Current mood:	cranky
Entry tags:	gay rights, meta, rants

Slash and gay rights
So, like, I watch sports and stuff? And I really love watching football and I spend all my time talking about football and enjoying football games on TV and playing football games on my Playstation because, like, football gets me hot. But, like, if you actually play football? Dude, that's, like, sick and wrong and I think there should be laws that say nobody should ever actually play football 'cause people who would actually, like, do that thing of wearing pads and helmets and chasing a ball around a field goes against everything law and humanity stands for. I mean dude, what's wrong with you?



Look, let's get one thing clear: TBQ's law of slash applies to both sides of the fence. You don't have to flash your queer cred in order to say you don't like slash. Neither do you have to flash your queer cred in order to like it. Slash, in and of itself, isn't a political movement, it's not an effort to make a statement or try to subvert the status quo of anything. It's fanfic. About characters we want to see together, very often in some form of undress. It's not the cure for cancer and it's never gonna be. Also? Anybody who thinks I'm movitated to write slash based on reasons beyond "Wes and Angel together are teh HAWT" clearly doesn't know me that well, or read my stuff. (Both of which are fine states, for the record.)

However - the question has arisen of whether or not being a slash fan yet being firmly against the rights of gays to marry makes one a hypocrite. Allow me to offer an answer to this question: I don't know if it makes you a hypocrite, but it sure as hell makes you an asshole. You know why? Because telling gay people that they're less than human is a shitty thing to do.

Look, I'm there for you guys. I try to be there for you guys. I'm down with the religious reasons and the ignorance (NOTE: religious reasons and ignorance are not the same thing nor am I suggesting they are) and the geniune worry over What! About! The children! but when it all boils down what you're saying is that I'm not a human being and you are and you know what? For some odd reason I don't take that as a compliment.

Now the slash thing makes it all kinds of interesting. Because yeah, slash isn't necessarily about politics. Slash can just be about two guys getting it on because that makes your panties wet. Go for it! Have at! I'm right there with you! I mean heck, as others have said it's just like those great little psuedo-porn films on Skinemax which, when you get right down to it, should be called "Two women with really bad boob jobs pretend to eat each other out because that kind of thing gets some members of our audience really hot inside of their 501s." Nothing wrong with that if you ask me! Hell, obviously I've watched some myself! I wish the boob jobs would be less obvious!

And sure, your stereotypical guy watching The Bare Wench Project IV is probably not watching said cinematic masterpiece because deep down he cares about whether or not two women who have sex with each other in the real world would actually have the rights to adopt and raise a child together without both of them having to deny everything about themselves in order to be considered worthy to raise a child that nobody else wanted in the first place. No more than you might read about Lex and Clark going at it in a hidden corner of the barn and give a rat's ass if an actual real life Clark would be given the legal right to visit Lex in the hospital if he was dying from one of the five billion car crashes and accidents he gets into on an average day in Smallville. And you don't have to. I promise, wearing a rainbow pin and marching in gay pride is not a requirement for enjoying the watching of gay sex.

But not supporting gay rights while still gaining some form of amusement from any form of homosexuality still makes you an asshole.

Slash fan who doesn't support civil rights for queers? Asshole. Frat boys who love watching the Bare Wenches get it on but who would spit at an actual dyke if they met her on campus? Asshole. Random TV viewer who thinks the Fab Five are a 'hoot' but would still vote to support a constitutional amendment to make sure that Ted and his boyfriend of many years could never get married? Asshole.

'cause here's the thing: You don't get to make homosexuality dance for your amusement and then say "Oh by the way I still think you're sub-human. But ta for the laughs and the orgasms!"

Christ, how rude is that? And somebody actually had to explain how rude is that? And other people still didn't get it? Did I wake up and it was opposite day or something? Newsflash: you don't get to like us as entertainment then vomit all over us in reality. Or at least you shouldn't. Not if you had a shred of decency in you.

"But wait!" the argument goes, as I've seen it played out in a few LJs now, "What about bestiality? What about pedophilia? What about murder and torture and incest and more? If you want slash fans to support gay rights, shouldn't you want those who read rapefic to support rapists?"

And hey - I am down with debate and argument. So I'm more than happy to take the time to give you my reply:

What the Hell is wrong with you?

Seriously. No, seriously. This is your "A" game? "I don't see the difference between homosexuality and beastiality" is your A game? What, were the better debators on your team sick today? And you actually want an answer to that?

You want an answer? Fine. Come close and listen up because I'm not going to repeat myself. And lemme tell you I'm giving this one to everybody who EVER trots out that pedophilia/bestiality/rape/whatever/oh my argument in response to the gay rights issue because I am sick and tired of dealing with this every. single. time. This is your answer, you get it once, and then I never wanna hear it again:

TAKE YOUR ASS BACK TO KINDERGARTEN, RETAKE REMEDIAL "ONE OF THESE THINGS IS NOT LIKE THE FUCKING OTHERS" AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU KNOW HOW TO ARGUE LOGIC LIKE A GOD-DAMNED GROWNUP, GOT IT?

Jesus Christ people! I am so over this it's not even funny. You know why? Because every time it comes up somebody on my side has to trot themselves out and go "Oh no, gay rights isn't like rape/murder/pedophilia because of consent and laws and love and blah and blah and BLAH" and I am so GOD DAMNED TIRED OF IT. If you, sunshine, can't tell the difference between faggots and dog-fucking then get your ass OFF the debate floor and let the big boys play. 'cause I ain't here to coddle you.

You don't like queers? Fine. Think we're going to Hell? Super! Find gay sex to be teh HAWT but think actual fags aren't human beings and will do what you can to make sure we live our lives as second-class citizens? Bite me. Bite me hard. That's a shitty attitude to have and believe you me I'm never going to respect you for it.

But hey, apparently you can't see the difference between me and a Cocker Spaniel, so I guess it's not really breaking your heart that we're not BFF. Oh well.

Yours etc,
TBitchQ