I <3 ZOMBIES
Friday, July 25, 2008
11:29AM - Meme Haiku (bless you!)
What do you do for a living?
Sit on my fat ass
Kids wreak havoc in household
Laundry never done
If you could be anywhere right now, where would that be?
Stimulate my brain
Immerse me in new knowledge
Some school far away.
What do you do for fun?
Read books when I can
Warcraft is a big time suck
Glass again, some day
What is your relationship status?
Married fifteen years.
Bumps and curves along the way....
Still love the dude, though.
What is your greatest fear?
Leave the world at last
Anonymously kick it
No impact at all.
Friday, July 18, 2008
2:59PM
Watching Maggie Gyllenhaal on "The Daily Show" - hooooly cow, she may PLAY smart, but I don't think the poor thing has three brain cells to knock together.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
3:02PM
According to The Big Read, the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books on their list.
Bold what you've read. Italicize what you intend to. I'm adding my own: strikethrough what you've tried AND FAILED to read.
( Read more... )
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
11:24AM - Kid shows.
I have done my parental duty by actually viewing a thing my child loves to see what my opinion is of the show from WATCHING it, and not just HEARING about it or READING about it, and I have come to the inescapable conclusion that "Hannah Montana" is a steaming pile of shit and Billy Ray Cyrus should have been sterilized.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
1:23PM - A meeeeeeeeeeeeme
1. Post 3 things you've done in your lifetime that you don't think anybody else on your friends list has done.
2. See if anybody else responds with "I've done that."
3. Have your friends cut & paste this into their journal to see what unique things they've done in their life.
1. Greeted Chick Corea in my own living room (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
hsleake has done this too, but I still think I can list it)
2. Had sex onstage at an outdoor amphitheater (it was around 3am)
3. Cross-stitched a "Die in a Fire" wall decoration
Monday, June 23, 2008
1:57PM
Pryor: heart attack.
Carlin: heart attack.
Pryor: set self on fire.
Carlin: heart attack.
Pryor: died slowly of MS.
Carlin: heart attack.
So I'm thinkin' Carlin won the Comedian Health Sweepstakes. Though they BOTH beat out Lenny Bruce, John Belushi, Mitch Hedberg, Phil Hartman, John Candy, Chris Farley, Richard Jeni, Gilda Radner, and Bill Hicks in the distance event.
10:06AM
Heard about Carlin around 1:30 this morning or so during my first bout of insomnia in months.
If there's an afterlife, hope you enjoy it.
If there's reincarnation, pick an entertaining family.
"Okay, Sheriff, we're gonna fuck you now.......but we're gonna fuck you SLOW."
Sunday, June 22, 2008
11:48AM - Mewzik
In any discussion of "over-rated rock bands," the following will ALWAYS be mentioned:
- The Beatles
- Led Zeppelin
- Rush
- Yes
- The Rolling Stones
- The Doors
- Bob Dylan
These lists - and these bands' consistent inclusion on them - remind me of the story of the high school kid who said he didn't like Shakespeare because it was "full of clichés."
Friday, June 20, 2008
12:08PM
Okay, I keep seeing that you should send a number or a code or whatever through your mobile phone to some 5-digit number. How do you dial a 5-digit number? Or is there some special thing you go through to dial that 5-digit number? Or do you have to be on a certain type of service?
11:43AM - Parlez-tikz
Hey, you rabid Hillary Clinton supporters out there who can't seem to stop bitching and whining - will you please do me the courtesy of telling me how the Obama campaign kneecapped her and "stole her delegates?" I know that my complete OBAMAMANIA is obvious because I'm even ASKING (actually, I was for Edwards) but I really just want to understand.
I'm also waiting for someone to explain to me how "Michigan and Florida had their delegates stripped for knowingly violating primary rules, so most candidates didn't campaign there because of those same rules" mutated into "Hilllary got the most votes in the obviously fair Michigan and Florida primaries and Barack wants to STEAL THEM!"
Also, cure for the common cold and magical flying pastel kitty-cats.
Friday, June 13, 2008
3:15PM - Burpdate, in html unordered list form
- lno is a loser.
- Moving. Still. Last load is coming from the old house to this one tonight. Don't know where the hell we're going to put it all.
- Tark's calling the mess in the workshop "100 day boxes" - open one a day for a hundred days, clean it out, then you're done.
- HOLY SHIT WE OWN WAY TOO MUCH STUFF WTF
- We've taken 6 or so trailer-loads of trash to the dump so far and I think we still have one left.
- When I was in middle school and high school I would tell friends, "When I win $1,000,000.00 I'll buy you a [house, car, pony]". I'd like to revise that up to ten million, because a million dollars just isn't as much as it used to be.
- Some weird little bug bit me on the space between my index and middle fingers and it itches like a MOTHERFUCK.
- End of line.
Friday, June 6, 2008
10:43PM
This is how the family's gonna look the day after tomorrow:
11:33AM - Ganked from Juniperus
You are in a mall when the zombies attack. You have:
1. one weapon.
2. one song blasting on the speakers.
3. one famous person to fight alongside you.
This is totally a minute-by-minute thing - my opinion will change as soon as I blink, so here's the very first thing I pictured:
It's night. The mall is in flames. I'm wielding a nail-studded mace. James Marsters as "Spike" is fighting beside me and blaring from the [+10] [eardrum rupture] speakers is "What It Takes" by Aerosmith.
I DON'T KNOW. I REALLY DON'T. BUT THAT'S WHAT I'VE GOT.
Thursday, June 5, 2008
8:50PM
TOTALLY shitty mock-up of the idea I had earlier behind the cut.
( Read more... )
11:55AM - Urpdate
What have I been up to? Guess! G'wan, guess. .....PACKING! And packing and packing and packing and I only need to more letters to make that paNIcking which is what I'm starting to do about all this PACKING.
I am not, however, packing fudge.
I have a great "MCCAIN 08" bumper sticker idea. Might have to mock it up in PAINT to make myself giggle.
I'm sure some math person can come up with the undoubtedly incredibly simple equation which will determine what movie is best to have on while packing. For instance, I know that anything involving brainmeats (Pi) is out. I know character-driven thought-provokers (American Beauty) are out. Without being able to pay attention to those types of movies, they're really bad background noise. Some of my favorites for this kind of project (laundry's another one) are The Day After Tomorrow, The Fifth Element, Independence Day... last night I added Bulletproof Monk to the list, though it sometimes sucks me in during the fight scenes. So maybe not great for this kind of project because hey - kung-fu movie, fight scenes, not a lot of working getting done there, if you see what I'm saying.
HEY guess who's procrastinating? Right now I'm watching - well, "right now" in this case means "during this bout of goddamned packing" - I'm going through From the Earth to the Moon. And it is good.
I think I'm hungry.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
9:58AM - Braintracks
This morning "Piss Up a Rope" has morphed into "Virus Alert" has morphed into "Time in a Bottle" has morphed into "Eulogy" has morphed into "It's My Life" has morphed into "A Little Piece Of My Heart."
Not unusual, just bugging me more than usual this morning.
(In order: Ween, Weird Al Yankovic, Jim Croce, Tool, Talk Talk, Janis Joplin)
Monday, June 2, 2008
11:56AM - Thaaaaangs.
- My left shoulder's gone a bit intermittantly wonky lately, and sometimes odd tingles run down my left arm like bits of it are falling asleep. Wtf.
- We've started moving furniture. I don't think it's going to be as deadly as I had feared.
- MY ARMPIT ITCHES, WTF?
- How did I spawn children so retarded that they can't throw away an empty cereal box?
Friday, May 30, 2008
7:05PM - Urrrrrgh.
Ever do a chore which made your face pull into an involuntary grimace through the whole thing because it was so gross?
Yeah - I just moved, and cleaned the floor under, the oven.
6:30PM - Polly Tics
McClellan is a snivelling toad who kept quiet to enjoy the power and prestige of his position and then spilled to make some money.
He is also a man who was caught up at the time, but has since taken the opportunity to reflect on what he participated in and decided to tell the truth.
Sometimes I am willing to give the benefit of the doubt. The conservative Republicans have been attacking the shit out of him as a traitor to their party, but they also haven't particularly refuted anything he wrote. On the SDMB, f'rinstance, the Bush people would be warned for attacking the poster instead of the post.
8:13AM
If I were to get into the real estate market now, I think I would buy a couple of rental properties. It seems to me that all of those people who have been foreclosed on will have to live SOMEwhere.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
3:23PM - This post NSFW
The fucking laser printer and its fucking toner and fucking paper loader can fucking kiss my fucking ass. Fucking stupid fucking obsolete fucking toxic pieces of fucking shit.
"What does PC LOAD LETTER even MEAN?!?!?!!"
1:55PM
"Tell Houston I'm well aware of the goddamned gimble!"
".......Roger that, Houston."
I love Apollo 13.
12:00PM
It's lip-bitingly fun to go back in time and watch Chris Makepeace break Matt Dillion's nose.
9:42AM - Feh!
Not Much Fun:
- Hand-washing denim
- Vacuuming carpet with a shop-vac
- RUNNING OUT OF FRESH COFFEE
- ETA: My period starting a motherfucking week early
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
12:44PM
I love that the Boston Legal writers seem to be fanboys of one kind or another. They got the word "klingon" into Shatner's mouth and they just had the line "you look pretty in pink" come out of Spader's. I understand that these are stupid little things which any child of the stupid 80s would pick up in a stupid heartbeat, BUT I STILL THINK IT'S COOL, DAMN YOU ALL AND YOUR ACCUSING EYES!
12:06PM
I've just realized that when I comment in people's journals, more often than not my comment is so very tangentially related to the post that it probably takes work to figure out why the fuck I bothered. So, you know, sorry for that if I do that to you and you're reading this. If I do that to you and you're NOT reading this, go fuck yourself! You don't matter! HA! HA!
Friday, May 23, 2008
9:24AM
MUST ... GET ... SMART ... ENOUGH ... TO ... TAKE ... PHYSICS ... CLASSES....
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