn about it. I said that I have already planned out that day and was going to use Monday as a backup in case I could not get it working. He was upset at this and persisted that I come over Monday. I refused and he slammed down the phone. I was coming over if he liked it or not because I was free that evening and was able to go over there and was not going to reschedule my Monday because I had other plans in the works. Well, guess what? GF was over there and Bro was with her and M&D was not home. Fancy that. How convienent. I got the router working on Dad's computer, but Bro's network card was not working so he had some difficulties with the device. He had a LOT of software on it and lo and behold, the wireless wasn't working and locked up. Later than that, (this is what topped it off) Mom and I gossip about everything. We have a wonderful relationship. Mom also shared that she had caught them in the driveway... making out... several times... and didn't say anything to them or Dad... yet. I was visiting Mom and Dad when Bro and GF came in off of their date. She had a VERY strong perfume on and I being an asthmetic started coughing and said it was strong. She complained, I said that it was strong and, knowing full well what they did in a parking lot somewhere, they "parked". And, an old trick to hide the "sex smell" was to put perfume or cologne on at the end of the date, and I asked them bluntly, "aren't you supposed to put perfume on at the BEGINNING of the date and not at the end?" Well, I outed them and they didn't like it. Not one bit. About an hour later, I finished watching TV with Mom and Dad and started to leave. I usually say good bye to Bro before I leave. They had Ghost playing on TV (Patrick Swayze) and I stopped to watch the end... close to where the ghosts come out of the shadows and get the guy's ghost that murdered Patrick Swayze at the beginning of the movie. Well, GF started mumbling something about the perfume and me not liking it and I didn't hear her, she said it louder and I said, "it was strong and it's not as bad now". Well, she flipped, and started saying, "f-this and f-that and f-everything else" and I held up my hands and said, "woah! Chill". Ok, this didn't help and I could have done something else, like leave. What happened next was a blur and I don't really remember everything. She threw the remote control at me I picked it up to put it back together (I am a tekkie by heart) GF kicked at me still f-ing everything Bro pushed me into the wall trying to get me out the door (did not damage the wall) I try to get my footing and grab something off the dresser to beat him off of me I get something to beat him off of me I get pushed out the door and run into our dad my pants fall down (no kidding) Well, M&D stopped this, Dad took me into the living room and talks to me, Mom talks to the two of them asking questions and hushing the other when she was talking to one. I feel really bad about the whole thing and GF is clearly upset, still f-ing everything and mom sits her down to talk to her. I talk to dad for a while and eventually leave the house and call when I get home ok. I find out through Mom that GF has had some issues at her own house and when she argues with her sister, her mother grounds her (but the grounding has no teeth). She escapes the grounding by spending time with Bro at M&D's after work before going home. It seems that she had brought some issues over to M&D's and I was the trigger for the violent eruption I was subjected to. There was a time that I was really mad at her and wished that I had just hauled off and just decked her. Like no kidding. Layed her out on the floor and stomped on her... I really can't nail her in the nuts and I wasn't looking for a fight. But that's just as bad as her throwing the remote at me. I would think about it and my body would convulse in reaction, but not any more. But, as I said earlier, I love my brother, I want our relationship to last, I am willing to put this behind me and continue on. If GF still hates me, fine, so be it, but do not poison my brother against me. I have forgiven my brother and let him know that I am willing to move on. He had laid out his wireless network card on the counter and wants to use my dad's business laptops to test a theory of his. Dad does not want him to use his laptops for security reasons. I wrote and stuck a post-it note on the card on the counter letting him know that I had another card he can try with my phone number. Dad and I went out to get something and came back. Bro was downstairs with GF and I called down asking him if he got my note. He said yes. I said just give me a call when he's wanting to try it out because I have drivers and the card. The ball is in his court. Current Mood: drained Current Music: Single Gun Theory - Words Written Backwards (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, November 12th, 2004
3:52 pm	Another Update Hi, all.. It's time for another (overdue) update! I am doing very well compared to the last several entires. I just moved into another apartment in June with better access to the expressway and better to access my customers. I moved from the East end of Louisville over to the Northeast end off of Westport Road and Chamberlain Lane. The access to the Expressway is good, but the access from the Expressway to home is not so good if coming from South-bound Gene Snyder. I either have to get off at Brownsboro Road and take some back roads to get to my apartment. Or, I have to get off at the Westport Road exit and cut across 2 lanes of traffic from the entrance ramp to make the light to turn onto Chamberlain Lane. From North-bound, it's perfect. There's a light on the ramp, I take a left, another left and I am on Chamberlain Lane. No problems. Anyway... work is going very well. I am good at what I do, and I like what I am doing. I get paid for what I do and it gets me where I need to go. I work with a great team of guys. Also, I am a full time employee with my company instead of a contractor. Got a dollar raise and I believe that I am in for the LONG haul. The reason I say this is that there was one guy that has just retired after working 40 years. There's another guy that has been there for 25, and another two that has been there for 20+ years. Then there's another guy that has been there for three generations of one of the guys there for 25. He worked with his father untill he retired, worked with him for some years, and now the son is working. So, I think that I can really retire from this company. Anyway, now that I have a long-term job, I can plan on long-term goals: I have plans on paying off my last credit card which should not take too long to do, then, I'll plan on getting one small (under $1000) credit card to rebuild my credit. With this, I'll purchase a stackable Washer and Dryer from Sears or someplace like that and pay this off in no time at all. Then, in May, I'll consolidate my student loans together once one loan comes out of default status. Currently, I still have two student loans. One that's just under 9k and working to get out of default status. Currently I am paying $150 per month on this student loan. The other is just over 16k and not in defualt status, but in deferment which means that I am not paying on it, but it still collects interest. I'll plan on taking out a 30-year consolidation loan to lower the payments and pay off the loans within 5 years. Now, being generous, we'll say that I have 25k in loans. If I take out a 5 year loan, I'll expect to pay 417/mo; 10, 209/mo; 15, 139/mo; 20, 105/mo; 25, 84/mo; 30, 70/mo... So, well see where I can go with this loan. Some one suggested to talk to Salle Mae for assistance in this. We'll see, and it won't be unitil May that this can be completed. I have time, albiet not much. Till the next update... whenever THAT is. Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: O-Zone - Mai Ai Hii (Comment on this)
Saturday, July 5th, 2003
11:32 pm	Time for another rant. It's time for a rant. You know, one of these rants that you have been bottling up for a while. The kind of rant that feels like a splinter, but you don't know you had a splinter until you actually found it and took it out, and you realize how much torment that that one little splinter caused... you KNOW what I mean. But... you have to love these personals ads pages that are out there. It seems that there are a lot of folks out there that I would like to meet, like to get with some time for coffee or what-not. Sure, there are folks out there aplenty! I am looking for some one that I can grow old with, some one my age-group, none of this generation-gap stuff, no one that is as old (or older) than my father or younger than my brother. I am, 29, I should be able to find some one... any one, maybe just a nibble of some one that is my age range or so. And, I am not asking for much... I am actually looking for some one that is between 25 and 33. This is my age range. Is that asking for much? Four years down and four years up. But NoooOOOoooo... I am looking at these ads and what do I see, some ads that say stuff like this: "I am 18, tried everything/everyone and ready to settle down." Oh, please, if you are 18 and have tried everything, than there is something seriously wrong here. Either you are an outright fake, or you have been sexually active since you were like eight. And since you have tried everything/everyone, what makes me think that you are perfectly safe to be with? Time to move on... I am 45, I think you are hot and sexy... come to my place and we'll do things that would embarrass your mother. This is too funny. Obviously, you don't know my mother. She's not one to take the crap from anyone, particularly you who thinks that you are God's gift to humanity for being placed on this earth. Secondly, I don't like lines like this. It's an obvious turn-off to me. Imagine Madonna, Bjork and Bette Midler singing in a trio combined with an chorus of kazoos with the melody of fingernails on a chalk board. That does not sound to appealing... Now, fast forward a bit, I am looking at some of these ads that are on line. Here's one for an 18 year old.... what is with this "boi" or "boie" stuff. It's spelled boy. And, usually the term "boy" indicates that you are a child. I can make up something, but that would be three strikes. Besides, I was already going through my first communion by the time you were born. Now, let's go to the other side of the coin. These are the guys that think that they are there for me to suit them. These are the guys that are several years older than I. I think that they were drinking and voting by the time that I was born. For some reason, I seem to attract these guys. Sorry but I would like to grow old with you... not watch you grow old and wheel-chair bound etc, etc... Ok, I am done here. This is Bill... out. Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: Utah Saints - What Can You Do For Me (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 25th, 2003
7:17 pm	It was bound to happen, and I am disappointed. The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels: Level Score Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) High Level 2 (Lustful) Very High Level 3 (Gluttonous) Moderate Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Low Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Low Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Low Level 7 (Violent) High Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) Moderate Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) Low Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test Current Mood: disappointed Current Music: Erasure - Respect (acoustic) (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, June 13th, 2003
8:19 pm	This works! You are The Cap'n! Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not. What's Yer Inner Pirate? brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr! Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Blancmange - Living on the ceiling (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 28th, 2002
12:05 am	Profile for a new job. Hi, all! I write this to you as some one who spends too much time in front of computers, and as some one that has spent the last nine months looking for a job... and finally got one! I now work for the Kentucky Department of Education in the tallest building in Frankfort, KY. The helpdesk has a small bio/profile in which they each tell a little about themselves in a short story (unless I am missing something). Well, here's my short story. Profile: Once upon a time, there was a helpdesk, and it was good. The helpdesk said that there need to be a staff, and it was so. The helpdesk looked at the staff and said, "They must be savvy with the knowledge of the ages old and new." The helpdesk smiled and made it so. The helpdesk looked at the staff and said, "They must be able to speak clearly with complete thoughts." The helpdesk smiled and made it so. The helpdesk looked at the staff and said, "They must be able to do more than they are capable of doing and juggle them with grace and ease unbeknownst to the end-user." The helpdesk smiled and made it so. The helpdesk looked at the staff and said, "They must be able to multi-task, have excellent customer skills, a great attitude, the willingness to turn the other cheek, adapt quickly to the unknown and still maintain a degree of professionalism." The helpdesk winced with the thoughts of the impossible, arched his eyebrows, which now beaded with perspiration, smiled weakly and made it so. The helpdesk looked around to see if anything were missing, the presence of which would make a difference of what was asked of him, he shrugged to himself, looked at the staff with confidence and said: "Let there be calls!" The helpdesk smiled and made it so. This fine young lad comes from a far-off land called Middletown in the county of Jefferson where he lives with his two beasts of feline ethnicity, grows great plants that belittles the tales of a beanstalk and enjoys creating cuisine of lands he has never seen. He also enjoys recreation of camping, traveling and canoeing. He travels from long distances to bring the people he reaches joy, laughter and technical support. He comes from many companies far and wide to where he honed his skills in customer service, technical support and has worked in nearly everything from a telemarketer, a tele-service technician, technical support from basic troubleshooting of large companies to technical support just under programmers of small businesses. He loves what he does and is very good at getting to know something about nearly every person he comes in contact with. He has a pleasant sense of humor and is not afraid to find the silver lining out of clouds and bring them into view for everyone to see including the person he is talking to. In his spare time, he assists in a non-profit organization, supervises courses in this organization and attends leadership training in the non-profit organization and contributes much of his time in this organization. In other days, he spends his time in front of a computer, programming code, maintaining and updating his web site and web pages. He also manages to stay out of trouble in this fashion. Current Mood: creative Current Music: Steve Miller Band - Abracadabra (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 25th, 2002
4:10 pm	Grandmothers. It's lonely days like today that makes me think of things outside of the norm. I was hanging up a couple of mirrors that I "inherited" from my grandmother's house in my bedroom when I went with that downward spiral of regret. I regret that I didn't spend as much time as I wanted to with my grandmother I regret that I didn't attend her funeral I regret that I didn't tell her enough times that I loved her. Ah well, I'll be ok. It's not like I can do anything now, I have already visited her funeral plot twice since she dies. Once my mother does not know about. Till then. Current Mood: lethargic Current Music: Billy Joel. - River of Dreams (Comment on this)
4:09 pm	Grandmothers. It's lonely days like today that makes me think of things outside of the norm. I was hanging up a couple of mirrors that I "inherited" from my grandmother's house in my bedroom when I went with that downward spiral of regret. I regret that I didn't spend as much time as I wanted to with my grandmother I regret that I didn't attend her funeral I regret that I didn't tell her enough times that I loved her. Ah well, I'll be ok. It's not like I can do anything now, I have already visited her funeral plot twice since she dies. Once my mother does not know about. Till then. (Comment on this)
Saturday, July 20th, 2002
8:45 pm	I feel like Joy and Doug! I know that you don't know who these people are, but in my life, they were perhaps some of the most influential people that I could have known. Many years ago, I used to raise rabbits for show and for pets, I miss them, but I have the values that they taught me many years ago. Joy and Doug used to also raise rabbits with me, and they did things that I still remember. How I am like them NOW is that Joy used to make things (en masse) all the time, and put it in a freezer, or make things that would be a dinner, or a meal, and use them for snacks or lunch. For example, she would make a BIG pot of chili and divvy it up into portions and freeze it. She would make egg salad by the ton and use it for sandwiches, and give them away at shows. She would make an entire thing of meat loaf (dinner thing, right?) and make it just for sandwiches. Well, I found myself making my chicken stew (not soup) and packing it into those little glad-ware containers and putting it in the freezer. I didn't eat that for dinner today, I had hamburgers for lunch and now I am eating spaghetti and garlic bread (recipe below). We are talking about one of my stockpots of chicken stew. The, "going to Sam's and getting a couple of things, I'll be right back," pot of stew. One LARGE can of chicken (the cooked, and near-shredded canned chicken), potato soup mix enough for eight servings, a can of peas, carrots, corn and green beans. YUM! So now, I am set for the next week for chicken stew! Now as I close this entry, I am looking down and seeing a very happy kitten asleep in my lap. Till then. Current Mood: content Current Music: Ministry Of Sound [ATB] - Clubbers Guide to Trance (1) (Comment on this)
6:07 pm	eharmony.com I know... I clicked the link, but I thought to myself, "What do I have to lose?" After a lengthily profiling process, this is what eharmony.com told me: Some of the following information may seem inaccurate or incomplete. Remember, that this profile is a snapshot of your personality at a specific moment. It is not intended as an in-depth analysis of your complete being, but as a tool to aid in self-discovery. You have a strong feeling of optimism, considered favorably by most people around you. Your perception is that the bottle is half-full rather than half-empty. You have to be with people. This extends into the need to gain popularity, achieve social recognition and influence those people around you. The "bottom-line" is a strong people orientation. You have a strong sense of humor. You usually know when to lighten a difficult situation, amuse and entertain people. Each person has a unique way of communicating. We use a combination of body language, facial expression, verbal tone and word choice to share ourselves with others. The following statements offer a look at the natural behavior you bring to an interpersonal relationship. One of your great strengths is your ability to communicate and talk readily. Since all strengths may be overused at times, you may sometimes talk too much. You show sympathy to the feelings and needs of others. Your natural empathy style may draw others to you. You can generate enthusiasm in yourself and in other people. Your enthusiasm, often contagious, involves many people in a social activity who might not ordinarily become involved. You have a natural, outgoing style that some have labeled as the "natural salesperson." You are generally likable, talkative and socially assertive. Your primary intent is convincing or persuading people. You are a natural communicator. You love to talk, offer jokes and make sure that everyone is having a good time. This trait is especially evident at functions and outings. Many different factors determine the communication styles with which you are most comfortable. Some individuals thrive on the challenge of pointed criticism, while others are at their best in a nurturing environment where criticism is offered as a suggestion for improvement. Each of us has a unique set of requirements and preferences. Below is a list of communication styles that will mesh well with your own. Having a partner who understands and practices these traits is important to your long-term happiness. Offer immediate rewards for accomplishments. Be prepared to listen to many stories. Ask for opinions and ideas. Leave plenty of time for socializing and relating. Be stimulating, fun-loving, and fast-moving. Present ideas softly, non threateningly. Work to achieve mutual satisfaction. Ask "How" questions to draw out opinions. Start with a personal comment to "break the ice." Talk about expectations. Share specific ideas to carry out an action. Move casually, informally. This section identifies specific talents and behavior that you bring to a personal relationship. In order to cultivate a successful relationship it is vital to be familiar with your interpersonal strengths and weaknesses. A very calming person with the ability to calm excited people. Dependable partner. Excellent sense of humor; see humor in events spontaneously. An excellent listener to the concerns and ideas of others. Supportive of others. Never a dull moment. Work for others without taking a leadership role. An excellent "win-win" type of negotiator. Sincere in what you say and do. Very optimistic; make others feel good about themselves. Loyal team player. Enthusiastic about activities and involvement. In general, human beings are defined by their needs and individuals by their wants. Your emotional wants are especially important when establishing with whom you are compatible. While answering the Relationship Questionnaire you established a pattern of basic, subconscious wants. This section of the report was produced by analyzing those patterns. Our wants change as we mature and obtain our life goals. You may find it valuable to revisit this section periodically to see how your wants have changed. You may want: Freedom from many controls and limitations of creativity. Acceptance in a variety of groups. Social recognition of your accomplishments. Protection or insulation from aggression or confrontation. Peace and harmony. Equal relations with others. Support of your ideas and dreams. Activities involving contact with many people. A friendly, favorable social environment. Partners who practice listening and participation. Recognition of skills and ability Each of us has types of people with whom we feel an immediate bond and rapport. We also know of personality types with whom we are less likely to "get along." The types of people identified below represent personality types with whom it may be difficult for you to form a long-term satisfying relationship. Review the traits of these challenging personality types and be thoughtful of each as you consider your match selection. Challenging People Positive words that describe this type of person: Factual Logical Analytical Prober Good Listener Incisive Words that describe this type of person under moderate pressure, tension, stress or fatigue: Blunt Suspicious Skeptical Pessimistic And, words that describe this type of person under extreme pressure, stress or fatigue: Aloof Critical Moody Overly intense Let's see if this one can find me a mate. (Comment on this)
12:35 am	Cooking with Bill. Edition one. Ok, you KNOW that I am really bored when I start to type out recipes, but this one was too good to pass up and I don't want to forget this one. You know, the type of recipe that you put together and found in cooking that it turned out absolutely divine? The kind of recipe that you made and can't remember how it was done? Well, I did it, and I am willing to share it with you. It's one of these recipes that came out of my bachelor-cooking in the bachelor-kitchen in my bachelor-apartment. Bill's Garlic Bread Pre-heat your oven to 450 and prepare your ingredients. There should be directions on the side of the Jiffy box of mix, this is just an addition to their mix. two boxes of Jiffy buttermilk biscuit mix one cup of water (room temperature) 1/2 cup of parmesan cheese (granules, not shredded) 1/3 cup of garlic pepper (the type you can buy at Sam's, we are talking some SERIOUS bulk here) 1 heaping tablespoon of oregano (again, the Sam's Bulk. LONG LIVE THE SPICE) 1 tablespoon vegetable oil non-stick cooking spray. I prefer Pam. Mix the dry ingredients together in a two quart bowl with a fork or tablespoon. The biscuit mix should clump together with the cheese Stir in the water with the mix and you will wind up with a "dough-blob" at the bottom of your bowl. Perfect! Once you have your dough-blob, it will be considered quite sticky and immobile at the bottom of the bowl Stir in the tablespoon of oil and your dough-blob will become a dough ball and should be easy to shape and move about the bowl take your non-stick spray and spray a film of the stuff onto a plastic chopping mat or plastic cutting board (I don't recommend using a wood board here, it will be too hard to clean) take your dough-blob and place on the chopping mat, make sure that your fingers are some what oily as you will need to kneed the tough to about an inch thickness Once you have flattened your blob, take a sharp knife and start cutting out the dough and rolling the dough into a ball that's about an inch across. A good eye will be the judge of that use the same non-stick spray and spray a cookie sheet to put the dough on arrange the dough-balls about an inch apart from one another on the cookie sheet and slightly squash the dough so they are flattened, but not flat bake the dough on the cookie sheet for ten minutes on 450 Makes 20 Current Music: techno - ministry of sound clubbers guide to trance cd2 (Comment on this)
Monday, July 8th, 2002
2:09 am	Most of it. And then some. I got most of my stuff back. I think that it was a result of a letter that I stuck on her windshield when I passed by her house on the way home from running an errand (mentioned in previous journal). The note I stuck on her windshield was as follows: 8:27pm Erynn- Long time no hear! Hope you get the promotion at work, have not heard from you in a while. I was in the neighborhood and I thought I could borrow your cordless screwdriver for some projects around the apartment. Shelves, holes in the wall, etc. -Saw your car in the driveway and thought I would stop and say "Hi!" with no answer at the door. Give me a call, ICQ, e-mail, etc. Take care! -Bill I woke up this morning (afternoon) with my brother pounding on the door saying, "You have Home World on your front porch." Apparently she must have dropped it off this morning or last night. With a check, the CD's are intact, (no scratches) and she held true to her promises. I will say, she is a person with high integrity. There is no kidding about that. I do have a high respect for her with being a no nonsense person, a woman that has something on her mind, and she's going to go for it. I will also say that she would be GREAT with LEC and the programs they provide. She puts something in her future and gets it. And, for some one that has not taken LEC's programs, it's unheard of. For me, this "hedonistic" approach to her life is admirable, if not attractive. A-N-Y-W-A-Y! This evening, I sent her a note saying thank you for returning my stuff. Here's a copy: Good day! My brother came over and said that I had "HomeWorld on my front porch" and I want to thank you for returning them for me. But, there are two problems: The Homeworld CD Case had a CD Key on the case itself, and not on the CD, I am needing that back. The Second Homeworld CD was not in the box, it's orange and black (mostly black) with what looks like an orange spiral. I don't know if you got my note or not (I would imagine you did since I left it on your car) but I would like to borrow your cordless screwdriver for a couple of projects I have around the house like putting up shelves and what not. I would also like to have a call or to come over to catch up on things, it's been a while and I would like to know if you got that management position and how you like it. If you also need a ride to the airport, I would like to offer you a ride there. No problem! Take care, and I hope to see you soon. :) There comes a time that I just want to do something to what she has been doing to me, and what she has been doing to other people. It's like I want to fix all that she is. You know those people, you want to reach out and help them, because they are aching for your help. Well, a conversation I had with a friend of mine tonight and my horoscope seems to have changed that, and my prospective: Don't waste even a second on those people that simply want to suck the life out of you. Don't argue with them, don't try to set them straight and don't try to save their souls. Put as much of your energy, instead, into those people who energize and inspire you. Right now the momentum is working in your favor, and you could go on to do great things -- that is, if you steadfastly refuse to let the Lilliputians keep you tied down. You are on the right track, and you are in rhythm with the Universe. The conversation that he and I had came up with one conclusion and once he mentioned this, it was a clearing appeared and a new page of the book of my life arrived, begging me to start over. He said that I wanted revenge. This hit home, and true. As much as I didn't want to look at it, and as slimy as it was, it was the truth. I wanted to get back at her, I wanted to lash out and say that she was a bad person for treating me like she did. I wanted to tell her that she was wrong for treating her mother like she does and things like that. She told me that she once struck her mother. The exact phrase was, "I have struck my mother for less." It gives me chills to think of my mother in that circumstance. I have NEVER struck my mother, nor could I ever, nor will I. I love my mom too much to think of her any less of the woman who gave birth to me, loved me, raised me these 28 years, kissed my bruises, picked me up when I fell down and told me that she loved me. (wipes tears from eyes). But, onto the future! That will be my final note to Erynn E. Unverferth, "Nantala M. Lavarenlavadora" (one in the same). I am cutting my losses, saying "good-bye" to those CD's that she still has in her possession and moving on with my life. She has controlled too much of my life as it is in her own way and I am choosing to cut my ties with her by deleting her out of my folders, e-mail, ICQ list, etc. I think that LEC has an analogy similar to what I see going on here, although I won't say this to set it in stone, but I do see the humor involved here. "It's like Godzilla going through Tokyo." The monster rampages through the city knocking over buildings, realizes what he is doing and turns to the right to look at what's going on behind him. Meanwhile, as he is looking, his tail knocks over all of the buildings to his left. They are decimated! Hearing this, he looks to the left to find out what's going on and wipes out the remaining buildings to his right, effectively creaming them. Not knowing what he is doing, the monster shrugs and continues on his way through Tokyo and creating his path of destruction. The music I have playing now is one of the last bits of what I have left of the Home World CD. It's the opening theme with choral singing. It's quite nice and what really sold me on the game. If you can find it, it's also called "Angus Dei". Be sure when you do a music search to include the name "Homeworld". Current Music: Homeworld - Homeworld Main Theme (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 7th, 2002
2:06 am	I want my CD's back! It's been almost a month since I gave her tools back and I still have not got my CD's, nor my DVD's back. For me, this is almost agonizing to know that she still has my CD's and I have nothing of hers to hold for "ransom." Which I just found out that she "Will give me my stuff back after she comes home from her girlfriend's place." ETA, Two weeks. We'll see. Anyway, I went over to her place this evening with the intent to borrow her cordless screwdriver. Yes, I was in the neighborhood since she lives in the area of the east end VET (vehicle exhaust testing) center. Yes, I needed to find out the hours (they are closed on Monday which is what I needed to know). And, yes, I do need to have a cordless screwdriver. Why? I hear you ask... I am putting up shelves in my storage closet and I need to screw in the supports. Nails will NEVER hold and the space that I need to sink the screws are several inches deep. To turn even one by hand is nothing less than painful, especially with a developed corporal tunnel syndrome in the left wrist and a developing CTS in the right wrist. So a cordless (or one with a cord) would help with the task. Why don't I go out to get one? I don't need to and I can't afford it. Being on unemployment and a $150 cell phone bill is why not. Expenses are starting to take it's toll (no pun intended) and my savings and checking are dwindling. But you don't need to hear that. I SHOULD be hearing something by Monday... hopefully. I have two sources, The first source is working 20 hours per week, 10.50 per hour, doing general systems admin, coming in at 9:am to reset passwords, helping people that can't print, good things like that so the main guy can get some work done. Which he is in sales, and just so happens to know something about computers... well guess who gets to be in charge of that. :) Him! So, that's what I'll be doing is expanding what I know and actually doing the keystrokes so I will be able to put on the resume, "I did this." Plus, I am to go in there with the understanding that it may or may not go to a full time position. And, they know that if they do hire me, that I will be looking for a full time position. It is a win-win situation. Not the money, but the experience I am after. The second source is through a recruiter, it's a position for a law firm at the National City Tower. Full time work doing Helpdesk (again) making 30-40k per year and having a chance for promotions. (unlike other companies... ahem) But, it's 9-6 which will severely hamper my LEC Participation on Monday's and Friday's. Who knows, I could work something out on those days! So... we'll hear something about those jobs and I'll keep 'em posted here! Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Squirrel Nut Zippers - The Afterlife (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 13th, 2002
12:50 am	This is completing... and onto the future. Well, it looks like that E* has held up her end of the bargain, she returned my suitcase and I returned her tools. Not a problem, but I wish there was a better way to resolve what went on and what's going on over the past few days/months. I'll get over it, after all, the cards told me so. I also need my DVD back, I almost didn't return the tools for that reason. I also want the book case I bought for her back, or at least Money that she was going to pay me back. $28 would come in handy right about now. If you are wondering what I am talking about, I made a few choice posts that have been restricted to "friends only view" status as to not raise a big stink. My brother likes to call them, "Fart Clouds." I wonder why? So, anyway, onto the future, there's a couple of people I am talking to over the Internet, both locally and some distance away that have a possibility of the "R" word. That's right! We are talking the Relationship track. Looking for a commitment. Looking for love in the voyages of Sinbad. First in line, a little Japanese gentleman from Bloomington. Very cute, very snuggly, he's 30 and LOVES Star Trek (Big plus) and working on his Graduate degree from IU - Bloomington. I find myself holding back, and wanting to go to him at the same time. I need to write him more. And, to keep in touch. He is going back to Japan and then England in a couple of months. But, he is going on Vacation in a couple of weeks, and will be visiting here from school. The second in line is a black gentleman that I don't know that much about. He's 35 and has Sickle Cell Anemia that keeps him from working full time. He is a devout Christian (which kinds irks me) and talks about the "JC" as his lord and savior. This is where I kinda feel wary about. I am pagan, he's Christian. Will it work out? I don't know, but I don't know how to let him down. He seems nice and sincere... and local. He's also not out to his parents. Third in line is some one who answered one of my ads. He 'S 23, in Louisville, and seems nice enough. Although, we were going to meet at Denny's on Eastern Parkway last night, he didn't show up. I am going to give him another chance or two. :) He seems nice enough. Really sweet. He and I met on AOL Chat line (of all places) and we'll see. Well, this weekend, I am going to Cincinnati to supervise another course. I'll have to talk to him later. Current Mood: content Current Music: Blind Melon - Change (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, April 1st, 2002
5:37 pm	Grandmothers Well, the last of my grandparents have passed away 3-22 just before I left on a camping trip. The biggest regret I have is that I was not there for the funeral. I wanted to be there and to be with my family to let them know I was there, and I was ok and there supporting them. She died on Friday, the funeral was Tuesday. The reason I was not at the funeral was that the rental van broke down. The van broke down on Saturday morning and the funeral was on Tuesday. Tuesday, I was on Huntsville, AL replacing the van that broke down and could not attend the funeral. But, my family knows and yet, I don't feel comfort in this. Ah well. I'll be ok. Now to "recover" from the camping trip. I have a tent and tarp drying on my patio, sand in my bath tub, a dryer full of laundry and a full dishwasher. I'll feel better. Current Music: DJ Energy - Future (Nonstop DJ Mix (Comment on this)
5:22 pm	Incomplete Well, so much for THIS idea of using this Live Journal thing for other than a personal rant page. But, here's another "rant" for you. As some of you know, I am the stat-person for the Fall 2001 ILP which has just been completed. We have coaches and a head coach and people like that. I take the numbers from the participants and put them into a report and send them to several people as a completed report. No problem. There were conversations I had about this at some point of time, but there are a few things that I have not been able to 'let go". Or get over. One of these revolves around the reporting of the stats itself. Every Friday, all 20 participants have to have the stats reported by Friday at 6:PM. Well, this does not always happen. Usually the coaches manage this by contacting their participants and sending me the stats. If the participants do not send me their stats, the coaches get a phone call. What IRKS me severely, if I contact the coaches to contact their participants, to get their stats in, the coaches are unreachable. To me, this does not work. Then, I have to hunt down the participants to get their stats in. This would not be a problem for me, but they are all over the country from Louisville, KY to Columbus, OH to Indianapolis, IN. Who I am being is angry and upset for making them wrong in not getting their stats in, and I am also making the coaches wrong on "going on vacation" while I don't have their participants' stats in and being reported. Who you can count on me being is thorough and accurate. That's enough out of me. Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: Mix - Jennifer Lopez, Cher, Effile 65, Vengaboys, Enrique, Santana (dj Chintu Techno Megamix 1999) (Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 6th, 2002
4:04 am	I have been voted off of the island! Good morning! Yes ladies and gentlemen, I have been voted off of the island! Which means, my two roommates have decided that they do not wish for me to renew the lease with them at the end of March. Which I think is a good thing. Don't get me wrong, it sucks that I am not going to live here any more, but at the same time, it's so? freeing, so relaxing, and so? good to finally get this off my chest! It seems like for the past couple of months, there have been several moments of tension between my roommates and I. And, while I am not innocent here, I seem to have been at the heart of it. I don't want to play the victim here and I will try my best not to give you the impression, but it does fall onto equal parts and responsibilities on all three of our parts. In this, I won't mention their names since it's against the TOS of this service to have identifying notes For example, there has been nothing but complaints from D since we have moved in. He wants me to clean my room. He wants me to pick up things off of my floor. Oh, for crying out loud, it's my room, I can do what I want to, when I want to. And this is not the greatest of impressions about him. He's a great roommate, he keeps his things in his room, the music can get a little loud though and when we ask him to turn it down, he does so? most of the time. :) The only beef I have with him is that he knocks at my door in the evening (which is usually closed) and tells me I have to clean. That's it. That, and he has to keep his nose into my affairs and my business. Ah well, not any more! Other than that, no other complaints other than he likes to be sneaky ways he does things without my permission. Like bypassing my router, taking over the "printer duties" of the networked laser printer in the dining room while I am not home for a weekend? things like that. He also sets the furnace to a higher temperature. And, I don't mean high as in turning it up a few degrees, but I mean high as in 75 in the winter. I am more comfortable at a cool 65-68 degrees. You don't turn it up THAT much and expect not to pay for it in utilities. It was $18.00 when we moved in last year, now we are paying almost $40.00 per month for utilities. (I hear my dad talking now) "If you are cold, put something on!" I knock it down to 68 when I notice it. He also teases my cat horribly. Last I saw (on his video camera no less while I was on vacation) he gave my cat one of those Listerine slips that freshens your breath. She didn't know what it was and on that tape, she was foaming at the mouth. I also heard that she panicked. Now, roommate E has his own set of complaints. Since there is a closet that is the biggest in the house, and it was supposed to be our agreement that all three of us were to be using that closet. My argument is that since we were in a hurry to move all of my stuff from the other place, and to put them in my room in a rush, and then roomie D said that they just HAD to be out of the room and out of site, I just stuck them in the closet with the rest of the stuff and left them there with enough room to put some things in the top shelf, and near the door. To me, they lost use of that closet when D tossed in a camping chair into the closet without looking and shut the door and bolted out of my room without a second thought. Now, the bathroom? Well, E and I used to be lovers for about two years and we shared the back bathroom. Going to the bathroom back there, showering and things like that. Separately of course, I would not curse that bathroom on ANYONE! The shower stall is small, to close the door, you need to stand in the commode and it's not a lot of fun to go back there and use the facilities. Anyway, back to my point. E's cats love my room and for some odd reason, when they come into my room, they hork up a hair ball and it winds up all over my carpet. Their favorite game is "Hide-and-go-puke-in-his-room." So, I have my door closed at night to keep them out. Good plan for a while. Well, E's cats also tend to follow him from room to room, his room, the dining room, into the kitchen and living room. One morning when I was still asleep, E was going to take a shower in the bathroom back here, he left the bedroom door open and in followed the notorious puker. If you look at her funny, she horks one up or if you give her one good reason, she horks another one up. I asked him to shut the door to keep the cats out and he got upset with me saying it was hard to keep the cats out while he was in here taking a shower since they are outside the door waiting on him. I wake up later and tinker on my computer while he's still in the shower. He comes out of the shower and has his shampoo, soap and scrubby to the other bathroom. And, his complaint is that he can't use that bathroom. Anyway, onto the next course of action, another apartment! I am working with this apartment complex and wrote them a nice letter requesting assistance. They have been so helpful! Not only have they let me see the apartments that are available, but also they are helping me with the options I have available to me with my limited income. I have a couple of problems: My cat! I will not leave without her. Spoiled rotten as she is, she's still my baby. I am currently unemployed. I have an income of unemployment insurance that I have been using. This is a steady stream of income that meets and exceeds the cost for an apartment, and I don't plan on being unemployed for an extended amount of time, which brings me to the other point. I am searching for employment within Louisville, but I have opened myself up to relocating to Cincinnati, Indianapolis, St. Louis, Dayton and Columbus. The apartment complex has "sister communities" in Cincinnati and Indianapolis and if I get a job up there, I could continue my lease up in these areas and not suffer the breach of lease penalties. The better news is that they are in great parts of the town! The drawback, if I get a location in Dayton, Columbus or St. Louis, I would have to terminate my lease and pay the penalty. I'll live. So, the course of action I am taking is arranging with the apartments to find a new home, pack things up that I don't need and put it into storage. I have a couple of boxes of books and stuff I haven't used in a while and probably not use like a chest and a couple of bookshelves and other things that I probably can take out to the storage facility. I want to be out of here by March 15, this gives me some time to get everything out of here. If I get another place prior to then, I'll start moving stuff into there. But not until then. I'll live! Current Mood: determined Current Music: Cameo - Word Up (Comment on this)
Sunday, December 23rd, 2001
10:31 pm	Not QUITE your holiday spirit.. I know, bah humbug, angel on top of the tree and all that? I know it's not quite my typical holiday spirit, but for me, it's not quite my typical holiday. I have been a bit pissy lately. Shall I run a re-cap? Sure! Why not? 1) Getting laid off Nov 30 has something to do with this... I don't know... it's just a feeling. :) 2) Have not been sleeping well 3) I am out of Anti-depressants, I have been out for the past week 4) Eric has his little weekend fling over here and they do their thing in his room and I hear them. It really hurts to see my ex- have some one else and I don't. You may know what it feels like 5) I don't have funds for the holidays, I can't get anyone anything because I am still unemployed and I don't know when the next time I will have a job. 6) Damien thinks he's my mother or something because when he sees my room, he tells me to clean it. It's my room; I can do what I want to this room any time I want to. If I want it clean or things on the floor, it's not any of his business. I feel like I want to deck him or pin him against the wall and scream at him. At least I feel better Well, the good thing is that I'll be with my family Christmas and the 26th for the holidays. Then the 28th, I will be going to Florida for a much-needed break. Till then. Current Mood: pissed off Current Music: Peter Gabriel - Mercy Street (Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 19th, 2001
3:06 am	Another "you know" coming your way... Another "you know" coming your way? You know? it's times like this that I want to just scream at the top of my lungs and run out of the apartment screaming whatever obscenity that comes to mind. It's times like this I am also glad it's two in the morning and I still have morals about waking the neighbors and the two roomies asleep in the other rooms. I don't know what's going on. Is it depression over loosing my job to the lay-offs? Is it anxiety with suddenly getting too much time on my hands to know what to do with? Is it something to do with the convenience of being able to spend that free time with my parents and grandmother? All three? Well, tonight was a little bit of the last one where I have spent a little too much of that free time with my family. My brother, he's cool. Kind of like a best friend. I may be his best man at his wedding. Who knows? My mother, she's great. And, Dad? he's the way he is. My grandmother, she's dieing of a brain tumor where the doctors have given her 3-24 months to live. And that was six months ago. The dogs, Casey is the gentlest giant you can imagine. Indi, she's getting up in age but still is a good dog. But, during the past several weeks, I have enjoyed the time I spend with my family since I don't see a lot of them unless there is some major planning involved. Tonight was a little TOO much family for me. Dad has a DSL modem he's trying to get hooked up and I spent about an hour on that trying to get it working with no resolve. Upset at that, we took Mom's van and Dad's truck to the VET to have it tested. Both of the vehicles were in and out of the facility within five minutes. I cannot complain about that. In, out, done! But, with trying to get the DSL working on his computer, I can let you know that USB stands for Useless Serial Bus! That was half the problem. Had it been Ethernet, no problem. Here's the rant: Dad has CompuServe on his computer and would like to have it taken off at some point of time. Dad gets the Bell South Internet access DSL for his computers. This is still not a problem. Mom however has been using Dad's Internet access and Dad's e-mail for her personal use. (This is a big no-no for you self-business owners out there whose family members use your computers for personal use) I have been against this from the beginning since mom found out that she can e-mail family members and still get cheaper rates and let everyone know all at once how everyone is doing in the family. Great, huh? The problem is that Dad wants CompuServe taken off, and Mom still had her addresses in there. Great! Now, I need to come up with an e-mail program that Mom can use and Dad can use without the risk of being infected with viruses out there. No problem! Netscape to the Rescue! It's downloaded onto CD and ready to install. No problem! It installs on the computer. No problem. I have an account set up on my domain for mom, for free. No problem. She needs to learn how to use this program. We have a problem. I really want to get this shirt from thinkgeek.com: http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/apparel/388b.shtml (the shirt says, "No, I will not fix your computer) just so I can wear it over to my family's engagements and any other time I go out to some place where there are people that don't know a lot about computers. It's beginning to be uncomfortable with people asking me computer questions all the time. Not that I am complaining too much, but for me, having just got laid off from a job where I was doing it for three years, I need to put myself back into a mind-set to actually troubleshoot or train people. And, I was not in the mind-set to troubleshoot or train today. So, the main thing that was wrong with Mom at this time was that she didn't know how to use Netscape. This program was different than what she was used to. Ok, great, you can adapt, there is the get messages, new message, and address book, SINGLE click on the reply button, don't double click. This is how to add this to here, this is how to reply, be patient, you are running CompuServe and Netscape, and it will be slow. Why are you picking up the phone and talking to some one while I am trying to teach you what to do? Why did you send that e-mail to my uncle whom I don't see but a few times a year stating, "I was cracking the whip over you"? This is why I put on my coat, kissed my grandmother good-bye, yelled downstairs to Dad and rushed out of the house. I just had to leave. Sorry Mom, if you can't work with me, I can't work with you. Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: Single Gun Theory - Words Written Backwards (Comment on this)
Tuesday, December 11th, 2001
2:30 am	If anything could go wrong... Tonight at the seminar was great! If anything could go wrong... it did. But honestly, there are people who know how to manage a breakdown when it happened and had a big hand in making it appear there was nothing wrong. I really must give a hand for the Louisville Landmark Community for being able to pull together for this and make the seminar happen without a hitch. For starters, Theresa calls me and says that she is going to be late and for me to manage getting the seminar room together. Not a problem! We got this handled! The room is together and we need a couple of tables moved, supplies laid out and chairs re-positioned. We can do this every week with our eyes closed. Problem number two: David from Cincinnati calls and says, "Tom's car has broken down and he is actively trying to arrange something and will make every effort to be here on time, have an IL call here to prepare an announcement." Ok, great, no problem. It will be handled. We will have an IL here and an announcement will be made. Sure. Well, Theresa arrives late, we have the room together, she calls David in Cincinnati and finds out more bad news. We know it's not Ron's night to lead since he and Julia swap weeks right? Well, apparently a miscommunication has happened and Julia is not going to lead tonight. Great, no IL, no Tom, let's make sure everything is 'flat' so when Tom DOES come in, he won't have to worry about anything. Theresa makes a few phone calls, she's the IL for the night. No problem. Tom comes in about three minutes till 7 (on time) I clip the mic to him and we clap him up. Perfect timing! The best thing is that other than the ILP and the people who assist, no one else knows a thing in the seminar. We are the incredible inviable stage ninjas! Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Single Gun Theory - Fall (Comment on this)