Squirrelman - Sins of the Past 60
Previously on Squirrelman - Sins of the Past
Squirrelman and the Crimefighters' League survived the week from hell, dealing with a massive prison break, having had their secret identities exposed to the world at large, gang wars, hideous creatures from beyond, two new super-criminal groups - the Implacable Foes and the Revolutionists, a trip to the Costumer, and an alternity invasion from the Negaverse.
For their many good deeds in the name of law, order, and justice, Mayor Ross-Carter invited the Crimefighters' League to become the official powered branch of the Action City Police Department.
Wayne Masters, the Midnight Avenger, offered the Crimefighters' League a home and a headquarters both - stately Masters Mansion, his ancestral home.
While comparing cases, the Crimefighters' League agreed that their priority had to be the troubles Downtown. Squirrelman split up the League into five teams, each with their own objectives. He and Moonbow would interrogate the brilliantly insane serial killer, Johnny Giggles...
Starring!
Matt Mattheson ......... as Squirrelman
Kimmy Sinclair ............... as Ragdoll
Jackson Archer ............ as Moonbow
with
Reed Sterling ....................... as Doc
Julia Sterling ................... as herself
Joe Sterling ....... as SuperTwin Red
Jerry Sterling .... as SuperTwin Blue
Jeannie Sterling .............. as Zephyr
When I wake up, Kimmy's already dressed - the League shorts and tshirt combo that the Costumer put together for her, her blonde hair in short twin braids. She puts on the mask while I watch.
I know there's lots of folks talk about the fetish of masks. Whatever. It has an affect on me, it has an affect on Kimmy, it works for us both, we don't make a big deal out of it. Still, lying there naked under the sheets while Kimmy puts on her work clothes is a turn-on, and it shows. She just gives me a smirk, comes over, kisses me long and hard. I'm about to pull her back into bed when she breaks away with a flirty grin.
"Tonight," she says, winking. Then she's out the door and I head for the shower.
I get out, get dressed - my spare Squirrelman outfit, the last one I have, League jacket, mask in one pocket, goggles in the other - and head for the kitchen. Julia and the twins are already up. I pour myself some coffee while the twins talk about sports and the news. Jeannie sleep-stumbles in, mumbles something, and pours herself some coffee, lots of milk and sugar. It's a normal morning in the Sterling household. I half expect Doctor Apocalypse or the Starslayer to come crashing through the wall any second.
But they don't. Julia's making pancakes for everyone so I eat up - not too much, or jumping from trains and rooftops won't go over too well. No sign of Reed, either. Looks like nothing is going to save me from making the phone call I don't really want to make.
Once my dishes are clear I thank Julia and tell them I'll see them tonight. I find a vid in a private room and dial the Mayor's direct line. It's early but the whole town knows she's in at six AM and out at ten PM.
The vid connects and I hear her aide answer.
"Yes?"
"This is Squirrelman. Let me speak to the Mayor."
The video feed comes through. Her aide, the guy whose life we saved on Friday, gives me the hard stare.
"How do I know you're Squirrelman?"
I hold up my Action City Costumed Crimefighter Identity Card, activating it.
"Patch me through to the Mayor."
"Very well." He's got the gall to sniff prissily. He can't meet my eyes, now he knows it's me. Like I'm the one made him piss himself.
The vid feed changes to the Mayor's face. She's got new glasses.
"Squirrelman."
"Mayor."
"What can I do for you?"
"My team and I talked over your offer," I tell her. "Sorry, but the answer's no."
"Very well. Good luck."
"Thanks, Mayor," I start to say, but she hangs up first. Bitch.
On the way out I run into Reed. He looks like he hasn't slept all weekend.
"Hey Doc. What's up?" Old jokes die hard.
"Quite a lot, actually." Not even a smile. Not good.
"Such as?"
"The disappearance of the Harvest clone, of course. The situation Downtown. The datahack. Everything. If that wasn't enough, there's a Senatorial committee that's asked me to meet with them in Washington this morning."
"Really. That's sudden."
"No, they contacted me Friday night."
"Well, good luck."
"Thanks. What're you up to, today?"
"Moonbow and I are going to question Johnny Giggles."
"Holy socks!"
"Yeah, I know. Be careful, etc."
"No, I mean- well, yes. But also, I've had the opportunity to speak to him. He's incredibly intelligent. If you're not extremely careful, he'll play you."
"I've interrogated crooks before, Doc."
"Giggles is no normal crook, Matt."
"Okay, I got you. Listen, I've gotta go."
"Sure, so do I. Can I give you a lift?"
"No, I want to run out some kinks."
"Okay then."
I head out the front doors into Sterling Plaza, making sure to pull on my mask before I get out of the elevator. There's a tour bus out front and they take a couple hundred digipics as I jump over them, catching a ride on the underside of a passing aerocar. The Sensational Squirrelman, something to tell the folks about back home.
Aerocar to el train, el train to rooftops, meet up with Moonbow outside ACPD HQ. He's wearing his old costume, no hint of the League uniform. His choice.
"Hey," I say, landing next to him.
"Just gonna walk in there?" he asks. Not much for small talk.
"I've got some resources," I answer. We walk around the block, climb a fire escape, across the buildings back toward the HQ.
"Now where?" he asks.
"Now I go to the can," I say, leaping across the alley between us and the HQ. Up the building quick as I can, air vent comes loose, inside in less than three seconds.
Through the air ducts, find the vent I want, and wait.
Not long. He's about due to start his shift. I hear him come in, talking to someone outside about a case. The door closes. The familiar sound of a man at a urinal. Check it, make sure it's him - tall African-American guy, thin-ish, slightly balding, nice suit.
I open the vent, lower myself so that I'm squatting on the edge of one of the stalls, close the vent and say, "Detective Knight."
I have to hold back a laugh when I see him jump. Not funny, not really. Immature. But fuckit, I'm glad I'm wearing the mask again because it hides my grin.
"I hate when you do that," he says to me.
"I know."
"You'll forgive me for not turning around?"
"Take all the time you need."
"What do you want?"
"Me and a buddy need to talk to Giggles."
"Are you fucked in the head?" he says, turning halfway to try a look at me.
"Mind your shoes."
"Fuck!"
"And no."
"Yeah, well, I need a month vacation somewhere where topless native girls bring me drinks with umbrellas in 'em."
"I can't do anything about that, Knight. But you can help me."
"Oh yeah? How?"
"Tell security you need to question Giggles about one of your cases."
"First of all, he's not implicated in any of my cases. Secondly, security needs about a dozen forms signed in triplicate to move him to an interrogation room."
"First of all, you're homicide. Secondly, bullshit."
"Yeah, it's bullshit, and you know why? Because Giggles is bugfuck!"
He finishes up at the urinal, zips up, turns to face me.
"And you're bugfuck too if you think I'm going to let you interrogate someone they've already executed four times. He's immortal, a genius, and completely insane. Whatever you need to ask him about, it's-"
"Konstantinopoulos."
That shuts him up so fast I actually hear his teeth clack. He thinks about it for a second or three, eyes narrow behind his glasses.
"What."
"The bomb at the Cosmos Lounge."
"Yes?"
"It's Praxis tech."
"So?"
"How did Giggles get it? How was Konstantinopoulos able to disarm it so quick?"
"From any number of explosive supply thefts. Because he's a genius and it's his tech."
"Think, Knight. Giggles said he improved the bomb. Rewired it. If he had actually rewired it, why didn't he rewire it so that disarming the bomb actually triggered it?"
"That's twisted."
"That's what he'd do."
"Yeah."
"So we need your tech guys to check out the bomb, make sure it was actually set to go off at all."
"What are you saying? The CEO of Praxis Technologies got Johnny Giggles to bring a dud bomb into a ritzy Uptown restaurant? Why?"
"Public relations."
"No, I figured that, thanks. Why would Giggles do it?"
"That's why we need to talk to him."
He's thinking, nodding. "Yeah. Okay."
"Where?"
"Room Nine. It's at the end-"
"I know where it is."
"Okay."
"Hey Knight?"
"Yeah?" he answers, turning around to wash his hands and wipe off the mess he got on his shoes.
"I've always wanted to ask, you related to Knight, from Knight and Daye?"
"Yeah, he's my cousin," he replies sarcastically. "We don't talk much, except at family reunions."
This is the part I love. He's got his back turned, his attention on his shoes, I open the vent and sneak out while he's still talking. When he turns around, I'm gone.
"I hate when you do that, too," I hear him say to the otherwise empty room. I have to clap a hand over my mouth to hold in my laugh.
Back outside, Moonbow's waiting.
"It's set."
"Getting in?"
"We're Action City Costumed Crimefighters, man. We just walk in the front door."
Which is what we do. We don't even get a second look. Moonbow's got to leave his bow and arrows at the security checkpoint, but other than that, no one even questions why we're there. I'm actually a little surprised.
"Problem?" Moonbow asks as we head for the elevators.
"Just disappointed in their security," I answer quietly.
"Don't be. Typical."
"I guess."
On the way in, I spot a familiar face on the way out.
"Hey, Jimenez," I call to him.
"Hey, Squirrelly," he says. Him and his partner, Simonson, come over, nod to Moonbow.
"Went back to the mask, huh?"
"Yeah, felt naked without it, you know how it is," I answer, waving a hand at the helmets they're carrying under their arms.
"Yeah," Jimenez laughs.
"Hey, Jimenez, let me talk to you for a second."
"Sure."
He and I leave Moonbow and Simonson to stare at each other.
"What's up, Squirrelly?"
Quick check, make sure no one's watching us.
"I need to get to the Interrogation level."
He just looks at me. Up until I saw him, I wasn't sure how we were going to get there.
"What are you asking me to do, Squirrelman?"
"Just swipe your security pass on the stairwell door. That's all."
He thinks about it for a second, looks away. Nods.
"Hey, Simonson!" he calls. "Go warm up the cruiser. I'll be there in a sec. Gotta take a piss."
Simonson says "Sure thing," and heads off. Moonbow comes over, we follow Jimenez over to the stairwell, pretending he's leading us to somewhere for something. No one's watching.
Quick swipe of his security clearance card, the door opens, Moonbow and I are in. I tell Jimenez I owe him one as we slip in. He doesn't say anything, started walking away as soon as the door was open.
We go down six, seven flights of stairs. Interrogation rooms are in a sub-sub-sub-basement.
"Wait," Moonbow says. He pulls something from his belt, a little device. Presses a button.
"What's that?"
"Makes the wearer invisible to electronics."
"Nifty."
He opens the door a crack, checks to make sure there's no one here. Lucky for us the stairwell door opens near Room Nine. He goes ahead, opens the door, enters. I jump for the ceiling, across and down the hall, swing into the room. Maybe two, two and a half seconds.
Inside, Moonbow's already disconnected the surveillance camera.
We wait. Moonbow's not much of a conversationalist. After a while, he pulls out a cigarette case from a pocket inside his boot.
"You mind?" he asks me.
"Go ahead."
He lights up. I smell something I haven't smelled in a couple of years, not since I came to this alternity.
"That's not a normal-" I start to say.
"The non-addictive tobacco your buddy Doc Sterling developed? Never tasted right. Surprised anyone recognizes the original smell."
"Where did you-"
"Grow it myself."
"Lot of work."
He shrugs. "Only smoke a couple a week. A crop lasts me a while."
He smokes and I pace.
"Relax," he says eventually, crushing the cigarette under his boot.
"Yeah, easier said than done."
The door opens and Knight's standing there with Johnny Giggles. Johnny's wearing the prison yellow jumpsuit with the bar code across the chest, same bar code on his back. Handcuffs and ankle chains. He smiles when he sees us.
"Darling, I knew you'd come to rescue me! How are the children? Shaken, not stirred?"
"Sit down, Johnny," I say.
"No hug?"
Knight makes him sit. Locks the chain for his cuffs to the table.
Moonbow and I look at Knight until he leaves.
"So, who brought the cards?" Johnny says, grinning.
"Not here to play games, Giggles," Moonbow says.
"Come on, how are we going to play Strip Go Fish without cards?"
I lean back on the table next to Johnny. Moonbow paces behind me, slow, like a predator trapped in a cage.
"We're here to talk to you about your boss," I tell him.
"My boss?"
"You know, the one who paid you to deliver that bomb."
"Which one? There's been so many."
"Why don't you tell us about the most recent one."
"Why should I?"
"Useless. Doesn't know anything."
"Now, Moonbow here thinks you don't know anything about the man who hired you. The one pulling the strings. But me? I think you're smarter than that. I think you wouldn't take a job like that without knowing who was pulling the strings and signing the cheques."
Johnny sighs.
"Honestly, Squirrelman. Appealing to my ego so soon? Where's the flirtation, where's the seduction? Should I just bend over now?"
He makes to get up and bend over, but he's chained.
"Unfortunately, you'll have to undo my pants. I'm a little tied up at the moment."
"Okay Johnny, how's this?" I hot-squeeze out my claws in front of him, out-in real quick. Then I grab him by the throat, hard. I look him in the eye. "Now, I know whatever we do to you, you'll just regenerate eventually. I know this, because I did my research."
He's not even trying to fight back. He looks bored.
"See, I know you'll regenerate, and I know you don't feel pain like normal people. But I'm betting it'll take a while for you to grow your larynx back, and I know for a fact you love the sound of your own voice."
He just looks at me. He's starting to go a little blue, so I let go. He coughs.
"The bomb," Moonbow says.
But Johnny's looking me in the eyes. Trying to see if I mean it. I'm not sure what'll happen if he's a better poker player than me.
"You heard the man," I tell him.
"You two... you amuse me. Your approach is heavy-handed, Squirrelman. But then I guess you're used to the heavy-handed approach, with that frigid bitch girlfriend of yours," he smirks, then makes a jerking-off gesture.
I try really hard not to let exactly how much I want to tear this asshole's throat out from showing.
Johnny laughs.
"See? My admittedly crude insult was as heavy-handed to you as your interrogation techniques seem heavy-handed to me. Spare me your pathetic attempts at psychobabble and threats and get to the point. What do you want me to say, and what do I get if I say it?"
"Johnny, we've got people working on your bomb right now," I tell him. "We're going to find out if it was a dud or not. And then we'll know who your boss is."
"My boss, my boss! Who? You want me to name names? You don't go far in my line by naming names, mask."
"Don't need one."
"We don't need a name, Johnny. We have one. Why'd you dummy the bomb?"
"The bomb?" The change of topic catches him off guard.
"Why is it a dud?" I ask.
"Do you honestly think I'd deliver a bomb that was a dud? I have my reputation to consider."
"You wouldn't risk killing your boss."
"Wouldn't I?"
"Money," Moonbow says.
"He dies, you don't get paid."
"You masks, you're all the same. 'Follow the money.' Honestly, not a one of you understands art. None of you can appreciate my work. You think everything I've done is for money?"
"I don't think the hundreds of people you've killed are in a position to appreciate your work, either."
"Okay, first of all? It's thousands, not hundreds. Second? My victims are the in the best position to appreciate my work. They're the only ones who can, you see. I took them from their humdrum lives, their beer-swilling, their mind-numbing television watching, their petty concerns, and made them famous! The victims of Johnny Giggles, greatest serial killer in history!"
Moonbow goes over the table, kicks Johnny to the floor, steps on his throat.
"Listen up, you twisted fuck," Moonbow says through gritted teeth. I've never seen him so mad. "You didn't make them somebody. They were already somebody. And no matter how many people you kill, you'll always be a nobody."
I pull him off, push him into the corner. Johnny's coughing on the floor, trying to laugh.
"You guys... you make me laugh," he says as I pull him into the chair. "I'll tell you what. I'll give you one for free. If you're checking the bomb, you'll find out soon enough. It wasn't real when I got it, but I made it real."
"That what you said in the restaurant. So why didn't you rig it so that disarming it would trigger it?"
"I like the way you think, Squirrelman. But there wasn't anything in it for me to play the tri-fecta."
"Tri-fecta?"
"Triple cross, genius."
"Triple cross who?"
"I thought you didn't want a name, mask. Sure, why not? Any information I give you is worthless. Haven't you heard? I'm insane." He grins that huge nutjob grin, laughs and shrugs. "Konstantinopoulos. Now get out of here, I've got a manicure in fifteen minutes."
There's a knock at the door. Knight opens it.
"Time," he says.
Moonbow and I leave the way we came in. He doesn't say anything on the way out. Neither do I. A couple blocks away, I say, "Yes!"
"What?"
"We got him," I say.
"No."
"What do you mean? Johnny Giggles implicated Kosmos Konstantinopoulos with... what, reckless endangerment, at least!"
"A crazy maniac mentioned a name under duress. That's not proof."
"So what is it?"
"A solid lead. That's all."
Shit. He's got a point.
"Yeah," I answer. "Yeah, alright. So now what?"
"Now?" he asks, then gives me a lopsided grin. "My store needs opening."
I look at him. He shows me his watch. It's nearly eleven.
"Not everyone's independantly wealthy."
"Sure," I tell him. He nods and heads off.
He's right. I head home, change into civvies, head for the office. No one's there, on vacation like I told them to be. I'll bet half of them are polishing up their resumes. I spend the day sorting out things in my office, cleaning up from Squidface's attack. No word from any Leaguers all day. Around five, I head out. Get on the bus, like old times.
That's where I see the newsfeed.
Senator Mazzuchelli of New Jersey is calling for the repeal of the Claremont Act.
Squirrelman and the Crimefighters' League survived the week from hell, dealing with a massive prison break, having had their secret identities exposed to the world at large, gang wars, hideous creatures from beyond, two new super-criminal groups - the Implacable Foes and the Revolutionists, a trip to the Costumer, and an alternity invasion from the Negaverse.
For their many good deeds in the name of law, order, and justice, Mayor Ross-Carter invited the Crimefighters' League to become the official powered branch of the Action City Police Department.
Wayne Masters, the Midnight Avenger, offered the Crimefighters' League a home and a headquarters both - stately Masters Mansion, his ancestral home.
While comparing cases, the Crimefighters' League agreed that their priority had to be the troubles Downtown. Squirrelman split up the League into five teams, each with their own objectives. He and Moonbow would interrogate the brilliantly insane serial killer, Johnny Giggles...
Starring!
Matt Mattheson ......... as Squirrelman
Kimmy Sinclair ............... as Ragdoll
Jackson Archer ............ as Moonbow
with
Reed Sterling ....................... as Doc
Julia Sterling ................... as herself
Joe Sterling ....... as SuperTwin Red
Jerry Sterling .... as SuperTwin Blue
Jeannie Sterling .............. as Zephyr
When I wake up, Kimmy's already dressed - the League shorts and tshirt combo that the Costumer put together for her, her blonde hair in short twin braids. She puts on the mask while I watch.
I know there's lots of folks talk about the fetish of masks. Whatever. It has an affect on me, it has an affect on Kimmy, it works for us both, we don't make a big deal out of it. Still, lying there naked under the sheets while Kimmy puts on her work clothes is a turn-on, and it shows. She just gives me a smirk, comes over, kisses me long and hard. I'm about to pull her back into bed when she breaks away with a flirty grin.
"Tonight," she says, winking. Then she's out the door and I head for the shower.
I get out, get dressed - my spare Squirrelman outfit, the last one I have, League jacket, mask in one pocket, goggles in the other - and head for the kitchen. Julia and the twins are already up. I pour myself some coffee while the twins talk about sports and the news. Jeannie sleep-stumbles in, mumbles something, and pours herself some coffee, lots of milk and sugar. It's a normal morning in the Sterling household. I half expect Doctor Apocalypse or the Starslayer to come crashing through the wall any second.
But they don't. Julia's making pancakes for everyone so I eat up - not too much, or jumping from trains and rooftops won't go over too well. No sign of Reed, either. Looks like nothing is going to save me from making the phone call I don't really want to make.
Once my dishes are clear I thank Julia and tell them I'll see them tonight. I find a vid in a private room and dial the Mayor's direct line. It's early but the whole town knows she's in at six AM and out at ten PM.
The vid connects and I hear her aide answer.
"Yes?"
"This is Squirrelman. Let me speak to the Mayor."
The video feed comes through. Her aide, the guy whose life we saved on Friday, gives me the hard stare.
"How do I know you're Squirrelman?"
I hold up my Action City Costumed Crimefighter Identity Card, activating it.
"Patch me through to the Mayor."
"Very well." He's got the gall to sniff prissily. He can't meet my eyes, now he knows it's me. Like I'm the one made him piss himself.
The vid feed changes to the Mayor's face. She's got new glasses.
"Squirrelman."
"Mayor."
"What can I do for you?"
"My team and I talked over your offer," I tell her. "Sorry, but the answer's no."
"Very well. Good luck."
"Thanks, Mayor," I start to say, but she hangs up first. Bitch.
On the way out I run into Reed. He looks like he hasn't slept all weekend.
"Hey Doc. What's up?" Old jokes die hard.
"Quite a lot, actually." Not even a smile. Not good.
"Such as?"
"The disappearance of the Harvest clone, of course. The situation Downtown. The datahack. Everything. If that wasn't enough, there's a Senatorial committee that's asked me to meet with them in Washington this morning."
"Really. That's sudden."
"No, they contacted me Friday night."
"Well, good luck."
"Thanks. What're you up to, today?"
"Moonbow and I are going to question Johnny Giggles."
"Holy socks!"
"Yeah, I know. Be careful, etc."
"No, I mean- well, yes. But also, I've had the opportunity to speak to him. He's incredibly intelligent. If you're not extremely careful, he'll play you."
"I've interrogated crooks before, Doc."
"Giggles is no normal crook, Matt."
"Okay, I got you. Listen, I've gotta go."
"Sure, so do I. Can I give you a lift?"
"No, I want to run out some kinks."
"Okay then."
I head out the front doors into Sterling Plaza, making sure to pull on my mask before I get out of the elevator. There's a tour bus out front and they take a couple hundred digipics as I jump over them, catching a ride on the underside of a passing aerocar. The Sensational Squirrelman, something to tell the folks about back home.
Aerocar to el train, el train to rooftops, meet up with Moonbow outside ACPD HQ. He's wearing his old costume, no hint of the League uniform. His choice.
"Hey," I say, landing next to him.
"Just gonna walk in there?" he asks. Not much for small talk.
"I've got some resources," I answer. We walk around the block, climb a fire escape, across the buildings back toward the HQ.
"Now where?" he asks.
"Now I go to the can," I say, leaping across the alley between us and the HQ. Up the building quick as I can, air vent comes loose, inside in less than three seconds.
Through the air ducts, find the vent I want, and wait.
Not long. He's about due to start his shift. I hear him come in, talking to someone outside about a case. The door closes. The familiar sound of a man at a urinal. Check it, make sure it's him - tall African-American guy, thin-ish, slightly balding, nice suit.
I open the vent, lower myself so that I'm squatting on the edge of one of the stalls, close the vent and say, "Detective Knight."
I have to hold back a laugh when I see him jump. Not funny, not really. Immature. But fuckit, I'm glad I'm wearing the mask again because it hides my grin.
"I hate when you do that," he says to me.
"I know."
"You'll forgive me for not turning around?"
"Take all the time you need."
"What do you want?"
"Me and a buddy need to talk to Giggles."
"Are you fucked in the head?" he says, turning halfway to try a look at me.
"Mind your shoes."
"Fuck!"
"And no."
"Yeah, well, I need a month vacation somewhere where topless native girls bring me drinks with umbrellas in 'em."
"I can't do anything about that, Knight. But you can help me."
"Oh yeah? How?"
"Tell security you need to question Giggles about one of your cases."
"First of all, he's not implicated in any of my cases. Secondly, security needs about a dozen forms signed in triplicate to move him to an interrogation room."
"First of all, you're homicide. Secondly, bullshit."
"Yeah, it's bullshit, and you know why? Because Giggles is bugfuck!"
He finishes up at the urinal, zips up, turns to face me.
"And you're bugfuck too if you think I'm going to let you interrogate someone they've already executed four times. He's immortal, a genius, and completely insane. Whatever you need to ask him about, it's-"
"Konstantinopoulos."
That shuts him up so fast I actually hear his teeth clack. He thinks about it for a second or three, eyes narrow behind his glasses.
"What."
"The bomb at the Cosmos Lounge."
"Yes?"
"It's Praxis tech."
"So?"
"How did Giggles get it? How was Konstantinopoulos able to disarm it so quick?"
"From any number of explosive supply thefts. Because he's a genius and it's his tech."
"Think, Knight. Giggles said he improved the bomb. Rewired it. If he had actually rewired it, why didn't he rewire it so that disarming the bomb actually triggered it?"
"That's twisted."
"That's what he'd do."
"Yeah."
"So we need your tech guys to check out the bomb, make sure it was actually set to go off at all."
"What are you saying? The CEO of Praxis Technologies got Johnny Giggles to bring a dud bomb into a ritzy Uptown restaurant? Why?"
"Public relations."
"No, I figured that, thanks. Why would Giggles do it?"
"That's why we need to talk to him."
He's thinking, nodding. "Yeah. Okay."
"Where?"
"Room Nine. It's at the end-"
"I know where it is."
"Okay."
"Hey Knight?"
"Yeah?" he answers, turning around to wash his hands and wipe off the mess he got on his shoes.
"I've always wanted to ask, you related to Knight, from Knight and Daye?"
"Yeah, he's my cousin," he replies sarcastically. "We don't talk much, except at family reunions."
This is the part I love. He's got his back turned, his attention on his shoes, I open the vent and sneak out while he's still talking. When he turns around, I'm gone.
"I hate when you do that, too," I hear him say to the otherwise empty room. I have to clap a hand over my mouth to hold in my laugh.
Back outside, Moonbow's waiting.
"It's set."
"Getting in?"
"We're Action City Costumed Crimefighters, man. We just walk in the front door."
Which is what we do. We don't even get a second look. Moonbow's got to leave his bow and arrows at the security checkpoint, but other than that, no one even questions why we're there. I'm actually a little surprised.
"Problem?" Moonbow asks as we head for the elevators.
"Just disappointed in their security," I answer quietly.
"Don't be. Typical."
"I guess."
On the way in, I spot a familiar face on the way out.
"Hey, Jimenez," I call to him.
"Hey, Squirrelly," he says. Him and his partner, Simonson, come over, nod to Moonbow.
"Went back to the mask, huh?"
"Yeah, felt naked without it, you know how it is," I answer, waving a hand at the helmets they're carrying under their arms.
"Yeah," Jimenez laughs.
"Hey, Jimenez, let me talk to you for a second."
"Sure."
He and I leave Moonbow and Simonson to stare at each other.
"What's up, Squirrelly?"
Quick check, make sure no one's watching us.
"I need to get to the Interrogation level."
He just looks at me. Up until I saw him, I wasn't sure how we were going to get there.
"What are you asking me to do, Squirrelman?"
"Just swipe your security pass on the stairwell door. That's all."
He thinks about it for a second, looks away. Nods.
"Hey, Simonson!" he calls. "Go warm up the cruiser. I'll be there in a sec. Gotta take a piss."
Simonson says "Sure thing," and heads off. Moonbow comes over, we follow Jimenez over to the stairwell, pretending he's leading us to somewhere for something. No one's watching.
Quick swipe of his security clearance card, the door opens, Moonbow and I are in. I tell Jimenez I owe him one as we slip in. He doesn't say anything, started walking away as soon as the door was open.
We go down six, seven flights of stairs. Interrogation rooms are in a sub-sub-sub-basement.
"Wait," Moonbow says. He pulls something from his belt, a little device. Presses a button.
"What's that?"
"Makes the wearer invisible to electronics."
"Nifty."
He opens the door a crack, checks to make sure there's no one here. Lucky for us the stairwell door opens near Room Nine. He goes ahead, opens the door, enters. I jump for the ceiling, across and down the hall, swing into the room. Maybe two, two and a half seconds.
Inside, Moonbow's already disconnected the surveillance camera.
We wait. Moonbow's not much of a conversationalist. After a while, he pulls out a cigarette case from a pocket inside his boot.
"You mind?" he asks me.
"Go ahead."
He lights up. I smell something I haven't smelled in a couple of years, not since I came to this alternity.
"That's not a normal-" I start to say.
"The non-addictive tobacco your buddy Doc Sterling developed? Never tasted right. Surprised anyone recognizes the original smell."
"Where did you-"
"Grow it myself."
"Lot of work."
He shrugs. "Only smoke a couple a week. A crop lasts me a while."
He smokes and I pace.
"Relax," he says eventually, crushing the cigarette under his boot.
"Yeah, easier said than done."
The door opens and Knight's standing there with Johnny Giggles. Johnny's wearing the prison yellow jumpsuit with the bar code across the chest, same bar code on his back. Handcuffs and ankle chains. He smiles when he sees us.
"Darling, I knew you'd come to rescue me! How are the children? Shaken, not stirred?"
"Sit down, Johnny," I say.
"No hug?"
Knight makes him sit. Locks the chain for his cuffs to the table.
Moonbow and I look at Knight until he leaves.
"So, who brought the cards?" Johnny says, grinning.
"Not here to play games, Giggles," Moonbow says.
"Come on, how are we going to play Strip Go Fish without cards?"
I lean back on the table next to Johnny. Moonbow paces behind me, slow, like a predator trapped in a cage.
"We're here to talk to you about your boss," I tell him.
"My boss?"
"You know, the one who paid you to deliver that bomb."
"Which one? There's been so many."
"Why don't you tell us about the most recent one."
"Why should I?"
"Useless. Doesn't know anything."
"Now, Moonbow here thinks you don't know anything about the man who hired you. The one pulling the strings. But me? I think you're smarter than that. I think you wouldn't take a job like that without knowing who was pulling the strings and signing the cheques."
Johnny sighs.
"Honestly, Squirrelman. Appealing to my ego so soon? Where's the flirtation, where's the seduction? Should I just bend over now?"
He makes to get up and bend over, but he's chained.
"Unfortunately, you'll have to undo my pants. I'm a little tied up at the moment."
"Okay Johnny, how's this?" I hot-squeeze out my claws in front of him, out-in real quick. Then I grab him by the throat, hard. I look him in the eye. "Now, I know whatever we do to you, you'll just regenerate eventually. I know this, because I did my research."
He's not even trying to fight back. He looks bored.
"See, I know you'll regenerate, and I know you don't feel pain like normal people. But I'm betting it'll take a while for you to grow your larynx back, and I know for a fact you love the sound of your own voice."
He just looks at me. He's starting to go a little blue, so I let go. He coughs.
"The bomb," Moonbow says.
But Johnny's looking me in the eyes. Trying to see if I mean it. I'm not sure what'll happen if he's a better poker player than me.
"You heard the man," I tell him.
"You two... you amuse me. Your approach is heavy-handed, Squirrelman. But then I guess you're used to the heavy-handed approach, with that frigid bitch girlfriend of yours," he smirks, then makes a jerking-off gesture.
I try really hard not to let exactly how much I want to tear this asshole's throat out from showing.
Johnny laughs.
"See? My admittedly crude insult was as heavy-handed to you as your interrogation techniques seem heavy-handed to me. Spare me your pathetic attempts at psychobabble and threats and get to the point. What do you want me to say, and what do I get if I say it?"
"Johnny, we've got people working on your bomb right now," I tell him. "We're going to find out if it was a dud or not. And then we'll know who your boss is."
"My boss, my boss! Who? You want me to name names? You don't go far in my line by naming names, mask."
"Don't need one."
"We don't need a name, Johnny. We have one. Why'd you dummy the bomb?"
"The bomb?" The change of topic catches him off guard.
"Why is it a dud?" I ask.
"Do you honestly think I'd deliver a bomb that was a dud? I have my reputation to consider."
"You wouldn't risk killing your boss."
"Wouldn't I?"
"Money," Moonbow says.
"He dies, you don't get paid."
"You masks, you're all the same. 'Follow the money.' Honestly, not a one of you understands art. None of you can appreciate my work. You think everything I've done is for money?"
"I don't think the hundreds of people you've killed are in a position to appreciate your work, either."
"Okay, first of all? It's thousands, not hundreds. Second? My victims are the in the best position to appreciate my work. They're the only ones who can, you see. I took them from their humdrum lives, their beer-swilling, their mind-numbing television watching, their petty concerns, and made them famous! The victims of Johnny Giggles, greatest serial killer in history!"
Moonbow goes over the table, kicks Johnny to the floor, steps on his throat.
"Listen up, you twisted fuck," Moonbow says through gritted teeth. I've never seen him so mad. "You didn't make them somebody. They were already somebody. And no matter how many people you kill, you'll always be a nobody."
I pull him off, push him into the corner. Johnny's coughing on the floor, trying to laugh.
"You guys... you make me laugh," he says as I pull him into the chair. "I'll tell you what. I'll give you one for free. If you're checking the bomb, you'll find out soon enough. It wasn't real when I got it, but I made it real."
"That what you said in the restaurant. So why didn't you rig it so that disarming it would trigger it?"
"I like the way you think, Squirrelman. But there wasn't anything in it for me to play the tri-fecta."
"Tri-fecta?"
"Triple cross, genius."
"Triple cross who?"
"I thought you didn't want a name, mask. Sure, why not? Any information I give you is worthless. Haven't you heard? I'm insane." He grins that huge nutjob grin, laughs and shrugs. "Konstantinopoulos. Now get out of here, I've got a manicure in fifteen minutes."
There's a knock at the door. Knight opens it.
"Time," he says.
Moonbow and I leave the way we came in. He doesn't say anything on the way out. Neither do I. A couple blocks away, I say, "Yes!"
"What?"
"We got him," I say.
"No."
"What do you mean? Johnny Giggles implicated Kosmos Konstantinopoulos with... what, reckless endangerment, at least!"
"A crazy maniac mentioned a name under duress. That's not proof."
"So what is it?"
"A solid lead. That's all."
Shit. He's got a point.
"Yeah," I answer. "Yeah, alright. So now what?"
"Now?" he asks, then gives me a lopsided grin. "My store needs opening."
I look at him. He shows me his watch. It's nearly eleven.
"Not everyone's independantly wealthy."
"Sure," I tell him. He nods and heads off.
He's right. I head home, change into civvies, head for the office. No one's there, on vacation like I told them to be. I'll bet half of them are polishing up their resumes. I spend the day sorting out things in my office, cleaning up from Squidface's attack. No word from any Leaguers all day. Around five, I head out. Get on the bus, like old times.
That's where I see the newsfeed.
Senator Mazzuchelli of New Jersey is calling for the repeal of the Claremont Act.
Kidding, kidding!
I see Dr. Johnny Fever - er, Giggles - and I share an opinion or two about Ragdoll.
t!