Lord of the Flies and Sometimes of the Dance - Eventful Day!

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Eventful Day!

Jan. 6th, 2006 at 8:21 PM

I made it through class. I ate solid food. And I nearly got in a fistfight on the CTA train coming home, but I might also have found true love.

The fever broke this afternoon, and I made it all the way through class today with no barf. I ate chicken soup (so far) with no dire consequences. I treated my inner child to the purchase of Serenity on DVD. And on the way home, this is what happened:

Location: Brown Line, 7:30 pm, North toward Kimball

BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Train conductor: This is Merchandise Mart.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah BLAH! BLAH!
Train conductor: This is Armitage
Train passengers: :sigh, rolling eyes:
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: blah and BLAH! BLAH AND BLAH! blah blah blah blah blah blah!"
Train conductor: This is Fullerton.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: BLABBITY BLAH! BLABBITY! BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLABBITY! BLABBITY!"
Train conductor: This is Belmont
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: Did I mention blah? AND BLAH? BLAB BLAB BLAB BLAB BLAB! FUCKING A BLAB!
Me: I will give you my seat and $5 if you will hang up your phone and stop talking.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: Oh my god, you will never believe it, this TOTAL BITCH just told me to shut up!
Me: I was deadly serious. My seat + $5. Please. Stop talking.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: OH MY GOD, WHAT A CUNT, WHY CAN'T SHE JUST TUNE IT OUT? BLABBITY BLABBITY
Guy Next To Me: 10 bucks.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: What?
Guy Next To Me: I will give you $10 to shut up.
Me: Plus my $5. That's $15.
Guy Next To Me: To shut up.
Me: Plus, our seats.
Guy Next To Me: If only you will be quiet.
Train Conductor: This is Damen.
BLABBY CELL PHONE LADY: OH MY GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE? WHY CAN'T EVERYONE JUST MIND THEIR BUSINESS? WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, BITCH? YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH ME, I WILL PUNCH YOU IN THE GODDAMN FACE."

She got off at Western.

I did not get Guy Next To Me's phone number.

I totally should have.

Music:beautiful, blessed silence

Comments

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shzwah wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:12 am (UTC)

I...absolutely...LOVE Serenity. And the Firefly series it's based on. It warms my heart that you "treated your inner child" with it's purchase. Yay!

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magdalene1 wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:59 am (UTC)

I'm getting over a truly evil flu. And Joss Whedon is my master, now.

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sanj wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:23 am (UTC)

Also, you have the best. scene. ever. for a film set in the city. No one will believe that except for you, Cell Phone Lady, and the Guy Next to You.

Yeesh.

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magdalene1 wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:59 am (UTC)

Hee, when your life is like a movie, you don't have to actually be creative!

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madresal wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 04:08 am (UTC)

ha that is awesome!!

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crankyasanoldma wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 04:24 am (UTC)

This is what Craigslists "Missed Connections" was made for, baby.

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magdalene1 wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 04:26 am (UTC)

Dear Sarcastic Guy:

I think you're my soulmate.

Love,
Bitchy Train Girl

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outsidetheparty - Jan. 7th, 2006 05:16 am (UTC) Expand

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magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 05:37 am (UTC) Expand

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outsidetheparty - Jan. 7th, 2006 06:01 am (UTC) Expand

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empress_pixel - Jan. 7th, 2006 03:56 pm (UTC) Expand

empress_pixel wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 05:36 am (UTC)

So, the lesson here is...

I seriously need to hold out for a cash settlement the next time some rude old lady tells me to shut up when I'm on the phone in public.

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Re: So, the lesson here is... -

magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 05:39 am (UTC) Expand

As long as it's not about the phone. -

empress_pixel - Jan. 7th, 2006 03:51 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:15 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

empress_pixel - Jan. 8th, 2006 01:45 pm (UTC) Expand

You KNOW I'm not a phone talker, so forgive my prejudices. -

magdalene1 - Jan. 8th, 2006 03:43 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: You KNOW I'm not a phone talker, so forgive my prejudices. - (Anonymous) - Jan. 9th, 2006 12:23 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: You KNOW I'm not a phone talker, so forgive my prejudices. -

empress_pixel - Jan. 9th, 2006 12:25 pm (UTC) Expand

replies - (Anonymous) - Jan. 9th, 2006 08:41 pm (UTC) Expand

starcat_jewel - Jan. 10th, 2006 07:21 am (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

mcduff - Jan. 8th, 2006 03:23 am (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

empress_pixel - Jan. 8th, 2006 01:34 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 01:13 am (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. - (Anonymous) - Jan. 9th, 2006 12:02 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

empress_pixel - Jan. 9th, 2006 12:26 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: As long as it's not about the phone. -

mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 03:35 pm (UTC) Expand

off_coloratura wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 07:26 am (UTC)

Oh. My God. You are a god and my hero. And the queen of the world. I love you.

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rollick wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 08:34 am (UTC)

Schweet. And it reminds me of a story, which I've posted to my own LJ. I think more people should offer instant public bribes to stop obnoxiousness. Surely it's the American way.

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(no subject) - yonmei - Jan. 7th, 2006 11:46 am (UTC) Expand

(no subject) -

rollick - Jan. 7th, 2006 05:06 pm (UTC) Expand

thelastrobot wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 09:28 am (UTC)

Man. I love this story. I love that the woman can't believe what she's hearing. She can't believe that she should behave like a regular person in a public place. Man, "Why can't she just tune it out". Amazing.

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torificus wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 01:00 pm (UTC)

I am one of those stumbledinfrommetaquotes people who plague all the good quoted posts. I like you. :D

Also, it fascinates me that I like you and we have no common interests listed. I think I must friend you.

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themermaid wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 01:06 pm (UTC)

OMG that is funny. I would have loved to see the look on her face as she is trying to process what you said. The only thing better would have been a bidding war.

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magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 02:38 pm (UTC) Expand

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missfran - Jan. 7th, 2006 02:45 pm (UTC) Expand

small_chicken wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC)

Liquid awesome!

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haardvark wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:05 pm (UTC)

I apologize for this, but on the basis of this post I feel that I must friend you.

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vix1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:03 pm (UTC) Expand

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haardvark - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:19 pm (UTC) Expand

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magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:19 pm (UTC) Expand

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haardvark - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:35 pm (UTC) Expand

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outsidetheparty - Jan. 7th, 2006 08:48 pm (UTC) Expand

jdoh wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 03:41 pm (UTC)

You meet a soul mate on the train, I meet bloody drunks who want to rub their stiffies on me. I ride the wrong lines at the wrong times I guess.

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magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:21 pm (UTC) Expand

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blanx73 - Jan. 8th, 2006 12:42 am (UTC) Expand

lustronheloise wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 04:49 pm (UTC)

All I have to say is

Miss Jen, I give you my wreath of laurel.

If I were in charge of the CTA, you would replace Jack as the next poster girl. (And James Earl Jones would get to say "This is Library,State and VanBuren")

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Re: All I have to say is -

magdalene1 - Jan. 7th, 2006 04:53 pm (UTC) Expand

Re: All I have to say is -

postmoderngirl - Jan. 8th, 2006 04:03 am (UTC) Expand

nadyezhda wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 05:46 pm (UTC)

Man, as the Muzh says, "the family that snarks together, stays together." Let's hope this guy rides the train again with you. I'd even take out a little ad in the "missed connections" or whatever section of the paper it is to find him. ;)

Good for you though for standing up for yourself!

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muckefuck wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 07:14 pm (UTC)

I have come very, very close to handing $20 to young couples playing tonsil hockey on the seat in front of me and saying, "Here, this should buy you two an hour at a motel on Lincoln," but I'm sure they would tell me to "just tune it out" and "mind your own business" as well.

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nadyezhda - Jan. 8th, 2006 02:54 am (UTC) Expand

stealthmuffin wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 08:08 pm (UTC)

I am proud to be your minion.

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windswept wrote:

Jan. 7th, 2006 09:58 pm (UTC)

I echo everyone else - brilliant story, brilliant effort. :^)

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blanx73 wrote:

Jan. 8th, 2006 12:42 am (UTC)

My hero. This was priceless.

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mcduff wrote:

Jan. 8th, 2006 03:20 am (UTC)

Can I just point out how completely awesome you are? If it had been me on the train next to you, I'd have asked for your number.

Well, I wouldn't. But I'd have got off at my stop and wished I had. Which is probably what that guy did.

So. Yeaahhh.

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spritelord - Jan. 8th, 2006 05:39 am (UTC) Expand

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magdalene1 - Jan. 8th, 2006 02:59 pm (UTC) Expand

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mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 01:15 am (UTC) Expand

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magdalene1 - Jan. 9th, 2006 04:29 am (UTC) Expand

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mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 04:42 am (UTC) Expand

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spritelord - Jan. 9th, 2006 10:29 am (UTC) Expand

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magdalene1 - Jan. 9th, 2006 03:47 pm (UTC) Expand

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mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 12:53 am (UTC) Expand

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spritelord - Jan. 9th, 2006 10:27 am (UTC) Expand

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mcduff - Jan. 9th, 2006 03:20 pm (UTC) Expand

postmoderngirl wrote:

Jan. 8th, 2006 04:02 am (UTC)

For some reason, I thought I was reading this in

chicago_el and then I was really startled to realize I was actually reading your journal. It was a weird moment.

Also, today on the Brown Line, I heard a girl laugh and 100% thought it was you. I turned around and contorted myself to see who it was, and felt like a perfect idiot when I saw not-you. She definitely saw me checking her out, and I am dumb.

The end.

P.S. You have chutzpah! Good for you.

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(Anonymous) wrote:

Jan. 9th, 2006 08:23 pm (UTC)

Craigslist

NOW woman.

Get that boy's number.

-- Ender, Duke_of_URL

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