I've got a house that won't repair itself...

Facebook no longer requires you to have your sex listed on your profile, even if you fill it in to give you pronouns.

That is so much for the win that I don't even know how to express it.

The weather should not be allowed to get this hot. The rats have my fan, 'cause I feel like it's my fault they're stuck in a cage... but the upshot is that Gabe has no fan and is sweaty and utterly gross. And whiney. Whine.

I really don't like exam-time.

http://lh5.ggpht.com/abramsv/SBqZqido3WI/AAAAAAAAP_w/hoU2E2PwhB0/s1600-h/schipol_fly.jpg

I thank StumbleUpon.

Across the square, I see a pigeon,
soot-coloured bird, hobbling with purpose,
concentrically, attentively,
on the geometric paving-tiles. A little girl,
her arms flapping, cries
in her own language: the pigeon
approaches her white-sneakered feet,
and it is going to bite her.
She clings to her mother's arm
while her brother brandishes a yellow
pay-phone handset at the marauder.
Around the pigeon goes again, carousel-like,
its head bobbing in time to her music.

CALIFORNIA, FUCK YEAH!

Gender Transgression in the Medieval Middle East, for Medieval World History. Cross-dressers, gay dudes, and sodomitic lions, oh my!

http://www.anyopendoor.com/mwh_islam_paper.pdf

If you do read it, and note any glaring errors, please let me know so that I can fix them before handing it in on Thursday.

I'm so glad that APs are over with. I still have to finish my history paper, but I've got all the footnotes in, so I just need to write the last couple of paragraphs. I may post it here when I finish, since I think some of you (especially the queer ones) may find it interesting. It is long, though.

The rats have calmed down a lot since I got them, to the point where they actually calm *me* down. That means I'm spending more time with them lately. They don't seem to mind crawling around in my lap while I do my homework, and the cats pretty much ignore them. I need to figure out how to rig them a hammock that they won't chew up within days, heh.

Summer is fast approaching! Most of my classes have only about seven meetings left. I guess that's sad, since I do end up missing school over the summer (not that I'll have time this year, with being so busy). Course choices for next year need to get solidified, and I think I'm going with calc, chem 2, English 11, US, bible lit, and art history. Bible sounds amazing, 'cause it's Mr. Davis. Calc... well, apparently I got a "hyphenated recommendation" for my math placement, but I do want to be in regular calc. I may regret that later, but I know I can do better than I did this year in algebra. Hrh. Everything else is pretty standard, except that I'm putting off physics so I don't get stuck with the new teacher (whom I hear isn't terribly good). I need to get on turning in that form.

Did I have a good time at BAGLY prom? I'm not sure. It was loud and crowded, which is not my favourite situation, heaven knows... but I people-watched, and hung out with some neat Andover kids, and... I'm glad I went. Commonwealth prom sounded great, though. Next year it'll happen. Gabe in a tux? That will be something new.

The GLSEN conference was awesome. Gunner Scott was the keynote speaker - he's the head of the MTPC and has done so much amazing stuff. I can't believe I barely knew anything about him before today. I found his talk very uplifting, and for the first time in awhile I felt really secure in my Trans identity. I think it says something that when I'm in an environment that supports me, I'm absolutely sure that transition is the right decision.

We went to Mr. Paul and Ms. Jackman's house afterwards. They're both such sweet people, so that was a lot of fun. Besides, Coal was there! You know, considering what Mr. Paul feeds him, I'm not surprised the dog is so huge. (Half a Nutty Butty!)

I do wish I hadn't gone to the second workshop I did, which was something to do with sexual-orientation-isn't-binary (and it's not like I didn't know that). We had to fill out a form involving the Kinsey scale, which apparently is based on sex, not gender. Well, I don't ID as female (it's just too wrong) but I feel like a liar IDing as totally male either, and otherwise it kinda fails. So I called the workshop leader over and was like, "Uh, I don't even know where to begin."
She was all, "Non-binary gender? Fill it out with sex."
And I was all fuygihoj;kp'l/ no please don't assume things, but I couldn't say so because she just walked away. So that was not such a good experience.

Other than that, though, the conference was great, and it spurred additional plots in my mind for taking on Commonwealth with radical love. I hope I contributed at least something meaningful to each of the discussions; I always feel like I talk too much because I am inarticulate, so I end up rambling in trying to make my point. I was pleasantly surprised that the workshops this year paid more attention to Trans* issues, and there was a race workshop that some people found lacking but that I thought was well done, considering the audience.

Aaand some girl hit on me. I did tell her about Eric, but it made me feel good about myself -- it's good to know that there are people out there who find me interesting (and attractive?) enough for that. It gives me a bit more hope for the future than my mom's view, which is essentially "no one will want you if you transition, so don't."  Rrrgh, family stress.

Also, can I have the Good Asian Drivers for my birthday? They're super cute.

...got this from sircharlie 

You are about to have your own bands CD cover. Follow these directions to the letter.

Go to...

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first article title on the page is the name of your band.

2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.

3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4. Use your graphics program of choice to throw them together, and post the result as a comment in this post. Also, pass it along in your own journal because its more amusing that way.


I took Photoshop license on the image because the original was so damn boring. Richard Richardson is definitely a goth band.


You thought I was actually going to work on my project this week?

God saved me from my history exam!

In actual news, I'm seriously considering getting religion. Don't worry, it's UU.

In a nutshell: Mr. Wharton has no soul and my mom thinks I don't know what I'm talking about. My teachers can't call me Gabe, so I'm 'you there in the corner.' I'm fucked.

Worst. day. ever.

I got a watch for Christmas. It's pretty... Skagen... and one more mens' item to cross off the list. I also got an iPod nano, and as soon as I get an armband or something for it, I'll be able to run with music. Speaking of which, I did a nice running/lifting workout here at my grandparents' house today, and it felt great. I need to do that more often. My poor biceps feel weird though... I was doing curls with 10lbs, and I only use 3lbs at home (more reps, obviously).

Back to school on Wednesday... so I'd better get on that homework... silly Gabe left a bunch of textbooks at school... I'll have to get up crazy early on Wednesday to get there in time to get the remaining work done. At least I got some Balance bars and those little Starbucks bottles to help me out in the mornings. Mmm, caffeine. I think I'm too young to be dependent on it, but what can a boy do?

Also, for anyone who's vaguely following Project Download, someone anonymously donated over $9000 to her via the Internet, and she's going to be able to get her surgery. It really restores my faith in humanity that someone would do that for someone they probably don't even know and who could potentially have been faking. Cheers to them for being so selfless, and a big hurrah for Erin, whose life finally seems to be going in the right direction!

I'll write you all a catch-up entry to the tune of Switchfoot's Meant To Live (I know, I know... but it's one of those sounds that brings back extra-strength memories of being thirteen years old, and sometimes that's nice).

* I turned 16... awhile ago now. I guess that means I can get my permit and/or consent to sex. All I want right now, though, is to turn 18 so I can get my tattoos (my bicep mermaid...) and my lip piercing (shh) and my friggin' hormones. It's one of those times when I just want hormones SO BADLY. They're like unattainable sex, except more important. Okay, I'll stop now.

* I like this Hollister brown polo shirt a lot. Does that make me a sellout? It shows off my chest -- which actually *helps* me, since it binds down to look like good chunky but definitely masculine pecs (at least, in my haughty opinion).

* The parents are still in the same place they were in when I last posted. We haven't talked about it in awhile. I'm not sure what that means, and I'm not sure I like it... but what can you do, anyway. They still don't realize this is for real -- and with each passing day I become more and more sure about just how for real it all is --which is scary, but it gives me somewhere to go.

* Working on arrangements for CTY, which are described in more detail in the following post at cty_therapy: http://community.livejournal.com/cty_therapy/456383.html

* Ms. Dale, Ms. Jackman both know. I finally joined Eric and Ms. Jackman in one of their discussions on the last day before break, and that was good good. Ms. Dale is trying really hard with the name and has offered to be there to talk, which is cool.

* Elif also knows, and though she's having trouble name-wise she sent me a really nice email being all supportive-like and adviceful and complimentary about my finish at U20 JO quals (which was 9th -- just barely didn't qualify or earn my E). Ichi was also acting all proud of me, which makes me happy. Fencing is so big for me at the moment, and I really really want to fence varsity in college -- enough that I might consider waiting on T if I had to... but meh to that.

* Still trying to pull together Christmas presents. I got my parents a book called "How To Raise A Gentleman," which is a bit silly and pretentious and geared towards parents of younger children. I guess it's sort of a gag gift, but since they're not totally accepting me yet, I'm not sure if it's such a good idea. For the grandparents I am making decoupaged coasters; I got my brother a tapas cookbook, which I think he will really like.

* I forgot to ask for a suit for Christmas... damn...

I'm so bad about consistency when it comes to eljaying. I'll try to do better, if only because I like to have something to go back and read a year later. Happy holidays, all -- I'll be in VT for the next week, but I send sparkly Christmas wishes everyone's way (and don't bother me on that one. I'm not a Christian either.)

Hello, I'm Gabriel Grew Murchison, nice to meet you.

The parents know and are in that weird phase of not-really-accepting/being worried/not understanding. I think they'll get over it. They are meeting with my therapist tomorrow. I think they are okay with the name, which means I have the go-ahead to start asking people to use it. Cool.

Bad: someone at the Samaritans said, "I love your name! I'm going to keep it in mind for one of my daughters-to-be." Damn. Time for a new name.

Good: I got sirred today in the mens' department of H&M while not binding and while wearing womens' skinny jeans. Also was mistaken for my brother last night by someone who hadn't seen either of us in years. My voice really kills my ability to pass, and yet I'm constantly mistaken for my 13-year-old brother on the phone. How does that work?

Evan, Gabriel, Shawn, Scott, Matt, Derek,  Caden, Chase, Carter, Cameron, Cecil, Cyril, Cyrus, Cody, Colby, Connor, Corey.