♥

I just made muffins off a recipe I found online and I improvised on the ingredients hahaha this should be interesting..yeah interesting...thats it...mahaha.

Now I need to go take a nap.

I have an eye doctor appointment at 7, meh :/. I'm going to try to get contacts this time only I need some sort of super sensitive contacts or else I don't think it'll be too successful. Plus, and this is probably wrong but I just wanna hurry up and get out so I feel like I don't want anybody to show me how to put them in. I feel like I should be like, eh, you can just give it to me and I'll figure it out heh. Well, I had them once before I don't think it should be too hard.

Hmmm, I wonder were Tara went to? Are you still there Tara? I was just wondering how you were? Be well, Tara, you hear, hehe :p ;o).

Why is there like three Big Shots communities?? And why has the MV community not been updated in forever, you'd think now more than ever it be like post after post, hmmm. Well, its not like I've posted there in a long long time either so..Heee I miss Vaughn too.

Such a weird birthday! I think I need to make some changes this year. I think I might take a nap first heh. I hope this doesn't fortell a weird year, like I need any more of those! Oh well I blessed I know this so I'll just shush up

I had a really crappy night last night :o(! I'm still kinda feeling it as well but I think today will be better, well I hope so anyway.

I have to post this later (when I have the time (unless its there already??) to pretty_music but for now:

Thea Gilmore - Pirate Moon

http://www.sendspace.com/file/oobo4w

So pretty!

It's a strange world, she thinks, standing in front of the window, looking out into the eyes of the city, into a face lit by colour flashes, born from the houses of the street. the schemes she sees through trees, from a distance, from an angle, like modern ghosts they look, curling, reddening, blackening, whitening the night endlessly, without beginning, without end

Hours later she is still waiting, for the morning, for the hours to bring the shadows back to the world, only to get absorbed again later, on the other side of the day, at the other side of the horizon - Dorothee Lang (rosemary / blackbird)

It doesn’t matter where you’ve been – how far
It doesn’t matter how run down you are
Or if there’s nothing perfect left in your heart
No, it all means nothing, it all means nothing, it all means nothing at all, at all - Tina Dico - In the Red

Geh I'm so bored! The thing is I was going to clean out my closet and try on stuff because some things don't fit any longer since there is less of me than last year thus things are loose that weren't before. So.. but I just don't want to. So I don't think I will.

Whats a jabber? I mean other than something I would name my pet shark (if I had a pet shark and wanted a pet shark ;p). I mean I don't think I want one and as far as I understand I can't have one since I don't have the proper client or something. I'm just curious..

I've been meaning to post here for some time but I haven't gotten around to it. First, it was the Ecology thing I had to write. Now I'm a bit distracted because there is so much noise (loud) around me. I guess it doesn't help that I also have headphones on with music blasting in my headphones loudly. In the advent of the crap I had to do today that I really didn't want to...but ultimately have to suck it up and do because I'm a big adult person now (I guess..heheh??)...and I suppose I can't ignore certain things. I made a good stuff list but its a bit short oh well:

Good things:
Blue Bunny ice cream cones (not only do they tast good but they have a cute name!)
Valerie Phillips photo (found via phispot I'd post but I don't have the link) for 125 magazine
all the amazing photographers on flickr
Elisa - Qualcosa che non c’è
dkim's art over at etsy // especially Airplanes (I think its called Airplanes)
Not working (today)
Free starbucks gift card // pretty free new glass heh
All the good food I'm eating lately

Ok that was more than I thought! Yay life! heh ;p

Sorry I haven't updated in ages. I hope its ok if I just read quietly in the background. I've always been more of a reader than a writer anyway. Sorry this was suppose to be my attempt at actually writing an lj entry I just can't seem to focus.

Oh there is a possiblity in the future I may have to take some medication :/. Which if so I'm not looking forward to in the slightest. I'm scared of the symptoms. Occasionally there will be an ad on tv for some random pill and the entire commerical is like 10 percent about the pill and 90 percent about the symptoms. Like symptoms may include blahblahblahblahablahablhayaddayaddaonandonandonandon. WTF? Sometimes the symptoms are worse than the ailment, good grief! So essentially it will cure/make better one thing but make something else worse cause it always sounds that way. Yikes!

I did not know this!:

March 14th. A "holiday" celebrated by math geeks everywhere. Pi is approximately 3.14, and March the 14th is 3/14.

Had I known I would have demanded a paid holiday and I would have stayed home and calculated things! Ahhh the things you learn from the internets!

Unforunately I don't have much to update on. I have a cold and its warm and I took some medicine that made me really really drowsy and when I woke up I'm like damnits all I want to do is sleep forever...

Other than that I lost some weight I didn't really know beause I don't usually weigh myself but I decided to out of nowhere and I'm like where the hell did thirteen pounds go? The only thing I can think of it is I can't really eat as much anymore like about one bowl of pasta and I'm done. I dunno I wasn't really making an effort to loose weight..

And I have to go..

Winter Solstice | Unknown

When you startle awake in the dark morning
heart pounding breathing fast
sitting bolt upright staring into
dark whirlpool black hole
feeling its suction

get out of bed
knock at the door of your nearest friend
ask to lie down ask to be held

listen while whispered words
turn the hole into deep night sky
stars close together
winter moon rising over white fields
nearby wren rustling dry leaves
distant owl echoeing
two people walking up the road laughing

let your soul laugh
let your heart sigh out
that long held breath so hollow in your stomach
so swollen in your throat

already light is returning pairs of wings
lift softly off your eyelids one by one
each feathered edge clearer between you
and the pearl veil of day

you have nothing to do but live

If I were inclined to make new years resolutions I would make a few that involve not obessessing, overthinking, worrying about things that don't matter. A lot of things don't matter but somethings do. As you get older aren't these things suppose to become clearer?

Lately:
reading in bed
falling asleep reading in bed
dvd watching
veronica mars
Shawn Colvin - These Four Walls
Mission Responsible - Michael Tolcher
Chai tea

Yesterday I made cookies with my mother even though I lost my baking enthusiasm awhile back but I did it anyway. I'm suppose to make something for christmas eve as well.

I don't really like my job and I'd like to get a better job at some point and and I don't really have anything else to say.

Also I love this song.

I have a wee little bit of a busy week ahead of me but nothing very bad. I have to wake up early though hmmm gosh its getting harder and harder to do that ayies. And I have a crazy sleeping pattern sometimes early sometimes late sometimes very late.

Anyway thanksgiving was wet and cold and I mostly spent it sleeping or reading, good times!

I still have nothing to say I'm just posting to a)point out how adorable my new icons are mawww and b)this song is perfect. Thee end

This was cross posted to the ideas to have community but I'm going posted here as well and general making lists is fun:

Ideas:

On world AIDS day (Dec 1) pass out a bunch of condoms

When its raining pass out umbrellas (I believe you can prob get fairly cheap umbrellas at a dollar store)

When it gets really cold out either a) find a bus stop thats really busy or even if its only a little busy and pass out hot cocoa/coffee/hot apple cider, or just pass it out anywhere.

make a mix cd/tape entitled musicans everyone should listen to and then pass them out to random people.

Send someone a ransom note (with clippings of the words you want to use instead of handwriting) instead of taking something leave them something instead <------- I think this idea has loads of potential but I think it could be more creative so feel free to interject your own spin on this.

Draw hopsoctchs on pavement (playgrounds, or on the pavement of an office building cause I'd seriously love to see a bunch of office employees on their lunch break/break hopsotching) or leave jump ropes in parks or office buildings cause again it would tickle me to no end to see a bunch of office employees double dutching on their break heh!

Grow your hair long enough to donate to Locks of Love http://www.locksoflove.org/donate_hair.php

Give blood

Name a star after someone with the international star registry or come up with a silly name for a star and then register it...http://www.starregistry.com

leave a disposable camera somewhere...

give free hugs...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4

make a list of your own words then make your own dictionary for it and ummm pass them out to people..

If you can knit/crochet make scarfs/mittens/socks/hats etc then donate them to a homeless shelter actually there are actually organizations that do this I just don't remember the names/links of these places.

throw glitter AKA faery dust over people and exclaim, "You can fly!!!1!, just think happy thoughts" heh

holy crap I want to be a professional idea haver when I grow up wooooooot!  Oh man someone do this stuff besides me, yay the little thing amuse me/excite me.

What should I do when I have off so far all I've done is gone to get coffee which was good actually but I put to much creamer in it so the taste of the coffee got lost meh but otherwise s'all good. Last week I didn't do much of anything cause I was still sick the sat before I made cinnamon scones yeehaw!  I feel like days off need to be extra special but then shouldn't all days be like that. 

keeping quiet
now we will count to twelve
and we will all keep still.

this one time upon the earth,
let's not speak any language,
let's stop for one second,
and not move our arms so much.

it would be a delicious moment,
without hurry, without locomotives,
all of us would be together
in a sudden uneasiness.

the fishermen in the cold sea
would do no harm to the whales
and the peasant gathering salt
would look at his torn hands.

All the children I know or have known are really smart.  For one they don't think about things too too much or at least they don't obess with things they just seem to go with what feels right at the time and if things work out then yay for them and if it doesn't they just start over or move on.  I don't know if this is true for all children every where but it certainly seems so for the ones I know. 

For my birthday I got some Nikki Mcclure posters...from buyolympia they are so gorgeous I can't stop looking at them maybe thats why I haven't update hahaha.  You should see how much stuff I have on my walls now and also the Dr. Seuss poem, Oh the places you'll go and Wild Gease by mary oliver because they are both incredible and anyway its only the best stuff ever.

I may be going to an aquarium some time in the future I'm excited if I get to touch a shark I'll be even more exited.  Actually I already did but I was exited then and I'll be exited again that shite never gets old. 

 

Its SO SO hot here oh my word is it hot!  My mom told me in a factory someplace around here it was like 130 degrees inside good grief!  Because of this (well mostly this) I keep getting these headaches and I get a lot of headaches anyway but headaches that last for like a couple seconds and then go away.  yuck.  I believe this called a tension headache little bastards ;p.  The past few days have not been good self-esteem days yikes.   I suppose I could go into it more but I think I'll just leave it like that.  Monday I talked to my sister and it was so good for me I think mostly because she made me laugh and I needed that...yay.

I came to a point where I
needed solitude and to
just stop the machine of
"thinking" and "enjoying"
what they call "living," I
just wanted to lie in the
grass and look at the
clouds... - Jack Kerouac

Yes!

 Not much going on other than I've got a cold :(.  You have no idea how many times I've sneezed today alone and I really don't sneeze that much.  I think I filled up a years worth of sneezes in one day.  Plus I'm starting to get a headache from blowing my nose so much so I probaby shouldn't be staring at a computer anyway. But! there are good things so:

Good things:

Toffuti ice cream sandwhiches
Burt's Bee's
Without a trace w/my mom
Pirates of the caribbean with my sister