[fic] Death Note, "Let Him Eat Cake"
For mackzazzle, who plays the most fantastic L in CFUD, and was currently feeling grumpy and wanted some Light/L pr0n.

Let Him Eat Cake
Death Note
L/Light
Not safe for work. Minor spoilers for... I'm not even sure what chapter it is. Haha. ...minor spoilers, but definitely before chapter 50.



"Eat or talk," Light said, irritably, eyeing L.

L blinked at him, the plate still balanced on the tips of his fingers, his other hand poised with the fork still clasped loosely between his fingers. "I was doing both," L pointed out.

"That's the problem."

L tilted his head; Light was looking less than impressed with him, his cheek resting on his hand. One of his fingers was tracing out his own lower lip with a slow, irritated pace, like he wanted to be drumming his fingers instead.

It was, perhaps, not the most comforting of realizations that he was staring at Light's lips. "Ah," L said. "I'll finish eating, then." He took a forkful of his cake and curled his lips down over the fork's prongs, dragging it slowly clean.

Light sighed, abrupt and irritated. "It's probably more important to discuss this."

"More important than to eat?" L blinked at him; Light had started to chew on the corner of his lips with a most enticing flash of teeth. Strange, L thought, how hungry he was lately, as if the movement of Light's mouth was reminding him of desserts left untasted. He took another forkful of cake, getting a great deal of the whipped cream on top. "But, Light-kun, we've already gone over all the evidence so far. Unless you have something you'd like to add?"

Scowling at him, Light's eyes narrowed; the slight movement of his head forward cast a terribly intriguing play of shadows across his features. Really, L thought, the lighting could do such interesting things. "Why," Light asked, "would I want to do that."

"I'm not entirely sure, Light-kun," L said, wide-eyed. He tapped his fork against his lips, toes curling on the edge of the chair. "But I'm not sure what else there is to talk about right now."

Light stood up abruptly, turning away, crossing the room with a few steps. He slammed his hands down onto the desk in front of one of the screens. His trousers were fitting remarkably closely, L noticed, and licked his fork thoughtfully. He caught himself at it a moment later and frowned; terribly inappropriate, really. "We're getting nowhere," Light said, and L wondered at the frustration in his voice; it had to be false, after all. "Whoever Kira is, he's just too good."

"Ah?" L took another slow, comfortable bite; the tastes mixed coolly in his mouth. "Surely you aren't thinking of giving up, Light-kun?"

"No, that's not -- no," Light said, and turned back, glowering. "I just -- will you stop eating all the time?"

L watched as Light stalked back over to glare at him. "Ah, but Light-kun," he said. "You haven't had a problem with it before. And my abilities will decrease if I don't maintain my sugar intake."

"That's not the point," Light snapped. "Just you, always, your mouth, you don't stop--"

Ah; perhaps Light was also hungry. L took a forkful of cake and held it up. "Did you want some of mine?"

Light's mouth dropped open and he seemed utterly shocked; L took advantage of the opportunity to slide the fork into Light's mouth.

Nothing to do but swallow then, which Light did, scowling sort of helplessly at L. When L tugged the fork out of Light's mouth and placed it back against his own lips, he saw that some whipped cream had gotten onto Light's upper lip, and Light was making no move to wipe it off.

"Oh dear," L said, and reached up, thumbing it. He slid his thumb into Light's mouth a moment later. "Here. Lick."

Light's expression had gone bizarrely wide-eyed and shocked. He did, after a moment, his tongue flickering hotly and wetly against L's thumb.

Heat curled low in L's body, inexplicably, and it took him a moment to identify. Ah, he thought finally. Then, oh dear.

"You just," Light stammered when L pulled his thumb back. "You, you just -- I thought you said you weren't, you--"

"Hmm." L stared at his own thumb. Still, the evidence of his feelings was there to see. He rocked slightly, sending his roller chair forward and back. "Hmm."

"You, I can't believe you just--!"

Well, there was no denying it. Not precisely the most comfortable of things to feel for someone he was fairly certain was a mass murderer, but there was the evidence, right in front of his eyes.

"You pervert, Ryuuzaki! You just--"

L kissed his own thumb, tasting the faint hints of Light's mouth there. "You should feel honoured, perhaps," he said, thoughtful. "You'll be my first."

Light's mouth worked silently. "I'll -- in your sick fantasies, Ryuuzaki! I can't believe you'd--"

"You've been watching me in the same way I've been watching you," L pointed out. "It's all right, Light-kun. You don't have to confess to anything. If we both know, isn't that enough to act on?"

Light was silent. L nodded after a moment; in for a penny, in for a pound, as the old saying went. He reached up and snagged the front of Light's shirt, dragging him down. His lips met Light's teeth and blood was drawn; that was fine though, he thought, when Light's mouth began to move sluggishly on his.

"Good," L murmured, and kissed him again.

A half hour later, it was obvious Light was having second thoughts. He was sprawled over the roller chair, his chin resting against the back, knees tucked up on the seat. L pressed two fingers deeper into him; Light hissed, teeth gritting.

"Why am I in this position?" Light demanded in a hiss. "I thought you'd said I'd be your first."

"And you will," L said, encouragingly, thrusting his fingers. Light really looked rather nice, tucked up like that. "I have not done this before."

"-- oh hell --"

"I wouldn't worry, Light-kun," L said. "I know precisely what it is I should be doing. Don't move; I'll get a condom."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck--"

He returned a moment later, rolling the condom on firmly. "The package said they were strawberry-flavoured," L said, thoughtfully. "But I gave it a lick and it didn't taste very strawberry-like at all."

"You put that in your mouth?!"

"I believe, Light-kun, that is one of its many purposes," L said. He took hold of Light's hips. "Are you comfortable?"

"I've changed my mind," Light said. "I'm not comfortable sleeping with someone. Who. With. I don't even know your name, Ryuuzaki! What name am I supposed to scream, huh?"

L laughed, softly, and leaned over, nosing the back of Light's neck. He really did have a nice throat, L thought distantly. Very biteable "Of course you don't, Light-kun. You're the biggest suspect for being Kira. But you seem to have taken to 'Ryuuzaki'. If you're inclined to scream, feel free."

"Ryuuzaki! I don't think, I -- ow!"

Hesitating, L reached around, stroking Light's flagging erection. "Did that hurt?"

"Yes."

"Ah. My apologies, Light-kun. Lift your hips -- no, like this." L tugged Light's hips up slightly. "Perhaps the angle will be slightly better this way?"

Light bit the back of the chair. "Fucking hell, I hate you," he muttered. "Just stop, sto-- oh."

"Better, Light-kun?"

Light's next breath was ragged. "...fine," he muttered. "Whatever -- Ryuuzaki. The chair is rolling."

"...So it is," L agreed. "Here, let's move it over to the desk."

"That's not a good id--ah!"

L blinked. "Ah? Was that good, Light-kun?"

"Shut the fuck up," Light muttered. "And do that again."

L smiled a little to himself, pleased, and finished rolling the chair over. Bending over Light, he moved shallowly and quickly, mostly ignoring Light's explosions of profanity in favour of nibbling at the back of one exposed ear.

Light was the first one to come, gasping out a startled Ryuuzaki -- not a scream after all, L noticed -- and folding forward against the back of the chair again, a cheek pressed hard to its edge. He was breathing hard, and L thought he might be saying something under his breath. But it was far beyond his skills to understand those words right then, eyes closing, biting the inside of his cheek as he thrust a few more times and came.

He remained like that a little longer, resting his weight against Light's back, the balls of his feet pressing into the floor and his knees bent against the chair. And then he sighed, smiled faintly, and pulled out.

"Ow," Light muttered, sullenly. "Fuck."

"Mmm. We did, didn't we?" L pulled off the condom and held it between two fingers, looking at it almost thoughtfully before dropping it in the trash. "It was very nice, Light-kun. I wouldn't mind doing that again."

Light was almost asleep, despite his uncomfortable position. "Fuck off," he muttered.

"You aren't usually this profane," L noted, zipping his pants back up. "It's unusual. And perhaps a little cute."

"Cute? ...never mind. Just. Never mind." Light cracked one eye open. "...what the hell are you doing?"

L gave him a strange look as he lifted the plate. "Getting more cake, Light-kun. Are you feeling well? You normally notice that."

"...You're getting cake."

"I spent some energy, I think," L said thoughtfully. "I'm hungry. You spent some energy too, of course. Would you like some?"

Light grumbled under his breath. "No," he said sullenly. Then, "Fine. Sure. Yes, I'd like some cake."

L came over and looked down at him, then took a forkful of his own cake and held it out to Light.

Light scowled at him.

"Say 'ahh'," L said, and smiled faintly.