Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in sliceyj's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Saturday, February 5th, 2005
7:04 pm	Off to the Knights' I've been going into Manhattan at least once, if not twice a week recently. Man, it's a long haul. But I've been making a point to get out and experience life more. Life has definitely been more interesting over the past few weeks, and more fulfilling. But it's such an inconvenient commute. It's not so bad going into Manhattan, but the thought of coming back to Queens late at night, exhausted, and having to take a subway and two buses to get home makes me feel tired before I even go out. The express bus unfortunately stops running at 10 pm on Saturday nights. Tonight, I'm heading to a party in Harlem. I'm gonna take the express bus halfway and then hop in a cab for the final stretch. Since I don't know Harlem well, I feel better doing it this way instead of walking around Harlem alone at night. I know I can't skip out on this party. I have no excuse, as the host would say. Right now, I'm cooking some chicken for dinner, and I'm probably gonna leave in an hour or so. I have no idea when I'm gonna get home...or how. Oh, well. It usually seems to work out somehow. 'Till tomorrow! (Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 18th, 2005
10:04 pm	Day and Night Today was a pretty good day. Work is starting to pick up due to the return of the students for the Spring 2005 semester. They're returning tomorrow. I feel like I'm managing a lot of events this semester; I hope I didn't take too much on. Happily, I finished the Access database I was working on. It isn't exactly the spectacular, feature-ful database I had envisioned, but it works really well and is just about ready for use by my co-workers. Yay! Today, two of my appointments were middle-aged, foreign-born men trying to build successful careers in the U.S. Both were in the same field, and both were very intelligent. Both had strong accents and needed some practice with English, the first with diction, and the other with writing. It was funny; one of the guys has been an adjunct French professor for a number of years, and whenever I corrected his grammar in his cover letter, he had a reason why he had used the grammar (wrong) that way. He had a reason for everything. At one point, regarding one example, I just had to say: "I don't know how to explain why this way is correct, I just know it is, being a native speaker of English." And he finally agreed that my way was correct after I tried to explain it 50 different ways. Then he proceeded to give me one of his poems, to prove his writing skills, which after one glance was very beautiful but kind of suggestive. It was based on the character of Amanda in the movie "Let's Make Love." Anyway, being in a professional situation, I had no idea how to react, but I decided to say "thanks" and not make a big deal about it. I actually tried to slip it in between his cover letter and resume and quietly give it back to him, but he found it and gave it back to me. *Sigh* I could have just come out and told him that I couldn't take it, but I really didn't feel like his intentions were sexual at all. I felt it was more him showing me his talents. The other guy I saw today was pretty dejected when he came into my office. I coached him a bit and assured him that he had great qualifications and helped him to see his options. By the end of the appointment, he was like a different person, much more hopeful and enthusiastic--and smiling. This is what I love about my job. It feels so good to help bring other people up when they're overwhelmed and only see closed doors all around them. Plus, even though most of the students I see are traditional college-aged kids, working with middle-aged and older adult students, like today, has different dynamics than working with younger students because they bring much more life experience to the session. And working with international students is generally fascinating overall. Many of them are such resilient hard workers despite hardship and other obstacles, and it can be very inspiring. As I walked this second student out, he taught me a few things about Spanish grammar. It was fun! So things are picking up at work. I don't plan to make discussing my appointments publicly a habit, but if I do, I'll always respect their anonymity. Not that many people read my blog anyway. But I just wanted to share a taste of my experiences at work are generally like. I've decided that I need to exercise more. Tomorrow, I'm gonna go check out this women's gym in the area. It sounds awesome. It's right down the street and has a pool, sauna, jacuzzi, aerobics and yoga classes, a weight room, treadmills, spinning classes, and other cool stuff. No scary hairy roly-poly stinky possibly sociopathic men in the jacuzzi with me here. (Yes, this happened at the Y a few years ago!) There was also a naked immigrant woman following me around the locker room at the Y as well, but that's different story. It'll probably cost, but that's okay because if I go regularly, then I get a reimbursement of $200 per year from my health insurance company. The gym wouldn't give me a price quote over the phone, but they invited me in to try out the gym for free and get a price quote then. Another sign that it probably costs an arm, a leg, and my first-born son. But checking it out never hurts. Getting tired, bed is calling. Sweet dreams, until next time... (Comment on this)
Monday, January 17th, 2005
4:11 pm	Back from Beyond I can't believe I haven't posted here since August 2004. Well, I take that back, I CAN believe it, seeing as though my Fall 2004 semester was CRAZY busy. As I mentioned a few months back, I taught a college course for the first time as well as managed my first full semester in my full-time position at the University. I organized two huge events only 1 week apart from each other and used ALL of my free time to plan lessons for the course. It was an insane time management challenge but worth it in the end. The experience of teaching a college course was extremely eye-opening. "You don't know what you don't know," probably sums it up. And the only way to learn what I don't know was to actually do it. All in all, it was a very good experience. I enjoyed it despite my tiredness, nervousness and sometimes lack of knowledge on how to deal with certain situations. College students are MASTER excuse fabricators (myself included, when I was a student). One student actually told me the night before the final that he couldn't take the final because he had broken his hand three months earlier and it hurt when he wrote too much. I gave him a very unattractive alternative option involving taking a different version of the exam during winter break. The next day, he sauntered into the final and said, "I decided to stick it out." HA. I also had one student try to negotiate her grade with me up until the very moment grades were due. I really liked the intellectual challenge of planning the course, though with my somewhat transient concentration, I found it a bit stressful. It should be easier next time, though, now that I know what to expect and now that I'm a better researcher. On the personal front, my beau and I broke up on January 8th, 2005. We made it through my crazy semester and the holidays but felt it was right to end our relationship. We are both seeking more of a connection. Even though I enjoyed his companionship, I still felt somewhat empty with him. We do have some similar interests. And we have similar values. And our Myers-Briggs types are similar. And we have similar Holland Codes. BUT there were things missing. I won't go into the details here, but I feel like I need more of a connection, more conversation, more curiousity. Someone who has a lot of interests and pursues them. Our breakup was mutual and amiable. I still feel sad. However, I am welcoming the opportunity to work on some things I need to work on myself. Speaking of the holidays, they were first good and then not so good. Christmas was pretty enjoyable. I did the "divorce shuffle" between families (which was a challenge without a car). First, we had a pre-Christmas dinner with two of my aunts and two of my uncles, two of my cousins, my grandparents, my dad and step-mother. We also celebrated my Dad's birthday there. Then my grandmother read "The Night Before Christmas," and it was downright heartwarming. A year ago, she was in a wheelchair and didn't talk much, and we didn't think she would recover from her experience with cancer in her spine. Now, she walks confidently with a cane, eats well, and is back to her old self personality-wise. What a wonderful, strong woman. She and my grandfather are who bond us together as a family. I don't look forward to what will happen when they pass. Will my extended family stay close? Then, on Friday (Christmas Eve), I went to my mother's place to celebrate with her and my step-father. We went to their golf-friends' house for a small golf-community bash. I wasn't happy with the bottle in the car, but I have no control and protest would cause WWIII. Anyway, we arrived at the party, and I wasn't really feeling up to socializing with all these people I didn't know, but I pretended as well as I could. This young, somewhat effeminate, animated guy kind of zeroed in on me because he heard I live in NYC. We talked for a bit, and then my sister sauntered over to join the conversation. She becomes very extraverted at parties and is very entertaining. Then my mother came by and put in her 2 cents. After noticing that there were several babies at the party, she made sure to good-naturedly let us and everyone around us know that SHE WANTS GRANDCHILDREN, too. My sister and I then argued about who would have them first. I bet on her. And I still bet on her. She clearly wants children, no denying that. Then my allergies started up. Maybe it was dogs, cats, whatever in the house...maybe it was emotional. I really didn't want to be there, trying to impress my mother's golf friends. We stayed much longer than my mother had originally promised because she didn't want to be rude and leave. So we ended up eating dinner there. Finally, we went back to her place and opened presents. An hour later, we ate dinner again--cavatelli and meatballs/sausage, the original dinner my mother had planned. Over dinner, we had a fairly frank conversation (a somewhat rare experience) which left me feeling good. The next day, we opened presents with my Dad in the morning and then headed over to my aunt's place for Christmas dinner. My Dad and step-mother were having dinner with her family at my Dad's place, and my sister and I were invited, but we decided to spend Christmas with our side of the family instead. Dinner at my aunt's was excellent--turkey with trimmings. My cousin spilled candle wax on my aunt's wood floor, but I managed to scrape much of it off with my fingernail. As you can see, I am a girly-girl. Kidding! After dinner, my sister and I headed back over to my Mom's and had ANOTHER dinner. See a pattern? This time, we had tenderloin. My step-father is a wonderful meat cook. Then next day, my mother and I went to the beauty salon. Now, I am not a salon girl, but ah well, it was a bonding day with my mother. I got my face waxed, or should I say ripped off, and my nails done. Next, we went and had soup at some Panera-type place. This may have been the suspect meal, one will never know. Keep reading. I had been planning to go out to dinner with my Dad for his birthday that evening, and my beau was driving down from Boston to meet me and drive me back after the dinner. However, we heard that a bad snowstorm was about to hit Boston, so we decided to drive back to Boston without staying for my Dad's party. The way back was treacherous. The roads really sucked, and they were not plowed. I was glad to finally make it to my beau's place, warm and dry. That night, we snacked on cheesecake and watched Shrek 2. Christmas was over, time to relax. The following evening, I got really sick, followed by my beau 2 days later. It was not fun. The same day I got sick, my mother was hospitalized for her heart. Being really sick, I was powerless to go see her. We had planned to go to a New Year's dance party/competition over the weekend, but my beau was not recovered enough by the time that rolled around, so we didn't make it. Plus, I got really stressed out about my mother. On Saturday (New Year's day), I went back home to CT. It felt good to be home. I had alot going through my head, and I needed emotional and physical R&R. Spending time with my Dad really helped a lot. My Dad and I have great in-depth conversations about relationships and philosophical things. It is so healing to me. I went to visit my mother, who was at home by this time, and feeling much better. By the way, she is doing fine. I am so thankful! I even took one more day off of work to spend in CT. Then I went back to work. It was good to be back in a routine. Since I was sick, I've been doing a lot of thinking. A lot of thinking about what I need, how to get it, and being honest with myself. Thinking about making changes, living healthy, what makes life worth living, all of the above... More later... (Comment on this)
Friday, August 6th, 2004
12:23 pm	Lots to write, not much time! First, it is a frikkin' gorgeous day outside. I should be out there now, but I have to work on the workshops I'm giving this Saturday and Sunday at the Leadership weekend. That's why I'm posting in my blog. :-) Damned procrastination! Let's see, two weekends ago, my Dad drove down to visit me in NYC. Go, Dad! Despite the long bridge, he still did it. We had a great time; it was really nice to spend some time with him, showing him around my area. Last weekend, my boyfriend and I went to the Maine exchange. The weekend wasn't 100% logistically smooth (i.e., getting locked out of our dorm at 2 am, etc.), but we still had a great time. Portland is a beautiful city. I felt that despite all my time off during the summer, that was the first actual vacation I had. Cajoled by szarka, I signed up for this online thing called OKCupid. I didn't know what it was at the time, but the little online tests tempted me. They're fun in my spare time. Turns out that it's a free matchmaking service, matching friends, lovers, long-term boyfriends and girlfriends, etc. I've been answering questions and taking tests on there, and while a lot of the stuff is accurate, some of it doesn't make me appear quite the way I want to. When I first signed up and answered a few questions, it said, right on my profile page, "sliceyj is less sexually driven than most other women her age." What? Anybody who knows me knows I'm not a nun. TMI, for example. Maybe it should say that "sliceyj didn't sign up on this website to get a good shag." That's more accurate, since I'm not single. Anyway, it's been amusing, and the questions they ask really make ya' think. As for work, things are really picking up! My mind is in vacation mode, so it's been tough to feel too motivated to work hard, but I know I will have to. This will be an incredibly busy semester. I'm excited, but scared, because it will be a huge initiation into my professional field. Because I've been in my head so much, it's been tough to let loose while dancing. Of course, when I'm in touch with my body, it's always tough to get back into my head. Lately, this has been more true with all the planning I've been doing! Hopefully after this semester, the learning curve will have lessened, and keeping a balance will be easier. Well, I have more stuff to say, but I've gotta run and do my work. Going to Quebec City and Albany next week! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, July 11th, 2004
7:43 pm	Recent goings on It's been so long since I last wrote. I'm not a very systematic blogger. But I'm loyal, even if I only update once a month. Where to start? A number of things have happened since I last posted. Let's see...I got the DNY teaching position at the University (you know, the one I posted about earlier?)! Yippeeee!!! I'm psyched that I get to teach at the college level...the main challenge now is all the planning. Since every single one of my weekends is booked up through the third week of August, I'm gonna have to get my butt in gear and do most of my planning on weeknights. The course is going to include lessons and material on lindy hop...so it'll be fun for me...and also for the students, I hope! Next, I got 2nd place in the Northeast Lindy Hop Championships Intermediate Jack and Jill! Woohoo! This was my first time competing, so I had no idea what to expect. But the judges liked me and my partner, so we must have been doing something right at the moments they were watching us! Nearly 7 years, and I finally got up the confidence to participate in a Jack and Jill...and it was definitely worth it! My partner in the competition was a guy from L.A. who in some ways rather reminded me of SJ: his looks and sense of humor, mostly. I don't know him well, but I felt very comfortable talking to and dancing with him, probably because of that! Without a doubt, I am so glad I was randomly matched with him in the competition because he is a very clean, solid lead, albeit fairly new to lindy hop (but experienced in ballroom dances). All in all, this experience has boosted my confidence about my dancing and has inspired me to work toward getting better. This happened at Beantown last weekend. I attended just for the weekend, and my boyfriend stayed for the weekend AND the entire week. I had a very good time during the weekend, developed a new lindy crush hailing from CO, and generally felt empowered about my dancing. I felt very close to my boyfriend during the weekend (my REAL crush) and missed him a lot when I left. During the rest of the week, I spent time with my Dad and Step-Mother, my Grandparents, and my Mom and Sister. More on that later. Still trying to sell my car. Just got back from vacation, so hopefully it'll happen this week! Got eaten alive by mosquitos walking to the beach yesterday. Argghhh! Still itching, though luckily not as bad. They were so fierce, though, that one actually tried to bite me in the butt as I was in the bathroom. That bug died quickly (because I slapped it, not for the reasons you're thinking... :-). Anyway, gonna go. More later! (Comment on this)
3:40 pm	Hahaha. I've been having a great time on Ricki's blog. http://www.jobpredictor.com/ Jessica, Your ideal job is a Pole Dancer. (Comment on this)
3:35 pm	WARNING!!! PARENTAL ADVISORY SLICEYJ CONTAINS EXPLICIT LYRICS Username: From Go-Quiz.com (Comment on this)
Thursday, June 3rd, 2004
7:08 pm	Where have you been all my life? It's been a while. I haven't been writing much for the public; instead, I've been writing a lot in my journal, for my eyes only. And I can guarantee it's been juicy, real juicy. Haha, probably not. But it's stuff I need to write about and process away from the public eye. Things have generally been uneventful in my life. Lately, I've had a lot of time off of work due to holidays and summer Fridays off. Sometimes I love time off, and sometimes it's stressful having too much time off. I am much better at time management and getting things done when I have *less* time, so I'm not really getting any more done than usual. I applied to teach a course at the University in the fall. I was informally invited for an interview, which is a great sign. I'm really excited about it and hope it materializes! Work is still great though a little boring lately without the students and faculty around and without workshops scheduled. I'm selling my car as soon as I can pay off the balance, get my title and get some small repairs done. I haven't been without a car since I got my license 12 years ago, so it will be a huge change. The long commute into Manhattan in order to leave New York will be inconvenient, not to mention the usual (though much lesser now) a- factor which can sometimes make things unpleasant. However, I will try to be strong for the sake of paying off debt/student loans and becoming empowered over money...instead of letting money have power over me. Well, enough for tonight. I'll be back soon. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 12th, 2004
9:34 pm	Two roads diverged in a yellow wood... I'm trying to make a decision about what to do on Friday night. I have two choices: 1.) go see Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge, my favorite Bollywood movie, on the big screen (my current plans), or 2.) drive to CT to dance to the Paul Tillotson Love Trio, which everybody has been raving about...and sound like they'd be an excellent dance band. I already pretty much set my plans for Friday night, which include meeting someone at the museum (where the movie is playing). But I am being drawn to this groovy blues trio. I can't resist groovy blues. My only qualm about breaking my current plans for Friday night is that I really want to spend some time in New York on the weekends, so that I can build new friendships and meet more people here. I don't want to be away from NY every weekend because I won't have a life here... However...there is good music and dancing to be had... Decisions... (Comment on this)
Monday, May 10th, 2004
6:31 pm	A bus-filled weekend This weekend was a good weekend overall, but not without its SNAFUs. I spent Friday night looking for a friend in Astoria who I was supposed to meet but couldn't find. It turns out that we both had different ideas on WHAT we had decided about HOW we were going to meet. That was okay, though, since we ended up talking about it and figuring out what happened; plus, it gave me more time to get ready for my trip to Boston on the Fung Wah Bus early the next morning. The next morning, I trekked into Chinatown to catch the 8 am Fung Wah Bus. It took me just under an hour and a half to get there via city bus, train, foot, and horse and buggy. One of the swipe machines at a subway station ate all the money off my Metrocard. When I told a station attendant, he walked away giggling. That would not have been acceptable had he been someone with managerial power, but I guess it *is* pretty funny, the random stupid things that technology does sometimes. Luckily, there wasn't a lot of money on my card. I didn't pursue it because I didn't want to be late, but otherwise, I would have. About the bus--luckily I got there a half hour early because the line waiting for the bus was already about 30 people long. I was really glad that I booked my tickets online 5 days earlier as well. The ride up was fairly uneventful. The driver was defensive and got us to Boston on time. My boyfriend met me between Chinatown and South Station in Boston. It took us a while to meet because he kept getting stuck in traffic at lights and on one-way streets, and he couldn't find the name of the road I was next to on his map. Eventually, we found each other. Thank the technology god for cell phones. It was freezing in Boston...I mean compared to New York. I now know what my co-workers meant when they thought it was funny that I considered 40 degrees to be warm. My beau and I had a nice time celebrating his birthday. I gave my weekend to him and let him choose what he wanted to do. We went to Arlington and then to Walden Pond to walk around and then out to dinner. I didn't interject my opinion (too many times) when we were picking out movies after dinner, 'cuz he and I have somewhat different tastes in movies most of the time. I just let him choose. Then, the next day, we wanted to go to the park, but it rained. We wanted to go to the Newton Historical Museum (I was excited to learn more about Norumbega), but it wasn't due to open until 2 pm. So we danced a bit in his apartment (he showed me some Bal stuff) and had yummy leftovers from dinner the previous night. Then I took a nap because something in the food was like a major sedative to me (I think it's my sugar thing) after a really nice foot massage. Then, sadly, I had to leave as quickly as I'd arrived! The coming afternoon would represent an interesting lineup of SNAFUs. My boy dropped me in Chinatown for my return bus. Because I was early, I got on an earlier bus and left a few minutes before 3 pm, earlier than expected. The bus was full. A Chinese American girl sat with me. Everybody around me was on cell phones for the first half hour. The bus driver was on his cell phone...for almost the entire ride. A few times, the bus driver shouted at other drivers on the road, and was concerned that a lot of people were "cutting him off." At one point, he swerved so sharply that he just about lost control of the bus. We were literally on two wheels, beginning to jacknife on the highway. I was scared sh*tless. The girl sitting with me and I started talking, and she said that she'd already been in an accident with this bus company once this year. Both of us were really nervous. She seemed really cool, though, and we passed the rest of the time on the bus talking about our lives--her upcoming marriage, my boyfriend, our jobs, education, etc. She's moving to Minneapolis, MN, in a few weeks. I noticed that people around us were talking with each other more now instead of on their cell phones...I guess a little fear can really change people's priorities and bring people together. I was kind of sad saying goodbye to this girl, walking away, knowing that we'd probably never see each other again. We *did* make it back to NYC alive. I had been pretty nervous, but getting off the bus, I vowed to find a way to pay for my car as long as possible. Next, the long ride back to Queens. I had to put money on my Metrocard (since it had been eaten the previous day), and none of the 3 machines in the subway station were working. In fact, I stuck my Metrocard in one of them, and it sucked it right in and wouldn't give it back. This time, the damned machine ate my entire card! So I trekked to another subway station, got a new card, and went back to the original station. I just wanted to get home. I took the 6 train uptown to the E train, but when I got off, the MTA cops told me that the E train was not running. Aghhhhhh! So I got back on the 6 train and went up to the F train. I got on the F train, and I suddenly spotted someone I knew from my apartment building. She lives on my floor, and for some reason, we're always running into each other! She was there with her son, coming back from a mother's day dinner. She's a very gregarious person, and we immediately started talking. She introduced me to her son. It made my night to see a familiar face after trying for 6 hours to get home. They had parked at a nearby subway station and offered me a ride home. Yay! I still maintain that people in NYC are generally friendlier in a more open kind of way than people in Boston at first. Maybe this is only true since 9/11. Maybe it's truer of Queens than Manhattan. I don't know, but it's been my general experience. So anyway, my night ended well. I made myself a sizeable dinner of chicken, rice and vegetables. I talked with my boyfriend, my mom, and my roommate in Boston on the phone (we're getting more interest in the apartment!). I was glad to be home. (And of course glad to be alive after that bus experience.) More later, time to eat... (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 4th, 2004
7:11 pm	When there are just too many chips... While this sounds like it could have a deeper meaning or something, I actually mean it literally...I have several million bags of chips in this apartment, and I can't stop eating them! Several weeks ago, I worked at a Job Fair, and Frito Lay was there...you can just imagine the chip display they set up. And at the end, they gave me and my co-workers as many bags of chips as we could carry. Well, I brought them back to the office, but they didn't stay there for long. Some of them followed me home... And these aren't small bags either. They're the medium-sized 8.5 oz. bags. Please, please, please get them away from me...*crunch* Other than that, I've been pretty busy, so I haven't written much. I've also been feeling a little bit drained. I met a few people here in Queens, which has been nice, including a guy who I feel is definitely on a similar wavelength. I think he could be a friend, so I hope we get in touch again soon. It was fun hanging out with him...and refreshing. We went to Central Park and walked around and then had sushi and talked. I felt good at the end of the evening, and not so lonely. It's just so hard to make an effort sometimes, though. I've been putting a lot of my energy into work lately, since over the past month I've undertaken a bunch of important, urgent projects in addition to having student appointments. I really enjoy work, though. I just feel like I'm still adjusting to a new place, new people, etc. It doesn't feel like home yet. But then again, it took about 2 years before Boston ever felt like home to me. Gonna run out...more to come... (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 22nd, 2004
7:59 pm	Lazy Post: when you'd rather just answer questions... 1. IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE WHERE WOULD IT BE? "I have this image of a mountainous/canyonish area, i.e. lots of dramatic height changes... somewhere western so there are more red and brown rock layers than there are trees... up near the crest of one of the hills, overlooking the silence of nature as far as the eye can see, somewhere you can walk/hike around and get away from everything when you want to and get totally centered... the right kind of surroundings and view helps me to get focused. Maybe all this is one one side of the house, and the other side overlooks the ocean. (drool)" --Anonymous Dreamer, 2004 The above-quoted dream sounds good. Where would that be? Japan? Oregon? Hawaii? (Afterthought: Scratch that, red and brown rocks probably don't exist in Japan, Oregon or Hawaii. If you actually read the entire passage, slicey, you would know this. :-)) More practically, I think I'd like to live somewhere between the city and the suburbs, but since there's no extra room there, I'd probably just have to buy instead of build. Other than that, probably somewhere in the rural suburbs, or somewhere with meticulously cultivated Japanese gardens. 2. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? My "AND" shirt, my lavender hiking shirt, and my gray wool pants 3. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HIGH SCHOOL MEMORY? When I received a note from a boy saying "I love you" in 14 different languages. 4. THE LAST CD THAT YOU BOUGHT? Worldwide Underground - Erykah Badu 5. WHERE IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE? In my boyfriend's arms. Or out exploring. Or dancing, or at a nice, comfortable cafe talking with a good friend. Or when I'm really tired, in front of my computer. 6. WHERE'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PLACE TO BE? Stuck in traffic (I second that), on a plane, in a room with cockroaches 7. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED? Feet, upper back, middle back, lower back 8. MOST IMPORTANT, STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? Strong in mind. 9. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE IN THE MORNING? 'Bout 6 :30 am. 10. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE? Microwave 11. WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY? Being powerless. 12. If YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I *do* play an instrument: piano. If I could play another, it would be guitar, but I tried it and gave up 'cuz my fingers are just not long enough. Other than that, I would play drums, bass, trumpet, violin, and African blues flute. 13. FAVORITE COLOR? Blue/blue-green 14. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV? Neither, really, but I slightly prefer the stigma of an SUV to the stigma of a sports car. 15. DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE? I'm somewhat agnostic (though not entirely), so I don't know, but maybe. I'll see when I get there. 16. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK? Dear God, It's me, Margaret Ummmm...just kidding. That's a teenybopper book. I liked my science books, especially the "Space" one. 17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? Late summer, early fall. The transition is just beautiful, and carries with it a note of nostalgia and sadness. Especially when there is a light wind. 18. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE? To travel quickly without flying, i.e., to transport myself to other places automatically. 19. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT? Don't have one 20. CAN YOU JUGGLE? Not unless you want to see a bunch of balls rolling across the floor. :-) 21. THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO? Yeah. 22. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE DAY? A warm, sunny day that I can spend with someone I love, doing fun, spontaneous things like hiking, having a picnic, swimming, exploring a city, etc. 23. WHAT'S IN THE TRUNK OF YOUR CAR? Too many things to make excuses for. Plus more. 24. FAVORITE CAR YOU'VE OWNED (CURRENTLY OR IN THE PAST)? I like my current 2001 Nissan Sentra. 25. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? There is no contest. Sushi, hands down. 26. FROM THE PEOPLE YOU WILL EMAIL THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST? "The dreamer-types who like these questions as much as I did" 27. WHO'S LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Those who call me and say "I was about to respond to your e-mail questions, but I thought I'd call you instead." ;-) Oh, wait. I guess that's a response. 28. Who did you RECEIVE THIS FROM? Said Anonymous Dreamer :-) (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 15th, 2004
11:40 pm	Something in the water... You won't believe it, but I just learned that another friend of mine is getting married! This is 3 marriages within the next year or so. Wow! I would blame it on the water, but they all live in different parts of the U.S. ;-) Okay, so 'fess up...who's next? My sister? A certain someone with a Chinese girlfriend? A certain someone with a Brazilian girlfriend? C'mon, it can't stay at 3. Well, congratulations to all. I can't wait to see you soon! (Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 13th, 2004
11:30 pm	Splinters of the past... I was just thinking about how this weekend, I had a splinter encounter with my past, a past era in my life, in Boston. I don't remember why I was driving through Allston, but as I did, I looked up at the Harper's Ferry sign announcing the bands that were playing over the weekend. On Friday, Moon Boot Lover was playing. On Saturday, The Knot (formerly Slipknot) was playing. Omigod...two bands that I used to hang out with playing at the same venue during the same weekend! Before I started swing dancing in 1997 (and just after I first started), I was hugely into going out to see rock bands. At that time, I had a friend (whom I've since lost touch with) who had a "thing" for the lead singer of Moon Boot Lover. Several times, we stayed up 'till sunrise to hang out with this band, partied in hotel rooms with them, and hung out in the basement of Tammany Club in Worcester, MA, after their shows. My friend, a bit of a hippie, would good-naturedly twirl around the dance floor as they played and talk about how amazing the lead singer was. They were quite good...quite intense and driving...a rock and soul band. The lead singer went solo for a while, but it looks like the band is back together now! My life has changed so much since then, though. Once I began dancing, I realized that I prefer this more interactive, expressive sort of entertainment (lindy) to bopping to a band and wishing that I was somehow participating in the music. And I learned that I love soul and blues...and dancing to soul, blues and jazz. I of course would be interested in seeing/hearing MBL again, but I wouldn't make it a primary lifestyle. The second band, Slipknot (the local Boston/Worcester Slipknot, not the heavy metal Slipknot from the Midwest), has a different sort of history in my life. I dated a former drummer in that band...for about 3 weeks...with somewhat of a disastrous ending. I believe this drummer and I met at a Moon Boot Lover show, or was it Gruvis Malt? I can't remember. Anyway, we went out a few times and things moved really quickly. I drove with him, in the middle of a huge snow storm, to the Middle East in Cambridge, MA to hang out while he played his gig there...until something like 3:30 or 4 am. What a lifestyle not for me. I feel like general crap if I stay out until 3 or 4 am almost every night. (Though every once in a while, it's fun.) I learned that this guy had just ended a 4-year-long relationship several months before he met me, and because things were moving so fast between us, he realized he wasn't ready for another relationship so soon. It had been over a year since I'd had a relationship per se (other than casual dating), and I wanted one, but it just wasn't gonna happen with him. I felt immensely hurt for a good month, until I had a great conversation with an elder lindy hopper. He helped me sort out what I actually wanted in a relationship, and I felt clear and motivated to go for what I wanted, even if it was more difficult and required me to give up my pride and be strong about expressing my true feelings and about the possibility of being hurt - but at least being straightforward about what I wanted (this is a subject for an entirely separate blog). It was a pivotal conversation in my life. And the motivator was the hurt that I felt as a result of dating relations gone bad with me and this drummer. It really was a pivotal time in my romantic relationship life. I was 23. So there you have it...a sign outside Harper's Ferry reminded me of all this stuff. Life was so different then...a sort of bittersweet nostalgia...I'm very glad to be where I am now...with all that I've learned...but it's good to remember the roots every once in a while. (Comment on this)
Sunday, April 11th, 2004
10:21 pm	My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun It seems like everybody is getting married. I just got an invitation to my friend's wedding; she lives in Hawaii, and her wedding will be out there in May. Unfortunately, I can't go because I'm not allowed to take any vacation time during the first three months at my new job. Also, I'm not thrilled about the idea of a long plane ride. Being stuck in a metal box flying through the air for many hours scares me quite a lot. But the main reason is work. I think I'm feeling more ready to be able to breathe slowly and deeply and cope with my anxiety on a long plane ride. Or...at least I'm starting to feel that life is too short to let anxiety stop me from going to all the places I want to go... Anyway, I just learned of another marriage happening soon, in October: one of my best friends from grade school, junior high, and high school. She was my very best friend at many points. I don't expect to be invited to the wedding because we lost touch just over 3 years ago, but I still want to call her and congratulate her. Her mother told my father the news in church. My hometown is so small that news spreads like wildfire. I have been thinking about contacting her again for a while, but I haven't felt ready, especially since over the past few months, I was preparing for my move to NYC and my new job and spending lots of time with my new boyfriend. I think she (my old friend) still lives in Boston. This will be a good way to reach out to her and try to rekindle some kind of connection, even if we've both changed in various ways and have to redefine our friendship. Not too long ago, I used to be able to say that most of my friends, like me, were not married. However, that number is dropping; most of my friends from high school are now married (or are getting married), including an ex-boyfriend (and I'm sure others I don't know about). A number of my friends from college and beyond are not married at this point, but the number is rising. I haven't had the experience of mutually being ready for marriage with someone else, even though I personally have grown closer to being ready to share my life with someone. I feel like I learned a lot from my previous two relationships, even though what broke us up in a nutshell in both cases was differing values in one important way or another. Enough about that for now...I don't like to say too much in my blog...but if I trust you I'm pretty open, and I'll generally tell you my deepest, darkest, juciest thoughts and feelings in person...some can attest to this...you know who you are... ;-) (Comment on this)
Friday, April 9th, 2004
3:08 pm	Gad about Gladys... This is what my father used to call me when I was out all the time and never home...and this is what my Easter vacation is gonna be like... I drove back to Boston from NYC on Wednesday night. Been staying at my boyfriend's place since then. Then going to Maine to do some shopping and meet his parents tomorrow. Finally, driving to CT tomorrow night, and having Easter brunch Sunday morning with my Dad's family and lunch at my Mom's. Then I'm driving back to NYC on Monday. Man, I'll need a vacation from my vacation! And there are so many things I want to do, and unfortunately won't have any time... I'm on a public computer at the Oak Square (Boston - Faneuil Branch) Library, and the computer is now telling me that I only have a few more minutes on this computer. :-PPPPPPPP (You can imagine the raspberry I am directing toward this computer.) :-) Oh, well. Be back soon! (Comment on this)
Monday, March 29th, 2004
9:05 pm	Cheesecake I'll bet you're wondering if it actually *was* the best cheesecake in NYC. Well, it was good, but I have a lot more cheesecake to try before I decide if it's the best! Okay, you're right...it's just an excuse to eat cheesecake as often as possible. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
6:31 pm	I Would Die 4 U That's 4 Zen, for getting us such awesome tickets to the Prince concert in Boston! Okay, maybe I wouldn't die 4 him, but I would certainly consider kissing the feet of anyone who gets me access to Prince! Er...don't quote me on that, but you get the idea. ;-) I actually got tix for us, myself, but mine were in the nosebleed section, while his are in the Loge. This weekend, my boyfriend came down to visit. It took him about 4 hours to drive here via the alternate route, considering the fact that I-95 was/is closed in Bridgeport. That's not too bad, but he'd probably have gotten here in 3.5 hours had I not told him to go the wrong direction on the highway once he got to Queens. Bad me! Before he arrived, I smelled a somewhat strong gas odor around my oven. I opened it to release an alarmingly strong gas odor, so I called the gas company to come check it out. They came out, and alas, confirmed that I have a gas leak in my oven. So they turned off the gas to my oven, and left it up to me to contact the service people in my apt. complex on Monday to fix it. They're gonna replace my entire oven tomorrow. It was really nice to be with him for the weekend. On Friday night, we spent the remainder of the night in, catching up, talking, since I hadn't seen him for almost 2 weeks. On Saturday, we went into Manhattan to meet a friend of mine from my hometown in CT (who I've known since kindergarten!) and her husband, and we were about an hour late because we were stuck waiting for customer service at the bank for a REALLY LONG TIME. Anyway, we made it there, and had a fairly good NY deli-type lunch. On the way out, I bought a piece of marble cheesecake for my boyfriend and I to eat later because signs around the deli said "Best Cheesecake in NYC!" and it came highly recommended by my friend's husband, who is an NYC native. After parting ways with my friends, my boyfriend and I took a stroll down Avenue of the Americas toward Central Park. We went by the Rockefeller Center and Radio City Hall. Near the Rockefeller Center, people were ice skating on an artifical rink, and my boyfriend really wanted to join them. My boyfriend is a wonderfully kinesthetic guy. I, however, being very shaky on anything slippery, warned that he would have to hold me up the whole time or rush me to the nearest hospital. As a kid, I fell and hit my head on the ice several times, and once, I got a really painful concussion during which I had a hard time speaking or remembering anything and had the worst headache in the world. So you can imagine my fear. Anyway, I would've done it anyway, but we wanted to have some time Central Park before it got dark, so we continued on our way. We got to Central Park and explored a little bit of the southern part of it. We were looking for a nice, romantic spot to sit and eat our cheesecake, but all of the nicest spots seemed to be occupied. Finally, we were tired enough to sit anywhere. We chose a spot atop a rocky ledge, sat down, and just about passed out due to tiredness, despite the hardness of the rocks and slews of kids running around us. At one point, I looked up to see about five couples around us kissing, and wondered if there was something about that spot that was attracting couples. Maybe some kind of tantric energy? Later on that night, we went dancing at a venue organized by Hop, Swing & a Jump. We didn't know what to expect, being that I've only danced in NYC a few times (for major events only), but we thought we'd check it out. We were pleasantly surprised; it was a gorgeous space, the organizers were very friendly, the music was excellent, and I saw a few familiar faces originally from Boston as well as others from NYC that I've seen around but don't really know. It was an all-around great atmosphere. Unfortunately, I couldn't dance much because my hip felt somewhat damaged. Lately, it's been hurting a bit and seemed to get worse with dancing that night. So, I sat out most of the dances and didn't dance with anyone new. My boyfriend was really sweet and wanted me to have a good time, so he kept checking up on me and offering to leave with me if I wasn't having a good time. He is a wonderfully attentive guy. :-) Yesterday, we vegged out and relaxed until he left at 3 pm. I cried for a while after he left. Then I just numbed myself by diddling around on the computer for while, before becoming (almost) determined to figure out ways to go out and try to meet people here. This week, I'm gonna try to go out a few times. I'm just a little nervous about going out into Manhattan by myself at night, since I'm almost an hour from it via public transportation, with several transfers. I looked for stuff to do in Queens, but I haven't been able to find anything interesting yet. Time to go eat. Looks like another cheese sandwich... (Comment on this)
Thursday, March 25th, 2004
6:03 pm	Was it good for you? Was I what you wanted me to be? Yes, that's a line from a Prince song, and yes, I will be trying my a$$ off on Saturday to get Prince tickets for his Boston show!!! Work went decently well today, but I was exhausted and kind of in a fog because I went to bed too late last night. Not for any particular reason, but because I just didn't feel like going to bed. Of course, one always regrets that move the next morning. I have been procrastinating unpacking so badly. I must be disciplined tonight and get something done. Here goes... (Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 24th, 2004
5:37 pm	Dipping my toe... Well, it's been a while since my first post, but I'm back, and in Queens! I started my new job a week ago, and it's really been great. It's nice to finally have a job that I enjoy. After many years of exploring different fields, it is very freeing to have found something that I can see myself doing long-term. Which doesn't really feel like work. Which is really an extension of me. Why don't I post more often? Like the title, I am only dipping my toe in blogging, which I used to consider to be kind of voyeuristic. However, I really enjoy reading other peoples' blogs and think it can be a good way to get to know what someone is like without masks or keep up with a person's life without actually physically being there... I have been a frequent reader of Zen's blog on and off for a few years, and I have a lot of respect for the way he expresses himself in his blog...and also the community he has built around him. My hesitations about starting a blog are these: I don't want to say too much, but I don't want to say too little. I don't want to vomit everything I am thinking onto the page, but I don't want to talk about the weather, either. I also don't want to say too much about my experiences with other people because I respect peoples' privacy. But writing for me has been a medium for complete honesty in a world that asks people to be politicians. Honesty keeps me sane, but so does harmony. So I guess I must find a happy medium. As an aside, a friend of mine from Boston sent me some EVIL EASTER CHOCOLATES, which I can't stop eating...thanks! I love chocolate, but I can't stop consuming it when it's near, so chocolate is both the best and worst gift anyone can give me. But nonetheless, it was a very sweet, unexpected gift! It made me feel loved, when I've been feeling kinda' lonely by myself here in Queens. Just before I left Boston, my friend brought her baby boy over to visit one last time, and he was kinda' sick, so she took my towel home to wash it. When I opened the package returning my towel, the chocolates were hiding underneath it. Late Sunday night (or should I say early Monday morning), I received this bizarre phone call at around 1:40 am. I picked it up, and nobody was there, but I heard this weird chanting in the background that sounded like women saying, "Go! Go! Go! Go!" But I don't think it was real women; it was too even. It sounded electronic or computerized. All I can say is that it was very strange. But I was too tired to care much, so I turned over and went right back to sleep. I guess I will never really know. It could have been a computer glitch of some kind with RCN, or maybe this is normal...this IS New York City after all. My boy is coming down to visit me this weekend; I miss him a ton and am really excited! He wasn't able to come down this past weekend; he had conveniently scheduled a trip to Denver to dance while I was making the big move from Boston. Bastard! Haha...just kidding...no hard feelings...I know he'd have helped if he could. I scheduled my move after he had already scheduled and paid for his trip. But I did miss him. All weekend. My friends were really really helpful with the move and cheered me up significantly with their affectionate silliness, especially over dinner right after the move. One of my friends was with me all weekend. He's just awesome. The weather here was beautiful today; it was in the 40's...maybe almost 50, and warm! At work, they've been teasing me because I said it was warm last week when it was 37 degrees out. What can I say? I've lived in Boston for the past (almost) five years, where it finally gets warm (maybe) at the end of May, and winter winds whip constantly, making it feel much colder than the actual temperature reading. There's less wind here, so 37 degrees in NY is much warmer than 37 degrees in Boston. So cut me some slack until my blood thins out a bit. At that point, I'll visit Boston and probably freeze to death. :-) Well, getting tired, but I'll be back soon again sometime. More later... (Comment on this)