Via mindykim:

In an effort to plow through the billions of pounds of crap I've amassed over my (nearly) 28 (!!!) years on the planet, I'm going to be selling off things I don't use but can't part with. I'm going to give anyone on my f-list who's interested a crack at it first, then go to the for_sale community, then Craigslist, then Amazon, then eBay. Maybe a yard sale in there somewhere.

I want David and I out in a new apartment by the end of the year at the latest; 10/1/08 is my goal moving date, and I need to both get rid of as much crap as possible so I don't have to pack it and move it and unpacked AND because I need money to buy:

New bedroom set
New desk
New living room set
New kitchen set

My parents either trashed or usurped anything I brought from WA/MD with me, and so now David and I will be starting out from scratch. They *say* they'll buy us a new living room set, but they're idea of what things cost is still from the 1950s and I'd like to be able to pay the difference rather than be a bitch and stick it to them with "Well, you SAID you'd buy WHATEVER I wanted when you took MY living room set, which was a WEDDING GIFT, if you recall...."

So, if you think you'd be interested in:

Clothes (Juniors size 11/12 and 13/14 + misses sizes 10-14)
CDs/DVDs
Toys (My Little Pony/Smurfs/board games, etc.)
Make up (Body Shop & Bare Essentials)
...and MORE!

then comment below and I'll add you to my selling my soul filter.

Cheers.

• 16:09 We're at Bar Anticipation, w\RU alum assoc. gettin drunk. More later. #

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• 17:09 Dear USA, please stop treating illegal immigration like a disease. You cant catch it; it's a choice to break a law. It wont lead to anarchy. #

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For various reasons, such as that I've been listening to a lot of music from the 90s recently, I've just entered into a really shit bargaining session with the current owners of bitterfame.com

Me: How much will you sell the domain for?
Them: It's not currently for sale, but we will entertain offers.
Me: How much do you believe the domain to be worth?

You see, for those of you who haven't been keeping up with me since forever, I used to own that domain. I was a day late with my monthly payment (I paid hosting and domain registration on a monthly plan back in the day) in 2002 and it was sold out from under me. I'm not sure what I'd do with it if I got it back, but I'm curious to see what their price is. I know from salary negotiations that one should never, ever be the first to state a monetary amount in negotiations. If these people know that as well, this could be an interesting night. Will keep you posted.

My life needs more explosions and awesomeness.

Below is the Entertainment Weekly's list of 100 Classic Movies of the past 25 years. Bold the ones you've seen, underline the ones you plan to.

1. Pulp Fiction (1994)
2. The Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-03)
3. Titanic (1997)
4. Blue Velvet (1986)
5. Toy Story (1995)
6. Saving Private Ryan (1998)
7. Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)
8. The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
9. Die Hard (1988)
10. Moulin Rouge (2001)
( EW's list is full of shit )

I hate having a window unit instead of proper central air. It means I'm freezing my ass off in the middle of July. Not fair.

Hi, I'm God.

( Disclaimer: if you are religious, this will probably offend you at some point. )
Sincerely,

God.

PS: To answer a few FAQs

1. I'm neither male nor female. Stop asking.

2. Last year, I was rooting for the Giants. How else do you think they won?

3. I wouldn't vote for any of your political candidates in any of your countries.

4. Yes, they do have fries in England, but there they call them chips!

I just returned from Las Vegas and finished going through 500+ emails, so I definitely not going to be able to catch up on LJ and am thus declaring LJ Friends List Bankruptcy.

If something awesome/horrible/amazing happened to you, please comment below with a link to the entry so I can see it and share in your joy/sorrow/other appropriate emotion.

Thanks! :D

• 07:28 Just heard an ad for puppy Adderall called Poise? WTF! More later. #

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• 13:22 4 products so far. #

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• 16:10 I don't ever seem to get anything done. I am a failure. #

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Tonight, and for many of the past few nights, Hilary Clinton has reminded me of Gir:

"I'm running! I'M RUNNING! WHEEEEEEEEEEE!"

With absolutely no aim, direction, or reason to continue to do so, she runs.

She runs, and she runs, and she runs, without stopping.

And yet, her plans, plots, and general platforms seem to be on par with Zim's knowledge of world domination: sometimes she succeeds but only with modest gains (such as when Zim tricked Dib into believing his entire life was a success just to find out if he was the one who threw a muffin at Zim) but mostly, her words and ideas tend to remain in the realm of piggy time machines and a terrifying room with a moose.

Just concede already, bitch, if you want another shot at running in 4-8 years, that is!

So, I decided a few days ago to become more active in online communities, for the sake of getting to know more people. When I'm in the mood to be around people, I want to be surrounded, and I've been feeling a little isolated lately.

So, what did your genius narrator do? Get into a fight, natch.

It went down something like this. I replied to a post. Someone replied to tell me I'm wrong. I say I have statistics and studies. They say, show me your studies, your studies show them me. So, I did. Said individual went "Well, that was a bad study."

I asked questions about sample populations, controls, methods, and statistics in the study, as I'd only read the abstract and the media reporting surrounding the study.

What the other person replied with made no sense and seemed like not only bad science but ridiculously inept scientific experimental design. So I spent twenty minutes reading a study and refuted everything the girl said with the study, in a "I could be wrong, but it seems to me."

So then she changed her tune and told me some other major design flaws, which I found contradiction for in the text of the study.

Finally, she posted that if I just did more research, I'd find more people who disagreed with the study just like she did because it's so majorly flawed. I was tempted to ask for citations of these scholars who disagree with her, and then re-read her comment, which ended with: "Do a little more research. You're almost there."

FUCK THAT.

That set me off.

I restrained myself enough not to throw in the "And what school did you go to that taught you scientific method and theory, statistics, and experimental design, be cause my fucking degree came from Rutgers University" but instead just called shenanigans. I tore into the fact that every thing she said was repeatedly refuted by the article itself, without outside sources, and asked did she even read the actual article or did she just read what the BBC or the Guardian said, decide she didn't like it, and then find a bunch of bloggers who didn't agree either and decide that was enough to prove that these scientists were idiots.

She replied, but I didn't bother reading it. I'm supposed to be making friends, not enemies, and I'm this close to bitchslapping this retarded cunt straight into outerspace.

(It should also be noted I used my new icon throughout the exchange. That may have had some effect. Maybe I should seek therapy.)

• 11:49 Animal Planet promo rained out 2 hrs after it started. #

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• 12:57 In Manayunk for day 3 of this promotion. I am so freaking tired! #

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I like how my preferred user name, joellevand, is for the most part a completely mystery to most people as to what it actually is. Is it Joel Levand? Joelle Vand? Joe L Levand? (In actuality, it's Joelle Van D, a character from Infinite Jest.)

The sexual ambiguity of the name makes for some interesting exchanges in message boards and forums, especially when it comes to Hillary Clinton. Now, I'm going to be honest with you. I don't like the woman. I have varied reasons why this is, far too many to enumerate here and now, but what cracks me up is when I say something critical about Ms. Clinton under my user name, it is automatically assumed that:

a. I'm sexist
b. I'm male

Even though we know that women tend to be more vicious when it comes to attacks on other women.

Take for example a post about how Hillary continues to stick her foot in her mouth in public. Like many other commentors, I posted:

"Hillary ought to just sit back and keep her mouth shut; she's run out of feet to stick in it by now."

The first reply:

"Yeh, and I'd bet you'd like her to iron your shirts too!"

I was totally taken aback. What the fuck? But then, after thinking about it, I said, Yes, actually, it'd be nice to have *someone* iron my shirts, since my husband never gets around to it.

If I had a user name like PrincessSparklePony or GrrlsKickAss, I imagine that comment would never have been made to me.

I suppose it reflects this bizarre martyr complex that Hillary and her supports have taken on. Not only is it a perfect copy of Bush's "if you're not with us, then you're against us" mentality re: everything, but it also seems so childish to throw "if you don't like me, you're sexist!" around. Funny how I'm a woman who, as a little girl, wanted to be President when I grew up, who would gladly vote for a female president if it was someone like Olympia Snowe, who isn't usually into partisan politics and tries to vote along the lines of what her constituents want.

It's this kind of mentality, by the way, that had me hating all feminism throughout most of the 90s, though I can't entirely blame Hillary for that. In NJ, there's always been a liberal bend that borders on insanity, and I was surrounded by women who didn't want equality but superiority, who would assert that women (such as myself) who believed they could be happy living at home as struggling writers and kept women were brainwashed by the fascist patriarchy and saw sexism in every photograph, every film, every book created by men. It took several years out of this state, in the Pacific Northwest and in England, for me to meet women who were just looking to make the same as a man, dollar for dollar, and have all opportunities available to them based on their skills and abilities, not handed to them with lessened restrictions because they don't have a penis.

(I can't tell you how much I hated the whole Citadel cadet thing in the 1990s when people were saying the men treating the female cadet like one of the guys was sexist. What the fuck? Isn't that the definition of equality, to be treated the same as everyone else, not with kid gloves because she possess different genitalia? If we make it easier for women to get into the military or police/firefighting/EMT jobs by easing requirements for them, aren't we essentially saying that women are a weaker sex and cheapening the value of the job itself?)

And all of this comes back to Hillary because I think she and her people are using her gender to gain sympathy. You can't manipulate people by crying for votes and then want people to treat you the same as a man, when if a man cried, it would not give him the same advantage. If you're going to use a stereotype about women in your favor, you cannot then bitch that people aren't treating you the same as man because you started off by differentiating yourself based on gender stereotypes!

Moreover, there are a lot of people I don't like, male and female, gay and straight, white and black. Disliking someone who happens to be a female doesn't automatically make me, or anyone, sexist -- especially if it is for reasons that have nothing to do with gender. Furthermore, to label me sexist because you believe I am male is absolutely sexist on your part, and you might want to follow my advise to Ms. Clinton yourself, lest you too end up with both feet in your mouth, plus several more.

• 06:03 On way to promo in Center City. #
• 06:54 At event location. No one else here. I got out of bed for this? #
• 07:46 No one showed. Going home. #
• 08:46 at home now. My face hurts. I hate allergies. Still have no idea what happened to the promo today. :( #
• 10:43 I'm starting to question whether I should have run that story on BoM or not. Hmm. :( #
• 19:53 Family outings suck. #

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