| how very unpleasant |
[Jun. 30th, 2003|03:04 pm] |
Since you ask, I have been under a lot of stress since I went from contract to full time, thank you. The last few days have been especially unpleasant on the work front. I think it is knocking me somewhat off my spindle. I apologize for any and all stupid comments, and I have deleted an egregious example.
Kat and I engaged in a psychological exercise this weekend and I think in conjunction with work stress it may be having a destabilizing impact on my consciousness. I note this by noting a higher rate of mistakes in issues that have become politicized or emotionally charged, and a reduction in useful social inhibitions.
I also find myself wishing to bathe again, which could mean a number of different things, from the need to relax my muscles to a feeling of inner stain. Bathing is not a desire I often resist, and so I have now bathed. For some reason -- I don't know why, but perhaps it will be obvious to everyone else -- I feel the need to post this. ( Read more... ) |
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| up-mod of the day |
[Jun. 29th, 2003|05:52 pm] |
For some reason I'm always pleased to get modded up to 5 on /.. Since I'm no fan of open source software in general, taking the fight to the beast's lair and emerging victorious is very rewarding -- much like, say, being scorned for years as a crackpot firebrand, sticking to my guns, and finding my perspectives and ideas on the lips of the next generation of leaders.
Of course, the latter is just a hypothetical and could never happen in real life.... |
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| email of the day |
[Jun. 29th, 2003|05:42 pm] |
As I have only skimmed your site its hard to say what your position is but I am constantly surprised to meet OTO people who are entirely wrapped up in the propaganda of the order.
Two points - 1) The OTO is the Outer Order. 2) After turning the OTO into his Thelemic propaganda machine, Crowley set up the A.:A:. because I believe he knew that OTO was an old aeon hierarchical conception and he was happy to have a propaganda machine promulgating his word. He knew he couldn't change it so he made it work as best he could to serve his purpose and then set up the A.:A:..
And so on. Just so you'll know, friend, Crowley didn't join the OTO until years after he created the A.'. A.'. And I am about as much a propagandist for the OTO as Michael Moore is a spokesman for K-Mart. |
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| smarter than the average goals |
[May. 27th, 2003|03:48 pm] |
Today I read ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) keith418's pieces on SMART goals for the OTO. The SMART formula seems workable enough, although I am always wary of smarmy, over-marketed planning models. We might ask why we should concentrate on goals and strategy rather than on requirements, whether a matrix organization or a traditional hierarchy would better fit the organizational goals, or whether specific process and workflow models from business could be useful to us, rather than focusing on the SMART framework, which bears on a limited domain. But many organizations including the OTO do have problems that could be addressed through this model, so it seems like a reasonable starting point for discussion. ( Read more... ) |
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| train wreck |
[May. 27th, 2003|12:36 pm] |
What is it that makes watching a train wreck so fascinating, so that even though we are ashamed of ourselves, we can't tear our eyes away, and only wish it had the decency not to occur in front of us and face us with this impossible choice?
I think perhaps it is that on some primal level we tag the information as important. There is a compulsion to absorb it, to take advantage of a rare opportunity to see - what? A vision of your own end, perhaps? A comprehension of the depth of misery to which the world can abruptly sink? Escape routes to store away for later use?
Perhaps it is simply that it is a peek through the manufactured and peaceful world to a kind of reality that seems firmer and more fundamental. This world is physical. I am made of thinking meat. It could be turned to hamburger in an instant, or some sudden neurological glitch could turn the thinking part psychotic, or aphasic, or violent, or, again, simply dead. Everything we construct ourselves to be in our identities and in our society is transcended in the train wreck. How could we not be transfixed? |
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| open source as unpleasant subculture |
[May. 26th, 2003|12:56 pm] |
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A /. story led me to the archives of the Linux kernel mailing list. In this I am reminded of one personal reason I have never been attracted to the Free Software or Open Source ideology. It requires a major lifestyle commitment which involves the company of unpleasant people, as a quick browse through those archives will demonstrate. ( Read more... ) |
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| 666 on freedom of thought |
[May. 23rd, 2003|01:42 am] |
De Libertate Mentis (from Liber Aleph)
There shall be no property in Human Thought. Let each think as he will concerning the Universe; but let none seek to impose that Thought upon another by any Threat of Penalty in this World or any other World.... I charge thee therefore that thou permit none to tyrannize any other in Thought, or to threaten, or in any other wise to blaspheme the great Liberty of Our Father the Sun in the Grand Cosmos, or of His Viceregent in the Little. |
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| non-depleted uranium in afghani urine |
[May. 22nd, 2003|12:52 pm] |
Afghans' uranium levels spark alert - By Alex Kirby, BBC News Online
A small sample of Afghan civilians have shown "astonishing" levels of uranium in their urine, an independent scientist says....
But he found no trace of the depleted uranium (DU) some scientists believe is implicated in Gulf War syndrome.
Other researchers suggest new types of radioactive weapons may have been used in Afghanistan.... ( Read more... ) |
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| lies on play and whim |
[May. 21st, 2003|05:35 pm] |
Broomstick-Babblings (from The Book of Lies)
FRATER PERDURABO is of the Sanhedrim of the Sabbath, say men; He is the Old Goat himself, say women.
Therefore do all adore him; the more they detest him the more they adore him.
Ay! let us offer the Obscene Kiss!
Let us seek the Mystery of the Gnarled Oak, and of the Glacier Torrent!
To him let us offer up our babes! Around Him let us dance in the mad moonlight
But FRATER PERDURABO is nothing but AN EYE; what eye none knoweth.
Skip, witches! Hop, toads! Take your pleasure! - for the play of the Universe is the pleasure of FRATER PERDURABO
in paragraph 7 (Skip, witches) is seen the meaning of the chapter; the obscene and distorted character of much of the universe is a whim... |
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| a fruit basket and card |
[May. 21st, 2003|03:56 pm] |
From my new employer. How nice. The sweatshirt is incredibly boring, though.
I will be going to San Jose on Jun 2 for orientation. That lasts from morning until evening on Monday, and half the day on Tuesday. At that length it has better be good. If people try to make me do "I'm a little teacup" participation exercises I just stare at them until they call on the next person.
I had to work a half day today on an urgent bug today despite being on vacation.
I'm about to begin writing on file cards and spreading them around in various arrangements. If you know me you know what that means. Or maybe you don't. It's a simple technique for bringing order to a sprawling subject domain. Many cards are set aside. Some are rewritten again & again. Some never change. Many have additional notes attached. They are put in piles and then taken out or copied into other piles. The result is a draft outline.
I am also considering bringing the Yi and/or Tarot oe bear on my side writing project. I don't usually do that but in this case I have a feeling it just may work. The problem space there has a few great and solid pillars within it, but bridges are not as yet woven across the abysses between them. The Tarot might be superior for this project given its imagistic quality and that the end result would be in a visual medium. Personally I tend to favor the Yi.
I have a few other side projects that I want to get to the two-page treatment level before I have to put on the shirt. I'm not too worried yet, although of course, I haven't yet gotten as far as I'd hoped.
Addendum. 4:18PM. My four-figure tax refund check has finally arrived, as I broke open the new deck and laid the new pen upon the cards. I think I will take a quick trip to the bank. Quite a change from being in the red since last week! And tomorrow I get paid for two weeks of overtime, my last automatic deposit as a contractor. |
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| chimpanzees - genus homo? |
[May. 19th, 2003|11:26 pm] |
Chimps May Have Closer Links to Humans
Humans and chimps share 99.4 percent of DNA -- genetic code for life -- according to a team led by Morris Goodman of the Wayne State University School of Medicine.
"We humans appear as only slightly remodeled chimpanzee-like apes," said Goodman.
The study, published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Science, proposes that chimps be added to the genus Homo, currently reserved only for humans.
"Some day we'll live on Venus. Men will walk on Mars. But we will still be monkeys, down deep inside." - David Byrne, "Facts of Life" |
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| today's quasi-thelemic song lyric post |
[May. 19th, 2003|11:01 pm] |
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"It's your motherfuckin' world. Do what you like." -- Lil' Kim |
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| the best thing about being priest... |
[May. 18th, 2003|12:12 pm] |
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... is not having to say the Creed. What a load of old cobblers that thing is. |
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| the machines are boring |
[May. 18th, 2003|11:22 am] |
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(However, the theatre in Orinda was nice -- thanks to bellacrow for the tip!) |
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| another twelve hour day |
[Mar. 27th, 2003|09:11 pm] |
We have a big push on the software front. I anticipated it a couple of months ago and tried to head it off, but my warnings were not heeded, and so now milestones are slipping and people are working crazy hours. That includes me. The upside? I'm a contractor, and I get paid by the hour. The downside: I will become an exempt employee soon, because in this climate I need the job security. Then I can put in sixty hour weeks and not get any overtime.
People are making brilliant comments in a few recent entries. I have time to read them at a rapid clip as the email notifications come in, and no time to respond to them properly. Maybe tomorrow, with luck.
Oh yes, there's a very good chance that Kat and I will be able to get to Austin for the Io Pan Jam and New Orleans for the Jazz Festival! I'm going to take off two weeks between contracting and slavery -- I mean, exempt employmentt. We might even be able to get to the parties leading up to the Jam. |
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| "Don't fly more humans than you have to" |
[Mar. 25th, 2003|07:48 pm] |
The solution to the unreliability of the space shuttle?
Simple -- try to minimize casualties by keeping people off that godforsaken deathtrap.
This is not just my snarky observation, but the recommendation of the former commander of the space division of the Air Force Systems Command to the Columbia Accident Investigation Board.
NASA may have to live with a risk factor of two catastrophes for every 113 shuttle flights, so it should limit its crew size and use robots and unmanned rockets whenever possible, a missile and rocket expert [Aloysius Casey] said Tuesday....
Steven Wallace, a board member in charge of accident investigations for the Federal Aviation Administration, suggested that a reliability level of 98 percent would not suffice for commercial airlines.
"In 2000, we operated 11 million flights, 32,000 a day and without a single fatality," Wallace said. "Operating on this level of reliability, we would lose 640 of those airplanes every day." |
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| jihad: war against the infidel |
[Mar. 25th, 2003|04:05 pm] |
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CNN radio is repeating a short piece claiming that "jihad" does not mean "holy war" and that Islam is a peaceful religion. I have no doubt that the numerous media reports to this effect are well-meaning and meant to counter rampant and spreading anti-Muslim bigotry. Nor do I have any desire to provide ammunition to those who ignorantly defame Islam, but in fact Islam is not historically a peaceful religion and "jihad" does traditionally mean a holy war carried out to bring a land of unbelievers under Islamic control. Every religion has its warts and jihad is one of Islam's greatest failings from a human rights perspective. ( Read more... ) |
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