This'll blow your mind!:

Mood:  aggrivated

If Mr. Obama does not get elected as our next president, it's over. I'm packin' my crap up and movin' to Canada. Because living in this country with another Bush Republican is not going to cut it for me. Any country would be better than ours.

So the debate was insanely entertaining. I liked how Palin kept talking and talking and talking but there wasn't really anything informative or important coming out of her mouth.

In my humble opinion, the top 5 moments that stood out to me:

1. When asked to explain McCain's plan on solar energy, she completely ignored the question and said "let me just get back to the tax increases Joe is talking about...." and changed the subject. And when it was Biden's turn, he started out with saying "I didn't hear any explanation of any plan..."

2. When Palin described how her VP canadicy would closely resemble the "strength and wisdom" of Dick Cheney's, Biden shot back saying "With all due respect, Mrs. Palin, but Dick Cheney has been one of the worst vice presidents in the history of this country..." AMEN BROTHUH!!! A-TOTHEFRICKIN-MEN!

3. When asked about education, Palin made a little slip up. "God bless your sister's heart for being a teacher. She'll get her rewards in Heaven..."!! So they shouldn't get rewarded now??? Is that what she's saying!?! Then she goes on to say that teachers deserve good pay and blah blah blah. Wow. Nice save there governor!

(By the way, Palin was the governor of the least populated state in the United States. Biden has been a US senator for more than 3 decades......yeah.....)

4. She kept saying how McCain is the "maverick" of the Republican party, the crazy guy who goes by his own ideas and not that of his party's, and he just keeps bringing new ideas and solutions to the white house constantly. Then Biden almost giggled and said "As much as I love that man, and I do love and respect him, he is in NO WAY a maverick in the issues that actually matter..." He proceeded to list more than 10 different times McCain proved himself to be just like Mr. Bushy. That made me stupid happy.

5. My fav statistic? The number of times they voted in favor of tax increases. Palin said Obama voted in favor of it 27 times. Biden said McCain voted in favor of it 437 times! Hahahahaha that one had us all laughing.

Let's not forget the moment where, just for like 4 seconds, Biden choked up a little at the mention of his ailing son. Totally made my heart ache for a good 3 minutes as he continued talking.

Gender has nothing to do with this guys. Nothing. She's quite clearly completely incapable of being a very good vice president. I mean, yeah, Cheney was so bad that at this point, any VP would look amazing my comparison. But still. In my opinion, she just made a fool of herself with her stupid comments and snide grin that was always plastered on her face.

What a friggin idiot.


OBAMA '08!

Step One to my All-Nighter:

Update my livejournal.....wow......

So let me break down my upcoming days, shall I?

Oh the wonder that is Thursday!: 
1. Get up @ 7, PRINT out paper that I just finished right now
2. get mum's credit card and don't forget your own!
3. READ two chapters of your book on the lightrail
4. QUIZ in my class on the read book @ 9am
5. RUN to the financial aide office and ask my thousands of questions / make payments
6. RUN to my 12pm class cause my paper is due first thing through the door
7. get home and somehow find time to EAT
8. DRIVE downtown again for Dem Club meeting @ 5pm
9. get back home by 7pm to EAT dinner and shower

Oh the magic that is Friday!:
1. (practice for church @ 9??) ---> alternative: meet mai tai to run arrends
2. PICK UP lucy at around tenish at that place I can't really remember how to get to
3. MEET with Phoebe @ noon
4. MEET with mai tai and sarah for lunch @ 3:30pm
5. somewhere, uh, EAT dinner too
6. DRIVE to mountain view for my dance lesson @7pm (don't forget T-bear!!)

Oh the splendor that is Saturday!:
1. (practice for church @9??) -----> alternative: meet t-bear for our breakfast date!
2.
I
I
I
v
123. work 1-10
124. it would be nice if you SHOWERED once in a while!

Oh the funtasticness that is Sunday!:
1. CONDUCT youth mass @9am
2. EAT breakfast at some point
3. CONDUCT youth mass @ noon
4. PICK UP mai tai @ 2pm
5. DRIVE to Visona Park by 4pm
6. CELEBRATE Gio's b-day!!!!

And I missssssss himmmmmmm! WAHHHHHHHH!

Okay. Back to work.....

I have bruises all over my right arm and body.

Tanesha grabs my arm out of nowhere and says "what the hell happened to you girl?! Is he beatin you or some shit?!" Haha yes, he totally beats me.

The concert was insane. If I thought the rock concert was crazy, oh no. Apparently underground hip hop is where it's at!

I met his best friend I fell in love! He reminds me a lot of Matt because of the way he talks, the depth of his voice, and even his posture and the way he carries himself. Only he's a lot funnier and a lot more random. I can definitly see how he and mai tai influence each other. They're so much alike.

So we all went in mai tai's roomie's car. His girlfriend is really irritating, I gotta say. Her voice is really high pitched and she's the kind of girl who uses phrases like "you guys! chut up!" and "like oh my god it's so scary!" Mai tai and I were a couple of minutes away from punching her in the face. She yells at anthony (his roomie) all the time and even I get really annoyed with her. According to mai tai the only reason anthony puts up with her is "for the sex". Well isn't that nice? He didn't even want to invite her to the concert but he didn't want to go "empty handed". That's stupid.

Anyways so his best friend deals drugs. When we went to go pick him up we went to his room and it's a typical pot head room. The mattress is on the floor, the bed unmade. Different kinds of bongs everywhere and posters of marijuana leaves and naked girls everywhere. Yeah I definitly like that influence on mai tai. I enjoy it....

The sad thing is is that it's impossible to hate the guy. He's the sweetest person the planet, and when he saw me he was like "LESLIE!" and he gave me a giant hug, nearly lifting me off the floor. Even if he was high at the time, it was all good. At least he smelled nice.

In the car he rolled a blunt and smoked it. I could tell mai tai was pissed about it cause he had told me a while ago that he had told him that we didn't smoke. He was being rude. But like a gentleman, before he smoked it, he asked us if we would like a hit.

I was getting pretty pissed by this point. If I wanted to feel like I was in middle school again I would've stayed there.

I really don't care what his friends do with their free time. They can skate or smoke or do whatever they feel like doing. I just don't want it affecting mai tai. Yeah he quit on his own and has been clean for like two years but it still worries the hell out of me. He calls him his gay lover for gods sake. They've been best friends for 6 years. It worries me way too much....

We get there and we all split up. Anthony, his girlfriend (Courtney, by the way) and Roger didn't want to see the opening acts so they went to skate for a little bit. Mai tai and I were there to see the show so we got in and got a spot right in the front. It was perfect!

That's how I got all the bruises. It got really crazy when the main act came up. There were these adorable 16 year old kids on our left who we had been standing next to at the Zion I show like 4 months ago! They had recognized us! That was pretty cool. Later on during the show this drunk girl tried to push towards the front but the 16 year old kid next to me and I agreed not to let her in. He was my homie. ;D

This huge muscley guy pushed into the crowd and got a spot next to me on my right. It got so hectic that mai tai was pushed off and he was forced to stand behind me with his arms around me, hanging on to the railing for dear life. We were being shoved super hard from the people behind us so I was pushed into the railing for a good half of the show. I have a bar-shaped bruise right under my boobs. Then everyone starting pushing towards the center (where we were), so to my left they were pushing towards me and the muscley guy was pushing back. I was getting smooshed like crazy. I couldn't breathe sometimes, it hurt so bad!

So I have bruises on my rib cage from the muscley guy shoving his elbows into me from time to time. The poor 16 year old next to me was pushed away from the railing and was replaced by a really tall guy whose arm was in my face for the rest of the show. Even mai tai had to let go of the railing cause he felt like his wrist was about to snap. I'm telling you it was so chaotic I kinda paniced for a little bit there!

After being pushed and shoved and elbowed for a good 3 hours we were both insanely exhausted. We almost crawled out afterwards, and some guy in front of us threw up in this hand. That was freakin discusting. We met at the car with everyone else and I was introduced to more of mai tai's friends.

It's funny. They all knew exactly who I was. They were all like "it's nice to finally meet you!" ..... ???? He talks about me huh? hahaha

The car didn't start for a good half hour. That was a little scary but we were then on our way. I was so tired it was ridiculous. A friday night concert and a 9 hour work day and then another concert is just too much for me. I fell asleep with my head in his lap.

He woke me up what seemed like 2 minutes later and we're pulling up to his house. He playfully mentioned just staying at his house and let me tell you, I would've given the entire night up just to do that. It sounded soooooo tempting it wasn't even funny. But of course he wouldn't even let me even if I said yes. He raced home to get me in bed by one. Such a sweetheart.

Anyways I woke up this morning with a really sore body and what felt like 5 hours of sleep. I really had like 9, mai tai let me sleep in. But either way. I was still tired.

And here I am, 11:47 on a monday, still chattin away even though my eyes hurt and my head's kinda pounding. Maybe I should take a little sleep huh? Yeah. Good night cruel world. Miss you already =D

Ah geez where to start?!

So as soon as I can, I'm off to mai tai's. Because his roomie is AWESOME he sent me a pic of mai tai sleeping, saying "come here and wake him up!" It would've been so great! But gio had to go to longs and i couldn't say "uhhhh i kinda had plans to sneak into mai tai's bedroom and wake him up with tons of kisses..."

Too bad =(

Anyways, we pretty much had the best time ever. We did nothing. We just laid on his bed talking about everything, just hanging out for like 4 hours. Just like we used to when we had time. It was wonderful. Then I was going to make him lunch when I realized that he had no food. Literally. Completely barren. They starve him!!! (obviously!) so i had no choice but to take him to lunch. =D

Then T-bear picked us up and we were off! She had this CD of mixed songs that were hugely popular when we were in like 5th grade. She had the Spice Girls and lots of Nsync mixed with Brittney Spears and Mandy Moore. Poor mai tai was about to jump out of the window when we started singing along to a backstreet boy's song.

Anyways we get to santa cruz and it's freezing cold already. There's also a really long line. We hop in line and T-bear had to wait for a couple of her friends that she also invited. She didn't even get through the doors until 8:30 when the show started at 8! Anyways we get in and make ourselves comfy on the floor. I bought myself a Four Year Strong shirt, which was the only reason I was there. It's beautiful, I fell in love with it. I'm wearing it tomorrow ;D

So mai tai's never been to a rock show (except to Rage, which I hate him for!!!) so he had a blast. He didn't know it could get so crazy. Right when Four Year Strong came up we pushed past everyone (litereally. he was leading me through, punching people out of way. i love him. hahaha) and were right in the front. Right when they came on, the whole place went nuts. It was fantastic.

I kinda lost my voice cause i was screaming so much. The moshpit was so massive that everyone was just being pulled in. Mai tai was standing right behind me and the moshpit was right behind him. We kept getting pushed and the wind knocked out of both of us, it was so fun. He kept grunting, it was hilarious. Everyone knew the words and everyone was jumping up and down. At one point my feet weren't even touching the ground anymore and when the crowd started jumping i was forced to jump too! It was crazzzzzy!

We were up front for their whole set. It was almost an hour. By the time they were done we crawled out of the crowd and tried to catch our breath! I was sooooooo glad he came with me cause T-bear wouldn't even touch the front. "It's painful and sweaty!"

Well yeah, you're at a rock concert. =P

The rest of the night was pretty mellow. People were getting stoned and drunk, which wasn't really in our plan so we went outside for a little bit. His back was killing him and my feet were so sore from standing so I sat against the wall and he laid his head in my lap.

I always have this overwhelming need to take care of him.

T-bear ended up getting really pissed because her friends ditched her and she was sick of being pushed all night and tired of the smells and the loud music in her ear and blah blah blah. I guess it wasn't really her night. It's all good though. We all had fun anyways. Afterwards at like 12:30 we walked to a Longs near by and bought snacks for the trip home. Those Ritz crackers with sour cream and onion flavoring taste like sex when it's that early in the morning. Oh my God. They were amazing.

We were sooooo tired by that point. Even though we drove home with music blasting and the windows down, we were still exhausted. We got home, I literally texted a simple "goodnight" before hitting my pillow and falling fast asleep till 9:30.

It was a wonderful night!

And tomorrow night I get to go to a hip hop show with mai tai, his roomie, his girlfriend, and mai tai's best friend, whom I've met and seems really awesome. I'm so excited! We're all going to squeeze in his roomie's car which should be quite the adventure.

XD

Okay I'm crushed.

The heat really makes me into a complete zombie. I just walk through daily life without thinking and without feeling. I know I've been a pretty big jerk for the past week or so but I've just been so damn tired and weak from everything.

The heat usually doesn't effect me so severely but I don't know what happened. I haven't been really happy since.....Sunday. And that was only for like 4 hours.

Everything has been so hectic, you know? Things have gone sort of haywire since school started.

I overdrafted in my account and I knew they would charge me for it, but I didn't think I'd overdraft three times. They charged me $35 each time, so when I got my next paycheck, it balanced out to about $12.

Patti had to cut my hours down cause 1) she needs me at night and has too many people in the morning, 2) we have new kids that need to be trained, 3) the full time people get dibs on the hours and 4) she can't afford me. Because of my cut hours, I'm making like $100 a week. That's ridiculous.

My mom had to pay for my car last month and she had to help me out this month. My car payment is $370 every month due on the 2nd. So when I'm done paying my mom back for the $470 I owe her just for my car, I'll be back in the negatives. I also had to pay for school on the 18th of August (the next payment is due in two weeks) and that was a wopping $485.

So I basically owe my mom like $900.

Not to mention the books I just bought for school too. Since I hardly worked this summer, payment just wasn't possible for any of this stuff. I'm so stressed out. Unfortunately (but thankfully?!) my hours at work have just been picked up again so I'm working every single day except Fridays and Sundays.

I couldn't get a class that I wanted to take because SJSU enlisted the highest amount of incoming freshmen this year in its entire 150 year history. So basically I'm paying for 4 classes (full time) but only taking 3.

So now that school has started, I get up at 7 everyday, go to school, come home, and go to work for 6 hours. I'm getting more money, yeah, but a lot less sleep and a lot less food.

Not to mention a lot less time with the family and mai tai.

I'm lucky that they're all really understanding. I spend time with my baby at school, even though I very rarely see my mom anymore let alone gio or dad. But like mai tai always says, things can only get better once I get used to it.

Speaking of mai tai, he's the reason I'm crushed. I didn't get to see him on Monday, or Tuesday, or Wednesday, or Thursday. I'm used to seeing him at least 4 times a week so I'm going to be selfish and crazy and say that a week away from him is nothing short of torture.

So I told him I was having a pretty rushed and exhausting week and he told me that he was planning to take me on a picnic on Friday!

Thank you sweety.

So here's the plan. Get to his house AS SOON AS POSSIBLE (like, 9 maybe!?!) and cuddle with him in our pjs! ;D then we're going to watch a Frank Sinatra movie because we've been planning on doing that since we met and never had to the chance to! Then he said he's going to take me to a "really beautiful spot" for our picnic, of which he's been "getting ready for" all day. I can just picture him making the sandwiches with his drunk roommate. It's such an adorable thought.....

I was depressed to find out that I had a youth groupie party later that day so our whole day together had to be cut short. "But that's okay", he always says "it makes our time together that much sweeter."

Thank God he's the positive one!

So after a long lonely day of working my ass off because Patti was there and we're apparently really behind in inventory, I get to my car and there's a rose on my windshield.

Seriously? Best boyfriend ever.

I drive home, my head pounding and my feet aching, ready to kick back and get to bed early for a new start tomorrow. When mom asks me rather earnestly to help her out at work tomorrow.

I honestly felt like someone grabbed my heart and pulled it out of my throat. I was ready to break down in tears right then and there. Would she understand? No, of course not. No one would. Because to everyone else, I always overreact.

It was so unfair. This one thing I've been counting on all week was suddenly pulled from under me. Of course I'm going to help her clean five gigantic houses on my day off. Because I love her to death and she comes first.

But goddamn it.

I told him in tears. I can't always hide how I feel, no matter how hard I try. He understands it. As always he told me that everything was going to be okay and that he completely understands my decision and that, although he's sad, he knows we'll be together soon.

Thank God he's the strong one.

After an early "goodnight sweetheart", he texts me back at like 11:30 telling me that he has a funeral to go to at noon tomorrow anyways. I won't let him miss that. So instead of spending the morning with him and his adorable nephew that constantly kisses me on the cheek everytime we're in the same room, I get to help my mom clean. Instead of fighting over which movie to watch first and what side of the bed we're going to lay on as we watch it, I get to help my mom clean. Instead of laying in the grass, staring up into the trees while he talks to me about his passion for music, just like we used to when we were friends, I get to help my mom clean.

Therefore I am crushed.

I really am a drama queen. But at least someone has the patience to listen to me. At least someone understands me and doesn't judge me.
 

I miss him so much.