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Fuh Lord I-A
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Jul. 26th, 2006 @ 01:32 am
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I've moved to the land of swamps and alligators and impossible hockey teams and hurricanes and drug trafficking and high school teacher seductresses and child molesters who bury their victims alive and oxygen stores on every corner and rednecks and phallic geography. That's right. I've moved to Florida. I am here. Here I am.
Life is odd. Lots of driving, lots of craaaazy things to shoot. My bungalow has hardwood floors. On the ceiling. |
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Fear the Fist
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Apr. 15th, 2006 @ 11:36 pm
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I was going through the archives and I came across an old photoshop job I did freshman year. I'd completely forgotten about it and how awesome it is. See if you can figure out who the supporting cast is and the ironies therein.
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Best Week Ever
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Mar. 17th, 2006 @ 02:58 pm
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So, ladies and gents, it looks as though I'll be moving to Florida after graduation. My brilliant scheme to net me a post-grad internship actually worked. I'll be spending six months working for my favorite paper in the entire country, the St. Pete Times. It's the largest paper in the state of Florida, very much the best, and some of my favorite shooters work there. What makes it particularly special is the fact that it's owned by Poynter, a non-profit institute dedicated to better journalism. The paper's profits go back into the paper, not some corporate asshole's coffers. The paper is beholden to the people, not the advertisers. It's a dream come true.
How in hell did I land such an awesome gig? I drove down to Florida on my spring break and handed in my application personally. Also, I'm cool. |
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Feb. 27th, 2006 @ 01:58 am
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Life is good right now. I have a written list of concerns.
Career: I'm freelancing at the Banner Herald, and elsewhere. Still applying to and waiting to hear back from internship opportunities.
Education: I only have three classes. I got an A on my first test in one of them. I haven't done a lick of work for the other two. I really should get on top of that. I also need to late-add an extra hour, preferably a photo-related project. Trouble is, I can't think of a single damn idea for a story that I'd be willing to phone in between now and May.
Love: I love what I do, I love my family. Anything else would hinder priority #1, my career. I'm alright with that.
Sex: I've finally begun to rebuild my harem. Things are fine in this department.
Weight: I don't own a scale, but if I had to guess, I wouldn't be too happy.
Appearance: Hair is good, body is good enough, face is the same, clothes need constant updating.
Fitness: Major deficiencies in this department. My balance, endurance, and strength are at all-time lows. I'm trying to take up mountain biking, but don't want to spend too much on a bike. I will buy your used mountain bike that's collecting dust in your garage.
Physical Health: Hunky dory. Except my vision keeps getting worse and my eye doctor warned me not to dive or engage in contact sports lest my retinas detach. Scary.
Mental Health: Solid. I'm happy, if a little restless and anxious. I seem to be entering another semi-nihilist phase, but it will pass.
Social Activity: Picking up. I have opportunities to go out on the weekends and most week nights. Living downtown helps. I don't mind walking around the neighborhood at midnight meeting new people.
Intellectual Stimulation: Meh. I need to read more books and smart-folk magazines. Class ain't doing anything for me.
Friends: No one I'd trust with my life, but a healthy number of people I'd trust with the keys to my apartment.
Family: They miss me. I miss them. I call my mom a lot. I ask her for money and advice. I call my dad from time to time. We talk politics. I need to get my brother and sister-in-law a housewarming gift. They moved in to their new home on Friday.
Social Skills: I'm as abrasive as ever. I've wholeheartedly embraced straightforwardness and feel that diplomacy in social matters only distorts the reality and truth of the matter. I will tell you that you look fat in that dress. The kind of people I want to be friends with will appreciate this. No bullshit.
So that's that. My semi-annual LJ update. Synopsis: I'm doing a'ight. |
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Jan. 26th, 2006 @ 11:56 pm
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Goodbye Tyler "the Golden Retriever" Golden II. You were my best friend and the best dog a family could have. You were loyal and brave and noble and smarter than your flunkage of obedience school might lead many to believe. At times you resembled a bear and at other times you resembled a luck dragon, which is how we liked to think of you. You were afraid of ladders and doors and later on, stairs because you were afraid of falling. You loved pants and often licked them for no discernible reason. Once, we let you out to pee and when you lifted your leg, the wind blew you over. You were mortified and we laughed heartily at your expense. Your nose could pry the strongest arm up and onto your head for petting purposes. You loved to dash through the house in circles and then attack me, but if I ever said 'ow' when you bit, you'd stop biting and start licking. You were terrified of mom, but you loved and worshiped her and always stayed out of the forbidden rooms, at least when she was around. You were dad's favorite kid and could manipulate him into doing anything you wanted. You were gentle and played nicely with children and let birds ride around on your back. You were a 'good boy' and I just know you're gonna love doggie heaven where you can jump up on the couches and chase rabbits in big green fields and meet lots of other great dogs and sniff their butts and when you want a good head scratch, you can go visit people heaven and everyone will shower love on you because they have all the time in the world now and aren't too busy working to play with you and pet you. I hope we gave you a good life. You certainly made ours better for having loved you. |
| » Cookie decorating in the Golden household |
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We had xmas early this year, and my sister-in-law baked gingerbread men. She was busy prepping the prime rib, so she asked me to decorate them. My gingerbread men and women are a little more deviant than the ginger-folk you see on tv. This one is definitely my masterpiece:
It's the chick from Total Recall with 3 jugs.
Dec. 23rd, 2005 @ 07:50 pm
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| » New Digs |
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I'll be returning to Athens in the Spring. I will have three classes MWF. I will be living downtown in a hot little studio on the 6th floor of University Tower in downtown Athens. I will walk to class in the morning and stumble home drunk at night. I will start a band.
I insist I'm going to have the time of my life for the next few months. You're invited to come join the party, but only if I like you.
Dec. 20th, 2005 @ 10:35 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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I have a crush on an intellectual cowboy. Literally, he's a cowboy that happens to be pretty sharp. This may be the hottest combination of intelligence and manliness I've ever encountered. He threatened to hog-tie me with my own scarf in under 8 seconds. Wow. I'm so over intellectual rockstars.
Intellectual cowboys are most definitely the new hotness.
Nov. 12th, 2005 @ 09:04 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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I have learned that it is possible to drown cockroaches. So, lemme get this straight... they can survive nuclear holocaust, but not water? What kind of weak-ass weakness is that? I seem to recall a plot revolving around a weakness to water... oh yeah, Unbreakable. That movie sucked my nuts.
*Secretary, take a letter please:*
Stop making movies M. Night Shamalamadingdong. You are an embarrassment to all of cinema.
Your friend,
Golden McGoldsteinbergmanschultz
Nov. 1st, 2005 @ 10:22 pm
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| » On Inconsiderate Douche Bags |
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Douche Bag is my descriptor of the week, perhaps even the month. I am encountering them left and right like never before. Perhaps before now, I didn't have the words to properly describe them.
Saturday was a banner day for inconsiderate douche bags:
At the GA game, a fellow shooter I knew mentioned to me that a videographer's tape was not in his camera. It was sticking out, but he had no idea and was filming like it was in. I suggested that the guy go alert the videographer. He said "If he's that stupid, let him suffer." I promptly went up and informed the guy and he thanked me. As I was walking back to my position next to the shooter, I said loudly, "It's called professional courtesy, you douche bag." It felt real good to say. Also, I got mega karma points out of the whole experience. I can only hope that someday if I leave a lens cap on or something, someone will let me know before I fuck up my shoot.
Saturday night I drove to Atlanta. I wanted to meet a hot prospect for drinks. I could have gone back to Macon the back way, but I chose Atlanta because I wanted to see him. I called and made arrangements. I was to call him back after I grabbed dinner with a friend and then we were definitely going to meet up later in the night. I called after dinner and got voicemail. I left a message. I never got a return call. I got stood up. WHO THE FUCK WOULD STAND ME UP????!?!?!?!?!? More importantly, why? I'm still waiting to hear an explanation, and goddamn it, I fully expect one.
There were more douche bags on Saturday, sure, but these are the two stories that stand out.
Fucking douche bags.
Oct. 25th, 2005 @ 01:41 am
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| » The Bitch is Back |
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Mo-orning, theatre lovers!
Been AWOL from my LJ. Sorry about that. I was moving and shit.
I had no utilities for 8 days.
No electricity, AC, hot water, or internet.
That blew a tremendous amount of cock.
Anyway, I'm back in the game. I'm continuing to take lots and lots of pictures. It finally paid off in a Georgia Press Association clip contest first place feature photo win for the month of July. That give me more points than, like 80 other professional photographers in the state of GA. I think I'm currently in 15th place for the year, which is not bad considering I only started entering photos in July.
You may henceforth refer to me as you friend, Golden, the award-winning photojournalist.
Reading back, when I say it paid off, I don't mean to say that winning contests is the only validation of my career/existence. Shit, I love what I do and the very act is beyond rewarding. I have found my purpose in life and I get to spend my days fulfilling my destiny. That kicks so much ass, my foot hurts.
Um, so I've been busy these past few weeks with Katrina refugees, the governor, and a shit ton of football. As sacreligious as what I am about to say is, I mean it: I like shooting Ga Tech games. The light in the stadium is better, the fans are mellower, and the game is somehow more enjoyable.
Basically, life is cool. I have a cool job, a cool boss, cool coworkers, and a cool apartment. I don't really get to party anymore and I'm not getting laid, but I don't suppose you can have it all, eh? Falling in love sure would be the icing on the delicious cake that is my life right now, but cake is still pretty yummy sans icing.
Sep. 14th, 2005 @ 10:43 pm
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| » Divebombing the Cotton and Sipping Mint Juleps |
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I definitely rode in a crop duster today. I made the pilot land early because I was gonna spew. It was awesome. We dive-bombed the fields like that plane in North by Northwest. Except we were in the plane. Yeah.
I also got a place to move into next month. It's a studio apartment in an historic house in Macon's most historic district. Everything is being renovated as I type. New electric, plumbing, paint, carpeting, appliances... it's awesome. It even has one of those beds that folds back into the wall. I've always wanted one of those. Y'all must come visit me in my cozy apartment in my giant Southern mansion. We can sip mint juleps on the front porch. It will be positively delightful.
Aug. 17th, 2005 @ 11:22 pm
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| » Bunny |
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I want a pet bunny rabbit. I might go to the flea market and get one. But I might also fail to feed it after I do and come home after a week-long bender to find that it has resorted to eating its own feet for sustenance. I don't need to see that shit.
Aug. 14th, 2005 @ 11:31 pm
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| » WOOT |
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I got a gig for this fall. They've asked me to stay on at the Telegraph and work a paid internship up in the Main office instead of the bureau. I bought a bottle of Ketel One to celebrate. It's calling my name from the freezer, but I don't want to drink it alone. Thinking about coming up to Athens tomorrow. I'll bring it with me if this is the case.
This is the last thing I expected. I done good. Real good. Hard work really does pay off. Sometimes.
I gotta move to Macon now. I want a gay roommate. Just because.
Aug. 11th, 2005 @ 08:13 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Looks like I'll be going back to school in the Spring. Grady managed to schedule the three classes I needed at non-conflicting times, so all I have to do now is actually apply to Grady, get accepted, transfer this internship credit from SPIA to Grady, get permission to take two of the classes at the same time, and get the job as the photo editor at the Red and Black.
All in a day's work.
Also, I'll be needing another internship for this Fall, so I've applied to a paper in Augusta. That would be really freaking sweet and convenient.
...I just gotta get that Pulitzer before I turn 30 so I can lecture at all the photojournalism conferences and seduce the nubile young interns and students. It's a vicious cycle of incestuous photo depravity.
Aug. 2nd, 2005 @ 12:12 am
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| » $$$ |
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I bought a very expensive camera today. I need a couple of freelance gigs to cover it. Anyone got any weddings or headshots or tasteful nudes that need to get photographed? I'm your girl.
I think on Monday I'll call Grady to see if they've figured out the spring schedule yet. If I can get my second degree, I will. If not, I'm going to start looking for a real job. By real job, I still mean my fantasy dream job as a photojournalist.
Jul. 16th, 2005 @ 11:42 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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A car! A car! My kingdom for a working car!
-I'm taking the ole hunk of shit into the shop tomorrow morning. I think it's the alternator. Let's hope I make it to the shop.
Florida boy finally contacted me. I was beginning to get over him and was comfortable in my decision to pretend I'd never met him. Guess it just doesn't work like that.
He told me he was planning on coming up this weekend. But, you know, Hurricane Dennis is coming. He's got to work. I can't blame him for having to cover the storm. I'd be there shooting it myself if the paper wanted to send me. Well, so much for writing him off.
Jul. 8th, 2005 @ 12:29 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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I think I might have hit it off with the hot writing intern from Northwestern today. He's 21, so a little too young to date (that would be unprofessional anyway, right?) but just right for a good times companion.
I suggested to him that people down here would warm up to him a lot faster if he developed a southern accent to use on the job. I told him he sounded like a carpet bagger.
I've found that there is an internationally positive response to the southern accent. People are a lot more likely to like you. It sounds warm and friendly. However, non-southerners tend to assume you're soft in the head. This can be used to one's advantage. They never see the southerner coming. How do you think we've ended up with so many southern presidents and vice-presidents? Even that New England fop, Chimpy McFlightSuit knew what was good for him and played the good ole boy card with astounding success.
Jun. 29th, 2005 @ 11:28 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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I couldn't get to sleep last night. I've never been so lonesome in my life. I'm not used to it yet. I don't know anyone here and everyone at the office seems to be married and or too old to hang out with. I can't go out on my own to bars and the like in a town like this, so I'm currently friendless in a new town.
The internship is going swimmingly well, but what are my successes without friends to celebrate?
Jun. 29th, 2005 @ 09:18 am
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| » Everything's Coming Up Milhouse |
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I moved into my new apartment yesterday. There's a big lake and gazebos and geese and a really nice swimming pool. I have a kitchen and a washer and dryer. I have my very own bachelorette pad. I need to start throwing swanky parties.
I went to the main office in Macon today. I met some cool people and reunited with old friends. I also took a drug test. I passed, but I thought the whole experience was rather demeaning.
They want to get me started shooting ASAP since I'm already here. Yay!
Jun. 23rd, 2005 @ 07:19 pm
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i_am_golden's journal