| argh |
[May. 13th, 2008|11:33 am] |
im wicked sick right now and I can't concentrate. And I have to take my german final
On the bright side...the concert last night was lovely (with the exception of me crying for like the first 3-4 songs and looking like a blood shot crackhead). They played my song and I had way too many squee moments over Robert Smith.
That being said, my Robert Smith (the sago palm) is doin' crapily.
gonna try to piece my brain together and shower now.
PS I got to the second row. And my camera phone sucks so it looks like i was like 16 rows back. |
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| Cripes! |
[May. 8th, 2008|03:51 pm] |
I'm really sabotaging myself this semester.
I've been getting sick left and right most likely because I'm so stressed and never sleep... but I can't sleep because I've been having such wretched dreams lately! Argh!
I can't wait for my storage pod to get here tomorrow so i can just move EVERYTHING out of my room and have a billion fewer things to worry about.
I can't concentrate o n my paper until then :(
And studying for German? Oh my goodness, please, don't even ask.
Hopefully Tribal Fest will be nice, fun and relaxing, and I hope to goodness that I won't be fucking exhausted like last year (where I had to just plain walk out of Mardi's class because I was so fucking exhausted and had to go sleep in the car during the after party).
I have my German oral in a few minutes (no idea when exactly, the prof didn't post the schedule anywhere, so I may be sitting in front of his damn office for a whole hour).
All I know is that I am 4 something.
Ugh and I'm stressed out about my personal life. I feel like someone is avoiding me which is not the thing to do when problems are brought to the forefront! We have been discussing a lot of crap lately and I feel like now's the time to work on the problems brought forth. I also am afraid I may have been a bit too scary or something :S
I should stop caring so much, I really should.
Monday I am gonna go talk to the Dean again <3 hooray. And in the evening I will see The Cure <3 hooray!!!!
And then follows a fabulous month of concerts and bellydance and (hopefully fun and not douchey) Bay area ness.
Did I bitch about my really bad performance last week?
Ugh it was so embarassing. I was still getting over the whole MY STOMACH SUCKS thing and I was not feeling it. I fell out of my standing backbend and lost my spot when turning :|
At least my hair/make up/costume kicked ass!
I also think I weirded people out. Blah, so I'm not Shakira...at least I didn't do the Neubauten set, I think that would have sent them into psyduck orbit.
and here is a picture of said horrendous back bend incident. only pic i have of that night...with the exception of the LOLZ bathroom one which is my mainpic on my dance myspace now.
i think that was like half way down, i was doing one of those stop motiony kind of ones.
I know i can do better (refer to my gothla pics :P).
oh x mortis tomorrow... should I go? hm. |
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| oh no! |
[May. 8th, 2008|12:24 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Solace- Sleeping Sober (narcotica mix) | ] |
I would like to know why Little Robert Smith (my Sago Palm) decides to turn yellow and die-y and scary right before i actually see the real Robert Smith.
I think its conspiracy!
He looks like he has new growth (YAY) but hes all yeller. Hes been sucking up water at an atrocious rate. I'm taking him to the greenhouse tomorrow to see if anyone can give me the haps. I may also ask if they have extra potting soil because maybe he needs to be taken out of his teeny little garden center pot and placed into the nice big red glass pot i initially bought for him.
Buck up, Robbie!
oh, and I need suggestions for a burlesque name.
I'm not good at thinking sexy... although just plain tacky like BUNNY MUFF or CATHERIN COURTESANNE may work. After all it is burlesque.
and now I shall work on my paper which was due today and not done, it is douchily named "ACROSS LOOMS AND OCEANS: Cross Cultural Influences in Meiji Fashion".
Epig BWONG. |
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| jesus christ. |
[May. 5th, 2008|11:25 am] |
So I slaved away all weekend to finish up the requirements for my portfolio for Chinese Painting.
All i was missing were the two landscapes i made for class a couple weeks ago which were posted in the hallway. After German I decided to stop by the class room to pick them up so i could add any finishing touches or whatever before class.
Unfortunately they were not there.
Why ANYONE would want my ugly, teeny, poorly painted landscape of rocks and twigs is seriously BEYOND ME. But it still infuriates me because i thought I could move on from painting after i finished my new compositions this weekend, BUT NOW I HAVE TO MAKE TWO MORE. I spoke with the prof and we combed the classroom but found nothin. He said he could give me another week to do them, which I will gratefully take but when i present what i HAVE of my portfolio, I am going to ask if anyone has mine.
If i SEE anything that resembles my two paintings...there will be blood. |
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| Loose Ends |
[May. 2nd, 2008|12:46 pm] |
So I've been sick for the past week, which basically means sitting in bed. I had a crappy performance yesterday and I'm guessing my sickness is partially to blame but I really feel I was unprepared. Whatever, you take the bad ones with the good ones, righto?
Last night i had a wonderful conversation with Cristina which felt like, I was you know, actually discussing pertinent issues that aren't commonly parroted and you know, things people generally overlook (so not the whole OMG BUSH SUCKS or THE ECONOMY SUCKS argument that everyone knows about). It was refreshing. Another refreshing part of it was the feedback. It wasn't a thing where someone would say here is my opinion and the next person would go well, here is my opinion and then it would just end. It was an actual dialog.
We also had really yummy food.
The past week or so I have been obsessing over this Fosse choreography for the Hot Honey Rag from Chicago. My goodness, it's magic...and I am learning it. I don't know why I am learning it, maybe for self satisfaction, or to say "This dance is so awesome AND I CAN DO IT!" but yeah. I'm amazed at how quickly I can learn choreographies now... see what dancing does? I wish my memory was better in other aspects though.
In other news, a local burlesque troupe is having auditions, and by golly I am TEMPTED. I've wanted to do this since way before when, blame my grandpa, blame my glittery well-jeweled big haired mother. But the deal is whether or not it's you know ~*acceptable*~. I've pretty much had it with acceptable though and have been looking at materials for costume ideas :P
so yup. that's all for now. My shift's about to end anyways and i need to crawl back to my room and get my moms mother's day card to mail off.
oh... and waiting for the arrival of my MAC pro card is KILLIN' me. |
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| I want... |
[Apr. 29th, 2008|02:57 pm] |
Massive Sally Rand fans.
After I get my mac card... I am so saving up for a pair of these babies. |
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| Hey, sailor! |
[Apr. 23rd, 2008|01:47 am] |
aggh!
The new mac collection (Naughty Nauticals) is now rumored to be coming out on the 24th, a whole week earlier :( agh!
I was hoping to have my pro card (and discount!) for when it was released. Doubt it will happen now!
The line has a delicious new red nail polish and lip stick as well as a few nude lip sticks which I will be all over (red because im love red nails and lips, nude to look for a replacement for my beloved Twig-twig).
I love the whole line, the whole concept. It reminds me of my Pierre et Gilles book of sailors.
Im hoping i dont love the line as much when i see it in person <3 |
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| My Mac wishlist: |
[Apr. 22nd, 2008|12:49 am] |
This is for my own benefit...so yeah :/ ignore if you will... or take a gift idea from here if you want to win me over like mad. ;)
I need to keep track and stuff :/
Lipstick
1) Lady Bug
2) Twig Twig (limited edition, I need a back up since this color is awesome on me)
3) Dubonnet
4) Masque (hard to find because its a limited edition and NOT on the mac site)
5) any of the mac for playboy lipsticks (very hard to find :()
Eyeshadows
1) Fafi eyes 2 (another limited edition, siigh)
2) parrot (another limited edition)
3) steamy
4) black tied
5) deep truth
4) Nile
Shadestick
1) Sharkskin
Paint Pots
1) Rollickin'
2) any of the McQueen Pots
paints
1) Flammable
eyeliner
1) Foxy Lady
2) Prunella
3) Phone Me/Text Me
4) Fab Orchid/Dash Lily
glitter
1) 3d silver
2) antique gold |
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| lemming |
[Apr. 19th, 2008|04:02 pm] |
My Personality
| | Neuroticism | | Extraversion | | Openness to Experience | | Agreeableness | | Conscientiousness | |
| You are generally calm, although some situations can make you feel anxious or tense, however you tend to lack energy and have difficult initiating activities. People generally perceive you as distant and reserved, and you do not usually reach out to others. You tend not to express your emotions openly and are sometimes not even aware of your own feelings. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up, however you generally see others as selfish, devious, and sometimes potentially dangerous. You are not an overly cautious person. You will think about alternatives and consequences but make up your mind fairly quickly.
| Take a Personality Test now or view the full Personality Report.
The best Buying Pet Gifts. |
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| Agh |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|04:16 pm] |
I can't turn the ranty feminist off. I can't I can't I can't! It's starting to bother me, but I don't know why being a feminist has such a stigma. I shouldn't want to turn it off, but I'm starting to feel guilty for being so militant about my beliefs.
I don't know what it is... but everything is just upsetting me. Maybe it's because i know things are wrong and at the same time I don't understand why it's okay to be completely for human rights while being a feminist is a BAD WORD.
That's it, I'm frustrated.
Is the want for equal treatment for all genders truly that different than the want for equal treatment across humanity?
people need to get over themselves. FEMINIST, is not a bad word.
And I need to stop being so frustrated. |
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[Apr. 17th, 2008|01:05 am] |
so im starting to say fuck the internship because it's more heartache than it's worth...and I can make more money working at Wellesley.
because like 500 a month + 160 commuting is not in my studently budget. not at all. Esp. with an unsure amount to be made at an internship that i may or may not work.
and knapp is good money.
saaa. yeah, i need to chill because im stressing oout so much about money im thinking that going home to CA would be nice... and once i snap back to reality i'll claw my eyes out for thinking that was a good idea.
yeah, im k bye-ing the bay area.
ARE YOU YOUR INTERNSHIPS?
we shall see... I'm in search of my favorite cardboard box so i can live in it after graduation.
so much for going to bed early. I love the way stress finds a way to keep me awake :P |
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[Mar. 30th, 2008|03:13 am] |
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| Quite accurate, I suppose! |
[Mar. 26th, 2008|10:59 pm] |
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Which Victorian Stereotype are you?
created with QuizFarm.com |
| You scored as The Cad Rake! Dandy! Man about town! You're many things, but mostly, you're in debt. Those pearl embroidered cravats don't come cheap, you know. Just hope your creditors don't bang on the door while you're seducing lady Pants-a-Lot.
Test by www.MollyCrabapple.com
The Cad |
| 67% | The Artiste |
| 63% | The Lady |
| 54% | A Tramp |
| 46% |
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| Neubauten... |
[Mar. 24th, 2008|02:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Work :( | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
Neubauten is the soundtrack to my dreams. Listening to them just makes me feel so much better about everything again. The groups I feel like this about are few and far between so I welcome the feeling.
They are so, incredibly inspiring...and I'm happy to have that pond of inspiration.
blob blob blob. |
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| Murder on the Dancefloor... |
[Mar. 23rd, 2008|02:41 am] |
Yesterday at XMortis they played I Scorch the Ground followed by Beloved.
Break my heart... |
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| ISTP |
[Mar. 21st, 2008|12:53 pm] |
So I've been obsessing over my Myers Briggs typology for the past 12 hours or so (thanks, Cristina).
Last night I had a good ol laugh re: the suggested jobs for the ISTP (athlete? Motorcyclist? thrilling). Today I am lol-ing at groups of people who guess the typologies for movie characters, actors, films, literature characters.
I share my typology with Heath Ledger, Jack Bauer and Achilles. Does this make me badass? :P
PS: my movie is apparently, Rebel Without a Cause :P And people generally think the god Ares is an ISTP.
Clearly, I should not be working as an IT person looking to get into art or fashion... I should be blowing heads off and being a loner.
EDIT! I also share my type with ff8's zell, ff9's amarant, ffx-x2's auron and paine, Wolverine, Mystique.
Im starting to think all of the myers briggs esque tests ive taken in the past 5 years are lying to me. |
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| Something to do... |
[Mar. 19th, 2008|05:01 pm] |
So this is roughly a to do list for me:
get zimmerman info for rec letter
ask hansen or marvin to write rec letter
resume (blah)
further plan for saturday performance (last minute? me?)
plan set for wellesley show
record audition for eemed show which means... coercing hansen into reserving a video camera for me
research idea and songs for night of 1000 goddesses
so yeah. I'm auditioning for lots of shows... which you know, is kinda scary since I'm not that great/seasoned but i figure, why the heck not! I really don't know what to do for the goddess thing since ive never really felt any deep connexions with any goddesses (or any deity for that matter, save Hermes...no surprise there though). I don't even know which culture to begin with. I was thinking Aztec since I've been so keen on my mexicanness lately... but i dont know. I kind of think I will just fudge it and choose someone like, i dunno...Judith of Holoferenes-beheadment fame.
I shall call this an exercise in mind... and an exercise in whats out of the box for me.
we shall see.
that being said, suggestions are always welcome ;) |
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theblackqueen's journal
