Jason Schwartzman, of Rushmore and I Heart Huckbees and ... that's about it, has gone all Dogstar on the world and is the drummer for Phantom Planet. And as some of you know, Phantom Planet sings "California," which is the theme song for The O.C.. But hilarity ensues ... have you listened to the drums in that song? A freaking monkey could play them. I take that back ... a freaking turkey could play them, holding the drum sticks in its talons and using its beak for the cymbals. While drunk on SoCo. I take that back ... Ashlee Simpson could play them. A demonstration: On-beat pound ... on-beat pound ... on-beat pound ... on-beat pound. Dude ... Rick Allen kicks your ass every day and twice on Sunday and he's got ONE ARM.

It's really quite hysterical. And pathetic.