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Monday, November 26th, 2007
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| Subject: | The Signal Can't Be Stopped |
| Time: | 11:32 pm. |
| Mood: |  angry. |
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<<BZZZZZZZZ!!!> JAXXON BACK ON LINE <<!!POKE 123345, 9, 0!!//
//BEGIN TRANSMISSION
//
// TODAY I OBSERVED EARTH UNIT VERONICA AMBULATORY AT APPROXIMATELY 2MPH. ABDUCTION COUNTDOWN TIMER RESET. VERONICA UNIT MUST LEARN NUMBERS - INCLUDING DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ZERO AND NULL - BEFORE TAKING MY PLACE AS HEAD OF WORLD CRUSHING GALACTIC BATTLE STATION.
// IN GOOD NEWS, VERONICA UNIT TRIED TO ENSLAVE DOG UNIT BY PLAYING RESTRAINING DEVICE, NO DOUBT USED TO INFLICT TORTURE, AROUND THE DOG UNIT'S NECK. DOG UNIT ESCAPED WITH HELP OF WIFE UNIT "Jennifer'" MUST BE INVESTIGATED FURTHER.
//VERONICA UNIT RELEASED SEVERAL STINKY DIAPERS FULL OF CRAP. i COULD SMELL THEM ALL THE WAY UP HERE IN THE STATION. VERONICA UNIT APPEARS TO SUFFER HER DIAPER CHANGINGS WITH SOME GRACE AND DIGNITY. THIS MUST BE ADDRESSED IMMEDIATELY. STARTING COUNTDOWN TO NUKE LAUNCHER.:
//9123419939129321-93-122-12--343543555
//9123419939129321-94-122-13--3435WE35
//9123419939129321-95-121-12--343543555
//9123419939129321-95-121-12--343543F45
//WHEN THE COUNTDOWN REACHES NULL.... YOU WILL ALL PAY! EXCEPT VERONICA.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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| Subject: | INTERGALACTIC SHPPING COMPANIES SUCK |
| Time: | 11:30 am. |
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BZZZZT! BEGIN TRANSMISSION!
YOU KNOW, ITS HARD TO FIND A REPUTABLE INTER-GALACTIC MOVING COMPANY. SURE, WHEN YOU CALL AND SAY YOU WANT TO MOVE YOUR INVINCIBLE SPACE-POSSESSIONS FROM GALAXY A:QUADRANT 744: SECTOR 7B TO GALAXY B:QUADRANT 34X-K11: SECTOR 3A THEY TELL YOU ITS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT AND ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM. BUT THEN YOUR STUFF DOUBLES IN MASS AT THE WEIGH-STATION (WHAT PERCENT OF LIGHT-SPEED WERE THEY TRAVELING AT?!!) AND THERE ARE ALL SORTS OF CHARGES BEFORE YOU DROP THEM OFF. AND YOU MIGHT WANT TO BLAST THEM WITH YOUR MISSILE-LAUNCHER ARMS, BUT REMEMBER YOU HAVE NO HANDS AND SO CAN'T UNPACK THE TRUCK YOURSELF. SPACE-DAMN! WHEN MY INVINCIBLE SPACE FORTRESS IS COMPLETE AND I'VE UNPACKED THERE WILL BE A SPACE-RECKONING, I'LL TELL YOU THAT!
BZZZZZZT! END TRANSMISSION
BEEEEP! PS. I'D LIKE TO SHOUT OUT TO MY MINION CURRENTLY STAYING AT THE TINY EARTH NATION OF GERMANY. PAVE THE WAY FOR MY INEVITABLE REIGN!
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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| Subject: | HAVE ARRIVED IN QUADRANT 34X-K11 |
| Time: | 4:02 pm. |
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BZZZZT! BEGIN TRANSMISSION:
I ARRIVED IN MY NEW HOME, QUADRANT 34X-K11 YESTERDAY EVENING VIA COMMERCIAL CARRIER. PERHAPS NOONE BUT A SUPER SPACE ROBOT CAN TRULY APPRECIATE THE IRONY OF HAVING TO TAKE AN ORDINARY AIRPLANE WHEN YOU NORMALLY INHABIT AN INVINCIBLE FLOATING SPACE FORTRESS. NOT TO MENTION THAT MANY OF MY MINIONS ARE THEMSELVES PLANES. BUT THE TRUTH IS, WHEN YOU FACTOR IN FUEL COSTS, ITS MUCH CHEAPER TO FLY THAN TO WARP SPACE AND TIME AND FLY THRU HYPERSPACE TO GET THERE.
I HAVE A FEW DAYS BEFORE I MOVE INTO MY NEW INVINCIBLE SPACE FORTRESS. THERE'S MUCH TO DO BUT RIGHT NOW I FIND MYSELF THINKING OF GETTING SOME SPACE-COOKIES.
BZZZZT! END TRANSMISSION.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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| Subject: | MOVING TO A NEW INVINCIBLE SPACE FORTRESS |
| Time: | 12:56 pm. |
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BZZZT! BEGIN TRANSMISSION.
SUPER JAXXON HATES PACKING. HAVING HOMING-MISSLE LAUNCHERS INSTEAD OF HANDS, ITS GENERALLY EASIER TO BLOW UP THINGS THAN TO WRAP THEM IN BUBBLEWRAP. LUCKILY I HAVE MANY MINIONS IN TINY SHIPS WHO ARE ABLE TO HELP.
MY NEW SPACE FORTRESS IS IN A MUCH NICER LOCATION, AND IT FLOATS, SO ITS A WASH THAT WAY. AND OF COURSE IT IS STILL INVINCIBLE.
I HOPE THE MOVERS ARE CAREFUL WITH MY FULE TANKS, INTERCEPTOR MISSLES, GUN EMPLACEMENTS AND RADAR TOWERS. THE SATELLITES ARE ONLY WORTH 300 POINTS SO ITS ALMOST NOT WORTH SHIPPING THEM.
BZZZZT! END TRANSMISSION.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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