One of my callers just sent this to my boss (and cc'd me):

[boss],

I am writing you this email to let you know that sarudy is an asset to your team. sarudy answered all of my technical questions and was very professional with regard to one of my clients websites.

sarudy knows how to put the customer first and that is an invaluable trait that many people do not have.

sarudy deserves this recognition and so do you for having such a competent staff member.

Keep up the good work!

Thank You,
[customer]

Always nice to have stuff like this to add to the personnel file.

Oh, hey, quickie PSA, if you felt the midwest earthquake today, you should go to the GSPS and report what you experienced.

In other news, the sore throat is slightly less painful, but otherwise my cold lingers on. Feh. I hate being sick.

So, a few stills of the costuming for Silken Floss have turned up on the net.

Apparently in addition from being transformed from a nuclear physicist/surgeon to an "evil secretary", she's also been turned into an evil secretary who's too stupid to remember to put on a shirt.

Note to costumers: A push-up bra under a suit jacket is not a retro look. It was a briefly fashionable look a decade ago, and it was incredibly tacky then, too.

Why, oh why, are they letting Miller desecrate Eisner's work?

New Gravity Press for the Office
Originally uploaded by Kit Kendrick

So, replacements were in order, after last week's traumatic theft. I was moping something fierce.

I needed a new way to brew tea at work, now that I actually own a fair amount of loose tea. I figured as long as I had to get a replacement anyway, I'd upgrade. This is a similar model to the InginuiTEA I have at home (that came from Adagio) except with a metal built-in filter instead of a plastic replaceable filter. This renders the teapot not microwave safe, but we have hot water dispensers at work anyway (and I could always nuke water in a mug if I had to.)

I hadn't wanted to wait for mail order, so I headed all the way out to Bridgewater Commons, as I'd heard there was a Teavana there. It was a bit disconcerting, as I haven't been there in ages, even though I used to be a regular. They're doing something scary with the food court and just enough has changed to throw me off.

While I was there, I saw Run, Fatboy, Run, which was rather sweet (done by the same folks who did Shawn of the Dead and Hot Fuzz).

new mug with lid, other side
Originally uploaded by Kit Kendrick

New mug with lid
Originally uploaded by Kit Kendrick

Apparently I was distraught enough that aiskon went out and found a new mug with a lid on it. (Not only did I lose a tea strainer, but the ceramic lid to my nice tea mug). She had to hunt around a bit to find one without any gilt, so it will be microwave-safe. I have absolutely no idea what it says on the side there. It's probably a poem about bamboo or something.

Thought I'd share this little email exchange we had at work...

Step 1, an announcement goes out from K that L has become engaged. The announcement includes a bible verse (in largish purple font, but I've spared you that):

( 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, 13 )

A few folks return generic congratulations. Step 2, S returns another bible quote:

( Ezekiel 25:17 )

I note, aloud, as S sits within earshot of me, "Ahh, S, I'm not sure that's thematically appropriate." He replies, "Well, as long as we're exchanging bible quotes...". Several more generic congratulations trickle in.

Step 3, one of the team leads adds:

Team – While I’m happy that we congratulate and celebrate our individual successes (personal and work-related), let’s please remember that we are a diverse group of people with many different beliefs (religious, ethic, etc.). Please keep your work e-mails professional and neutral.

Thanks… and Congratulations to L.

S is kind of an ass, really.

A Passionate Donut
Originally uploaded by Kit Kendrick

So says the happy email:

As Passion for Winning week is end, we would like to thank all those who participated and special congratulations to all of the WINNERS!

On this last day, we wanted to share in delicious treats and inspiring thoughts. However, there are a few rules that come along with each treat.

Again, thank you for your participation and HAVE FUN!!!!!

-- The Passion for Winning Committee

I did not win, but the donut is its own reward.

A Passionate Quote
Originally uploaded by Kit Kendrick

• There is no peeking at the bottom of the plates until you have selected your own and are back at your desk
  
  
• Each treat is accompanied by a "Winning Quote of Inspiration".
  
  
• Each person must take one donut and its plate.
  
  
• At the bottom of the plate you will find a quote that should be shared with other team members.
  
  
• A few of these plates have very special messages.
  
  
• Should you find that you have the "special message" plate be the first to find myself and say "Week Passion Happy For"

I'm actually still mopey about the missing tea-strainer, by the way. Feh.

One of my cubicle neighbors just dropped in to let me know she liked a turn of phrase I used in a call. I'd called a sales representative to ask him to call a client who hadn't realized what one of the products he'd ordered did and doesn't deal well with the unexpected. The rep asked me if I'd explained what the product did and that it's generally a good thing. I told him "I tried, but he reacted like I was speaking to him in Martian. Actually, he reacted like I was cursing at him in Martian..."

(Fortunately, as per my clever plan, the customer had time to (a) calm down and (b) absorb what I'd explained by the time the sales rep called him to go over his order, and all is now likely fine. Some people just have a brief flip-out period that needs to be waited out before they can deal with new data.)

So, now whenever someone give you the "I don't understand what you are saying, but I am upset by it anyway" reaction, you can say "He thought I was cussing him out in Martian." And then you can credit me, and I will become famous, or something. And then, I dunno, a goddess or something.

They do this to us every year.

( This Week's Theme )

So I have a Learning Tree course next week which will be taking me into Manhattan Tuesday through Friday. I'll be at One New York Plaza from 9 to 4:30.

Anyone interested in getting together for dinner or something one of those nights?

I mean, aside from some lingering con crud from Katsucon. But I wasn't really any sicker Friday than I'd been Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.

From: Building Services
Sent: Friday, February 22, 2008 4:47 AM
Subject: Delayed Office Opening - Fri Feb 22

Due to inclement weather, the ... Office will open at 10:00am today, Friday February 22nd. Thank you.

From: Building Services
Sent: Friday, February 22, 2008 12:31 PM
Subject: Early Closing

Good afternoon, The ... Office will be closing at 1pm due to the inclement weather. Thank you.

Because I'm totally psychic and knew that was going to happen, and there was no way I was going to drag my sick self out of bed, excavate my car, and drive through horrible conditions, just to be sent back home. I think not.

The folks who made it in did get free pizza for lunch. I don't really think pizza would have made it worth it, though.

I came in this morning to find this in my email inbox:

From: Corporate Services
Sent: Tuesday, February 12, 2008 9:37 PM
To: ALL
Subject: Delayed Office Opening - Wed Feb 13
Importance: High

Due to inclement weather, the [...] Office will open at 10:00am on Wednesday February 13th. Thank you.

Corporate Services

There was a similarly themed voicemail, also timed at nine-thirtyish pm.

Guess when I got these messages? If you guessed "when I got into the office on time", you get a gold star.

*headdesk*

Bill would make it illegal to feed the obese (USA Today)

House Bill No. 282, which was introduced this month, says:

Any food establishment to which this section applies shall not be allowed to serve food to any person who is obese, based on criteria prescribed by the State Department of Health after consultation with the Mississippi Council on Obesity Prevention and Management established under Section 41-101-1 or its successor. The State Department of Health shall prepare written materials that describe and explain the criteria for determining whether a person is obese, and shall provide those materials to all food establishments to which this section applies. A food establishment shall be entitled to rely on the criteria for obesity in those written materials when determining whether or not it is allowed to serve food to any person.

Mississipi Lawmakers Propose Banning Fat People From Restaurants (Alas, a blog)

Mississippi legislators seek to bar restaurants from serving fat people (Feministe)

From a customer:

Hi there you all. This is really, really picky and I don't know if anyone would even catch it, but [a minor change]. Sorry but I'm a lawyer -- I'm trained to catch everything. I greatly appreciate all you do for me and gave you a strong vote of confidence to the marketing person who called me today about new [company] products. I told her that next time I go to where you are (what city are you in again?) I am going to bring lots of Hawaiian yummies so you will know what a big fan I am and will be able to associate the [firm mascot] with a real person!

Thanks a lot and take care.

That was sweet.

And, yes, I did reply with the email .sig that has our address in it.

ETA: I forwarded this to my boss, who clipped out the irrelevant change request, and then forwarded it to his boss, and cc'd the department. So, whee, boss of boss says "Terrific feedback!!!!" And shortly before performance review season, even.

My boss just presented this to me. (There's also a cash award that goes with.) You have to appreciate an award that comes on an actual plaque.

I just got this email to one of my personal email addresses (which I emphatically do not give out to customers):

sarudy,

I apologize for contacting you at your personal email address. On the weekend, no less! But I am having a problem with the [product] that you helped me launch. And this can't wait until Monday.

[Two paragraphs explaining problem in detail.]

I've already left voicemail and have sent email correspondence to [the department that actually does handle such issues], but no one has replied. Can you escalate this for me? Someone must be on call during the weekend for emergencies. They can contact me at ...

Thanks in advance for your help.

--[Customer]

I have to assume that the customer did a Google search on my name, found my resume, and used the email contact on that. I'll grant that he would not have recieved a response from the regular channels until Tuesday (we're closed Monday, which I am sure he did not know), and that it was conceivably a revenue-affecting issue, but that really doesn't make contacting me personally any less creepy.

I considered just ignoring it, but the kindness of my heart kicked in. I sent him a quick note apologizing that I have no access to work systems from home... and blind copied my boss's work email. I happen to know that my boss checks his work email on weekends (he has a blackberry/leash) and he also supervises the people who do fix problems like the one in question. Lo!, my boss replied to the customer and said he'd look into it.

I feel conflicted. One the one hand, tracking me down like that distinctly crosses a boundary, and I don't want to encourage that sort of thing. On the other hand, it feels wrong to be able to help someone and just not do it out of orneryness. We'll see how things played out when I go into work on Tuesday...

Sending me an email to tell me "There is an error with [customer]'s website"[1] is about as useful to me as an email subject line consisting solely of "RE: website"[2].

I don't expect an essay long explanation with every contingency covered, but maybe we could start with any information at all?

[1] Note that, historically, approximately 33% of things you consider to be "errors" are either the way things are supposed to be (but you didn't understand what you were selling) or are exactly what you asked for.

[2] Note that every. single. thing. that I do here involves a website in one way or another. Thanks ever so much for narrowing it down.

Two important facts here. One, we work normal business hours M-F, just like most other businesses. Two, we have a two business day turnaround time for requests. (Not that I take that long if I can at all help it, but that's the official timeframe.)

Customer sends us a couple of emails on Friday, maybe 3ish. Then, on Saturday, about 1 in the afternoon, we get

"[thing] that was sent late on Thursday does not seem to be complete. Please advise. In addition, I sent you two Emails on Friday. I did not receive any response."

The Thursday thing, by the way, was something that belongs to another department, and takes slightly longer to process. The customer was told this. You know how I know? Because I heard my fellow rep tell him. More than once.

::headdesk:: I get that he's just eager. But, just... Dude, relax! It's the grown up version of "Are We There Yet?" and it does not endear.

So say upper management:

From: Corporate
Sent: Thursday, December 20, 2007 12:00 PM
Subject: Early close for the holiday on Friday, December 21

Dear Colleagues:

To allow everyone an early start to the long holiday weekend, [Company] offices in the U.S. will close at 2 p.m. in local time zones on Friday, December 21. As in the past, some managers may need to delay the departure of some employees, depending on work requirements.

We appreciate everyone's hard work and commitment to [Company], and wish you all a safe and enjoyable holiday with friends and family!

Regards,
[Upper Management]

In other news, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street opens tomorrow, for which aiskon was somewhat psyched. We may well step out to see it before she heads off to the whirlwind of holiday travel she has in mind. (Me, I'm going home at 2 tomorrow and hibernating until next year.)

So, co-worker K, who's been out a lot lately with something painful but undiagnosed, came in today and said he'll be out for weeks, likely. K's the only other one on my specialty, which is a bit of a concern, but we'll deal with it.

I had to go to a tedious conference call this afternoon and had this whispered exchange at the end of the table:

Me: I have work to do. Especially as I've lost my backup.

Co-worker: You have backup?

Me: Well, K. He's taking a leave.

Co-worker: Why?

Me: He's been in and out of the hospital the last few weeks. So he's taking some time to deal with it.

Co-worker: Wow, I hope he's ok.

Me. Yeah, he's been in a lot of pain... (pensively) I should steal his chair while he's out.

Chain Factor

It's a little web-based game. Nice and addictive. It's tetris-like, but turn based rather than timed, which makes it easy to leave in the background.

Compact Calendar

This is my favorite calendar for year-at-a-glance on my cubicle wall. I actually modify mine in Excel and print it out anew periodically. Basically, I shade in days when the office is closed in one color, and vacation/floating days in another, and bold the dates for events I won't be missing work for, but may need to schedule around. Then on the side, I count down remaining vacation/floating/sick days. (This is what my current one looks like.)

Oh, hey, see that bottom line, where it says "1 floating, 0 vacation"? That means I still have one floating day I need to pin down...
 

(There's a poll below)

I figure asking for tomorrow is kind of cruel short notice, so I'm starting the poll for the day after tomorrow. Listed are all of the possible dates. I'm already taking Monday the 18th because it's the last full day Dad'll be in NJ. I've also already put in for all off Christmas week and the Monday before New Year's (I am so surprised they didn't just put Dec 31 on the 2008 holiday schedule, but, hey, I have the vacation time to use up anyway.)

Friday the 14th would make a nice long weekend, but it's also the day of our free holiday hot breakfast. Friday the 21st would make for a longer break, but I bet it's going to be a short day anyway. I probably should not take Wednesday the 12th, because we have an after-work dinner thingy that day. Hm.
 

Christmas Gifts

I'll bite the bullet for the adults on my list, but now I need to get gifts for a 3-year old (male), a 3-and-a-half-year-old (female), and a 5-and-a-half year old (male). Both boys are in the same household, and will have their stuff mailed to them. Ideas?

When should I take my last floating day?