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Suffer (with) the little children [Aug. 2nd, 2005|08:46 pm]
I am quitting the daycare in about 4 or 5 days and I am sooo excited. (To make a long story short)In case I haven't talked to some of you in a while, I reluctantly got a job at a nursery school, the nice word for day care.

It's pretty much the worst job that I've ever ever worked. I've also realized that it's not the kids that I don't like, it's the other people who like kids.

I work with the rudest women that I have ever met. They are completely unprofessional, bossy and catty. I have never been more insulted at a job in my life. Today I got told off twice by the same woman who is as old as my mom. Here's how this goes...

Today this "bigshot" 18 year old that I work with, whom everyone trusts for some reason, decided that it was a good idea to take 15 2-year olds outside to go run through a sprinkler in their diapers. Now, in order to take children this small outside you are required to put sunscreen on them head to toe before they even set foot out the door. Oh, and another thing - this chick decides to do all of this a half hour before we serve lunch. One of the little 2-year olds didn't have any sunscreen with her name on it. By law, we are not able to use any sunscreen, lotion, diaper cream, unless it was given by a parent. I can understand this seeing how many allergic reactions people have too.

So anyway, this little girl had just intergrated into the toddler classroom last week, she was in the infants before. I went to go ask the woman who runs the infant room if she had any. Instead of politely saying "no". She lectured me for 5 minutes about how I "wouldn't dare" put anyone elses sunscreen on that child. I didn't even consider this an option, but instead of hearing my question she just told me off. I again repeated to her, my initial question of " If a child is fair skinned and she's going to get sunburned, what should we do?" She then scolded me and told me to get out of her room because I was going to wake up her babies.

I went back and told the 18 year old boss that she didn't have any, she then went over my head and the other woman in infant's head and asked the Director if we could use someone elses' sunscreen, in which she gave into making me look like a complete idiot.

And this is my day, everyday. I only do what I'm told but then I'm talked down to and ovverrode with someone elses' bullshit.
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For what it's worth [Jun. 13th, 2005|02:32 pm]
[music |Evil Beaver]

Yesterday I went to volunteer at Detroit's Festival of the Arts. I passed out bags of stickers and coloring sheets, and some other PBS propaganda. I also helped the kids get ready to do 5 second spots for TV, which was super-fun.

It was so hot and humid that I could hardly think straight. I got huge-ly sunburned on my arms and nose. I look like a beet.
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I think it's called my destiny that I am changing... [May. 9th, 2005|02:32 pm]
[mood |displaced]
[music |Mates of State/Team Boo]

So I think that it's about time that I update this journal. It's been over a year and I've been a horrible person. I have not kept up with my friends as well as kept in touch. I'm living in Macomb twp right now which should be a humbling experience; that is -- if I don't blow a fuse first.

I miss Ypsilanti, even though I kept saying "I can't wait to get the fuck out of here." It's funny how you really like a place more than you realize. I mean, hate the ghetto, the crime, the deadness of it, but I really miss the people. I miss the uniqueness of things and the down-to-earthness of people in Ypsilanti because they were constantly having to deal with Ann Arbor egos.

If I get into U of M in the fall, I won't be away too long. I keep waiting around for my last letter of reccommendation and it never shows up. I also am putting off FAFSA which is idiotic.

I need to find a job soon. My bank account hates me, and I hate it as well.
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Back from Hell [Dec. 1st, 2004|11:35 am]
[mood | accomplished]
[music |Charlie Brown Christmas, by Vince Guiraldi Trio]

Hey Guys,

I realized that I haven't updated since July, and that itself is a crime. Because there are plenty of things to write about, I just can never think of any...

One of the best things that happened in 5 months was my birthday on 24th. My family took me to Benihana in Troy. I think that Katie was impressed. She wants to have her birthday there too in January. Besides the usual Benihana tricks, they also banged a gong and sang me happy birthday in Japanese and gave me a delicious birthday (eggroll?) Well I don't know what it was, but it was shaped like a cut eggroll but tasted like goodhumor Strawberry Shortcake bars. Deeeelicious!


Also, so everyone knows, I was having a frusterating night on Monday, in the mean time I put a full garbage bag on top of my car because I usually take it out to the dumpster which is like 80 miles from my house and is full of sneaky trolls. I like to have my warm car close and running so the usual ghetto trash don't harass me to buy some gold or Cameras. One time this guy in a white mini-van ( with dubs of course)said "Hey Mami!" Like you wanna buy some rings, some gold? I gave him a dirty look and said that I didn't need any..He continued to follow me and yell out his window "Come on Mami, why you gotta be so cold?" "..

Anyway,I was driving to throw my trash out, when I started PMSing and crying and decided to call my mom, and instead of making it to the trash I just drove off with the garbage bag sitting on top of my car.

I hadn't realized that I didn't throw it out until I got to Eastern and in the Library parking lot. I looked around and then put it by the car parked next to me and walked into the library.

Now I have to go to my African American Women's Lit class, for more depressing stories about slavery and incest. Yay. I'm so glad the sun is shining.
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gunshots and fevers without Tylenol. [Jul. 7th, 2004|01:41 pm]
[mood |blahhhh]
[music |Moldy Peaches]

You can tell that the full moon is in effect when customers at Barnes and Noble become crazier and crazier.

Yesterday, there were 2 old ladies who came up to information because they were looking for a book that they didn't know the title or the author for. ( big surprise) However, they knew that it was on the Diane Rehms show on NPR.

Now Barnes and Noble has this quick link called "in the media" which is supposed to be updated every day as a new book or cd is promoted through either radio stations or television. Again, big suprise that it is abandoned most of the year, because this book was nowhere to be found.

It turns out that this woman wanted a book about a woman reporter who was stationed in Afghanistan. If you know anything about any of the books that have been published in the last 2 years, they ALL include some martyr journalist who chooses to hide somewhere in the middle east. So when someone says that they don't know the title nor the author for a book like that, I just show them to the Current Affairs and tell them to knock themselves out.

Because I was working with Charlie, who is one of the most generous and helpful employees at B&N, he volunteered to get out the yellow pages and call the radio station.

We found the book for her, but it wasn't in our store. ( of course) She then says "You people should watch 60 minutes tomorrow night-- they're gonna interview President Kennedy!"

First of all, if you have let yourself plummet into that much of a time warp, you have no right driving, nor do you have the right to vote.

I think that people should be quizzed on general American History and common knowledge before they are allowed to fill out a ballot. It is unsettling that more than 50 percent of our country is senior citizens and most ( I imagine) don't know what the heck they are doing. Still voting for President Kennedy?

The frosting on the cake was the elderly man that called me a half hour before I left. I picked up the phone "Barnes and Noble...blah...blah...blah..." and then he shouts "YOU JUST CALLED ME" I asked him "I called you?" and he replied "Well one of yous did" He had told me that he had a special order in, and he wanted to find out the titles. I looked them up in the computer to find out that they were all new age books on finding the Bermuda Triangle...

I named all of the books to him, and then he orders me to pick out "a good one" for him. I told him that I am not studied on the Bermuda Triangle, and would not be a good candidate for finding a good book. He then says "Well you can tell a good picture from the next, can't you?" Evidentally he wanted one with good pictures and a map. Of course, I picked out the craziest cheapest one possible, and told him that it was awesome. Then, I told him that I would put it aside...he then demands that I find yet another book for him put out by DK that was in the kids section that was one of those "Beginning to read books" because he assured me it was a high quality book. I told him, "yeah, but there are only about 20 words too"

He then tells me to "average" the prices of the books out so that I can ship them to him. I asked him for his credit card number, and he told me that he didn't believe in credit cards. He insisted that he would mail me a personal check, as long as we ship him his books. I told him that retail doesn't work that way, and transferred his call to a manager.

I was venting to Steve in the backroom that this guy was completely nuts. "Hi, I don't believe in Credit Cards, but I believe in the Bermuda Triangle" that's just like saying that you don't believe in Credit Cards, but you believe in Chewbacca.

Steve said that lit up an idea that he is going to start up a band called "Chewbacca Death Cult" in which each member of the band dresses up like a character from StarWars and instead of backup dancers, he'll just have Droids. I told him that it was a really indie idea.

Later that day, I went out with Erica to set an appointment up for my car and went to Urban Outfitters.

I got some Thai food and collapsed on the couch. I then decided to go to bed early, and cried because it was so fucking hot outside. My fan was just blowing hot air around my room and I felt like a two year old with the flu.


Today is better, I'm trying to be productive, and possible get a Kitchen Table ( and maybe a Cat) with Erica after work.
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injured rabbits in glass cages [Jul. 2nd, 2004|04:23 pm]
[mood | accomplished]
[music |Laurie Anderson - Life on a String]

Today was pretty stupid other than my bodacious energy that had me cohorting around with my focus all day long. Good thing I'm motivated, yet losing my mind every other minute...I set out to be superwoman and do some one stop errands at my beautiful Ypsilanti District Library, I was jamming out to Nikko Costa, when suddenly I realized I wasn't that cool.

Funny how, I drove all the way to the library to find out

a) I have no password to log onto the computers ( this is obviously a new installment-- no library card, no internet)

b) I have no letter of proof to get myself a library card...

c) I also have no purse.

Sometimes I like to drive 50 on a 40 zone with no driver's licsence, I don't know...

Anyway, to make a long story short, I swore a little bit, and then I sucked it up and went back to Apple Tree to gather up my sachel and chill out.

I ended up getting even more done than intended. I went to Adray to drop off my film, and went to Anya and David's apartment to go feed Yoda ( their cat) and water their garden.

Now, I am a bewitching library patron with some mad job searching skills.

Also, work was an idiot fest.

Why does the bathroom smell like chemicals and mango?

Why do our cleaning people smell like old marijuana?

Why does Michael Jackson write songs that compare falling in love to horror?

Why do we play jazz similar to the smooth sounds of TJ Maxx?

Anyway, talk amongst yourselves, I'm out.
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Assistant Gift Bitch named Helga [Jun. 4th, 2004|07:28 pm]
[mood | apathetic]
[music |Lyle Lovett and his Big Band ( compliments of Anya)]

Guess what? I'm back and meaner than ever....I've been kicking myself for not writing about my boastful life.

I'm at the bookstore around 4-5 days..

I've realized these things:

1) I need to slow down. Bigtime.

2) The bookstore sucks more than a fat woman eating a popsicle.

3)Money will never "appear"

4) People with British accents are always assumed to be smarter.

Therefore, I will now talk in a Masterpiece Theatre-esque accent so that Ann Arbor people don't undermine my intelligence.

A few days ago a woman came into the store who looked like she was from the Michigan Malitia. She had a full camo jacket and appeared very rough. She also had really heavy BOOTS on.
Natalie was at the upstairs computer with me and the woman approached us. She asked for books on "edibles". We both looked at her waiting for her to continue. Natalie replied "Oh, so Cookbooks?" and the womans expression turned into a nasty snarl, then she said "NO, EDIBLES"...I said, "Well there sure are a lot of things that are edible; are you reffering to things that are crawling or plants mam?"
She wasn't happy with me either. I didn't really care at this point. At least I can finish my sentences and don't ask for vague things...
Also, the same night, there was this man who asked for "Hobbies". I asked him what kind and he responded. "YOU KNOW, HOBBIES!" I then added "OH, Collectibles?" and then he was like "CHRIST NO!" "YOU KNOW! GUNS!!!" and then made an air gun motion with his finger and said "bang bang!".


Today I waited on a woman who appeared to be Donna Sommers. I kept looking at her like she might start humming "It's raining men".

I just ate some Shrimp Tortellini via Natalie and Chad and it was very very good. My tummy is very happy.
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It's been a long time since I rock and rolled [Mar. 23rd, 2004|08:29 pm]
Today I tried to have a conversation with a war vet in a trenchcoat and it went nowhere. It was this old dude with a baseball hat that had all of the gold braiding around it, and an unbent brim and it said "US VET" Also, he had really long nose hair AND an ass-old trenchcoat. I couldn't tell if his glasses were intentionally yellow or just tinted from relentless nocotine....Anyway, the irony of it all was that he wanted to buy Gary Null's Power Aging, which made me laugh a little. He started off the whole process wrong by coming to the cash register when I was the only one standing there and looked around in the most space cadet way possible while laughing with his whistley lungs and not listening to what I was saying to him. Then, I pointed to the section upstairs as I explained that I was the only person on the register, as I couldn't leave. He replied with "Hauuuuuuuh?" and looked around some more. I then told him to go upstairs and make a quick right to the health section. He nods in an irritated way because I wasn't going to go through the trouble to drive him in my ambulance to take him up there myself. I then watched him totter up the escalator when he disreguards anything that I told him and turns directly left.


Anyway, this was pretty much my day at Barnes and Noble...times 5. I think the theme of the day was " I'm looking for a Spanish author who writes books that are a hundred and fifty pages long, but I forgot the name" or "I'm really interested in Satan" or "Can you tell me about traditional Scottish costume, my girfriend is having a Rennaisaince wedding, and I'm making the dress...." over and over and over and over.

I was sitting in the breakroom for my last twenty minute break and somehow everyone started talking about wedding rings (no, we're not sorority girls).. Natalie and I were talking about how crappy the Diamond Mining business is and then Susie got upset because she had a huge diamond on her finger. Mike and Marcia are at least original and made their own wedding rings (no, not of twist ties) Marcia is a Jewler ( in the most nonconventional way) and made rings out of some Asian metal mix that looks really sweet. Anyway, this conversation started out with the evils of Wal-Mart and I said " Hey you know who could possibly be worse than Wal-Mart? DaBeers and then it all exploded like a party full of housewives eating bon-bons reading Mattie Stepanak poems.

Then Steve walks in and told me that one of his jelly bracelets broke. I told him that that's what happens when you shop and Hot Topic. He admitted that it wasn't Hot Topic, but Claire's that he purchased them in 1999 and has been wearing them ever since. He says that jelly bracelets have to be a certain thickness to be cool, and his were cool because they were just thin enough without looking gay. ( I still told him that he was gay) Then he told me that when all of his jelly bracelets die, he's going to kill himself. I told him "Wow, kinda like those "wish bracelets". I don't think anyone thought that was funny.


Anyway, I'm back in the hood and up to no good...Or starting horrible perspective drawings, ( you pick)
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Ash Wednesday [Feb. 25th, 2004|08:40 am]
[mood |achy]
[music |Cat Power, Dear Sir]

So today is my Grandma Grabowski's funeral at Saint Lawrence in Utica. It is going to be a sad day, but at least everything will be over. I won't have to deal with any family ever again.

One thing that really pissed me off today was my parents ignorant hype for the "Passion" movie directed by Mel Gibson that is hitting theatres today, appropriately for the mark of lent.

I think that I don't get so angry that a religeous story is made into a movie, I get angry that someone like Mel Gibson ( who in my opinion, has a greater importance than Christ in the American public) is directing this movie. I guess I just don't like Hollywood and religion mixing, or one becoming confused with the other.

I was reading a review today and they were saying that there were a lot of movie "tie-in" items that they are selling to promote the movie. One of these "tie-in" items are replica nails from the cross. WHAT THE Hell? I mean, hey, can we get a little more sacreligious? One more thing to market for the hungry American consumer.

My parents really like Mel Gibson because he is a devout Traditional Catholic. They think that he is a good man because he "likes God".

I think that if a Passion Story has to be rated R in a theatre, it's not saying much for the movie. Yeah, so the true story IS full of a lot of gore and violence, but that's reality. If these "CHRISTIANS" can't let their children watch the "realism" that reflects the BOOK that they shove in their face everyday ( which by the way is jam packed with violent and gorey language) then, what is it saying about Christians?

If people want to Sugar coat religion, then fine, but it's one more reason not to take them seriously. How can you eliminate children from a movie that tells a story that they hear every Easter?

All in all, maybe I should be grateful that children aren't seeing this movie. Maybe I should encourage their innocent faith, and not let it get trampled by the faddish pseudoreligion that Hollywood promotes.


Okay. I'm done.
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Good Friday [Feb. 20th, 2004|11:51 am]
[mood |downy-fabric fresh]
[music |Goldfrapp, Felt Mountain]

So today, I feel like things are finally starting to look up. ( It might be for the fact that it's utterly beautiful outside aka 45 degrees) Even if it rains and stays this warm, I'll throw a spring party.

Last night I went to Sidetracks again with my Writer's Workshop Class. It was a lot of fun. No, Ruby wasn't there...I can't stress enough how nice it is to have a good class of people. I feel like it is such a family. I've been talking with a lot of them and kind of deciding and ruling out what I want to do after graduation. I never thought that I might stay at Eastern for my MFA, but part of me really wants to. I think I would really miss the community that Eastern has formed for me if I were to move away. I know that I want to get away and see something else, but I have just now realized how unique my University is apart from a lot of other competitive Universities. It really is quite different, and there is a lot of talent budding and flourishing in this general area.

Anyway, I get to find out how I've done on my test today in Art History. I'm feeling this last minute panic that maybe possibly I didn't do as hot as expected...Oh well we'll see...
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why do I try. [Feb. 13th, 2004|08:45 pm]
[mood |lame]
[music |Tori Amos "Playboy Mommy"]

I think my whole day can be summed up in a little "what the hell". I was happy that I woke up with no hangover whatsoever, and I went to class, and actually enjoyed a lecture on Hellenistic Art. After getting to my car I realized that I was really hungry and needed to get some fresh, good food. I ended up getting my paycheck which was very meager, and ventured off to get some Japanese food at Totoro.

I wouldn't have thought of eating out today, except for the fact that my roomates left the kitchen atrocious last night and evidentially expected me to clean it up. "Hey, guess who's not a den-mother?" I left this really pleasant note that said. "Can someone please clean the dishes and wipe down the counter? Thank You, Jessica" So I was hoping that I'd get a little lunch and then come back to a clean apartment.

I arrived at Totoro, and I was suprised that I was one of 2 tables. The waitress was really salty to me, because I didn't fill out my sushi order sheet correctly. "I was like I only want one egg nigiri." and she's like "I'LL DO IT FOR YOU *SIGH*" and then all of the waiters were speaking in Japanese and looking my way, I had this huge suspicion that they were talking about me. Thats' what I hate about being one of the only diners in a restaurant is that I feel like they are always watching me put food in my mouth, because they are standing around and have nothing else to do.

The second "fun" thing about Totoro was that the only other dining people there were Indiana Jones and his middle age "ladyfriend". Mind you, Indiana Jones didn't really look like Indiana Jones, he could only aspire to have such a hat and jacket.
He kept talking about metaphysical things and martial arts, and this lady was sitting on the edge of her seat about to cream her jeans. She kept gasping as though he had lead her to "the light" or something. The worst part about the whole situation was that Indy kept talking like he was the Second Samurai, and he was sitting in a Japanese restaraunt. How tacky is that? He kept talking really slowly like he was trying to teach her lessons from the ART OF WAR. And she's saying things like
"Ohhhhh, you're so wonderful, you really make sense to me......why, you should have your own radio show, they would love you!"

"Ohhhhhhhhhh that's what Pratha is! I never knew what that slight jerk of energy was when I was bending into Child Pose!"

This is what I was listening to the whole time that I was eating. And he had his goddamn Aussie hat the whole time he was eating. She was so pathetic that she was hanging on to the words of this guy like the second coming of Christ, not even questioning the validity. Maybe this is what happens when you're an ex-hippie and haven't had any for fifteen years. People like Indiana Jones look really hot to you I guess. There's so many middle aged guys like this in Ann Arbor it makes me want to puke. After the divorce, they somehow, develop a strong sense of Chi, and go crazy.

It reminded me kind of like that Ian guy on High Fidelity that Laura has a rebound affair with. "His name was Ian, he smelled like Patchuli, and listened to what ever world music was trendy that month".

Okay, so after I leave that place I'm crossing the street, and I notice that there is this iced over bank of snow between the meters and the curb. There was no good way to gracefully cross ( unless I had used the crosswalk like I was supposed to) but, no I like to J-walk in unparticular places. So because I have knees for feet, I lost my balance and totally wiped out on the sidewalk on my knees. This lady yells "OH MY GOD!!!!" and her husband is like "ARE YOU OKAY, ARE YOU OKAY?!" I felt like I was getting CPR for scraping my knees. I didn't hurt myself, I just felt like a big loser.

So out of my lunch trip I gained:

1) The black sheep of Totoro restaraunt
2) The witness of some weird hippie hoochie cootchie
3) 8 dollars less in my wallet
4 ) Humiliation
5) A nice new pair of jeans worn in the knees


Then, I got home to my apartment at about 4 and guess what? Fish and Barb are still sleeping and no dishes done!!! Wow, glad you know where your priorities are. So because I was at that point depressed, I decided to take a nap, and hope that when I woke up everything would be cleaned up. Instead, Barb and Fish just left, and didn't do anything. Thanks. Thanks Thanks.

So I cleaned up, and swore alot, ( there was rotting food sitting on the counter) and then decided to go to the grocery store to get some flour and margarine for some cookies, and ended up getting sassed around for writing a check over from the cashier. As nice as I was dressed, I got treated like a criminal. She was in disbelief that I lived anywhere around the area, and hesitated to let me write the check. I'm like "I've written checks for money over at Kroger many times before" she was like "IT DOESN'T MATTER" "YOU HAVE TO HAVE A LOCAL NUMBER AND ADDRESS" and then when I asked for a quarter roll for laundry, it set her over the top. She was like "I DON'T GOT 'DOS HERE, YOU HAVE TO GO TO CUSTOMER SERVICE" ( slams the cash drawer)

Anyway, I'm off to do laundry...and bake some cookies.
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TOYS! TOYS! TOYS! [Feb. 12th, 2004|04:49 pm]
[mood |can I get an extreme makeover?]
[music |Trembling Blue Stars]

How question marks cease to matter and the process of questioning
dissolves at the risk of disappearing. And open palms cease to reach for
answers for fear of losing too much blood at once.

- nathalie stephens




Today is really really lame. Because it is so lame, I've decided to write. Today I woke up, and then went back to bed until noon. I attempted some lousy homework, and then I was planning on going to this Anne Carson reading at U of M. To my dismay, I couldn't find the room number or the building, so I am not going. 1) because I am lazy 2) because this intense homework that should have been done oh, about 4 hours ago isn't.

Tonight I have my poetry class which should be good. I don't have to contribute anything but my firey intellect and sharp wit, so I'm all set. I also have to critique some really bad poetry. My class has decided that we are going out for some beer after class at Sidetracks, which is a good thing. I really like my class. ALSO. I don't have to work tommorrow morning at Barnes and Noble, so I can have a good time.

I should have some pretty good stories after this class. It's "La Ruby's" birthday, and we're critiquing her poems. What a mess. What a mess.
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AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! [Feb. 4th, 2004|02:18 pm]
[mood |ulcer-like]
[music |Belle and Sebastian, "She's losing it"]

I just thought I'd say that. Bought my white curtain today, just in case anyone cares...worst day of my life. worst day ever. Yay. Who wants a nervous breakdown?
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Why am I writing? [Feb. 2nd, 2004|04:43 pm]
[mood |burnt sienna]
[music |Pretenders, "Criminal"]

Yep. Another exciting Monday at EMU. I am sitting in the computer lab waiting for Rachael's bitch-ass to get here...
I haven't been nearly as productive as I'd hope for, partially for the fact that I've been fighting with my mom on the phone off and on.

I've spent an entire afternoon drawing eggs; therefore, I never want to look at eggs again. The American Dairy and Agricultural Association would snicker with delight to see that my drawings love eggs, from their heads down to their legs.

Anyway, tonight is going to be really trying...I have homework up the yin-yang. I'm awesome. Glad I put it off in the process of looking through meaningful cookbooks...

Sometimes I think I should just bag it all up, and give into my housewife destiny. I've already got enough cleaning skills to make Mr. Clean, in all of his chemical cleanliness want to touch my ass. Betty Crocker is Jealous of my bottomless pile of awardwinning recipies, what's not to love? Soon enough I'll be wearing a pair of sweatpants and a ratty t-shirt from my "heyday" and have six little kids tugging at my bloated legs. ROCK!

Glad I fool myself with my academics.... who's an idiot?
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Sadly enough, I remember these [Jan. 30th, 2004|12:52 pm]
If you have enough time to read these you should.
http://x-entertainment.com/articles/0863/
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losing my breakfast [Jan. 28th, 2004|12:10 pm]
[mood |pastel]
[music |Joni Mitchell, Blue]

"Hi, my name is Wanda and I like to brush my teeth in my car".

Yeah, so this morning I woke up late and had to jet to school with partial ice on my windshield. I also shoved down a Kashi bar that I had in my backseat for rushed mornings where I couldn't make myself a decent breakfast. In the process of intravenously taking in my coffee and eating my brick, er, I mean energy bar, this lady in a red focus in front of me was brushing her teeth and spitting out the window. She also had a license plate that said "WANDA" so no one would forget her name.

I couldn't eat anymore after I saw that because it was so sick. She had nappy cotton like hair that was shoved into an eighty year old snow hat too. I couldn't make out the rest, nor did I hope to. I just could imagine her in all her hippydom listening to Tribal Sounds and brushing her nasty yellow teeth with Licorice root. I bet her car smelled like a Juiceman Pro and there were crumbs of granola bars and cat urine all over the back seat. Ahhhhhhhh. That ruined my morning.

Okay, so I went to my drawing class this morning which was excellent, except for the fact that everything that Soro-hoe said sucked bigtime. She kept bitching about all of the drawing that she had to do. She is an art major, yet she doesn't know what gesture drawing is. She kept pouting and making "cutesy" faces at the prof. I wanted to gag. Also, she's taken a liking to the guy that she sits next to who at this time is one of two guys in my class. He seems like a real douche too. I overheard her flirting with him, and asking all these lame questions like "So Ryan, what do you want to be when you grow up?! (giggle giggle giggle)" and "So, how old are you? " "TWENTY EIGHT!!!"

-->"Hey, hoebag, maybe Ryan doesn't want to talk to your ass" "Why don't you stop wearing that putrid pink lipstick, there's an idea"

Oh man, who's in a bad mood? This guy.

So anyway, I need to go to my Ancient Art lecture right now, which should be a real trip...
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All tomorrow's parties [Jan. 24th, 2004|08:01 pm]
[mood |achy]
[music |Peaches and Iggy Pop "Kick It"]

So, not that it matters to anyone, but a random childhood memory erupted in my brain after drinking a toffee nut frappuccino.....MONSTER MASH. Does anyone remember this game? I am really sad because I don't know where mine is. I just remember that game being really intense and hating my next door neighbor because she really kicked ass with that suction-cup monster hand slapper thing, and always won. No, I'm not on acid, I just enjoy cool monster games, especially when they involve skill-less competition.

I think the thing that provoked this was Rachael's drawing of her Uterus "running" that was posted up in the receiving room at work. She said that it hurt so bad that she was sure that it was going to errupt out of her and start running on the Fallopian tubes. I thought that was pretty funny. This picture looks a lot like a monster out of the fabulous Japanese movie, Yokai Monsters http://www.digitalmonsterisland.com/yokai_spook_warfare.html

Anyway, today was pretty long, and I think I have an ulcer!! I don't think the coffee/juice combo helped it this morning. Besides, work was pretty much a drag. I think that my main goal of this morning was hiding, and finding ways not to work. Then SOMEONE told me that they thought it would be a good idea to go through all the SQL/SQL Server computer books and do returns. I think that was my breaking point. It sure is a good thing that I had so much fun hanging out with Tim last night, or else this day would be unforgiven...

Tonight I am going to Ed, Steve, Joe, Graham, and Jason's house for a Rock and Roll party (aka Ed's 22 birthday) I think that it will be a good time. Barb has told me that she plans on getting drunk. ( I guess last night wasn't enough) I think that my favorite line from her last night was "YOU'RE GOING TO BE SORRY TOMORROW!" and then after that she whispered "AND BY YOU'RE GOING TO BE SORRY, I MEAN, I'M GOING TO BE SORRY!" After this she proceeded to try to get me to do the Apostle's Creed with hand movements. It sure is a good thing that Barb is a funny drunk, or else I wouldn't be able to handle her drinking habits. Oh well, another night of designated driver. Wooooooooooooo!
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Are you a Mexi-CAN, or a Mexi-Can't? [Jan. 22nd, 2004|11:33 pm]
[mood | tired]
[music |John Cage, Daughters of the Lonesome Isle]

That line summed up the most pathetic movie that I have seen in weeks: "Once Upon a Time, In Mexico" I admit, I would not have rented the movie unless it was already lying around the house, which it was. Barb, Emily, and Fish were planning on making a movie night of it, and I was like "hey, why not?-- everyone loves a little Jonny Depp action movie, right?"

Well, as soon as he pulled out his mechanical arm and threw it in a carpet bag, and shortly gave that line, as stated above, I knew that I could stop watching and go to bed. I knew it had bad reviews, but hey, Enrique Englesias? YES PLEASE!

It turns out that Antonio Banderas ( how do you say, ah, yes...) and Enrique Englesias are both part of this Mariachi gang, along with some other fat Latino looking dude who's name I can't recall.

Imagine, the Three Amigos supersized and gone haywire with a script that might as well been Captain Corelli's Mandolin. That was it, in a nutshell, without seeing the end.


Anyway, I had class tonight, which I felt unprepared for, but I managed to talk slow and reiterate Kim Gordon from Sonic Youth for 25 minutes which was a definate plus. I think it went over better than I expected.
I went out into the hall and there was this guy who was apparently a teacher crawling on the floor with about 5 security guards. Evidentally it was a professor, and he had gone nuts. I didn't think it was a seziure, because he seemed to be with it, nuts, but with it. He kept smacking people and telling them to "GET THE HELL AWAY" and they kept trying to hold him down. He talked really childishly too, like he had woken up from a bad dream. Hmmm. Maybe his class was a bad dream. Anyway, hope he didn't kill anyone, caus he seemed pretty pissed off.

Anyway, work tommorow, yay. I'm just imagining maybe I can act more like a Country Bear, rather than a bookseller. And quote awesome Jonny Depp lines all day long.
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Why doesn't my school have adequate parking? [Jan. 21st, 2004|04:03 pm]
[mood | awake]
[music |Helium, The Dirt of Luck]

This was the question that I was asking myself today when I was almost 20 minutes late for my 1 o'clock art survey lecture. Not only that I was wasting precious gas while pedestrians' tomfoolery was getting the best of me, and like usual chased them around until I realized that they were parked nowhere in the vicinity.

Hey, glad I paid 70 dollars so that I can park 7 blocks away off campus. Great, glad you have my money.

Anyway, I had fun in my lecture, and I ended up on the top ranks of the class for my test, which is comforting, considering that I thought I'd fail the exam. YAY.

This morning I got out of my Drawing class early because it was about 50 degrees in the classroom, again. The prof. even agreed that making us sit there and think in such extreme cold was torture. So, I ended up going over to Panera Bread, the antichrist of breadshops, and getting a bagel and coffee. Everytime I get a bagel there I feel like my insides are going to either implode, or slowly go into diabetic shock from the amount of sugar in the bagels.

Rachael and I are just "kickin" it in the library right now deciding what to make for dinner and whatnot. In case anyone is wondering Paradox cafe now proudly brews Starbucks coffee....Glad they've joined the team! Now I can study and get an ulcer at the same time.

On the same note, the hot chocolate machine is back in action, and I'm all about that. Rich velvety goodness in a cup. SCREW YOU STARBUCKS!!!! %&^&R^%E^%$#@


Oh, this also made my day. .... Suddenly I felt 8 again.

http://x-entertainment.com/articles/0862/
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Jumpin-Jack Flash at Church's Chicken [Jan. 20th, 2004|02:41 pm]
[mood |neutral]
[music |Barbara Manning "Shalala Song"]

I can't believe that I'm actually at the library this early. Well, it's a quarter to 3, but still, on a day off of school? Please.

Anyway, I'm in an overproductive mood, slightly caffinated, and wearing tights.

Last night I went to Anthony and Bennie's apartment in Southfield. It's always a good time at their very GQ highrise. Lots of Wine and a fine selection of liquor. Also, they have 3 cats. This is coming from Anthony who not only was painfully allergic to my cats at my house, but didn't like them so much either. They have these two shitspit kittens, Wembly and Mokey. I guess they found them at the Humane Society and adopted both brothers on impulse. Now they have 2 kittens that really enjoy listening to "Way Down Yonder on a Chatahootchie" by Alan Jacskson. Don't ask me how they found this out, but it's true, whenever they pop in the song, the kittens ears perk up and they get a little nuts.

Anyway, we were sitting around the apartment and opened this bottle of Chardonnay that tasted like rubbing alcohol with a "slight essence of Bosc Pear". So, Anthony says. After that, we moved onto some hard liquor. Anthony was going to make me a Margarita, but then I had convulsions thinking of my awesome experience of Tequilla, so he made me a drink with Vodka, Margarita Mix and Cranberry Juice. I am not one for mixed drinks, because they ultimately taste like sugar and nailpolish remover, but I have to say.....this drink tasted like the most awesome Lime Popsicle that I have ever tasted.

So in the meantime, Bennie throws this fit about needing to work out, or getting fat or something like that, and he tells us that he is going to the gym....I really didn't feel like going, seeing that I was drinking some liquor, but hey "why not".

15 minutes after Bennie left for the gym, Anthony and I cohorted through the halls of the complex with tall glasses of liquor in hand. I kept panicking because I thought that someone might see us and get us in trouble. ( Just because you can't walk through the streets with open booze) I thought that maybe since it was a common area, they would have a problem with our Las Vegas style supersized drinks. So we get downstairs, to where the stairwell is, and we notice some little kids running around. We freaked out and took an alternate way through a backroute, where we had to cross the Apartment management and check-in desk. We grabbed two "Phenoma-news" and ran across to the gym.

At this point Bennie is all by himself in the gym pumping iron on this Elliptical machine, and Anthony and I are pretty loaded. The best idea we could come up with was to work out with Bennie, so I hopped on a bike (drink in hand) and Anthony started power walking on the Treadmill, with his tall-boy.

Suddenly, we hear some other people come into the gym.. and we got freaked out that we were going to get busted. So we went out the front patio door and hid on the roof. Once we realized that it was just some thugs, we thought that it might be better to go inside, considering that it was a mere 6 degrees out. Even though these guys were some ghetto trash, we were still too embarrased to "hang out" in the gym. Anthony couldn't figure out how to turn off the treadmill, so we just left it running and ended up sitting at this table by the Pepsi machine that was straight out of Alice in Wonderland. The reason that I say that is the fact that when I sat my drink on it, it fell off, because it was assembled poorly. It looked more like a sad saucer "balancing" on a stick.

To be extra trashy, we ended up hiding in the ladies bathroom smoking cigarettes, after school special style. I decided that Anthony's name should be Vonge, and he decided mine should be Deb. Because in reality, we are just two sassy middle aged women.

After that we just went back to the apartment and all put our cinchers on, and cried about our weight. And then, smoked some more cigarettes and drank some Dutch beer.

I thought that the night would have ended there, but in fact, it didn't. Okay, so just in case anyone doesn't know this, Southfield roads are pretty fucked up. I was completely able to drive, I was on my way, when there was no sign to Southfield fwy. I passed it, as I usually do, and ended up flustered in a parking lot of a Topless Bar. As I am calling Bennie and Anthony for directions my car phone charger cord gets winded tightly around my steering wheel that I am frantically turning to get out of the parkinglot. So the whole way home I am freaking out about making a sharp turn, because the cord is wedged in so far, that it is making it almost impossible to turn it, but slightly to the right.

I found the freeway and all that good stuff, but the cord was still hanging from my steering wheel the whole time, bobbing at my leg.

I ended up talking to Tim on the way home, which took away the panic attack, and by the time that I was in the parking lot at my apartment, it just "fell" out of my steering wheel.
Right there, I knew my night could go no further.

Today, I woke up early and went to Dearborn to hang out with Tim. We went to a little diner and got some food and then went to this cool record shop, and I got an old record for 3 dollars. It's called Flanders and Swann, Bestiary Songs" All I know about this, is that there is a song titled:Twosome - Kang & Jag (Kangaroo Tango/Jaguar). I know that this is going to be an awesome record. How can you not love a cover that has jenky hand drawn animals?

Anyway, I'd better get to homework and such, or else I'll just start going on about some animals....
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