i think roommates might be the worst thing that ever happened to me. HELP!

tyra's italian accent totally sounds jamaican hahhahha

i hate when i get woken up by my rooommates being really loud. i'll get cranky (i HATE being woken up when i don't want/need to do it), finally accept that i'm awake and can't get back to sleep, then like minutes later they'll be out of the house and gone, and i'm left wide awake. once i'm awake, its almost impossible for me to get back to sleep. so stupid!!!

i was up past 5am trying to get to stupid sleep. i took some melatonin and smoked a little to help me get sleepy, but nothing! i guess its better that i didn't sleep really late so i won't have a harder time sleeping tonight...

i want mitchell to come home :(

i have a new boyfriend!! his name is mitchell and we're in love and its so crazy. we've been dating for about 2 months and i could not be happier. he's on tour with his brother's band right now for a week and i am DYING! he is too, hahah. we talk everyday and all we can say is "i miss you" & "i love you" hahahah its really nice to feel like this about someone again, but even more so than ever before. its really nice to have someone feel the same way about me, and express it to me all the time. i've never felt this much love toward anyone before. i can't believe how happy he makes me feel and how much i really love him. come home mitchell!!! i'm terribly sad without him around :(

school started last week and its pretty good. i'm taking: religions of the world, american studies, reasoning & problem solving, and evolution & creationism. they're all really interesting classes and all of my professors are incredibly nice and teach in a clear and concise way. i've been riding my bike to school which has been pretty rad!! it takes like 20 minutes from my house to school, park my bike and be sitting in class. plus i'm saving $150 bucks cause i don't need a parking permit! i'll probably end up buying one when it starts to get colder and rainy, but at least by then the price will be discounted.

alright i have to pee really bad and i'm supposed to go to joanne's house. i'll write more later!!

i miss you livejournal!

brian and i broke up :(

i guess it just didn't work anymore. i was willing to stay and work through it, but he gave up and so i agreed. i've never felt so lonely and anytime i'm by myself my anxiety sky rockets. i just really need to be around people right now and get my mind off things. i'm trying so hard to accept everything that's happening, but i just fucking miss him so much. its heart breaking, really.

summer has never sounded so good.

i've been having a really terrible time lately. anxiety, depression and panic attacks. blegh. everyday i have to drag myself out of bed and spend all day convincing myself to do what i'm supposed to be doing. i need groceries but i can't get myself to go to the store. i need to deposit my paycheck, but can't seem to get to the bank. i have a paper due tomorrow and i haven't started writing it yet. i'm trying though, and i know i'll get through this. i always do.

so, thursday night/friday morning someone broke into my car and stole: my ipod, my radio/cd player, all my cds, my skateboard and my pogo stick!! WTF DICKS?! who does that? my dad is gonna get me a new ipod, which is very nice, but the one the assholes stole was the one brian gave me and it was inscribed and i'll never fucking see it again. AND all my cds! i've had some of those since i was 12! i am so mad. the radio i could care less about because i can replace that. i have to take the money out of my savings, but i had no emotional attachment to it, so whatever. OH and they took the half bottle of vodka that was in my trunk for party emergencies. i can only imagine some druggy skating away on my skateboard, taking shots of vodka and being all pumped on all the drugs he'll buy. dick.

in other news, i've been a huge stressball lately. school caught up to me and was like YOU HAVE TO DO ALL THIS WORK EVEN THOUGH YOU DONT WANT TO, and i cried a little, and then had some beers and some cigarettes and did it. stupid.

so far this week has been pretty good. on friday my dad is taking me to get some cooking supplies so i can get down to business with my new cookbook and make some gourmet shit. i cant wait!

anjie had her baby, adeline, today. 9 lbs 6 oz! she looks just like mark, hahah. um...

alright i'm gonna go to bed and watch the real housewives of new york or whatever it is.

bye, dudes.

multigrain bread with hummus, basil, tomato & cucumber with a little sea salt and fresh ground pepper. i took a bite because i couldn't resist! hahah so easy and so delicious!! i accompanied my sammich with salt & vinegar chips, yuuuuum.

i took the day off work today so i could study and get some homework done. i've been procrastinating so bad lately and i need to catch up and keep up with everything going on. i want good grades!

i bought so much delicious food yesterday, so more yummy food pictures to come. i'm gonna make snobby joes and chickpea cutlets with mustard sauce next (from veganomicon). OH! anja, i found BATTER BLASTER! that pancake in a can stuff hahhah. i was at henry's farmers market and i was just browsing in the refrigerated section and it was like a light shown down from the heaven's. i was so excited! hahah i can't wait to make some pancakes!

i stopped drinking bottled water a few weeks ago and today i bought a smartwater at the grocery store and it is SO GROSS. it just tastes like plastic. i used to drink only bottled water, and it is so weird to taste the plastic now. i spent my whole life drinking that shit. GROSSSSSS

also, i stopped washing my face and it is a miracle! i still got my pre-period zits, but they went away so quickly and my skin feels so good and i'm amazed.

i wanna tell everyone i see about all this stuff! i just love trying out these new things that i'm learning about and seeing them work, and knowing that it is so much better for me. i feel so good, man.

tonight i gotta study for my sociology midterm (shits weak!) and i wanna clean my room. i want to go grocery shopping and get some new kicks. so much to do, so little time!

p.s. i mailed my netflix movies back on monday and they still haven't received them!! i wanna watch the rest of big love! boooo

last night i made my first recipe from veganomicon: tomato-rice soup with roasted garlic and navy beans. IT IS SO GOOD! i invited jake and meagan over to help me eat some of it and they were amazed too. i love making delicious food and then people telling me i'm a good cook. it rules. i also made a pizza using pizza dough from trader joes. i put marinara sauce, eggplant, artichoke hearts and red onion on it. we dipped the pizza in the soup hahha. oh man!

here's what i just made for dinner right now:

brown rice pasta with marinara sauce, chick peas and roasted brussel sprouts. so good! i'll eat half for lunch tomorrow. food food food.

i wanna make so many more recipes! if only i had infinite money and time.

alright i gotta go paint a still life for class tomorrow, drink beer and watch movies. sounds pretty good, but the painting will take hours and i will complain and think about how much i can't wait to go to sleep. hahha

peace out, fools.