Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Dr. Samuel Conway's LiveJournal:

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Monday, July 21st, 2008
3:52 pm	Fuel mileage: Europe vs. the USA I keep hearing rumors that cars in Europe get so much better mileage than cars in the USA. I appeal now to my friends in Europe (and elsewhere off of the North American Continent) to answer the following: What country are you currently living in? What is the country of origin of your vehicle? If you drive an American-made SUV, don't bother! How many miles per gallon (or if you prefer, how many kilometers per liter) does your car get on average? What sort of fuel do you put in your car? If your car was a furry animal, what species would it be? (For refrence: KPL = 0.425 * MPG) (85 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, July 20th, 2008
8:29 pm	I am the Little Old Man With The Hat I have always hated to be stuck behind the Little Old Man With The Hat. You know him. He's the one who is afraid to drive more than 20 miles per hour on the interstate. The one who worries that the gas pedal will break off if he steps on it. The one whose turn signal has been on since 1996. Recently I received some advice from my Dear and Sainted Mother. The same lady who, when I was three, gave me the wisdom to "never ride a motorcycle that you can't pick up," told me, "You should keep the tachometer under 2000 RPM if you want to save gas." My mother may be a little behind the times when it comes to technology, but in matters of motor vehicles she is up there with Montgomery Scott. So for the past two months I have been watching my tachometer very carefully. I drive a standard shift car -- never could get the hang of that newfangled automatic transmission -- so it is easy. I shift when the tach hits 2000 RPM, and never let the needle creep above. The trouble is that this leads to extremely slow acceleration. I find that coming off the stop line it can take me as much as a full minute to work up to 50 MPH. The people behind me have been honking furiously, just like I used to do to the Little Old Man With The Hat. Sometimes they go roaring around me and shoot me rude gestures. They are already out of sight while my speedometer creeps gradually up to 20, 25 -- shift now -- 30...35......40........ It takes me longer to get to work in the morning. I've pissed off countless people, even had a few look like they wanted to ram my rear bumper although nobody has tried that yet. But my gas mileage has increased 25% from what it was a few months ago. 32 MPG in April; almost 40 MPG in July. It's like paying $3.00 a gallon for gas. Let them honk. I just tip my hat. (68 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 15th, 2008
7:57 am	Nice to know your efforts are appreciated "Thanks, asshole. Think you could have waited any longer to tell me you had my (item) in your lost and found?" You're welcome, I guess. (81 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, July 14th, 2008
8:15 am	Le quatorze Juillet "Allons enfants de la patrie Le jour de gloire est arrivé..!" (pour nos amis français) (23 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 10th, 2008
7:27 pm	TO THE INDIVIDUAL.... >:( So here I am having a nice dinner at Mom's. I'm here with crux_lo and mongologue who are visiting. We're having such a lovely dinner with Mom and Dad. And then Mom says, "I want to see what's on this CD," and I say, "What CD?" and Mom says, "This CD that the guy gave me at Anthrocon," and I say, "What guy?" and she says, "I don't remember, but he gave me this CD," and I say, "What's on it?" and Mom says, "I don't know," and I say, "We're NOT looking at that CD," and Mom says, "but I want to see what's on it," and I say, "We're ABSOLUTELY NOT LOOKING AT THAT CD AS LONG AS THERE IS BREATH IN MY BODY," so we compromise and we look at the CD, and OH MY GOD!!!!!! And mom is like, "I want to see more," and I'm like, "NO WAI!" and she's like, "Get away, I want to see more," and I'm like, "I'm pulling the plug on this computer!" So to you, who so thoughtfully gave my dear and sainted mother "THAT COMPACT DISK" at Anthrocon: She can't remember your name right now. But I will find out. I will find out indeed. And when I do, remember that I have your address in my records. And I will use that address to hunt you down. And when I have hunted you down, I will do things to you that will take you forty years to die, and you will be screaming for mercy in the first three minutes. (114 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 1st, 2008
1:03 pm	Can't brain today. I got the dumb. We're all done with Anthrocon 2008. Let me know what we can improve for 2009. We strive to make each year's convention better than the last and we count on your feedback to do so. Leave your comments on our forums, please. My mind is not in any shape right now to go searching for people's responses. Also, please do not feel slighted if we do not give you a reply. We read everything, I assure you, but where many of you experience Post Con Depression, we right now are experiencing Post Traumatic Stress, so I ask you to trust that we will give every suggestion consideration and will do what we can to implement those that we feel are workable. (32 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, June 23rd, 2008
7:03 am	Getting tired of saying goodbye Now Carlin. All the people who taught me to make others laugh are going away. And I'm not done learning from them yet. (26 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 12th, 2008
1:53 pm	Speechless Alerted by toob. I had hoped it was a photoshop-job, which would have merely been in poor taste, but apparently it was not. I don't know what to say. (50 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, June 10th, 2008
8:34 am	Impeachable offenses? Now, this is interesting. I'm intrigued by the mention of the White House Iraq Group, which is called WHIG. The Whig Party in the United States was formed in an effort to curb the power of the presidency and to avoid having the United States slip into authoritarian rule. O, Irony. (26 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 8th, 2008
7:24 pm	Anthrocon meme. I loathe memes. But this is one I think I have to do. Kicks to bigbluefox. Where will you be most of the time during the day/s? Everywhere. At once. Where are you staying? In the Westin. Don't wake me up. Who will you be with? Everyone who attends. Do you do free art? Uhhhh, yes, I suppose, if you can catch me. But you won't like the results. I can't draw. Do you do trades? No, I'm selfish. Do you do commissions? If you want to commission me to run a convention, my rates are negotiable, but in all cases exorbitant. Do you have prints/ CDs ? I have fingerprints. And there's a few Steeleye Span CD's in my car. Do you do badges? Uh...not really, no. What is your gender? Male. How old are you? 1.357 e+9 seconds, approximately. Can I touch you? I am very approachable, but remember two things: (1) always let me see you coming, if you don't want to get an elbow in your solar plexus, and (2) no bearhugs. I have a rib that never quite healed from an eager fan who gave me a powerful bearhug years ago, and if you try to hug me too tightly I may become upset. Can I talk to you? Absolutely! But here, too, are some things to remember: (1) There will be a radio in my ear at all times. If you are talking to me and I suddenly excuse myself and run away, it is not because I don't enjoy talking to you. It is because something horrible is happening that needs my attention. (2) In general, if I am walking very, very fast, it means that I'm on my way to attend to something horrible, and if you say hello to me, I'm liable to wave briefly and keep again. Again, please do not take offense. It is the job. (3) If I am walking slowly and not looking like something horrible is being whispered into my ear, then please feel free to talk to me, but be advised that I will not remember you or the conversation after the convention. Again, please to not take it personally. This is something that I've noticed after ten years in the business: I have no physical memory of anything that happens at Anthrocon unless it gives me trouble; thus, if I do remember talking to you afterward, it is probably not a good thing. (18 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, June 2nd, 2008
9:31 pm	Monsters vs. Aliens 1) Yes, I know. 2) Yes, I intend to see it when it comes out. 3) No, I'm sure it's just an amusing coincidence. (19 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 29th, 2008
8:07 pm	Another farewell Harvey Korman, 1927-2008. The comedy world has lost one of its finest straight-men. (18 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 26th, 2008
11:16 am	Happy Memorial Day! FESTIVE HOLIDAY PASTA SALAD 2 cups uncooked farfalle (bow-tie) pasta (4 ounces) 2 cups broccoli florets 2 medium tomatoes, chopped (1 1/2 cups) 1 medium yellow bell pepper, chopped (1 cup) 1/3 cup diced red onion 1 cup mayonnaise or salad dressing 1/2 cup plain yogurt 2 tablespoons sugar 1/2 teaspoon curry powder 1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese (6 ounces) 1 tablespoon Betty Crocker® Bac~Os® bacon flavor bits or chips 2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh parsley 1. Cook and drain pasta as directed on package. Place broccoli in boiling water. Cover and cook 1 minute; drain. Immediately rinse with cold water; drain. 2. While pasta is cooking, layer tomatoes, broccoli, bell pepper and onion in 2-quart glass serving bowl. 3. In medium bowl, mix mayonnaise, yogurt, sugar and curry powder. Stir in pasta. Layer pasta evenly over onion in serving bowl. 4. Sprinkle with cheese. Top with bacon bits and parsley. Cover and refrigerate. (22 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 23rd, 2008
8:35 am	5 weeks It's around this time of year that my sense of humor completely abandons me. Oddly enough, the convention-anxiety dreams have started late this year. Last night was the first real one. In it, my radio was going wild with one panicked voice after another shouting, "where is Kage? Does anyone know where Kage is?" And of course with so much traffic I could not get a response in edgewise. Apparently I had to be somewhere but had no idea where to be and couldn't break in to all the excited traffic to inquire. When I woke up I stalked to the computer and was starting to send an angry email to the staff reminding them that radio communications need to be kept short (10 seconds at maximum) before I was able to remind myself that it had all been a dream. That's how it starts. (26 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 20th, 2008
8:16 am	A rant, ganked from Triggur Triggur reported: So Gary tutors kids in math. A 9th grade kid came to him with a story problem he didn't know how to solve: "A ball is dropped [assume earth here] and it takes 10 seconds to hit the ground. From what height was it dropped?" Knowing roughly where these kids were at in their schooling, Gary hemmed and hawed and asked the kid if the teacher had given him a formula to use. The teacher had not. Another (very competent) teacher agreed that the kid hadn't been given enough information to know how to solve the problem. Gary told the kid that really there needs to be an integral, and does he know what that means? No. He sent the kid back to the teacher to get more information, and the teacher sent him back with the following: "Gravity is 9.8. So the answer is 9.8 * 10." I'm going to feel these words rising in my gorge the next time I hear about teachers protesting any plans that require them to take proficiency exams. (For the non-scientists out there, not only is the formula wrong, it is so wrong as to be idiotic.) (87 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 14th, 2008
10:50 pm	Pictures from my visit to Japan I finally wrestled Flickr into something resembling submission. Photos may be found here. If you click on the first photo, there'll be a little box on the right entitled "Japan 2008 (set)" where you can click on the next picture along to step through. Bedtime now. Oyasumi nasai! (24 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 12th, 2008
10:11 pm	My Friend Flickr Actually, not my friend at all. giza had been pestering me to use Flickr instead of captioning all of my trip photos and then uploading them by hand and writing HTML to navigate them. I decided to give it a try with my Japan photos, all 450 of them. I downloaded the "Flickr Uploadr," which claimed to make things oh-so-easy, and set to work. It was a fairly nice interface. It let you arrange all the photos, rotate them, make minor adjustments, put captions on them, and then it's supposed to upload everything in one big batch to your Flickr account. It said that I had up to 100 MB to play with, and the total size of the entire photo set was only 95 MB. I spent several hours doing all of that, and then I clicked the big "upload now" button. It chugged away, counting up 1/450, 2/450, 3/450, all the way up to 160/450, and then abruptly it said "DONE!" and all the photos vanished from the Uploadr window. I checked my Flickr account and found: 1) Only 75 photos had actually been uploaded 2) Some went into the set "Japan 2008" I had created. Some went into a set with a duplicate title. Others didn't go into any set at all. 3) The remaining 375 photos were gone from the Uploadr window entirely, along with all the adjustments and captions I'd made for them. I really don't like Flickr. (24 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, April 25th, 2008
1:08 pm	This is where my stories come from The plan: Fly from Seattle to San Francisco, connect to a flight to Seoul, connect to another flight to Tokyo. The challenge: hydraulic leak in Seattle. Plane grounded. No other flights available. More to come if I'm not arrested. (31 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008
8:29 am	Another idiotic meme Everyone's doing it. Peer pressure. My Personality Neuroticism 98 Extraversion 97 Openness to Experience 42 Agreeableness 61 Conscientiousness 2 You are not generally self conscious about yourself, however you feel strong cravings and urges that you have difficulty resisting. You tend to prefer short-term pleasures and rewards over long-term consequences. You have a generally cheerful disposition. You prefer dealing with either people or things rather than ideas. You regard intellectual exercises as a waste of your time. You find helping other people genuinely rewarding and are generally willing to assist those who are in need. You find that doing things for others is a form of self-fulfillment rather than self-sacrifice, however you are not adverse to confrontation and will sometimes even intimidate others to get your own way. You have a strong sense of duty and obligation, and feel a moral obligation to do the right thing. Take a Personality Test now or view the full Personality Report. The best ugg Boots. Seems I just missed a perfect score on the neurotic end. (13 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, April 18th, 2008
10:26 am	You know the rest, from the books you have read... But who hung the lanterns? (16 Comments |Comment on this)