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Jun. 5th, 2007 @ 11:48 am Oi to the World (and everybody wins.)
Conundrum numero uno:

I've been acting like a Crazysaurus Rex lately...
I need to take a chill pill
Focusing on being mellow is probably a better alternative
Physiology is queer! (exclamation necessary)
I blame some sort of physiological malfunction for my behavior
Hopefully by this afternoon I will have reached equilibrium


Conundrum numero dos:

I want to find a balance between being nice to everyone and being selfish
Lately I just keep my mouth shut around those who deserve it
Then I go all Crazysaurus Rex on the innocent


Plan:
Breathe
Take a shower and shave legs... feeling like a cricket is nice*
Avoid irritating people for a while
Get stuff done


Things around me start changing tomorrow, hopefully that will help.





*Smooth legs are nice to rub together like a cricket does when it's making crickety noises.
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Eternal
May. 23rd, 2007 @ 08:58 pm (no subject)
Oh my.
Tonight I got beaten up.
Made paper planes, and pretended to hunt bears.
Also talked about various biological occurrences:

"Sharks bite peoples' heads off."

Now all I want to do is wander around in the foggy Summer night. Unfortunately I have nobody to wander with. I'm not ready to settle in tonight.
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Eternal
May. 9th, 2007 @ 06:39 am You're gonna need a heap of glue
When they all catch up to you, and they cut you up in two.


Listening to Death Proof songs will help me to get into the right road test mood right?
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Eternal
May. 2nd, 2007 @ 12:25 pm Last night I had a dream
My dorm room for next year was attached to a hockey arena, and I found a hamster in the hallway that was name Baby Chuck. Since there were two brothers with the last name Chuck who went to the school I decided it was probably theirs. There was a really famous brother who was named Prince Chuck had another brother who was shy and his name was Ryan Chuck. I ended up running into Prince Chuck first, and he was wearing an Elvis costume.

"You're not the King you're just Prince."
Meanwhile Baby Chuck had fallen asleep in my hand.

"Whatever. What do you want?"

"Is this yours? It has the last name Chuck."

"It is. You can have him is you want, he's really dangerous though."

I decided to keep Baby Chuck, because while he is curled up in my hand asleep he looks pretty much docile. Unfortunately when I brought him home to put in my aquarium he morphed into a pink beetle hamster. What Prince didn't tell me was that Baby Chuck was amphibious. He used his bright blue wings to fly away, and I had to chase him all around campus.

When I finally caught him it was hard to handle him, as he had an exoskeleton, but still had collapsible ribs. I made the aquarium half land and half water and covered the top with a screen. Baby Chuck was kind of feisty, but stopped running/flying away after that.
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Eternal
Apr. 18th, 2007 @ 02:26 pm i pooped
on my sister - kai
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Eternal
Apr. 14th, 2007 @ 11:29 pm (no subject)
Oh the relief.


















(I got accepted to UMO.)
About this Entry
Eternal
Apr. 3rd, 2007 @ 02:00 pm Excuse me Mister
I'm glad I've developed a resistance to stress, but some stuff still gets through. I think it's a build up. Most of these things individually do not bother me as much as they should.


Wish list:
For colleges to get back to me
To not have to worry about whether or not I will be able to pay for the things I need
Security
To have a talking to with whatever viruses or bacteria are living inside me
For people to limit their rudeness (Hannibal where are you?)
Maybe a frilly pink cocktail dress would be nice for being a Stomphia.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
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Eternal
Mar. 27th, 2007 @ 11:18 am (no subject)
I can't wait for school to start.

Backpacks and folders that I can pretend to keep organized
Papers to write at 3am while wearing jimjams
Getting lost on the way to the science lab

I need to learn again. Summer will be nice, but I'm looking forward to what comes next.
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Eternal
Mar. 14th, 2007 @ 11:34 pm Today
Today was a day of a great many distractions.

The weather has been magnificent lately. It's so nice that I've sprouted long pink ears and bang on drums all day.

Ms.Richman is my spiritual guide. We had a really long conversation today about life, gill arches, boys, travel, and the future. It wasn't good being out of touch. Plans were made so that I may go on the rest of the Marine Bio field trips.

I think I got into BU, because a lady from the Registrar called today, and said that they cannot send out acceptance letters without a withdrawal form from the previously attended college. If I was not accepted then my withdrawal form would not be a technicality worth trifling over now would it?

By chance I felt that I needed to buy pants today. Preferably Boyfriend Trousers. Claire Danes is so gosh darn cute... I am a consumer whore. I haven't bought the pants yet though. However, whilst journeying out to the Mall I discovered that Chels and Brit were there too.
Fooding and couch potatoing happened until it grew late.

For the most part a very good day.
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Eternal
Mar. 7th, 2007 @ 12:34 pm (no subject)
Everybody is talking about college. I want to know where I got in. I know I'm in UMO, as I have been accepted there before and with lower SAT scores, and fewer application requirements met. The rest are the tricky ones though. Ahhh.
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Eternal
Mar. 4th, 2007 @ 06:30 pm Porcicorns= Tragic Love
Sushi for brunch
Vintage clothes
Coffee shops
Sitting on rocks


Generally a very good day.

Also thank you Bert for being the most amazingly observant guy I know. You are very well loved. (Look at the porcicorn user pic.)
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porcucorns
Mar. 3rd, 2007 @ 03:11 pm (no subject)
I dyed my hair red. I officially look like Irish Barbie.

"Hey Ken where are my potatoes? I'm famished."

Luckily there's no hair problem that can't be solved with eye makeup.

I am currently tight in the middle of a great weekend!
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Eternal
Mar. 1st, 2007 @ 11:15 am I am an extraordinary machine.
Listening to Fiona Apple energizes me. Which is lovely considering how many forms I have to fill, bills I have to pay, and rooms I have to tidy.

Today will be productive. Then cake and pancakes galore. I need a good distraction. Tahlula-Henry died. I love my pets so much, and I take care of them. I know animals aren't supposed to live in captivity. I'm a bad pet owner.

Tahlula-Henry was a girl afterall. I researched. She looked like this:

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Bye baby.
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Eternal
Feb. 23rd, 2007 @ 07:00 pm (no subject)
Daydreaming is one of my strengths. When I'm bored I zone out until I am like an elephant seal on a dive (they go into comas). I have two modes. The first is social where I feel I can barely shut my eyes lest I miss a moment. The second is this comatose state; which I do not prefer. However daydreaming gives me a chance to organize my mind. They say that at night all of your memories from the day are filed and compressed. If I can witness this process then I have control of the filing.

Being a dreamer creates the potential for letdown, but it also helps to makes everyday life into art or an adventure. I'm not saying that I reside in Lala-land. The horrors and tragedies of life are magnificent in size, but they always shrink as time goes on. The magic of daydreaming is that something that happened years and years ago can seem just as glorious. My five year old self napping under bright sunflowers during the summer has the mind of my current day self, and the experience is no less meaningful. I'm proud of my younger self for realizing the importance of such an experience and storing it away.

Happy memories are the reason why relationships are so difficult to get over. First kisses remembered effect the stomach in the same way they did, but leave an ache that is hard to remove. Bittersweet is the word given to this phenomena. That is hard enough to deal with. Imagine having negative memories relived in this amplified way. I bet that's how PTSD happens. There is probably a filter in the human mind that helps us to deal with the past by blurring it.

I hope the future is not boring. I hope I can still create images that are exciting in my head.
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Eternal
Feb. 22nd, 2007 @ 12:47 pm Colossal Squid
The heaviest squid in the world was found by fishermen from New Zealand.

I should like to be a fisherman. Imagine the things one would see, and the adventures one would have. Linda Greenlaw is amazing. I'd feel bad killing the fish though. I could gut them if they were already dead, as long as they weren't a species that was under heavy pressures.
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Eternal
Feb. 17th, 2007 @ 10:04 am A problem, but no real answer.
Once there was a girl who knew the words to spout when struck by something. Simplicity was enough, but her fascination with it made her complex. Now she is a junkie. Life has either slowed down to a near comatose state or she has become numb. Interest, love, and curiosity for the world remain. Perhaps the problem is that world no longer holds those things for her. Time is up. The lights have turned off and everyone has gone home. Goodnight forlorn girl. Good luck with the rest of your life. Don't keep in touch. We are not as interested as you'd hoped.

I want to be appealing again. I want change. This is how average lifestyles are created. Sacrificing personality for comfort. I'm tired of it. The world should be electric again. I want to feel something positive in an extreme way. Doing anything one can to float above the surface of a negative situation is pathetic. Life is marked by peaks and valleys. I don't want to flat-line.
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Eternal
Feb. 13th, 2007 @ 11:44 pm Everything is pink and red...
I hope tomorrow is a good day
Valentine's Day has a tendency to be catastrophic
I looked up what different flowers meant today
If killing flowers didn't make me so sad I would like to be a florist like in Imagine You and Me (minus the lesbian part)
Yellow flowers are best
When I was little I used to take naps under huge sunflowers
Daffodils are happy flowers
I'm done being a Hallmark commercial now
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Eternal
Feb. 11th, 2007 @ 08:40 pm Baby Triops
Tahlula-Henry is still alive!
Shaking things up a little makes her show her face.
She's so big, I can't believe it.
I really was going to cry if she died.
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Eternal
Feb. 8th, 2007 @ 01:36 pm Only in dreams...
Days that are filled with plans seem so much nicer than lazy days. Lazy days are far too common lately. Starting yesterday this week should be a good one as far as plans go. Tonight there is going to be a late night Moulin Rouge watching extravaganza with Briggon.

Movies and songs bring me back to other times. There are some songs that are just so filled with emotion for me that I put them on the back burner a lot.

Built to Sleep for napping
Jewel for cleaning
Only in Dreams for feeling in love
Moulin Rouge for the good ol' days

Today I'm going to eat my pineapple chunks, clean, iHop (hopefully), work, and then stay up late with old friends.
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Eternal
Feb. 6th, 2007 @ 03:09 pm There's grace in my motion. I'm in control.
I wake up with a pit, and then things get clearer through the day. It's a wonder that I fall asleep thinking as much as I do. I've been avoiding LJ because it seems so superficial. Give the readers a glimpse into your mind, but never a door for them to walk into it. I should at least have a door for myself. I have a real journal that I've neglected because I'm worried what it will tell me. Today I wrote, and I feel better.

Being in control of my mind makes matters a lot easier.
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Eternal