| spot o blog |
[Oct. 2nd, 2007|01:07 pm] |
i might start posting on joshuastar.blogspot.com
actually, i posted today. so, i guess...i started posting on joshuastar.blogspot.com
uhm.
peace. |
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| hi. |
[Feb. 26th, 2007|11:54 am] |
i wrote this about two years ago. i just found it.
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i was swimming in the ocean, and i closed my eyes and thought about where i used to be, where i had that time, where i did that greatness, where it all made life! and i closed my eyes and stopped and i sank, and when i opened my eyes i was underwater, and my eyes were stinging and i couldn't breathe and i choked and i was being carried away and i didn't know where...the water was deep and i could touch no bottom...i cried, but it didn't matter, because water and salt were all around me...
i was swimming in the ocean and i closed my eyes and thought about where i would be when i was perfect, when nothing could harm me and these things didn't matter, and i closed my eyes and i stopped and i sank. and as i sank, i sang a song that i thought i would sing when i was where i was going to be, so grandiose and with an air of triumphance...i sang but the water entered my mouth and my nose and someone caught me like a crab and hauled me up to air, looked me in the face and ears and mouth and told me that i had no business singing a song like that in the shape i was in.
but where am i now?
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| ah.... |
[Jan. 8th, 2007|01:02 pm] |
ah...the quiet whine of the tires...the almost inaudible clack of the chain...a quiet wind cooling my face...
jerks in their pickups honking at me...
the daily commute.
listen people: if you're in a car. yeah, say you're in a car. and you've got two lanes at your driving disposal, not to mention a middle turn lane as well, don't freaking stay behind me and honk your horns expecting me to ride on the sidewalk. it's not going to happen.
it's not that hard to change lanes and go around me. i'm smaller than you, go half the speed you do, and have the right to be on the streets. deal with it.
i'll be so happy when i no longer have to take pensacola street to get to class.
this generally only happens to me between ocala and appleyard drive.
pensacola street is teh suck.
other than that, it was a beautiful day for a bike ride.
by the way...hi friends. how's it going. i've been absent.
to trent: i no longer live in that apartment. i miss it though. i lived there...uhm...3 or 4 moves ago. i'm married and live in a duplex in the center of town. it's nice! but it definitely lacks a loft with a spiral stair case...freaking a. |
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| Truly Golden |
[Dec. 4th, 2006|11:40 am] |
to spin with the world...is no help to me
I walk the creeking floors of this home.
a yellow flower has grown and He does chastize His own, love...
He gives a woman's touch. |
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[Oct. 23rd, 2006|11:03 am] |
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and to be quite frank, i'm not wearing deoderant today. |
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| things of late... |
[Oct. 23rd, 2006|10:34 am] |
| [ | the flood |
| |  excited | ] |
| [ | the feel |
| | elliott smith - basement II | ] |
well well.
hey there.
things:
1) tryna cut my hair saturday. awesome. free. a bonding experience. she won't let me cut hers though. i try to explain that it brings us closer together but...she won't listen. sigh.
2) bike riding. also awesome. friends...friends, no listen, friends, really...my first bike race is coming up this friday night. an alley cat type of race. you can look that up. i'm aiming for a place in the top 50%. either that, or dead last. DFL, they call it, though i'm not sure why.
3) gideons. i've met the gideons. they gave me a bible personally. at school today. gideons.
4) weather. it's cold out this morning. very windy. and friday night (see #2) is shaping up to be a cold and wet evening. i need to find my fingerless gloves and keep my knee warmed up.
5) lucas brunelle. drag race NYC. this inspires me. it's crazy things. you can look that up too.
6) music. i'm writing. slowly. i'm recording soon. hopefully.
some ifs related to #6:
if- i record
if- i like it
if- i decide on a packaging
if- you want one
if- you send me your address
if- you live out of town
if- i get around to it
if- you want to stop by and pick one up
if- we're lucky you can hear it.
7) prayer. now is the time to be praying for all friends for all things. we need to band together and do this. ask your friends for prayer and make time to pray at the time of asking. unity in ideal may not be as important as unity of action.
but these are my convictions.
joshua* |
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| Cool Hand Luke this sunday in Tallahassee |
[Oct. 6th, 2006|02:18 pm] |
Cool Hand Luke
@
Four Oaks Community Church
with
no opening bands!
for
FREE
and
$5 donations are accepted, if you can pay it.
doors
at 8pm
music
around 8:30pm
http://www.myspace.com/therealcoolhandluke
you really don't want to miss this. they've even got a few new songs.
joshua*
(xposted all over) |
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| wovenhand in atlanta monday night.... |
[Sep. 27th, 2006|10:19 am] |
| [ | the feel |
| | shai hulud - two and twenty misfortunes | ] |
hey guys:
i'm driving to atlanta monday and coming back tuesday.
want to come with me? i'm going to the wovenhand show and i hate to drive alone.
joshua* |
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| COOL HAND LUKE in taaaallahasseeeeee! |
[Sep. 22nd, 2006|10:34 am] |
that's right, paul newm--wait.
COOL HAND LUKE, everyone's favorite floodgate febrache (what does that mean??) is back together and is playing a welcome back show right here in tallahassee (with a capital T and that rhymes with C and that stands for "Cool!!")
here's what you need to know!!
COOL HAND LUKE
Sunday October 8th, 8pm
FREE with a suggested donation of $5...give if you can. gas is expensive!!
Four Oaks Community church (in their youth room)
no opening bands, no closing bands. just Cool Hand Luke and us kids.
i'll be there...so should you.
joshua* |
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| jeremy enigk... |
[Sep. 22nd, 2006|10:33 am] |
is coming to tallahassee.
november 20th. the cops, CURSIVE, and jeremy enigk. at the moon. $12-$15. free for fsu students.
jeremy enigk. and cursive, playing old and new stuff....
oh yes. |
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| build... |
[Sep. 13th, 2006|11:01 am] |
well, here i am again.
i'm in a computer lab and hot-diggity, i'm wearing a hoodie.
it's really not hoodie weather, but that's okay. it's raining out and i'll wear it if i please. and i please.
so, school. it's back on! and this semester so far is much easier. granted we're not even a third of the way through yet...i don't think.
but i've been reading "get in the van" by henry rollins. a friend let me borrow it. thanks keith z. it's very...interesting. rollins is one jacked up dude. the old hardcore/punk scene was also very jacked up. man, if kids today knew anything about kids back then...we'd have fewer posing punks. that's all i have to say.
i'm venturing to say that most people who go to shows these days have no clue what it's all about.
no clue.
on a more posi note, i'm involved in two musical endeavors. one is mainly just an idea and has a couple skeletal songs. the other has no songs but involves me "jamming" (like ms price's class) with a couple other guys. i'm playing bass in that one. both different...both very fun so farf. far, i mean. not farf. sorry.
okay, well. my running has subsided since i moved to the marriage house. since i'm back on sort of a schedule, i need to start running again. but i haven't.
my bike riding has also subsided, but i'm so totally itching to make myself a bicycle commuter. the blue bike i have (i wrote about it a few entries back) is not a bike i feel safe on...especially going down hills. so, i'm trying to improve it and at the same timne...i mean, time...at the same time, get a new bike.
alright now.
i'm going to my net...next. next class. yep.
have a good one.
God bless you and may He cause His face to shine upon you!
yeah!
joshua* |
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| hey!! |
[Sep. 8th, 2006|11:12 am] |
WHOA!!!
how'd i get here???
joshua* |
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| yeah! |
[Apr. 28th, 2006|10:51 am] |
how was THAT for an update!!
nothing, nothing, nothing, and all-a-sudden! bam! i take up your whole friends page!!
joshua* |
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| it's been a good bit. |
[Apr. 28th, 2006|09:54 am] |
yeah, it's been a while since i've updated proper. since i've comed correct.
so let's see.
what's happened since i can remember...?
i guess we'll start with--
wedding plans. going well. if your feelings are hurt, because you haven't received an invitation to our shindig: well, friends, kindly deal a little while longer, and refresh your love for me. us. me-us'. we haven't sent them out yet. ettiqute be hanged. that's "hang-ed", not "hanged". eh.
further seems forever. the last show i'll ever see of theirs. i really don't know how to explain it all. i will do a proper write up of it sometime soon. perhaps when they're officially done. "go your own way, i'll be with you. make mistakes and i'll forgive you. home is waiting here for you when you return." yes. yes-yes. i still get chills from this. it sounds stupid. but it's stupid cause it's true. hmm.
school. it's over! for now. strange to think that when i go back to class, i will be the Ringbearer. i will wield its power before me, and none ladies can lay a hand. yes, none ladies. to tell the truth, it will probably garner me more attention. but i will only laugh lauder. er louder, in their faces because: yes, that's right, they can't touch this.
no touchy.
but school. it's over! for now. it was my first semester as a full-time+ student. school is much less hectic than working full time. obviously, i'm glad i don't have to school (you) anymore, and if i were to make the decision, i would quit school (writing papers is no fun. at all.) but i know i made the right decision on going back and hittin' it hard. school, that is. hittin' the school. hard.
music. i've got a million ideas of things that i'd like to do. none of them have yet to fruit. that's "fru-it", not "fruit." i keep thinking that this is going to be the year. hopefully it still will be. semesters make you busy.
i'm not in the habit of pointing people to myspace. but in the meantime, go listen to something that you will probably refuse to like:
http://www.myspace.com/yellowcrystalstar - it's tallahassee experimental/noise-y. inspired by Acid Mothers Temple, used to be. his writing has matured since. plus, he's a nice guy with long straight hair. why not. maybe you will like it.
bike. i've got a bike. (youcanrideitifyoulike,it'sgotabasketabellthatringsandthingstomakeitlookgood.i'dgiveittoyouificouldbutiborrowedit. shine on you sydley diamond.) yes. i have a blue bike. from krankitup. it was mostly put together. but i added some things to it (like tires and tubes) and adjusted some things, and it still needs much work. i would love to be able to ride around town, instead of drive. gas is expensive. bike riding is rewarding. and tiring. like running. which, aside from this week, i've also been doing. i enjoy that alot. and it make me healthy. it make me healthy!!
impending field day. yes. the failed plan from our previous new years day celebration will finally come to pass this summer. don't quote me on that. it will be fun. OH! the summer months!!! the lack of school!! the FRISBEE GOLF!! i can't wait to get back into it.
also music. i've been trying to figure out the name of a specific song for about the last five years or so. i've been actively searching it out for the last two. it's a song from the 80's that used to play all the time, and the video used to play all the time and it was catchy. is catchy. i finally figured it out last week. it's "Steppin' Out" by Joe Jackson. it's a good song. the video is something from my childhood. it came out when i was 2 or 3. it does very wierd things to me when i hear it. you should listen to it. sometimes i'll be laying still and quiet, and for no reason whatsoever, images from the video of a late-night new york skyrise flash in my mind. very strange.
sometimes, when i'm praying, or singing praises to Jesus, i get something that's like an image, but also like a feeling, but also like an idea or a concept, but also something more. i will never be able to explain this to make you understand. but sometimes when i'm doing that, i get the concept (and sometimes a vague picture) of something that's really big and at the same time, really small. really large and wide, and really skinny and thin. it switches back and forth, but it's really both at the same time. the only thing i can say about the image itself is, it's sort of like a closeup of your fingerprint, and it switches from that to being like a very thin sowing needle. sometimes, it's as huge as a world, and sometimes it's smaller than i can hold.
i'm not making this up.
these images/concepts are (or rather, this image/concept is) something that i remember having when i was a very young child, and they started recurring a few years ago. it's like a childhood nightmare that you all of a sudden wake up with when you're 32. but good. comforting. there's a sense of infinite there. what is it?
i've always wondered if this is the reason that "big world" on super mario 3 is my favorite: normal things that are surreal-ly larger than normal.
but that's a poor example or analogy. this is something infnitely large and at the same time infinitely small.
and it represents itself as images, or emotions when i seem to catch hold of it.
have a good day, all you.
joshua* |
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| remember the widows and orphans.... |
[Apr. 16th, 2006|07:10 pm] |
http://www.invisiblechildren.com/theMovement/globalNightCommute/?location=FLORIDA+-+Tallahassee
every one: go sign up to be a part of this.
here's the deal. every night in Uganda, children have to run miles and miles from where they live and work to "safe havens" or larger cities, to avoid a terrorist group that calls themselves the Lord's Resistance Army, led by a man named Joseph Kony, who claims to be a Christian and a prophet. He obviously is neither.
this group terrorizes, abducts, maims, kills and worse the people of northern uganda.
their modus operandi is to increase their ranks.
they do this, mainly two ways:
1) kidnap boys, train them and brainwash them into soldiers for their army.
2) rape women to impregnate them. if it's a boy, he's raised as a soldier. if it's a girl, they either kill her or make her a slave, and when she's older, they rape her too.
this is just an overview of what they do. other atrocities include, but are not limited to:
1) cutting off ears, lips, fingers, toes, etc of anyone who makes them mad, or tries to escape.
2) forcing children to kill their parents (and then spend the night with their bodies.)
3) forcing children to kill other children who are being difficult, slow to travel, or sickly.
these children have to run to a safer place, because the LRA attacks mainly rural areas.
the government of uganda is poor and seems to want help, but sometimes is wishy washy about fixing the problem.
the wierdest part of this is,
this has been going on for years and years, and just now is the international community willing to talk about it, and announce to the world that "hey...may be a problem..."
this global night commute is a way to raise awareness in tallahassee (or wherever you live...this is happening all over the world next weekend) by shadowing the ugandan children...displacing ourselves and sleeping in a public place.
it's sort of like a silent protest against a lack of action.
get. involved.
especially if you're in tallahassee. even if you THINK you might go...sign up anyways.
tell other people.
this is a big deal.
let me know if you want more information...this is obviously just a summary of the problem.
i'll tell you what i can.
joshua* |
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| portland? not maine, silly... |
[Mar. 29th, 2006|04:10 pm] |
so....
has anyone been to portland? and if so...does anybody know cool things to do there?
joshua* |
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| who's laughing now...who's laughing now?? |
[Mar. 23rd, 2006|05:01 pm] |
http://www.myspace.com/tallybikerace
this looks like it's shaping up to be a heck-a-lotta fun.
so check it out.
joshua* |
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[Mar. 17th, 2006|12:55 pm] |
Fri., April 7 - FURTHER SEEMS FOREVER (last tour ever!) w/ Enmasse (members
of Moments In Grace & FSF) & band tba - doors @ 9pm, show @ 9:30pm, $13
advance tickets on sale at Vinyl Fever, CD Warehouse, FSU Fine Arts Ticket
Office & Ticketweb.com, $15 day of show, all ages
for more dates, go here: http://www.myspace.com/fsf
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
this is a big deal...the last further seems forever show in tallahassee.
they've been playing here for years, but now it's over, and they made it a point to come here one more time.
let's show em some love...
joshua* |
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[Mar. 16th, 2006|11:39 am] |
computer labs are fun.
i don't want to go to astronomy class.
joshua* |
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[Mar. 3rd, 2006|02:24 pm] |
| [ | the feel |
| | appleseed cast - mare vitalis | ] |
"i promise you with warm salt air
hallowed breezes through your hair
days on end and days long gone
the beach and the fires and the nights are gone
flow
tide
ebb
road
night
sky
sand
home
the fair in the park by the sea in my heart is never gone"
that's gotta be in my top 50 of best songs ever.
joshua* |
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