Landon Leedy

Heres the D.L.

IT'S A FUCKING GOOD DAY!

Man it's been a wail since I’ve been on LJ. Life’s just too busy. Anyways I don't have much to say so just look at this until my next post which shouldn't be as spaced out as the last : )

May 24th, Alkaline Trio - Crimson

So my sister Kimberly is trying to find me a job in San Diego California. I totally want to go live there and go to school there. Plus leaving here seems easier now than it ever did before. I just need a place to go make new mistakes with new people in a new environment with new feelings and surroundings. I want to meet people and try to fall in love again. This time without pot and excessive booze... I want to be fully independent and not have any ties to my family and I don't want to be baby sat financially anymore. I need a new place to play my music and new people to play it with. I need to close my eyes and be there already... SO I feel the life of adderol coming... I took an evaluation I've been ADD since i was like born. kind of sucks. it's been forever since I've posted and this is such a random rant. SO I'm done. Have a good night livejournalites.

My day has been good. I've done nothing but sleep in and sit around my house. Brian and Adam came over to get the drum set a bit ago. thats all my people contacts for the day so far. I love time to think. I have such a busy life and I never feel allowed time to just sit and organize my thoughts. Today has been good for this. Played guitar, wrote a little bit, day dreamed a little bit, grew up a little bit. I just need to keep myself updated. I need to let go of my childhood and take hold of my adulthood. I should have everything in place by my 21st birthday. Thats all that matters to me.

( Blah Blah Blah... )

I worked a double shift today. It wasn't so bad though. For the most part I had an awesome day. It's just little things that make me happy, that way I can over look the big things. Speaking of little things, thanks for the note katie it seriously made my whole day!

I've been thinking about what I need to keep my focus on. My family is one thing that never has direction or focus. My family as individuals have direction and focus but as a family there is just DNA, short phone calls, home and miscommunication. This should be worked on. I need to stay focused on my education. I should never have stopped going to clark, thats the one thing in my life that is so dumb and fucking stupid. I've been flipping coins on whether I should allow myself to start seeing people or not. I know that girls, love and sex are things that guys think about to much. But I don't think about it at all unless I'm with other guys and I have to, or when I'm drunk :) then it comes out a bit excessively. Maybe I should stop drinking? maybe I should stop smoking pot?... NOPE! One thing I am proud of is not smoking cancer sticks for 4 days now. So ladies, just to warn you, this sexy guy has now doubled his attractiveness due to " clothes smell good now, breath is fresh 24/7, also I have more energy."
I had a bunch of guys chase me through the burnside fredmeyers parking garage telling me my ass and face were hot, then the guy riding shot gun started singing to me.... AW... So sweeet! I told him he had a beautiful voice then with vigor I took off. It was one of those "AWKWARD" moments where you just want to be un human and have alien babies pop out of your stomach and fall to the ground dead just to break the tension.

                                                                                    

( Can't duck it? FUCK IT! )

My house looked like ground zero the morning after. My furniture was moved around the house, beer every where, puke on my floor, alcohol spilled everywhere, bottle tops hidding in every nook n' cranny, people passed out anywhere and everywhere. GOD DAMN. It's now sunday 3:01 pm and I still feel like shit. I keep trying to figure out whether or not I had fun...?

I'm throwing a party at my place, you guys should show up drink and eat stuff with me. So get on your birthday suits and oil up like a little piggy and get your ass out here. It'd be cool if people brought beer over because I'm poor. Also anything hard would be nice. I can supply a bit but not much.

Questions? I've got answers so call me @ 213-3776

Fucking awesome week... Thats all I can say. I need this weekend to be good, I know it will be.
I drove to jessica's brothers apartment today, I needed to see him. I miss him dearly. It was a good visit. I drank a bunch of coffee with rian and smoked 12 cigarettes tonight. I'm starting to get nervous and I couldn't figure out why. I know now that I have words that need to be said and I know that I will not be able to speak them. The worst part is knowing the most important day for me is coming right up, but it can no longer be important and it feels like death, the kind of death that is lonely and bitter. (People here are asking after you and it doesn't make it easier) If you went away, would I find you? If you walked down the wrong path, would I follow you and carry you back to the beginning? If you died, would I live? I used to know the answers to these questions, now I know that it's not as simple as just an answer; These questions are not relevant?

Just some bullshit on my mind tonight... It will probably linger and pollute my thoughts for the next couple weeks...

The important part of this journal is knowing that I'm happy and full of positive energy regardless of what unfinished ends are in my life.

Okay from now on, no more venting on my livejournal. WHATS THE POINT? REALLY? Like I said I'm happy and full of positive energy. Now I must sleep so I can be tomorrow.

Oh man, I had fun shootin the shit with jeffrey smith last night! We had some deep conversations, I'm glad that we can express our opinions on life and random issues so openly to each other. I had a good conversation with Katie the other night too. I don't know, whenever I have a good conversation with some one I feel freakin radical the whole next day!
Today I woke up at Jeff n' Atoms place, I had a good time with them last night, Drove home laid around, talked on the phone, then drove my mom to work and met up with steve to have lunch. We ran into chris day and his friend zach and ate some good teriyaki together and had good small talk. Now I'm back in battleground and waiting for atom and steve to call and were gonna drive out to ptown, hopefully get a hold of misty and do whatever we feel like.

Tomorrow's Mardi Gras! Fuck yeah! Give me a call if you wanna do something, I'm up for anything.

( Every Sperm Is Sacred )

So, I just had three days off. Now, I'm going back. It sucks.
Anyways the purpose of this entry was to give everyone my cell # (360) 213-3776
Yeah, thats all, call me whenever I don't really care what time it is, if I don't want to talk I'll turn my voice mail on.

I was thinking about it, when I turn on music, I turn it up as loud as I can get it. When I'm with my family I just put on head phones sit at the computer and crank those little ear pieces until my ear drums are throbbing. It's like an escape for me, everyday I have to deal with my shit and I have no sound track of my own, so I make one. I sing a lot at work, people think I'm a freak, I just stand back in the kitchen and sing the songs that pollute my head. I feel like a kid with a dirty room (I am a kid with a dirty room) my head is filled with these random unorganized thoughts and issues and instead of having each of them put away and labeled. I navigate through my head by kicking and tossing shit around. It doesn't feel like a bad thing though, it's just how I am, makes things more interesting. I guess I have it together. As much as anyone else. Often I think I'm a born genius, as far as how to live, but that’s a bit conceded. Everyone just has there own way of living and that’s why everyone is so different and unique. Why am I talking about all this shit on LJ? So I was talking to my mom about my problems because that’s what kids do, right? I've never really talked to my parents about my problems. My parents don't play a big part in my growth as a human anymore. They haven't in a wail, not that they are bad parents or bad people, because there some of the best I've met. really. Just I'm not a good son, I don't let myself get connected to people, not even my parents. We talked about how I have problems talking to people and how I can't stop being unhappy even when I try my hardest to be positive. I told her about how I hate myself and how I don't feel like I'm a valuable part of the human race and how I try to fix everything and how it never works. She didn't have to much to say. She never does (She is a listener). She asked me if I needed medication! HHAAAHAHA, oh fuck that shit dude. Something to think about I guess.
Last night was fun, I was a bit baked and didn’t do much of anything but vegetate. STEVE fucking rules! Weed food is fun. Adam Fox, your hookah is, OFF THE HOOK’AH!

Vancouver, you need to die. It would be glorious to drive around the whole city with gas cans dumping fuel all over the asphalt! Actually it's not to bad of a little town, just right now I'm fed the fuck up with it. I miss my sissy! I get to visit her in Cali next month if all goes as planned, which things never do these days. But none the less I'll keep a small flare of hope in the matter. I've been reading Lord of The Flies as of late, it's an excellent book. I'm sure most of you have read it and already know this. I have not. I just ate 3 fucking cookies and a half a glass of milk! that makes me sick! I'm sorry to all porkers out there, but to me there is nothing lower than a person reaching there arm into a damn cookie jar. MUST INDULGE! MUST CONSUME! Last night I watched my dad eat like 5 or 6 cookies in one sitting! That’s a fucking meal! OF COOKIES! SICK SHIT! What is a cookie? Bread? Cake? NO. Cookie! I'm done! I'm so mad at life!

Have a nice time, doing whatever it is you'll be doing.

So last week me and Atom got drunk. Um. This will explain how I felt about the night...

I just pierced my ear... The cartilage... I'm bleeding... I'm waiting for some ganja... I took the stud out of my ear... I'm dizzy... I'm going to drink more orange juice... I think I'm going to start not having a cold soon... Have a nice day...

I'm sitting here with a steam inhaler attached to my face, I've been so sick for so long and my mom suggested that I use it to break down the infection that's been building up around the sides of my throat all these days I've been sleeping away. Good job mom, your a true pro!

                                                                                                

                                                                                                   Gaze at it's majesty

I created a myspace tonight... It's so shitty... I've not had time to do much to it. But I'd like to get some people on my friends list. So here's the link: I'm a damn snake charmer</p></font>

So, I fucking hate my job. I didn't hate it to much before. But now I want to kill the people I have to say yes to. The past two months my schedule has been less than unsatisfactory. My hours are not bad but my shifts are always bouncing around and never land two days off in a row. The best I get is having to close, then open, then close, then open, then have a day off (Thurs. not like sat. or sun.), then open again. The least they could fucking do is give me a set pattern of shifts that I can work. But no, it's never the same and constantly changing throughout the month. ONE FREAKIN' DAY OFF A WEEK! BULLSHIT MOTHER FUCKERS! Then comes the reason why I now hate rather than dislike my job:( Reasons )

( (The End) )

Whelp tip one back because it's flu day. Beer and Nyquil is the only cure for us guys who don't have sexy girls to cuddle with. Looks like this is going to be my fifth day in a row of just sitting here in battle ground feeling like shit. I sher would enjoy the company of a lady. I guess I could always order one from the UK! Eh..eh..? *nudges you*

Well I'm kinda loopy from this medicine and beer, so, pardon my grammar or spelling or um offensive things I might say... Time to write some songs... I have tomorrow off... So yes, music writing it is... Or maybe someone'll come out to visit me... Or maybe I'll drag my virus spreading ass to your house and breath at you in close proximity... I guess I'll probably catch up on some sleep that I've been depriving myself of for so long. Give my brain a day off. Nyquil is this shit, I feel the music in my temples...

 

     +   = SLEEP

there is a time in ever mans life when he has the most intense dreams ever... I dreamt me and all my friends went on a night bike ride which turned into a huge bike race through some town that seemed oddly familiar. I remember Rain and Adam S. flew ahead and when I caught up they were making tons of noise on the back porch of an apartment complex. the person on the second floor started screaming out the window. We then started riding away as fast as we could. We ended up on a basket ball court in the middle of a park, I played some tether ball and tried to karate kick it and totally got hit in the nards. As I lay there the race began again so I jumped up and tried to catch up with them. All of the sudden I'm on a pirate ship and there is this large guy with horns and a huge round stomach that had some hair but he looked like he was oiled up, oh and his lower body was a goat! Anyways he was obviously a bad guy and an excellent bowler! He was bowling cannon balls from his ship to ours! and on our shit the guy in the artillery room opened the shaft and when he saw that his eyes got huge! he then grabbed what from my angle looked like a cannon ball and wound up for the toss, but he never let go he just flew with the cannon from his ship into the door way of the artillery room. then I realized that it was no cannon it was a huge octopuses, It opened one eye at a time then I looked up and the big fat guy was staring right at me with his horns and that’s when my mom yelled at me to get up and I ate some crapes! I'm sure both dreams had a lot more detail but that’s the magic of dreams, you can never remember everything.

So that was random, I'm going to get ready for work...

Happy new day! I think new years eve is a joke but I like to party so I can't complain. I had a blast last night being the belligerently drunk Landon that I was. I guess it's cool to look back a few years and see how far everyone has come. All the people who have touched me, all the decisions I've made, all the times that I thought were never going to end, and all the people I've had the privilege to be around. It's crazy to see the progression of life.

Nathan already posted this picture but I'm going to as well. It's Nathan and me in one of the happiest moments of my life, back when I didn't have so much drama dragging me down.

HELL FUCKING YES! 24 hour flu is so much cooler than the longer kinds. Except in order for it to last 24 hours you have to experience the whole flu in 24 hours instead of being span throughout a week. So it proved to be one of the worst days of my life. You stupid fuck Scott! I hate you and your stinky ass B O that soaked into my skin and killed my immune system! If anyone I've seen gets sick in the next two days. You know it's from me. I'm sorry.

  hotdamn...