Current mood:	ecstatic
Current music:	The Starting Line - "Saddest Girl Story"
Entry tags:	awkward, essay_esque, food, interesting, jazz_band, laptop, lmc, music, quandaries, realizations, sick, weight, weird, worried

Realizations And Appreciations Of Life (EE)
I am feeling a little better. It's a lot easier to swallow, I can walk around the house without my head feeling like a bowling ball, and I'm not as miserable as I formerly stated. I hope to fully recover from this sickness in the next couple of days.

Being sick gives you a new approach to life: it makes you appreciate everything in its entirety. It makes me thankful that there's people who care about me, and who are wishing me to get better. The things we take for granted you realize are so precious and delicate. When I actually have an appetite during this state of being sick, it's so good to treat my tastebuds to sensations like that. Subtle realizations in the course of a day can be so oddly overwhelming; things can happen in such an involuntary manner that you don't even realize it's you who was doing that.

I sat down at the piano this afternoon after not playing it since Thursday night and I hardly recognized it (to put it in an exaggerated form). Speaking of that word, how incredibly strange it is! Think about it: Ehx-adge-urr-ai-tihd; Ek-zah-jurr-ated. It's so weird. And it's strange that I just noticed something as random as that. Back to the piano, though: I put on my headphones and heard the somewhat familiar sound and just felt so relaxed. I'm glad I haven't lost my ability to play.

As I started writing this entry, I put on my noise-canceling headphones and listened to some music from my "Most Popular" section. I don't know if it's the fact that I haven't listened to music in a couple of days, or that I am noticing every little thing, but the sound was amazing. It sounded different, to say the least. I was hearing it from different levels of the mindset. It's truly astounding how some of these music artists can be so talented. I feel so blessed that I have the opportunity to listen to this music on an mp3 player that has bought me so much joy.

Another thing that really struck me as odd was when I opened the lid of my laptop for the first time since Thursday night: everything looked so foreign; the start menu, IE's layout, the typeface of certain fonts. It's all so nice and neat, orderly and precise. I'm incredibly appreciative that I have a laptop like this to use at my leisure. I didn't update at all yesterday because the ninth of December was a day that didn't even occur to me as reality. I was up since five o'clock in the morning in a state of confusion, trying to understand what I am to do about all of this. I watched TV for the majority of the day, and only went up to my room once, and that was to fall asleep.

Apart from all these cheery realizations, I have hesitated on addressing the solemn news: my weight has dropped. I was 145 lbs on Thursday, but now I am only 141 lbs. It's mainly because I ate hardly anything on Thursday and Friday--probably no more than five-hundred calories each day. Today, though, I'm trying to make up for it, as I'm feeling really hungry. The other things that really bugged me are that I missed two of the most anticipated events of this holiday season: the Liberty's Christmas Choral concert last night, and the annual LMC Jazz Festival this morning. It was probably the worst time to get sick, but it was my turn. I can't wait to get better and continue living my life to the fullest.

~Chris