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Tuesday, July 24th, 2007
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8:57 am - per carolyn wright's request...
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memes usually suck. so i've here attempted to make one that doesn't suck so very much. maybe a little.
1) what moves you?
Beauty. (that's economy of words for you).
2) favorite vegetarian recipe? (please post here...unless of course, it's top secret).
nutritional yeast pasta.
fry onions and celery in smart balance or another vegan butter substitute. add handfulls of nutritional yeast until the the butter clumps. add enough water to make the sauce smooth. season with salt, pepper and parsely. serve over a pasta that can hold a lot of sauce. i find the best kind is wagon wheel pasta.
3) if you could go sailing with three, horny, naked individuals who found you windly attractive and would consent to just about anything, in a boat full of baby jesus butt plugs (http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php), chocolate body paint, liquid silk and rabbit vibrators (http://www.mypleasure.com/store/Vibrators/Waterproof-Jack-Rabbit.asp)...who would you bring along?
paul atreides, frida, will turner
4) favorite beverage?
margaritas right now.
5) can i get an amen for sardonic wit? (i guess that wasn't much of a yes or no question).
yes. seeing as i asked the question.
6) how do you deal with the coming apocalypse? what self-care stragies do you implement? (sardonic wit perhaps? other?)
farmwork. then lots of ice and advil.
7) hope...(good or bad? do you have it? do you not?)
i have it. but i don't make the mistake of believing it's more or less than what it is.
8) favorite bedtime story?
heckety peg, the weaving of a dream
9) how do you express yourself?
thinking, doing, making.
10) what does Beauty mean to you?
that which elicits tears. and i'm not talking about stab-wounds.
11) what was/is the greatest challenge you've faced?
loving myself.
12) what wisdom(s) do you have to offer the world?
love yourself. it is the first step to doing justice to others.
13) of what are you most proud?
loving myself.
14) favorite poem? (please post here...unless of course, it's the iliad or worse...the unabridged mahabarata).
ROMANCE DE LA LUNA, LUNA
A Conchita García Lorca
La luna vino a la fragua
con su polisón de nardos.
El niño la mira, mira.
El niño la está mirando.
En el aire conmovido
mueve la luna sus brazos
y enseña, lúbrica y pura,
sus senos de duro estaño.
Huye luna, luna, luna.
Si vinieran los gitanos,
harían con tu corazón
collares y anillos blancos.
Niño, déjame que baile.
Cuando vengan los gitanos,
te encontrarán sobre el yunque
con los ojillos cerrados.
Huye luna, luna, luna,
que ya siento sus caballos.
Niño, déjame, no pises
mi blancor almidonado.
El jinete se acercaba
tocando el tambor del llano.
Dentro de la fragua el niño,
tiene los ojos cerrados.
Por el olivar venían,
bronce y sueño, los gitanos.
Las cabezas levantadas
y los ojos entornados.
Cómo canta la zumaya,
¡ay, cómo canta en el árbol!
Por el cielo va la luna
con un niño de la mano.
Dentro de la fragua lloran,
dando gritos, los gitanos.
El aire la vela, vela.
El aire la está velando.
15) favorite vegetable?
swiss chard.
16) name five green things that bring you joy.
stinky kachula the goblin princess, fresh picked string beans, my new (FREE) futon, my one pair of lacy undies, the poetry of garcia lorca
17) five pink things that make you uneasy.
girliness, cotton candy, sunburns, the body exhibit, concentrated evil flowing underground (watch ghostbuster II)
18) five blue things that make you horny.
frida's house, the water of life, the eyes of the fremen, the sky at dusk, billie holiday's blues
19) five white things that depress you.
sterility, the white before my eyes in a fainting spell, white supremacy, pictures of mass graves in nazi concentration camps, cigarettes
20) do you still have your first stuffed animal? elaborate.
unfortunately no. i lost blupo at some point while moving out after spring clean up.
[21) what do you most need to heal/recover from?]
self-doubt.
22) what makes you feel the most vulnerable?
when people yell at me.
23) what aspect(s) of your being most often get(s) taken for the whole of your being by others?
depends on who's experiencing me. on the farm, my "smiley-ness." elsewhere, my feminism, "feistiness." really depends.
24) what is your Truth?
"not two."
25) can i get a hug?
why certainly. i needed to stretch after writing this anyway.
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| Tuesday, March 20th, 2007
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3:15 pm - memification.
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4 Things you may not have known about me....
1. with the exception of one pair, all of my jeans have a hole in the inner right thigh. i guess my luscious leg meat is just itching for freedom.
2. god talks to me in my dreams.
3. i find vibrators to be largely boring.
4. when i was 11 i participated in a study on the sleep-patterns of depressed kids. for three nights in a row i went to this lab and got sensors stuck all over my body and a monitor thing taped to my head. i wore a huge gauze hoody to try to hide my cranial bulge, but to no avail. after that i wore a wrist monitor for a week that recorded my activity level. all in all a traumatic experience not worth the minimal pay.
Four places I have worked:
1. massequality
2. metalwerx
3. bearhill farm
4. the women, gender and sexuality studies office
5. dormcrew...ha mofos. i tricked you.
Four places I have lived:
1. billerica, ma
2. billerica, ma
3. no. andover, ma (sort of...my dad had an appartment there)
4. lexington, ma
Four TV Shows I like to watch:
1. ugly betty
2. grey's
3. 30rock
4. old episodes of the simpsons
Four places I have been on vacation:
1. the blue ridge mountains
2. anchorage, AK
3. calabria, italy
4. lance-aux-meadows, newfoundland
Four of my favorite foods:
1. vegetarian burritos
2. spanakopita
3. avocado rolls
4. seaweed udon
Four places I would rather be right now:
1. i wouldn't rather be somewhere else. as i am expecting a phone call, i'm in my dorm room, sitting in the sunshine, delighting in the fact that i got plentiful sleep, sipping tea and relaxing by way of this soothing meme. nuthin like wasting an hour well.
Four friends I think will respond:
1. nobody will. and i don't care none.
And if I could do it all over again I would have:
1. put that $40 in my money clip and not my back pocket.
2. stayed with piano and viola.
3. taken art lessons in high school.
4. competed less with caitie as a kid.
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Monday, March 19th, 2007
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10:16 pm - bad ass update
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| Wednesday, January 31st, 2007
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5:32 pm - good for me
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| Sunday, January 7th, 2007
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11:17 am - maia walcott
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i had the most amazing dream last night.
i was a person named maia walcott. i had blonde, shoulder length, frizzy hair, and dressed like a dude. for the first part of my dream i was singing with the treble chorus of new england, marie stultz conducting. we were rehearsing in a church nursery with tiny chairs. marie stopped the rehearsal, turns to me, and asks "maia, are you wearing boys' pants?" i look flustered and say "no. these are flaired jeans." "ah," she replies. later on, she stops the rehearsal again and says "i smell fumes coming from a young man." she glares at me. i smell my armpit. "not me" i say. but then i decide it's time to peace out of the rehearsal. i'm followed by another chorister, who happens to be angelina jolie. she stops me in the hall and holds my upper arm. her eyes analyze my face. she utters a definitive "huh." we walk to the library, hide in the stacks. she asks me to explain my gender/sex to her.
"well, people see what they want to see in my face. i chose the name maia because it's easier for people to see a woman. but really, i'm not a man or a woman. i was born with a vagina, a uterus, testes and an itty bitty penis. so that makes me frickin awesome."
apparently angelina can empathize.
we're in love.
she takes me to a hidden room. in it there's a carved, wooden seat shaped like a naked goddess with open arms. the sitter sits on her bosom. the seat swivels in a circular motion, and it's held in place by an exoskeleton-type spherical frame.
"this seat will help us get pregnant."
we get naked. have fucking amazing sex. i sit in the chair, swivel around, and angelina's spermies penetrate my egg. then it's her turn. and wam bam. we're both pregnant!!!
cut to wal mart. i'm swinging by wal mart to pick up some snacks. except wal mart is more like "kwiky mart"...an all-in-one type corner store complete with laundromat in the front, a video section and aisles of junk food. i pop in and out, but an annoying little journalist spots me and gets nosey. "hey i've seen you hanging around angelina a lot. i've also heard she has a secret. sooooo...what's the deal huh?" i turn to the little crapper and ask "do you know angelina?" she seems confused. "what, personally? what do you mean 'know'?" i roll my eyes. "you don't know angelina. we have nothing to tell you. piss off."
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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| Saturday, January 6th, 2007
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11:16 am - "gwobul wapuh?"
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times they are a'changing. it's motherfuckin 70 degrees outside on the 6th of january...in massa-fuckin-chusetts. as any concerned citizen would do, i checked up on the status of my state and nation in the process of waking up to this human-made nightmare. i can't help but think about zigmund bauman's argument about bureaucracy. bureaucracy is the machine of genocide. bureaucracy, through microscopic division of labor, allows tremendous evil to be done because it doesn't feel like evil. it feels like pushing a button. or counting people boarding a train.
same can be said for global warming. it feels like getting from your house to the store...not warming the planet. however, we have to take this quality of bureaucracy and use it to save ourselves. divide up infinitessimal particles of good amongst billions.
my coping mechanism is hope. not denial. not griping to my hygienist about the "weird" weather. but terrified, optionless hope.
some things to be happy about: 1) BMW just came out with the first commercial hydrogen-powered car...to be made available in 2007. 2) the weather channel now has a sunday 5pm segment on global warming. that wasn't the case when i last checked up on them. global warming is in the news. it's a story. not a debate. 3) democrats are back in power (hopefully this means something). 4) YOU! you're not just sitting idly by...right? have you gone carbon neutral? have you bitched to everyone around you yet? if applicable, do your grandparents and nextdoor neighbors understand whats happening to our planet?
lastly, the "helpful hints" on all the global warming websites i check (stopglobalwarming.org, climatecrisis.net, davidsuzuki.org, weatherchannel.com) are getting longer and longer. step number one = doing all recommended shit. to all you college students out there, unplug all your appliances when you're not using them. turn down your heat. turn off lights when you leave...even for a minute. wash your clothes in cold water. take shorter, cooler showers. go vegetarian. work like a motherfucker to get green energy on your campus. do more shit than that.
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| Thursday, January 4th, 2007
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7:19 pm - why the eff not?
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1. Ever been offered an engagement ring?
um. not that i recall.
2. Longest friendship?
my twin. rachel or jennie would probably come in second.
3. Last gift you received?
cheese and onion bread from cori last night.
4. How many times have you dropped your cell?
ha. lost count. however, i did drop my second to last cell phone in the toilet. then i had to get my last cell phone. that one i gave up after the two year contract ended and i got the shit phone i have now.
5. When's the last time you worked out?
proper worked out? that would have to be three weeks ago.
i rode a bike with really flat tires to the post office two days ago. does that count?
6. Thing you spent a lot of money on?
christmas presents.
7. Last food you ate?
banana bread oatmeal.
8. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
how much they generally suck.
9. One favorite song?
currently, "talk to her" by priestess.
10. Where do you live?
i'm not telling you.
11. Cell phone service provider:
cing-gu-fuckin-lar. (that's hard to pronounce. what with the schwa at the end).
12. Favorite mall store:
brookstone. i go in there and sit on the massage chairs. they tickle me in special places.
13. Longest job ever had:
metalsmithing.
14. Do you own a pair of dice?:
what a dumb question.
15. Do you prank call people?:
no
16. Last wedding attended?
my dad and stepmother's.
17. First friend you'd call if you won the lottery:
jordanpooper.
18. Last time you attended church:
last sunday. caitie played the music. and she gave first parish uu church of chelmsford an unexpectedly professional treatsky.
19. How old are you?
98.
20. Biggest lie you have heard?
"i can't live without you."
21. What do you want to drive?
one of those carrot beasts the broccoloids ride in "power puff girls." that or a prius.
22. Where's your favorite place to eat with friends?
my house.
23. Can you cook?
"i flatter myself that such is the case."
24. What car do you drive?
my mom's or grammy's when i'm home...but i despise driving. so i try not to drive ever.
25. Favorite plant?
swiss chard. rinnius magnificus.
26. Last time you cried?
it's been too long. i choked up while watching "lady in the water," but that wasn't full out uncorking the tear ducts.
27. Most disliked food:
bell peppers. the only thing i can't tolerate.
28. Thing you like most about yourself?:
i like the way my brain works.
29. Thing you dislike most about yourself:
i have a tendency towards sadness.
30. Longest shift you have worked at a job?
16-18 hour days during reunion week last spring.
31. Favorite movie?
titus. the hours. crash. henry V. frida. stuff that's weird, true and heart-wrenchingly beautiful.
32. Can you sing?:
i can. i wish i could sing better. and i wish i had reason or occasion to sing these days.
33. Last concert?
kaki king. except grrrrrr...i only got to see 15 minutes of kaki because she was preceded by an unannounced warm up act. poop.
35. What color are your eyes?:
i believe the color is what they call "pale blue."
36. Who knows your darkest secret?
dunno. if i had something really "dark" tucked away inside, i'd feel so shitty about it i'd have to let the world know. ie, counterbalance my guilt with humiliation and forgiveness. i'm not much of a secretive person. my darkness osmotes.
37. Last movie rented?:
damn. haven't rented a movie in months. probably something gay.
38. Thing you never leave home without?:
my phone, money clip, chapstick.
40. Do you like Chinese food?
yeah. how can somebody like or dislike an entire type of cuisine?
42. Is your room clean?:
always.
43. Laptop or desktop computer?:
laptop when i have mine, but any will suffice. especially if it has pinball.
44. Favorite comedian?:
eddie izzard.
45. Do you smoke?:
nyope.
46. Sleep with or without clothes?
generally pajama pants or scrubs with a frumpy t-shirt. throw on a sweatshirt and i'm ready for breakfast.
47. Who sleeps with you every night?
tear.
48. Long distance relationships work?
they could. depends. as with all relationships.
49. How many times have you been pulled over by the police?
three.
50. Pancakes or french toast?
french toast.
51. Do you like coffee?
yeah but...i don't want to get hooked. so i avoid it unless circumstances are dire.
52. How do you like your eggs?
from a chicken. free range, organic.
53. Do you believe in astrology?
i believe the stars and i are linked in unfathomable ways. i don't believe in horoscopes.
54. Last person you talked to on the phone?:
sillybean.
55. Last person on your missed call list?
uhs. some person called me to reschedule an apt. with my psychiatrist.
56. What was the last text message you received?
message from kasey.
57. McDonalds or Burger King?
what the fuck is the "or" for? mcdonalds AND burger a) can suck my asshole and b) must die.
58. Number of pillows?:
3+
59. What are you wearing right now?:
ha. i'm dressed for deval patrick's inaugural ball. hence i am wearing a decent, though old black dress, the set of fake pearls zoe got me for christmas, some diachroic glass earrings, my peacoat and a scarf.
60. Pick a lyric, any lyric or song?
I won't shiver in the cold
I won't let the shadows take their toll
I won't cover my head in the dark And I won't forget you when we part
Collapse the Light Into Earth
I won't heal given time
I won't try to change your mind
I won't feel better in the cold light of day
But I wouldn't stop you if you wanted to stay
Collapse the Light Into Earth
61. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
honey. no jelly.
62. Can you play pool?:
never played.
63. Do you know how to swim?:
i don't sink.
64. Favorite ice cream?:
green tea.
65. Do you like maps?:
uh...they're good. actually yeah i do. i once had this talking globe thing. it taught me all the capitals. i guess that's not quite a map. but in principal, i like them. they supplement my frickin terrible sense of direction.
66. Tell me a random fact about yourself?:
for at least a fraction of a second, a potential person existed, who was neither me, nor my twin. then that person ceased to exist, and split into two persons. i am one of those two.
68. Ever attend a theme party?:
krunkmitzvah. queer jew themed party!
69. What is your favorite season?
winter. sad. so sad. winter i miss you. and to all you people who joined that fucking stupid facebook group "global warming ruined my fuckin winter" or whatever the shit it's called, directing your anger at global warming is futile and silly. go plant a tree goddammit.
70. Last time you laughed at something stupid?
i laughed at the first 20 minutes of "kung pow" with cody today. that's what i call a nostalgia sundae with a cherry on top.
71. What time did you wake up this morning?
10:30. though my grammy woke me up several times before that. i had mad weird dreams. dreamt i was in a play combining ancient greek myth and the lion king. i crawled around stage snarling, wearing a toga-type garment. i offered up a baby rhinoceros to be sacrificed. beats me.
72. Best thing about winter?
SNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
snow motherfucker.
and frosty windows.
and frosty grass.
and frozen ground.
and breath that freezes in the air.
and icicles.
and cold air in your nostrils.
and flushed cheeks.
and coming in from the cold.
and fires in the fireplace.
and hot hocolate.
and gender-neutral snow people.
and peacoats.
and scarves.
and layers.
and mittens.
and boots.
and snow forts.
tear.
73. Last time a cop gave you a ticket?
nevah!!!!!!!! ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
74. What's the scariest thing you've ever done?
got into a carcrash. thought my muffins and i were going to die.
76. Do you think pirates are cool or overrated?
i once dressed up as a pirate for a pirate-themed UU con. however this pirate craze has gotten out of control.
77. What are you doing this weekend?
hosting a dinner party. going back to campus.
78. Who's your best friend?
twin, jordan, sam, cori, stinker.
79. What is the third letter of your name?:
q.
80. How old are your pets?:
aditi is 9. gizmo is...wow...i have no idea...i'm thinking 5. shit. dunno. pippsy is 4.
81. What color is your backpack?
pink, blue, green, purple. probably some other colors.
82. Are you sick?
in the head. in a good way.
84. Is the bathroom open?:
i spose.
87. Are you smiling?:
no grimacing. at this stupid meme i feel compelled to finish.
88. Do you have on eyeliner?:
no.
89. Do you miss someone right now?
sure. always.
90. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?
a snowy bilerica.
91. Do you have a Myspace?
yeah but...not really.
92. Are you in high school?:
oh. that's why this meme sucks donkey schlong. a way-immature high schooler made it up.
93. Do you have a crush?:
god no.
94. What is your favorite nickname for yourself?:
rinny. but only if i preapprove the users of it.
95. What color is your bathing suit?:
green. haven't yet worn it swimming though.
96. What's your favorite brand of water?:
water from the farm tap.
97. Did you go on vacation last month?
that's a definite no. but i have been lazing around the house with a high degree of success.
98. Have you ever been on a cruise?:
no. my mom's going though!
99. Do you have a sister?:
dos.
100. Are you upstairs?:
THAT is question 100?
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| Tuesday, January 2nd, 2007
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11:54 pm - "your words are very beautiful. your heart is very big."
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i climbed out of bed to share this thought with you.
after watching "lady in the water" my mom asks "so what's it about?" i scoff, barely audibly, but only because i couldn't come up with an elegant enough answer for the moment. amongst others, possible answers included "showcasing m. night shyamalan's knowledge of plot, cinema and representation," and "a call for justice, hope, goodness and purity that comes from within and without. meaning that is essential and bigger than any one person or thing. meaning that is inescapable and inviolable."
but when i was laying down to rest my head i thought of something else...which is a thought i wanted to hold.
we weave our own meanings and these meanings are truth. this is culture as well as our personal musings. truth with life or death consequences. the Beauty of meaning lies in the believing and creation of that meaning...the STANDING within it. when we enter our stories wholly, unafraid, that is Beauty. there is no beginning or ending, no source AND THAT is truth.
i used to think of Beauty as something channeled, but now i think of it in terms of hermeneutics, relationships.
Beauty is conceived.
Beauty is created and lived and experienced and felt.
Beauty is the convergence of an infinite number of possibilities.
and to be in that space is truth.
that's what cleveland feels when he holds story in his arms and tells her exactly what he needs to say. he could have said other things. and they would have been Beautiful too. it was Beautiful. and i know this because i was moved.
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| Saturday, December 30th, 2006
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5:53 pm - the year in review...concisely.
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| Thursday, December 28th, 2006
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4:21 pm - i love ideas
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i love ideas.
i love ideas.
i love making up words.
i love impossibility.
i love eternally hinting and reaching and straining to touch.
i love the painfully asymptotic nature of epistemologies.
tell me tell me tell me how i'm WRONG! because i know!
let's talk forever. and question and complicate and mix.
let's make tools together. ways of seeing the world. then drown them in complexity.
the ideas are beautiful and delicate.
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(6 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, December 22nd, 2006
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4:42 pm - ORGASM TODAY!
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| Tuesday, November 21st, 2006
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12:46 am - POST PEOPLE!!! POOOOOOOST!
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| Sunday, November 5th, 2006
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6:16 pm - a more hopeful conclusion to my last post...
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life in my head is too noisy.
there's too much meaning.
my dad wants me to come watch him coach a girls' soccer game in wellesley, and i end up busting out my notebook and doing a goffmanian performance analysis of his negotiation of the fronts "parent" and "coach." why? because it matters.
i start thinking of the devices he uses to build up his authority as "coach," a front particularly undermined by my own presence and the presence of his stepdaughters.
then i start thinking of dad's particular idiosyncracies that would lend him to want to perform "coach" loudly even without my presence.
then i start thinking about all the ceremony necessary to keep fronts from running into each other...and what happens when two fronts clash, and AREN'T rigidly managed...
then i start thinking how ALL fronts are inherently unstable, running into each other, undermined, in a state of collapse and that's why the ceremony is both necessary and always failing...
then i start thinking how the only true way to do a person justice would be to understand that person's tectonic performative existence...to understand the fault lines, the movements, the importance of each performance and its interactions with the other fronts this person performs...because such fronts hint at, but can never equal, an underlying self. i buy this.
then i start thinking how freakin' everything is connected.
then i start thinking "shit! there's too much meaning in the world."
and then i think "wait. no. there's too much meaning in my own damn head."
but i love meaning.
that's what "it" is about, right?
justice.
impossibility.
feelings.
symbols.
there are reasons why i feel pain, pleasure, joy.
there are reasons for pride and confidence.
there are reasons why justice is justice and impossible.
i think too much i know, but that's how i like it...leaping headfirst into the blackhole of impossible justice.
what else am i going to do?
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(comment on this)
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| Friday, November 3rd, 2006
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7:38 pm - i have a headache.
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some realizations about myself:
i like pure, obvious, simple things.
things with a right way, and a wrong way.
even spectrums of right and wrong.
even fractal-like puzzles of right and wrong slipping in and out of each other.
i like shiny shower fixtures. either they're shiny, or they're not.
i like bunches of swiss chard. either they're crunchy, spotless, fanned-out, weighty and snipped at the bottom...or they're not.
this is not to say that i don't revel in complexity.
i do...
just so long as it leads to right
or
wrong.
i study WGS so one wond'rous morn i can wake up and finally understand how to be in the world and treat everyone as they deserve.
once i've read enough theory, heard enough stories, hit bedrock in this mountain of pain that is human existence. once i've lived enough, fucked up enough, had enough conflict, talked to enough people, treated enough people well and badly...then finally...finally...i can be okay.
the problem is...there are only wrongs.
no rights.
every right is flawed and fucked up in its own way.
there's no "right" hiding in the margins of fanon or foucault or lorde or jesus or thich nhat hanh.
my brain is short-circuiting.
i always knew i was flawed, fucked up. and i always knew everyone else was too. but somehow, it escaped me that there can't be purely good actions. rare as they are. somehow, i always thought there was a "right way" to act in a given situation. once all the particulars were taken into account, every detail laid out. you know, "what would jesus do?" well i'm not jesus...but was it really all that cool when he flipped over tables in the temple and drove the money changers out? why does that get to be pure "goodness?" i would have been scared out of my goddamn mind if i saw jesus acting like that in the marketplace. he could have hurt somebody.
anyway...i want to stamp out this horribleness in me. i can't breathe without hurting...others.
and i wish, how i fucking wish, that i could find a point beyond "doing what i think is right" like for example, "what i want" or "who i want" or even take on a task that someone i care about TELLS me is worthwhile...
but there is nothing beyond this need to justify my own existence.
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| Sunday, October 15th, 2006
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8:35 pm - no one's done my meme yet...so I'M doing my meme
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1) Sit up straight.
done. neck stretched. back cracked.
2) Inhale slowly.
3) Exhale slowly.
4) Inhale slowly.
5) Exhale slowly.
6) Think about your day.
7) How were you brilliant today? (And no you can't get out of answering this question).
i finally fixed my glasses. i gave jordan a hug. i made bitter orange-aide out of sugachi oranges.
8) What was the most delicious numnum you consumed? Describe in full.
seasoned laver.
i ripped open the baggy encasing the 1 1/2 inch thick plastic container of succulent, crispy seaweed. the laver was shiny, oily, dark green and flaky, in sheets of rectangular shape approximately palm-size. with each crunchy bite, the edges of the sheet would melt, salty morsels would dissolve on my tongue and stick to the corners of my mouth. the saltiness saturated my tastebuds, and relieved a deep longing for sodium brought on by the previous night's indulgences. though i told myself "no" you can't make it through 1 1/2 inches of bubbly gleaming laver, i most certainly did.
9) What was today's most sensorially rich experience? Describe in full.
mixing epoxy in a public park behind noa's house, surrounded by beautiful women. pungent odor, gluey fingers, smiles, glasses, laughter, a barricade and bubbles.
10) How did you feel when you woke up? What were you thinking about?
i was sad and pissed. i was listening to "kissed by a rose" in my head, having missed the song at the 90s dance.
11) How do you feel now? Why?
down. anxieties RE: hpag. aribtrary hormonal biz.
12) Where are you?
my quarters in the bordello.
13) Where do you wish you were? (Could be where you are).
taking in the warmth of a slowly burning fire.
14) Who needs a phonecall from you?
my little sister.
15) Call that person. Yes. Now. The computer won't go anywhere.
16) Did you call hir? Why/why not?
yup. cuz i had to tell her she was Beautiful.
17) What's vexing you?
hpag. vague bullshit having to do with how i'll be spending my summers and my life.
18) How can you process that anxiety?
in the first case, do what i know needs to get done in as organized a fashion as possible. in the second, look into study abroad opportunities and actually think about what i want.
19) How will you indulge before the day is through?
hopefully i'll get to give jordanimus another hug.
20) What would Jesus do if he were you right now?
spread the Beauty word.
21) What would Buddha do?
spread the Beauty word.
22) What would Frida do?
spread the Beauty word.
23) What would YOU do if you were to get up from your current position at the computer and go do something awesome, yet feasible? (Feasible is key here).
eat some more seasoned laver.
24) Execute your answer to question 20, 21, 22 or 23.
25) Did you do it? If not, why the hell not?
yep. did 20-22 and will probably do 23 soon enough.
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| Wednesday, October 11th, 2006
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5:17 pm - Meme, the second
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1) Sit up straight.
2) Inhale slowly.
3) Exhale slowly.
4) Inhale slowly.
5) Exhale slowly.
6) Think about your day.
7) How were you brilliant today? (And no you can't get out of answering this question).
8) What was the most delicious numnum you consumed? Describe in full.
9) What was today's most sensorially rich experience? Describe in full.
10) How did you feel when you woke up? What were you thinking about?
11) How do you feel now? Why?
12) Where are you?
13) Where do you wish you were? (Could be where you are).
14) Who needs a phonecall from you?
15) Call that person. Yes. Now. The computer won't go anywhere.
16) Did you call hir? Why/why not?
17) What's vexing you?
18) How can you process that anxiety?
19) How will you indulge before the day is through?
20) What would Jesus do if he were you right now?
21) What would Buddha do?
22) What would Frida do?
23) What would YOU do if you were to get up from your current position at the computer and go do something awesome, yet feasible? (Feasible is key here).
24) Execute your answer to question 20, 21, 22 or 23.
25) Did you do it? If not, why the hell not?
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, September 25th, 2006
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1:59 pm - where i live
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| Sunday, September 24th, 2006
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1:18 pm - dear all
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| Thursday, September 21st, 2006
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4:36 pm - i made a MEME!
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memes usually suck. so i've here attempted to make one that doesn't suck so very much. maybe a little.
1) what moves you?
2) favorite vegetarian recipe? (please post here...unless of course, it's top secret).
3) if you could go sailing with three, horny, naked individuals who found you windly attractive and would consent to just about anything, in a boat full of baby jesus butt plugs (http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php), chocolate body paint, liquid silk and rabbit vibrators (http://www.mypleasure.com/store/Vibrators/Waterproof-Jack-Rabbit.asp)...who would you bring along?
4) favorite beverage?
5) can i get an amen for sardonic wit? (i guess that wasn't much of a yes or no question).
6) how do you deal with the coming apocalypse? what self-care stragies do you implement? (sardonic wit perhaps? other?)
7) hope...(good or bad? do you have it? do you not?)
8) favorite bedtime story?
9) how do you express yourself?
10) what does Beauty mean to you?
11) what was/is the greatest challenge you've faced?
12) what wisdom(s) do you have to offer the world?
13) of what are you most proud?
14) favorite poem? (please post here...unless of course, it's the iliad or worse...the unabridged mahabarata).
15) favorite vegetable?
16) name five green things that bring you joy.
17) five pink things that make you uneasy.
18) five blue things that make you horny.
19) five white things that depress you.
20) do you still have your first stuffed animal? elaborate.
[21) what do you most need to heal/recover from?]
22) what makes you feel the most vulnerable?
23) what aspect(s) of your being most often get(s) taken for the whole of your being by others?
24) what is your Truth?
25) can i get a hug?
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3:23 pm - it's a doughy one...
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hello. i am happy. jubilant. fucking excited as all hell to be living and doing what i'm doing. hallelujah!
here's why (as always in no particular order):
1) it's fall...REALLY fall.
2) i'm wearing a comfortable and stylish hoody featuring my colors: navy and chocolate.
3) i'm living with jordanimus muffincito christopher craphead ford and sophie bess besl, one of the reigning queen bee lesbians of harvard. i
experience physical pleasure vicariously through her ever-expanding neck hickies.
4) i am taking three awe-inspiring WGS classes this semester:
WOMGEN 1001:
Studies of Women, Gender, and Sexuality 1001. Feminist Theory: Postcolonial Perspectives
Catalog Number: 5590 Enrollment: Limited to 15.
Gayatri Gopinath (University of California, Davis)
Half course (fall term). W., 1-3. EXAM GROUP: 6, 7
This seminar explores the ways in which postcolonial feminist criticism has theorized gender and sexuality. We pay particular attention to the development of the field as it has emerged both in the global South (particularly South Asia) as well as in Europe and North America. In so doing we examine the interface and points of connection between postcolonial feminist thought and U.S. women of color feminisms, queer studies, and diaspora studies.
WOMGEN 1133:
Studies of Women, Gender, and Sexuality 1133. Gender and Performance (New Course)
Catalog Number: 8829
Robin M. Bernstein
Half course (fall term). M., W., 3-4:30 and a one hour section to be arranged.. EXAM GROUP: 8, 9
Introduction to performance studies as it intersects with gender studies. What does it mean to say that gender is "performed?" How does performance--on- and off-stage--construct and deconstruct power with regard to gender, sexuality, race? We examine gender as a performance, feminist and queer theatre, normative and transgressive performances of gender in everyday life, drag, and gendered performance as a building block in racial and national identities. Topics include weddings, camp, butch-femme culture, Teddy Roosevelt.
WOMGEN 1402:
Studies of Women, Gender, and Sexuality 1402. Body Sculpting in Modern America (New Course)
Catalog Number: 4685 Enrollment: Limited to 15.
Karen P. Flood
Half course (fall term). Th., 1-3. EXAM GROUP: 15, 16
The last century has witnessed a proliferation of procedures and products to alter or "sculpt" one's body. This course analyzes this phenomenon by focusing on fitness movements and body-building, dieting and eating disorders, surgical interventions, and surface alterations such as tattooing in late nineteenth and twentieth-century America. We will explore the ideas of self-making contained in these practices, and we will examine the race and gender politics of these bodily modifications in different eras.
the first class, WOMGEN 1001, i've technically already taken, but the glorious gayatri gopinath has willed that i shall take it as an independent study. oh hotness. oh joy! fuck. yes. taking a class with gayatri is as robin bernstein says, "a once in a lifetime opportunity."
the other two classes speak for themselves. robin is my treasure. i worked in her office muchly last semester, helping her to assemble her haraway-inspired/cyborgian external brain (aka...her 100+ page bibliography of research sources). also did some editing for her. like for example, editing an unpublished cherríe moraga essay dealing with frida kahlo amongst other things...oh my stars. my stars my stars.
5) i can clean bathrooms for pay whenever the shit i want!
6) HPAG is going to take off like a fatherfucker this semester. you bet your heiny. just WATCH!
7) the first worship of the year for the HCUUs was last night...and it ruled basically. we read a bedtime story, "the dream child" by david mcphail specifically, and envisioned/visually manifested that image we would like to bring into our dreamspace, between awakeness and sleep. then we had tea. TEA!!! also, diane elliot is a beautiful individual. she's replacing mara dowdall who was our church-affiliated advisor.
8) i love SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many people here. i love them. love. last year i didn't have the emotional resouces to work on my relationships...or even nuture myself. since then, i've found a medication that works for me. i've seen my sister make an impressive, dramatic transformation. i've worked in the sun. felt exhilirated. i've become a vegetarian!!! eating protein does wonders i tell ye. now i can GIVE of myself. and i have been.
9) i live in the quad.
10) looking at my syllabi/doing WGS reading makes me tingle in a sexual way.
11) i have beautiful plants (or soon-to-be beautiful plants), a rug, two handsome chairs (thanks to jordanimus) and a hell of a lot of drawers in my room.
12) caitie's doing well and loving oberlin.
13) i had a good conversation with my dad the other day.
14) my grammy is Lord and saviour.
15) i've been taking TONS of naps.
16) i'm a pretty lovable, nifty person after all. and i'm not ashamed to be me. my WGS professors seem to llike me.
17) the harvard women's center is opening in 43 minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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