| dear god..this hasnt been u[dated in awhile!! |
[17 May 2005|11:16am] |
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mood |
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 why am i here again? i forget. |
] |
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music |
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arcade fire:power out |
] |
jsut to let you knwo im still alive..
not well, but alive at the least
all thsi talk of my borthers suicidal wishes and man6y more things are gettign me to the point i might follow him on that, i mena, thers nothign here for me now, all my friends live far away..it sucks, a[part from matt and phil, i dont have any friends..jsut ppl i know it seems..
jesus i gotta lighten up or sth but opimisum seems to yhave decided to take a vacation on me, pah
fuckgin shitty world
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| wonder if thsi works |
[05 May 2005|03:35pm] |
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mood |
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 cos i fuckgin rock |
] |
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music |
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mlp |
] |
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| ok |
[27 Apr 2005|02:49pm] |
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mood |
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 weeeeee |
] |
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music |
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teenage kicccccccccks |
] |
lots of stuff happenbd, not drank anytyhing for a while, shrink next week, feelign wired up today mwhahahaha
even though ive had fuck all by the way of sleep
but things are good, i ffeeel ok, jsut a lil lonely now laetis back in france
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| uh oh |
[31 Mar 2005|12:29pm] |
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mood |
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 wooooooooo dude!! |
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music |
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black market blood |
] |
hmm..shouldnt have taken up booze as a hobby..im gonna regret it later i know it
ah well
you only got one life
im so awake for only gettign four hours friggin sleep O_O its god dam amzing!!!!!!!!
im really peppy!
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| ARGH! |
[17 Mar 2005|10:14pm] |
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mood |
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 GOD DAMMIT!!! |
] |
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music |
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fuck you! |
] |
For fucks sake!!! why is the forum being such a shit all of a sudden?? god dam thing!!*has a head fit*
bugger fuck shittyyingarsewan ktitbuugertwtcuntfuckgitbastardbitch
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH!
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| mah! |
[17 Mar 2005|09:58pm] |
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mood |
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 hmmmmmmmmmmmm |
] |
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music |
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*brick shit house* |
] |
fuckign forums buggered up on me and i have no form of messenger at hand, friggin hell ><
ah well, anyways, got a load of fics to update
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| O_O |
[17 Mar 2005|03:03pm] |
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mood |
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 WAAAAAAAAI!! |
] |
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music |
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the tv..lol |
] |
You know you've ahd too much wkd when you wake up the next morning and your tounges still blue...
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| fuck |
[16 Mar 2005|01:22pm] |
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mood |
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 O_O |
] |
| [ |
music |
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nth |
] |
im gonan die of bloody boredom
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| dam |
[15 Mar 2005|05:11pm] |
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mood |
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dam |
] |
| [ |
music |
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placebo:innocence of sleep |
] |
well, feelign highyl confused, amny feelign coming and going, and fuck
i need someone by my side
not liek a friend or a lover, or a relative or family, jsut someone
well..maybe a lover
but jsut, to make life a little more bearable, some onei can go see and cuddle for a while.
never had that, someone i can jsut call on to come round to be with. my brothbers quite lucky in that aspect, as he has georgia, his fionce
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| oh fuck |
[14 Mar 2005|12:02pm] |
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mood |
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 ARRRRRRRRGH! |
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music |
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FUCKALL |
] |
some one please kill me
i mean, thers so much shit happening to me atm, i cant fuckign sleep its that busy in my mind,
*sigh*
i mean, i need to get a grip really, but im me, meaning i have that little problem that i have a huge prob and never tell about it unless its really fuckign me off, but they all are.
all i seem to do is worry worry worry, and i think i ought to maybe see the doctor in a few days, cos me adn my brother are bother very depressed (which isnt helping, cos when you have your fave lil bro sobbign in ur arms, its kinda heart breakign to say the lest) and he was sayign how bleach will kill you, but i ws informed that if you dilute it, it wont oor sth shit liek that, anywho, that led me on a mission to leave thsi godforsaken place, so, my drinks now have an added ingredient to them, but im not feelgin to good so.
adn some ppl migth say
*oh, you shouldnt do that*
its my god dam jorunal!! i cant write what i want, so pah! and itws the only place where i can type freely
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| hey you |
[09 Mar 2005|02:55pm] |
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mood |
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 mmnmnmn |
] |
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music |
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sth...dunnow aht, but its weird |
] |
well,
over trhe last few hours have been eventfull to sday the least, talkied to loaed of ppl, got even mroe confused about my feelings than before hand,
all thats goign through my mind atm is girls girls girls
and the fuckign theme to the bleeding fimbles
god dam you elliot
i woke up roughly 7ish
and was shattered as you can imagine, i mean, WHen your up till half two, its no fun gettign up the next day, i felt dead, and nearly fell down the fuckinstairs
its alrigfth for adam and hollie, theyre usedto this they go to shool and do what kids do, jsut live life
though, come to think of it, during the day ive been glued to the net, talkign to elenore mostly, and lookign blanky at the forum, wishing it was moe alive, liek in the early days, its kinda dead somtimes, but there you go.
you know, i had breakfast for once,a dn ti didnt seem half as ba as it usually tastes t me, in fact,m i went back for a further 3 slices of toast and ate them all up even if i was shatterd. (though not as shattered as camden :S that nearly killed me that hangover)
so now im sjut waiting for my autn to get back hoem and for someone to come on msn
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| *sigh* |
[08 Mar 2005|07:10pm] |
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mood |
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fuck... |
] |
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music |
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black mage village (ff9 soundtrack) |
] |
in the current swing of things,im crap
but theres some kimnd of happiness in me, some where
but its jsut,
i got down to writing a small fic
about brian and steve
and brian gave up stefan, beacuse he loved steve
but the feeling wasnt the samefor steve
so brian was left with a lover hed hurt in the worst way,emotionally, with un requitted love with someone he saw everyday,
its sad and i was reading it through, and yeah,
pah
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| SHIT!!! |
[04 Mar 2005|12:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 fuck > |
] |
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music |
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muse:hysteria |
] |
things are abotu to get very bad O_O
i jsut gotta cope with it now, which im hoping i will do, im pretty confident things will hti an all time low, but im nto gonna do anythign stupid,
need to pull through this, i ahve big plans..
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[01 Mar 2005|03:41pm] |
jesus,
suiced is so appealing right now, i wonder what they'll fidn of me in the morning
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| then it seemed to dawn on me... |
[28 Feb 2005|01:12pm] |
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mood |
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my hearts melting |
] |
| [ |
music |
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haemoglobin (acoustic) |
] |
well, im in a huge prob, to say the least,
i cna thinnk straight,
i mean,when someone comesinto your life, its amazing when you see them, and they steal your heart away, and then they are forver on your mind
but then theres the other problem, that i remabers about a bioy i dated, when two ppl are in love, but then the toher, realises, that they arent as in love with the other person, even though they want so despratly to be in love with them, sth isnt right about it,
it not that its the situation im in
its jsut the thrtoughts goign through my heead
cos it must be horrible, to be in a realionaship where you cant return the love..
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| fuck.. |
[25 Feb 2005|11:53am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 MEHEHHEEH |
] |
| [ |
music |
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manson: rock is dead |
] |
well, last nigth was eventful to say the least, there was two fuirggin power cuts, so me and phil (my lovely housemate, whos fuckecd off on me for a weekend, so poor paris here is all on her len) were forced to take out al, my candels and lit them, me makign shadow puppetys obn the wall,
a horse
rabbit
rhino
dog kangaroo
bat
the usual, then the power came on for a bit before blinkign out on us, but all was well again after about 25 mins
meh, so me gonna be bored all fuckign weekend, besides that, im on a typing spreee mwhahahahhaa
and bracing myself fro tonight, dying my hair BLACK
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| HOLY FLYING FUCK!!! |
[13 Feb 2005|11:56am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 pleeeeeh! |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
sth in my head :S |
] |
omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im going to london tomorow!!
and my god im am bloody terrified lol
im worried ill forget sth, or miss the bus, or the bus will crash or sth will happen!!! ><
argh!
anwyas, today, got up at 11:30, having had a good 8 hourse sleep :D
meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!!!
and the sucky thing is, the place i need to get laeti's valentines present dosnt seemt ot exist aroudn here, so that sucks arse, beacuse need to get it TODAY
or im fucked ><
damit!
i shall get it somehow, that i am sure of >
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| god dam |
[12 Feb 2005|03:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 wooooooooo |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
fuck all |
] |
well, we start again, am a girl, 16 blady blah blah
i look liek this:
so, anyways, two day to go untill london YAAAAAAAAAAAAYS"
and im estactic cos i get to see my darlign laeti! mwah! love you!
well, thats all for now, cos im busy doign aload of posters and drinkign milkshake (strawberry of course)
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| omfg!! |
[20 Dec 2004|04:55pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm |
] |
| [ |
music |
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on a high (duncan sheik) |
] |
I just did the most amazing thing in the whole fuckign world today with laeti, omg i fuckign love her to death she made me feel liek no one has ever ever done before!
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm LAETI I LOVE YOU!
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paris_valentine's journal
god dam love!
