In the shade of summer's tree...

Anne Heaton and Rose Polenzani singing "I Know Where Your Scar is"

ljsam@technozoo.org — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 19:36:57 GMT

Lyrics for this song:

Sister off she went
And it hurt your heart
So you buried it
Deep inside your chest
Under the papers on your desk

And I know this
That your love lives where your scar is
And I know why
Even when I’m right next to you I feel lonely sometimes

I try to wake you up
Spitting out insults
But they just bounce off your forehead
I learned not to use kind words
Never use kind words
They just scare you away

And I know this
That your love lives where your scar is
And I know why
Even when I’m right next to you I feel lonely sometimes

Sometimes the most important thing
Between two people goes unsaid
And for us it was that happiness lies ahead
We believed this so completely
In the end it would defeat me
For all I ever wanted was your love

And I know this
That your love lives where your scar is
And I know why
Even when I’m right next to you I feel lonely sometimes

****

I've definitely known relationships like this song alludes to - they aren't easy relationships. But this song is so sweet that I couldn't resist posting it like crazy.

Wander Radio!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:35:29 GMT

My friend Jack Jaffee was interviewed on the Wander Radio podcast - and he mentioned Heart of the Hunter! WOOT!

Heart of the Hunter: Behind the scenes

ljsam@technozoo.org — Thu, 22 May 2008 13:46:46 GMT

You know, I had my first real romantic scene in Heart of the Hunter in Chapter 18. Obviously, the book is not a romance per se but it does include romance in it.

I'm hoping my readership (listenership) isn't going to be disappointed.

So Corinne (a gypsy woman who's a weaver and dancer and is Auryn's intended) comes into Peter's tent and it's pretty obvious she's there to give him the tantaleenza, the private dance of passion. Peter saved her life, and she's feeling somewhat obligated to him, and last chapter or so she had "a question" for Mamza Lain (female tribal elder), so you can probably guess she got permission from her to do this. It's a tribal thing with the Valisti (Gypsies) not to owe anyone anything if you can help it, but especially so with Corinne.

And Auryn did let Peter know that, hey, Valisti women don't equate sex with love, per se.

Peter is from the City States of Yaria. Their religion of the Light is not nearly as permissive as Alobar makes it out to be. In fact, it's downright restrictive. They hold virginity to be a virtue before marriage (although they manage to only apply it to girlfolk, it seems).

But Peter stops things and sends Corrinne on her way. She was furious and ashamed, but he showed her with another kiss that this is purely an act of discipline and will, this rebuff - that he wants her just as desperately as she wants him.

Corrinne's really upset and confused. In her mind, she was not doing anything wrong or bad, just offering to share herself and share pleasure with someone who helped save her life and risked his life to do so. Mamza Lain doesn't approve, obviously because Peter is gaje, but she wasn't going to injure Corrinne's fata by saying no to her request for permission. She's also at one go hideously aroused and pissed off at Peter; and this somehow seems to both simultaneously set off her desire for Auryn and her anger at him for being a wanderer. She knows Auryn will be leaving with the mercenary troop when they part ways, and that makes her sad, too. What can be said? She's a bundle of emotions and power. But whereas a gaje woman might get weepy, a Valisti woman wears her emotional chaos like a veil.

Peter's reacting from a few different positions. One, his cultural prudery as a Yarian man that still exists, despite a few initiatory trips to houses on the Street of the Red Lanterns. Two, his relative emotional inexperience and fear as a result of that. Three, he feels some kind of loyalty to Auryn who has already announced her as his intended - and in his mind it would be a disloyal thing to do even though the Gypsies definitely wouldn't think that way. And fourth (and I think most powerful), the fact that he's seen what happens when discipline breaks down in a troop due to sexual fraternization (is soroternization a word?).

Still, the scene does come off as pretty old-fashioned film-noir kind of "passionate rejection." I could see Humphrey Bogart doing the same thing with Lauren Bacall. But the cultural underpinnings are there in place in the scene.

Should be interesting to compare this one with the other romantic scenes I have in the book, later on.

Big Podcasty Weekend

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 19 May 2008 14:23:50 GMT

Busy and productive Sambear weekend!

Over on the Goblin Broadcast Network, Natalie Metzger, the artist extraordinaire who did the cover of Heart of the Hunter for me, did a wonderful job on the Goblin Broadcast Network logo. The idea of a goblin listening to an MP3 player was mine and she executed it brilliantly. So I had to spend some time getting it up on the site and I managed to find a lovely Creative Commons -attribution photograph on Flickr which provided the new background green rock texture. I like it much, much better than the old snakey snake design.

Then I got to game with technomom on our traditional date night, Saturday. It was a difficult game to get through because Seauclaire, her character, is realizing she was duped and betrayed by Volans, the demon of Conflict she captured on an experimental fortress named Starwail in the void of metaspace. I pity the demon - you don't want to screw around with the woman who is a demon queen in her own right and controls the Duke of Satisfaction and the Count of Vengeance. Meanwhile her character's first grandbaby was born - little baby Desmond was hatched and is doing fine - although he's a little Lightchanneler just like his auntie Ceile is.

I also met Allen Kerensky (not his real name, it's a Second Life name) on Second Life. Allen has created a really cool space for in-world tabletop RPG at his home in Old Town sim. I'll have to do some photojournalism and post about this place in my Fireseeds journal. I am really excited about the possibility of getting to RP with new-to-me gamers in-world.

On Sunday I got down to bidness. I edited Chapter 30 of Fledgling and listened to Chapter 31. Man, Chapter 31 sucked - the recording was off somehow. So I re-recorded it from scratch. Finding silence in my little cottage is difficult at the best of times, so I am very happy I was able to do so for a short while and get this done. Posted Chapters 30 and 31, and then turned and released the Bear's Grove interviews with satyrblade, aka Phil Brucato. Four whole episodes and we go into all kinds of details, including his work on Deliria, old White Wolf days, and what he's doing now. It's fun to me to just listen to Satyr talk about whatever it is he wants to talk about, so I think you'll enjoy the four part interview. You can get those four interview podcasts on The Bear's Grove.

I also got some more editing done on the file to Heart of the Hunter Chapter 18. Man - when am I gonna learn not to put little breaks in my stories? This Chapter has a lot of scenes - a lot of little breaks. Every break is a snippet of music that I have to lay in on Audacity. One day I may go ahead and look at getting Adobe Audition to see if it's easier to lay in snippets with that. I did try Ardour on Linux this weekend, but it just wouldn't recognize my USB mic, even though Audacity on Linux dealt with my USB mic no problem.

So, suffice it to say Chapter 18 is not done yet, but it's getting there. It's going to be perhaps the longest Chapter I've released yet - almost an hour of story content.

Meanwhile writing on HotH proceeds. I have written what may be the second-to-last scene, but I have to go and backfill from there. There are a lot of loose ends to tie up and some which will be left untied. I'm excited about it and hope to get it done Real Soon Now.

That, and writing Silken, my RPG of fantasy romance and intrigue, is taking up my writing cycles.

Now on to work!

CA Sizemore

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 12 May 2008 17:33:59 GMT

Hi there!

I'm home from work sick today, but even with a head full of snot, I feel the need to post this.

If you know CA Sizemore and like him, I invite you to send in a donation for him. He came home to find that his wife has died today and the Podcaster Tribe is banding together to try and give him some support.

CA is budding writer and podcast listener living in Phoenix, AZ. I feel terrible for him. This is the sort of thing that could happen to any of us, but especially those of us who have partners who aren't in the best of health.

The money is going to be spent on giftcards for CA and a memorial flower arrangement.

The link below is provided for those wishing to contribute.

Dog-a-log!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Wed, 07 May 2008 16:53:12 GMT

OK, so last night when I was going out to get the Katarina from the train, there was this dog outside.

It was a very friendly dog, tail wagging, ribs showing, we hadn't seen her around here before.

Poor puppy! We called Animal Control to see if they can come out and figure out who her owners are.

She was gone this morning but she did manage to drag a dessicated opossum corpse to our front lawn. A love offering? A threat? A taunt? Who knows.

Now, tonight, I gotta deal with the Mr. Possum Corpse.

Lovely.

I wonder if I have a shovel.

Happy Birthday fossilapostle!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Tue, 06 May 2008 11:13:34 GMT

I know all of you are probably taking the day off on this day, this auspicious day. fossilapostle's birthday, of course! How could I have forgotten? I am going to have to fight the traffic through the parades and other happenings (the giant paper-mache d20 is probably going to block the streets around the Square again), when I should be at home on this day!

Today's the day you can all make a donation to Bequest or perhaps review other parts of his fantastic gaming advocacy site - including the RL D&D Spells (OMGZ!!) or the Young Person's Adventure League.

And maybe later unwind while listening to episodes of The Escapistcast which is his podcast on Gaming Advocacy and to The Square One Podcast, which is the one I do with him about new roleplayers!

Well, I hope all the rest of you enjoy your day and especially to the honoree, fossilapostle! May there be many happy returns Mr. Walton!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Thu, 01 May 2008 11:25:48 GMT

Happy First of NSFW May!

Happy Birthday hopeevey!!!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 19:45:53 GMT

Happy birthday Hope! Many happy returns upon the day!

Love,

Sam

Happy Birthday, judd_sonofbert!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 23:38:56 GMT

Judd, happy birthday, many happy returns, and I hope you have a rockin time this weekend!

Amazing weekend!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 14:31:28 GMT

I had a great time this weekend. hopeevey came to visit. Each night, we had some kind of roleplaying fun. Friday night was an experiment into Prime Time Adventures, which went OK but was kind of flailing around for a bit. And she made up a Burning Wheel Character, which by itself is a pretty intense thing to do. Then Saturday we played our Cora-Ni freeform game, which resulted in a story that was VERY much like a French farce. I really loved it.

Then last night we picked up the thread of that game but didn't get too much farther, but, I hope, we can pick up the game again another time.

Saturday, we got to walk around downtown Decatur, which was lovely. Then Sunday was Stone Mountain (or, as my daughter used to say, "Stone Mount-nin") where we did some letterboxing. I heartily recommend letterboxing as a means of both getting exercise and keeping one's mind engaged.

Hope's visit was awesome. I already miss her. She is wonderful.

Synchronicity

ljsam@technozoo.org — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 15:34:46 GMT

Julia Bond Ellingboe - I got to meet her!!!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 13:53:04 GMT

Sam Chupp and Julia Bond Ellingboe
Originally uploaded by SambearPoet.

Last night at Spelman College, I got to attend Julia Bond Ellingboe's talk about the game "Steal Away Jordan." It was really cool watching Julia introduce people to a whole new world of games they never had heard of.

What was even more impressive was the demo of her game. A lot didn't "click" about the game until I got the demo, and now I really get what this game is about and how much fun it could be.

Thanks, Julia, for a lovely evening!

EDIT: if you want to listen to her talk, it is available as a MP3 download by going to this site: http://bearsgrove.com/actual-play-recordings/

Wow! Burning Wheel! Woof!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 04:49:42 GMT

Burning Wheel. Cool game. I'm reading it. I'm trying to wrap my widdle bear brain around it. It's interesting. I would like to take some of the doods who hang out at the D&D Meet-Up and get them to play, just so I could work it out, give me some experiential learning time.

I thought that I was going to have a full, complete game by spending $26 for the main book and the character burner book. But turns out, I gotta buy the Monster Burner book too. And then there's Burning Empires. And the Asian game. Wow! Well, I do want to support the industry. But dayam!

I figure I'll just wing it if I need the Monster Burner and I get some gamers demanding to play...

I gotta say, though, the $26.00 was well spent on the first two books: they're good quality, with a great index and not-bad binding.

I guess I just didn't know I needed to buy MB too. Makes me wish they had a "All three books slipcover edition."

Anyway, off to do some more reading!

Actual Play: MomoCon SOTC

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 04:11:52 GMT

Once again, I ran SOTC at con. It was a lot of fun, both times. But, I gotta say, it is SO LONG to make characters. I'm just going to start putting together pre-made characters, at least with maybe like the first two sets of aspects done. Phase One and Phase Two pre-made. Skills already chosen? I dunno.

Once again, I notice that the game really plays extremely fast and friendly and people playing really, really enjoy it. I am almost certain that if I had copies to sell, I could've sold 'em all.

Thanks, Evil Hat!

This being an Anime con, there were two Ninjas, a Shinto Priest, and a Samurai. I also noticed that I had gamers of color at my table more often than I have had at other conventions. That was a welcome change! It is not easy to shoehorn some things into SOTC, but I just shrugged my shoulders and let 'em try.

Most original character has to go to a guy who was Billy the Kid's illegitimate son who had been taken in by Dr. Gatling as a ward, and trained in gunsmithery. Whose nemesis was the soul of Jesse James in the body of a Chicago mobster. Now THAT was cool.

Also, let's see, a person named "Lady Apollo" who's primary power was that she was FRICKIN' RICH!

And a fellow who had stumbled into a mad scientist mind-taping experiment and was kind of a jack of all trades due to the fact that he had "absorbed" the knowledge and personalities of all the people who had been taped.

All in all, a fun time. But I gotta solve the chargen problem.

Mortal Coil: Actual Play "Survival, Inc."

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 04:01:41 GMT

OK, so I finally got to play Mortal Coil.

I know that I screwed up the game according to the rules. I got to the character generation part of things, and I am farely certain that I did character generation right. But play....I screwed play up something fierce, I'm fairly certain.

I really need to play with people who are willing to wait while I work through things, but that's boring.

Anyway, I had a lot of fiddly bits to play with - Action pools, Power Pools, Magic Pools, Passion Pools, and so I just kinda winged it.

So I had a group of absolute newbie gamers. And they were OK with playing Mortal Coil, but they didn't know Gaiman. They didn't know Neverwhere. They didn't know American Gods. They didn't know Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I'm screwed.

So I say, OK, what turns you on? What do you like?

Reality TV.

OK. How about we do something where you RP yourselves, only you're in a reality TV show and you have some magical powers?

OK.

So we do the theme document.

Setting: Survivor Island
Tone: Modern Japanese Horror with some weird Reality TV tropes in it. Think "Most Dangerous Game" + "The Ring"

Magical rules:

Jumping: some people can jump really far. Like, superhumanly far. Like, almost flying. And they can land without damaging themselves.
Cost: you're tired after doing it

Additional rule for Jumping: you can carry two people with you, but then you pass out for an hour after landing.

Mind Control: some people can control minds. Cost is: they can use Will to resist, and it costs you 1 Magic point to try it.

Climbing: Some people can climb up sheer surfaces by turning their fingers, briefly, into piton-like finger-shaped force-beams. The cost for this is free, unless you have unusually intense surfaces, which case it costs 1 magic point.

Water Bender: Some people can control water that is present in the environment. Cost: 1 magic point, plus in certain situations a Will conflict.

Demons: There are demons who possess people. Cost: you can resist demons if they try to take you over, and they can't manifest full-body.

Demon Portals: There are portals that allow demons to come through. Cost: but pure natural water will destroy them.

Demon Senses: Some people can sense demonic power. Cost: It is,however, indistinct, so you'd best do a Grace conflict to find the demon.

Rosetta Stone: Some people can have instantaneous knowledge of written language. Limit: but it cannot translate spoken language.

What was really neat is looking at the player's character sheets and seeing the flags.

One person had Passion of Love: food

Two people had a Cooking Faculty

So guess what? One of the big Challenges in the "reality TV" part of the game was an IRON CHEF competition!

"You must satisfy The Dragon, by cooking him a FEAST!" The Dragon was this big, hulking warrior.

That's a first for me. The players loved it, though!

I was surprised at how quickly they totally abandoned any semblence of morality. They just started killing people who had been possessed!

I guess that was the Japanese Horror Movie part of it.

In the end, the pure maiden destroyed the portal to hell with rain, they were all whisked away by the producer of the TV show, and forced to sign Non Disclosure Agreements before they could get their prize winnings.

I really should have put some Morality Magic rules in there, but it is only just now occuring to me.

Anyway, i had a great time and I hope to do it better next time.

Because I got to play Mortal Coil, I count MomoCon a success in the Sambear department.

MomoCon

ljsam@technozoo.org — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 15:46:01 GMT

This weekend is MomoCon, at the Georgia Tech Student Center.

Momocon should get ya there.

It's fwee. (Free)

You can go, and you don't have to pay.

Free.

And I will be there as a guest.

(Which just means I have a magical pass that gets me into the green room)

(Did I mention the convention is Free?)

And I will be running story games there.

I won't charge for that either.

Story games like: Dogs in the Vineyard, Mortal Coil, Cat, The Roach, Prime Time Adventures, Spirit of the Centureeeee (reee reee reee)!

I also have a panel about writing for RPGs.

Come and see me. Game with me. Otherwise, I will be lonely.

You should find it easy to find me. Because I will be the one, in the RPG gaming area, running games.

Playing in a few, maybe even.

Seriously, if you want to make plans, then post a commenty thing here and I will correspond with you.

Oh man, this could become a habit.

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 02:29:56 GMT

Bitstrip strip!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 01:51:28 GMT

How about a little orchestral band music this morning?

ljsam@technozoo.org — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 14:34:41 GMT

two poems about bananas

ljsam@technozoo.org — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 12:36:44 GMT

when we picked the first fairchild free trade banana

my mother showed me pictures once
how these curved boats used to
hold up baby's fists of ice cream
served cherries on top of floating clouds

not believing her, i could not be
excited about these strangely curved
creations grown not from shoots
(because that is how they went away)

but from free seeds given freely;
what we could plant, we did
and the grown-ups were excited
always smiling and looking at me

and maybe they were sad
at seeing not one yellow one
come from the stalk
but i found each one a riot

a bunch with tough skin
you could throw into a boat
purple, blue, orange, evergreen
(the sweetest were pink)

sad because before,
I hear,
they only had yellow ones

***

no cavandish

you cannot be serious
calling our love a cavandish

no, I will be your
gros michel; tough,
tender, sweet,
and nearly extinct

***
for more information about bananas, check out this podcast: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=19097412

"Saving Throw", a D&D Rap song. I kid you not.

ljsam@technozoo.org — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 02:24:57 GMT

Word.

I'm coining a new word....

ljsam@technozoo.org — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 12:34:07 GMT

It's called "podgasm."

A podgasm is where you are listening to a podcast and suddenly, without warning, someone mentions you or speaks back to your concern directly. It usually only happens to podcasters, although it could happen to listeners who are frequent contributors to podcasts.

For example,

I had a podgasm twice yesterday. Once was listening to The Plitone Revisionist, Episodes 5 and hearing Paul address my request to be called "a Revisionist" instead of "A Plitonite." I suspect that as his fame increases, there may be those who better identify with Plitonites, but I am myself more in the Revisionist camp. This could point to a deep schism in his fandom!

But Podgasm! When I heard him mention me.

Another podgasm yesterday was in listening to http://www.12vtheater.com/2008/02/09/down-the-road-part-5-severance-concluded/ 12 Volt Theatre. But don't start there. Start with his first podcast and listen up to there. At any rate, Jack Jaffee mentioned me and that made me smile for a full 10 minutes.

Jack's story is very effective, written with a great deal of lovely texture. It is impressionistic rather than realistic; his narrative structure allows him to cut his word count to the bone. He can take us to another scene, another vista with a one or two-word intro, so that it almost seems like poetry. His influences seem to be Harlan Ellison, Peter Straub, Laurell K. Hamilton, and Neil Gaiman. He is fearless about creating a world not rooted in any one time, but definitively American. He is clearly tapping into a wealth of life experiences from his time on the road as a trucker. His wife, Theresa's voice is silky and provocative, calling you to pay attention and wrapping you up in her spell; sweetness and light with a cold knife waiting.

So, yeah. Good stuff.

Podgasms are very egotistical I suppose, the equivelent of ego-surfing in a search engine, but the best podgasms are ones that happen without warning or expectation.

Makes me want to give unto others, as well.

This is similar to Wikigasm, which is that lovely, wriggly feeling you get when you create a link on a wiki page that has already been created, only you didn't know it yet been created. Kind of esoteric, but quite lovely fun.

The Sixty One

ljsam@technozoo.org — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 12:32:36 GMT

http://thesixtyone.com rocks my socks.

Here's why: I can hear lots and lots of new acoustic music, and I get to put a modicum of influence behind my opinion to push music I really like up the ladder to be found by other people.

Enjoy, please, and add me as a friend or something. I'm Sambearpoet there.

thesixtyone.com/sambearpoet

Happy Zeroth Birthday, Poesy!

ljsam@technozoo.org — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:43:50 GMT

Poesy Emmeline Fibonacci Nautilus Taylor Doctorow is here!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/doctorow/2239156982/

Congrats to one of my favorite authors.