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Sep. 7th, 2005 @ 09:23 am ALMOST
Current Mood: crushed
Current Music: Foolish games
"only a fool breaks his own heart"

HEH! I heard this lyric from one of my bro's RnB and Soul CD collection, which he plays in the car every morning (keeps him awake he said). HA! with all those trumpets and drum beats we can have a "disco" there and then. But anyway, there are BLUEs songs in there too. Most of them I can so relate I almost even cried when I heard this other song of a man asking how and what should he do to break it gently to the girl he loves. As the song progresses, you realized he has a wife ie he's having an affair.

OH guys.. I could only shake my head in disgust and disappointment. HOW COULD YOU DO THAT! I asked in my thoughts. But his voice is so achingly, heartbreaking... (wow! sounds like an "idol judge" comment!)

One thing I learned that makes guys sooo depressingly annoying is their endless contradictions with regards to their actions, words and thoughts. I bet if he learns to support what he says with his actions, the world of hearts will be a better place. OF COURSE.. there will always be exemptions. And it aint as easy as do-re-mi.

GOING BACK! I now re-elect myself as an Official "fool", causing my own heartbreak. But compared to previous weeks, I ain't doing that bad. Just like the famous quote of Jennifer Aniston, we could be lonely, upset, confused but we could also be doing well.

It is soo much easier to relate to other people's unhappiness. And sometimes I wonder at night, just when my eyelids become heavy, how can 3 months be utterly significant. I would literally be scared out of my wits and wake up again.. maybe I'm not meant to fall in love. It's too harsh, too heartbreaking. I thought with him I am safe, and secured. Instead I find myself disbelieving him. Was it even real?!

There is a tinsy winsy voice in my head that sometimes would urge me to succumb and bend my pride once more. But what for? to be vulnerable again at the thoughtless words he would throw at me?!

I cant.

I have to remind myself every waking hour, everytime i look away from the computer to relax my eyes, everytime i see an industry labelled shirt, a kathmandu bag, smell giorgio armani, pass the corners where we sat, glance at my photo album, walk to skycity, wait for my bus, walk along Fitzwater Place and finally when I couldnt sleep at night when the moon is so bright ----- remind that he just isnt at the same place where I left him. He's been gone a long time ago.... maybe even more than three months.

He told me once that it was not him who looked me in the eye and walk another direction... (this was actually me)

But... he just isnt there anymore. I cannot sense him. "where is your heart" by Kelly Clarkson best describes this.

He didnt even give us another chance. How can he let me go so easily?!

I dont know. So many questions, but I guess 3 months is really nothing, and even if I seek to find answers I most likely wont get any. I could only hope for the truth to come out. It will set us free right?!

It's only 3 months... no big deal. move on, take charge.
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Aug. 22nd, 2005 @ 08:53 am words to ponder
Current Mood: crazy


1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks'trus) adj.
Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub tap on
and off with your toes.

2. CARPERPETUATION (kar'pur pet u a shun) n.
The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string
or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching
over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it
back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the
piece of confection (lollipop or gum) you dropped
on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will
somehow "remove" all the germs.

4. ELBONICS (el bon'iks) n. The actions of two
people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie
theater.

5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that
refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps
backing a person across the room, until he finally
decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay'
shun) n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a
milk container so badly that one has to resort to
the "illegal" side.

7. PEPPIER (peph ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy
restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be
walking around, asking diners if they want fresh
ground pepper.

8. PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of
dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you
are calling just as he or she answers.

9. PUPKUS (pup'kus) n. The moist residue left on
a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun)
n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least
twice before you pick it up, even when you're only
six inches away.

11. ORCHIDOPODY (or ki do po dy') act of hitting
a man in the testis

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Aug. 19th, 2005 @ 09:45 am i bruised easily
Current Mood: amused
Hindi naman ako "lampa" na maya't maya na lang eh sumusubsob sa semento, damuhan, batuhan o sa ibang tao. Meron lang talagang tendency na matapilok from time to time. Minsan hindi pa tapilok, kung di I would slide sideways on my own shoes.. MWEH! Nothing major, no bruises, no sprained muscles. Mapapansin mo lang.. (that is if you look close enough), na yung harapan ng kahit na anong closed shoes ko eh either madumi o natutuklap na ang upper lining.

Di ko rin mawari... pero okay lang naman ang natatapilok. Nakakahiya nga lang talaga minsan. Gives me a reason to smile, though. Lalo na pag alam kong.. "anytime now matatapilok ako". TAMA ba naman i psyche ang sariling "downfall". haha!

So to all those who wear those "fuck-me" shoes in University (stiletto heels) I ADMIRE your skills! :-D
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Aug. 15th, 2005 @ 06:39 pm losing someone
Current Mood: indescribable
Imagine losing a/an..

classmate/bestfriend/brother/lover/entertainer/clown/supporter/fan/psychologist/inspiration/door-opener/eye-opener/extra-hand/warmth/comfort/motivational-speaker/hair-stylist/fashion critic/a-life-size-stuffed-toy/warm-embrace/sweet-caress/a-glowing-face/conversationalist/teacher/favourite-/company/university-guide/chocolate-factory/change-machine/book-finder/hell-of-a-teaser/sports-announcer/movie-reviewer/christian-believer/poet/cynic/manual-car driver/compassionate-look/curiosity-driven-intellect/quotable quotes quot-er/pragmatist/realist/-biotechnologist-in-the-making/whispering hope/comfort zone/special bond/reason to smile////

Devastating?! Like the world is a totally different place



Now..



Imagine losing ONE person who is all these (to you)...







.... what now?!<=font>
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Aug. 12th, 2005 @ 08:41 am carry me higher
Current Mood: bouncy
Current Music: I'm a Bomb (Natasha Bedingfield)
YES I AM BACK!! rejoice rejoice!!

The sun's shining with a drizzle of rain.. the day can't even be more promising. I miss this..

So what's NEW?!

1) 31 JAN 2005 (Auckland Anniversary Day) Me and Honda (pet name for... :D---- well read on cause there's the clue!) FINALLY happened. The impression was.. "It was a sweet revelation. At first I thought nothing has prepared me for it.. but little did I know the universe has been constantly working on it.."

2) 05 - 13 FEB 2005 "a rollercoaster ride of a holiday." Australia Trip
>approximately 400 digital photos taken
>10 short video clips
>bacon, bacon and BACON every morning
>night swimming
>Type A rides at dreamworld
>spongebob hunt
>TEMPTing shops
>'rufus' the koala-like cat
>3-minute walk to the beach

3) 26 FEB 2005 "who said perfect setting only happens when hollywood couples kiss"?!?!

4) 04 MAR 2005 "I GOT IN!" Audition day. I am currently one of the pioneers of the JAZZ, SOUL & GOSPEL ensemble of Auckland University

5) 03 APRIL 2005 "There's a camera-man" --Eucharistic Convention at Auckland Showground. Amazing, Amazing.. :-)

6) 26 APRIL - 12 May "foreboding atmosphere"

7) 13 MAY "They dont emphasise 'Friday the 13th' for nothing..."
Recreation centre
Girl: what am i to you?
Boy: hmm.. I dont think we're in a relationship..

8) 10 JUNE "Microbiology exam.. in your faCE!" (got a B+) :D

9) 10 JUNE "happy birthday REAN"

10) 11 JUNE "happy 21st birthday LESLIE"

11) 28 JUNE "lost count of the hugs, but how tighter it becomes.. my heart begins to tug"

Boy: since when did you plan this?
Girl: even before we broke up.
Boy: aww.. (hugs girl) it must be hard.
Girl: .. (closed her eyes and savour the hug)

12) 8 JULY (i think!) DANIEL's 21st party... "aww.. his friends and family's testimony for him made ME cry"

NOTE to self: suddenly become homesick after seeing Daniel's photos from malaysia.. *sigh*

13) 15 JULY "lilac, purple, violet... WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE???!?!"
on decorating the Hobsonville Inn for Emily's 21st celebration.
"A helium-filled experience!"

14) 18 JULY - Present "a familiar place yet, I suddenly feel indifferent to it."
UNIVERSITY starts
my last semester has begun.



PHEw!!! Those are just from memory and previous text messages in my phone.

It's good to be back... hmmm Im thinking of changing my blog site... any suggestions?!?!<=font>
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Aug. 12th, 2005 @ 08:27 am ship wrecked
Current Mood: okay
Current Music: I wish you knew.. (mariah carey)
EXTRA EXTRA!

I have been resuscitated from my dormancy but solely out of the necessity to regain self-consciousness. Though not fully, I slowly gather strength to let go of the flotsams that I was left with. However, I held on to the last remaining part of the ship that will keep me afloat, and I have my name carved on it. The sweet thunderous ordeal must have left me with perhaps almost nothing.. at times delirious, but I have me. It is only a matter of time.. help will soon arrive.
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Jan. 28th, 2005 @ 05:01 pm JUMP MY DEAR!
Current Mood: indifferent
Current Music: What a difference a day makes
The last time i chatted with elaine i told her of my three fears . These werent one year old baggages.. but it's been ongoing ever since the time i decided to keep a journal.

At the start of this year though.. I have decided to take hold of my life (is it part of being TWENTY?) To not be at the backseat anymore. More or less i have come to know that i have a sense of control in some aspects of my existence. I could possibly change the gear, whether slow paced or go into the fast lane. I could even clean the front window so i can see clearly what's ahead of me and not focus on the rear view mirror, always looking back in the past. And that life presents us with a thousand of opportunities it is up to us whether we recognise this and eventually what we chose to do about it.

Happily two of my fears have been dealt with. What a relief. All i could do now is ... NOTHING. For the first time i dont have to be the one waiting and assuming. In a way.. it's not up to ME anymore. I have made a decision and had carried it and really... there's NOTHING for me to do but pray and hope for the best. :-)

JUMP MY DEAR says jojie, pertaining to my other dilemma. WE'll see jie.. we'll see. AS for now.. id just savour every moment with him. Thank you! :-D
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Dec. 7th, 2004 @ 11:29 pm the perfect song
Current Mood: enthralled
Current Music: Look of Love by Diana Krall
It's amazing how upon listening to a song can suddenly enlightened and stunned you at the same time. Music never fails me. Just when you thought no one seems to understand what you're going through, along came a composer/singer who put into words the very story of that particular aspect of your life. Maybe that is the reason why some people resolve into listening to the radio or their CD collection as a divergence, or as a way ease tension.. or to RELEASE the frustration.

Music never fails. Imagine how many genre of music you've heard so far in your life years. It's everywhere. It overlaps each generation interconnecting it.. and even outlast it.

~~~~

I just finished watching Diana Krall Live in Paris DVD, which my boss Damien happily lent to me. His famous words were "Im sure you'd love it, you will even want to buy one for you".. AND of course just as he was right regarding baking as "easy peasy", he was DEAD RIGHT this time too!! I LLLLOOOVEEEEEEEE it!!! I lover her deep, husky voice. It was so mesmerizing.. and my golly you should see her play the piano.. seems like she's got an extra hand! Not to mention her band were wonderful too! Wow.. I was dumbfounded ..

Here's the song that struck me the most.. and which rings the EXAct truth in my ear.. in my mind.. my heart.. even deep into my dreams.

Maybe You'll Be THere

Each time I see a crowd of people
Just like a fool I stop and stare
It's really not the proper thing to do
But maybe you'll be there
I do out walking after midnight
Along the lonely thoroughfare
It's not the time or place
To look for you
But maybe you'll be there
You said your arms would hold me
You said your lips were mine alone to kiss
Now after all those things you told me
How can it end like this
Someday if all my prayers are answered
I'll hear footstep on the stair
With anxious heart
I'll hurry to the door
And maybe you'll
Be there...
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Dec. 4th, 2004 @ 07:05 pm love is NOT in the air..
Current Mood: calm

No my dear siopao-ly.. love is NOT in the air.. it's more of an aroma of freshly baked muffins, and the occasional hint of irish coffee essence! Yep still standing and baking, been three weeks now aye?! I checked my bank account this afternoon and I couldnt believe i have THAT much. AAhh.. it's really great when you know you've earned that money by yourself. I was thinking of going to the cinema after work and coincidentally bridget jones would be showing in 15 minutes. I had this urge to just sit there and watch.. even if i was alone. haha! LONER! (i so want to watch a movie alone.. dunno why.. i just want to try it out).. but apparently I am not meant to.. at least fate is stopping me to (i remember i had this urge too. but i ended up seeing elaine and michelle so they came with me to watch.. ugh! cant even remember the film!). Going back.. I bumped into ate pam and ate K on the way up.. a lil bit of chit chat and they're gone.. but they were heading to the movie house (no they werent gonna watch a movie.. they're going to the parking lot).. ugh! so i thought better of it. To compensate for that i just bought me a "pavarotti" pie (astig sa pangalan ng pie! pang singer talaga noh?! hahahahahahah!!!) from jesters (yES kain na naman! yum yum) and then headed home.

Charmed was on tv.. and i watched it for thirty minutes and got reminded why I stopped watching it.. "prue" isnt there anymore.. hmm what's the actress' real name?! ahh.. Shannen Doherty.. right? She's far more better than those three combined lol!

I just came home from choir practice. It's sunday tom and our choir was invited to sing at the mass for the immaculate conception (celebration?!). eekk kakanta na naman tayo :D *excited & *nervous. :D Meron nga ring dinner at 7.30pm ang staff ng muffin break .. dunno if i can make it though.

*hayyy... kakapagod mag bake!! yun lang ang masasabi ko. :-P sige ima doze off again.. maaga pa bukas (no not because of work..). There's gonna be a procession at 9am so we have to be there around 8.30 because the roads will be closed. Siomai.. sandamakmak na tao na naman.. aww.. parang "sinulog" nung jan 18... *smiles warmly

one time ill post that entry of mine describing the "sinulog" experience. As for now... tulog muna.
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Nov. 30th, 2004 @ 10:28 pm amazed
Current Mood: ditzy
Current Music: a Little fall of Rain

Unexpectedly or should i say "unintentionally" Raymond clicked on my blog site which i posted as a status in my YM. Very unusual, I mean no offense but knowing him I wouldnt hve thought he'd browse through it.. (eh teka.. by accident naman eh! diba?). Anyway.. he said he really liked one of my entries here which he thought was in a poetry format.. PERO indi pala! hehe!

He then reminded me of this site where I used to post my poems. I have honestly forgotten about its existence not until he told me. HA! So I went to the site.. but unfortunately I couldnt get to my page.. hmm.. it's been that long ago.. dunno if it's still available.

*smiles* it's just nice to know that he still remember stuffs. hehe even if i try to forget.. especially those poems.. ang corny kasi if I read it now! But ironically I cant deny that those poems really, really..mean a lot to me.

So anyway.. for Kuya Budoy *wink* and to all those who's just curious here's the address:

www.poetry.com

search for my name :D
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Nov. 30th, 2004 @ 10:08 pm --past life--
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: you make me feel like a natural woman


aba! ambitious pala ako! haha!

dated sometime in Year 2000
"I ran across the woods, dry leaves scrolling down my feet. Soon my dreams will be within reach. The path I will take will be cleared. It will make way with open arms and will embrace my soul to keep. My hair brushed my face, the wind blew under my ears. It made me feel so free, ready to fly with the sea gulls across the world, never to return from the nightmare I was before. I have a new beginning, a new life. I look forward to this day when I could witness the sunrise of my life. Exploding every extravagant colour within my heart, freeing myselft with the burden of life's uncertainty. I could reach the top of the mountain. Even i f my feet burned on fire, the flame in my heart will never cease. I will continue to strive in finding my way home, where i left my dear true heart. When I have reached the top, I will shout to my content and attend to the world's welcome as it praise the pride and might it had seen. I may fail each time I try, but failure will be a newly found challenge to be better each day and impose humility upon myself. I won't take other's path but I will make my own path for them to follow.

As I finally enter the meadow, where wild daffodls dance with the wind, I stopped and joined them praising God for the gifts he has given. It is how I feel and what I think that makes me different. My ideas will someday flow like honey dripping in a honey comb, to let nature taste the sweetness I have made.. I know I will.. someday. "
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Nov. 29th, 2004 @ 08:43 pm --nothing--
Current Mood: restless
Current Music: Sweetest Goodbye -- by Maroon 5


There are so many doors in our house. Separating the living room from the dining, the hallway, doors in each room, doors in the bathroom, the toilet, there were even doors which are aligned to each other that if you open all three.. you'd find yourself walking in and out the house in one straight way.

These doors so far had served their function.

I just wish I have the strength to break these.. and for once hinder them in fulfilling their very purpose.
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Nov. 25th, 2004 @ 05:18 pm 6 by 6
Current Mood: rushed

My boss [Damien, who has been running the place for 8 years] wrote down this list as he walked me through the "routine" for my first hour just to get my mind started at 5am in the morning.

1. Arrive at 4.45 - 5.00am
2. Check alarm - If RED swipe with card until light turns GREEN
3. Door should slide open for 15 secondes if it does not open, enter mall through centre doors using square key
4. Turn on lights in Kiosk -- 4 switches
5. Turn on dishwasher at wall -- make sure drain switch is not on
6. Turn on coffee machine -- take off cloth
7. Turn on grinder
8. Take both high-chairs outside kiosk
9. Turn on oven -- Check oven temp 170 degrees C
10. Upstairs to storeroom -- Lad muffin miz on trolley
hi fibre Bran
low fat Scone
11. Return to kiosk (haha! baka "daw" kasi makalimutan kong bumalik sa baba! kakatuwa talaga!)
12. a. Measure 4.7 L water into mixing bowl
b. Pour 10k bag of Hi-fibre mix on top
c. Measure 2.4L canola on top of mix
d. Connect hook
e. Check speed is in first gear
f. Set wall timer to 4 mins
g. Start mixer; Start timer
13. Spray 12 trays
14. Listen for timer to buzz -- turn off mixer and timer on buzz (OO NGA NAMAN!)
15. "SLAB" 6 bowls -- 1.5kg EXCLUDING weight of bowl (therefore press TARE everytime!!)
16. add ingredients:
a. Double choc -- 2 spoons choc paste; 1 1/2 cups choc chips
b. Bonoffi -- 2 bananas; 2 spoons caramel
c. Crm1 - Boysenb -- cream cheese (40secs); boysenb
d. Crm2 - Peach -- cream cheese (40 secs); peaches
e. Coffe Walnut -- 1/2 cup of cold coffee PREBAKE: spring of walnut
f. Yoghurt Apricot -- 3 Tbsp yogurt; Apricots PREBAKE: 1/4 apricot
17. Scoop into muffin trays and size
18. Bake for 34 min @ 170 degrees C

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.. that's "6 by 6"... 6 trays by 6 oclock.


and that's just for the first hour. after this i have to do 5 more trays of sweet muffins, then lowfat, bran, scones (a dozen each) and a maximum of 4K savoury muffins. On busy days I would need to do 'rebakes' .. again 5 more trays. Besides the priority muffins.. i have to learn how to make cakes, pastries, meringues, brownies, eccles, yoyos, afghans, sausage rolls.... the list can go ooonnnnnnnnnn...

*phew!


"The only pressure you have [during this hour] is the pressure you put on yourself".
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Nov. 25th, 2004 @ 04:56 pm ==Dont read testimonials==
Current Mood: irritated
Current Music: fever (ray charles with natalie cole)


*i got my heart broken twice today. how many times do i have to tell myself NEVER read other people's testimonials, especially... UGH!!!

huhuhuhuhuhu... wala lang, here i am face with the same dilemma every year.. every christmas to be exact. *sobs*(CHA if you're reading this.. you know this diba?!)

... Christmas is really the best reason/explanation/or in my case ---the best 'EXCuse..' to do that extra special to someone without initiating any suspicion whatsoever.

EWAN! bat ganito?!?!

i got less than 24 hours to decide. hmm.. the logical thing to do is just give it. Besides who else would use it?!?!? plus ive already wrapped it with the rest.. wala naman akong kilalang pwedeng pagbigyan nun.. hmm.. teka.. *isip isip isip isip....*

WAla talaga eh!

HAY BUHAY NI LOIDUH TALAGUH!

what do you guys think?! Argh! i should just give it, right?! (Duh you dont even know what im talking about! hahaha!) tsk tsk!!

umiral na naman ang kaengotan ni loidUH...

*fear_fall bit her lip*
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Nov. 15th, 2004 @ 10:35 pm No more evening chats..
Current Mood: indescribable

Tomorrow Im starting a coMPLETELy, outrageous job in which no acquired skills from my past jobs could prepare me (I never really thought of doing THAT before)!

hmm my shift will start from 5am till 1pm maximum. So there goes my EVENING CHATS.. but ill take that as a plus. hehe At least I'll be forced to sleep and not wait for someone to come online during those hours, only to get disappointed. mwehehe! And this would certainly be a way to break the cycle of the possible "holiday blues" that I occasionally have! hahaha! *Akin na lang yun*.

AND of course!!!! I get to have the rest of the day to myself. I can't wait to touch and tune that guitar, to set up the canvases and put colours in it, finish that cross stitch work and frame it, and of course DRAW DRAW DrAW!!!

Well that is.. if I DIDNT get a job in the afternoon.

Im starting to get nervous... is my brain already setup to speak english during that time? haha

Nonetheless.. Im sooo thankful to get this job! :D


This BAKING job! hahahahhaha!!!! (mainly muffins)




by the way... may BALOT na nabili si nanay! heehee!!
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Nov. 15th, 2004 @ 10:10 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: exhausted


3 days after exams (13 November) I found myself in two parties and crossing the harbour bridge. SA WAKAS!! I can breathe fresh air, laugh without worries, set order in my room (where’s my desk?), walk a lil lighter, smile a lil wider, completely forgot about my exam blues and I finally get to draw again yey!!

After my SCIGEN exam (which is just a good exam to end the year!) I hurried to get home. At least I tried to. Left central Auckland at 12 noon.. only to miss the bus in new lynn and when I finally got to Henderson… the bus that was meant to go to my place (sturges rd) didn’t arrive! So in short my travelling time ended up to be 3 bloody hours, and I even had to call my dad to pick me up!

Ayan tuloy I was late at Janice’s bday party! Hahaha! Nah joking! I intended to go to her place earlier (around 3pm but I didn’t make it till 4.30) just to help out. WOW the party was a blast J hehe! Indi naman niya kasi planong mag party talaga eh! Most impromptu 21st na ata yun. Her coming of age.

Ako na nga una dumating then rey after an hour, at kami pa ang pinakahuling umalis around 1am I think! Walang ginawa kung di kumain! Nakakabulol nga yung malilit na leche flan sa sarap yum yum!

Then the next day.. at 12 noon again we went to tito obet’s place. We had a choir practice, November bday celebrations and pyjama party all IN one! Astig! AYAN kumain na naman ng kumain. Kapag talaga nag sasama sama ang mga pinoy dito laging may handa! Naaalala ko when it was my first year here we used to attend prayer meetings at night kaya.. tumaba talaga ako. Then hmmm I guess on my second year… nawala. Indi ko na nga nabawi yung taba ko before!

Just the other day someone said Ive gone chubbier pero yesterday tita eminem mentioned na pumayat daw ako?! LOL!!! Siguro tumaba lang ako sa tulog! Haha weird!

*sigh of relief* gosh never felt soooooo good :D Not to mention today was fun too. LAUGHING MOMENTS sa north shore with Rean, Marjorie, Rey and Cherissa (after our surprise visit!). Hmm.. ang saya talaga ng may digital camera! Paparazzi Heeheehee!!
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Nov. 10th, 2004 @ 09:20 pm 48 inches
Current Mood: full
~~ i ate a total of 48 inches of subway for a period of one month ~~ (accdg to elaine's calculation.. pilit ko kasing sinasabi na 8 6-inch subway lang!) HAHA! obvious bang gusto ko lang gamitin yung FULL na Mood? But it's true!.. 48 inches.. between October and November (ie last two weeks of October and first two weeks of November)... woah.. Rose (highschool friend) told me that Im chubbier than before (cosidering the last time I saw her was... uhm.. 6 weeks ago?) YEY nagkakataba na rin sa wakas!!!! Yeba Yeba! ABA hindi ko alam nahihiyang pala ako sa mga exams! lol! BY THE WAY.. thank you LowLah Elaine for fixing my font size :D mwah!
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Nov. 9th, 2004 @ 08:45 pm Dorothy Shoes -- Vintage Shopping
Current Mood: hyper

Went to Uni today after a long time of studying in isolation. As usual it was packed, couldn't even find a vacant pc to check my webmail. I even saw a high school friend who asked me if I was still going out with the same guy.. HUH?!?!

~~~~~~~
But before heading to Uni, I was at K'rd (short for Karangahape Road), waiting for the LINK bus. Instinctively, I went inside Paper Bag Princess just to have a look around while waiting for my bus. It's a vintage shop. I particularly find it exciting and amusing to go in there. You just cant be sure what to expect. It's not a shop sellin the 'in' clothes, but with a lil imagination and inspiration from mismatching antics of sarah parker from sex and the city (1 more episode left!), you would have clothes ready to be romped at the catwalk, or decent enough to wear it at the sidewalk!

~~~~~~~
Jeans, jackets, shoes, sandals, bags, hair accessories, key chains, sunnies, caps, tops, dresses... AH you name it.. it's there.. and some of them are designer brands.

~~~~~~~
Just be patient and you will be rewarded. One shouldnt be daunted by the various, unorganised (except for the pants section in some shops) placement of the items. What usually happens is finding that perfect item with the right design, pattern and colour to match that green shoes God knows why you even bought it.. only to be wishing you were size 2 for goodness sake!

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Anyway for those who have never been into one, let me divulge you with 5 tips I came up with to make it as enjoyable as I endorse it to be:

~~>>1. Leave all your EXPECTATIONS OUT THE DOOR. It's nothing like a shops in the mall (some shops at least arrange the items in their corresponding colour). So please dont ask the question "do you have a size up"?
~~>>2. Be OPEN MINDED.
~~>>3. It's a second hand shop.. so..?? CHOOSE WISELY. Be extra picky okay?!
~~>>A. Having said number 3, I personally prefer buying pants, jackets and skirts instead of tops and dresses (baka magka putok! lol!)
~~>>B. Check BUTTONS, ZIPPERS, EDGES.
~~>>C. As much as possible dont choose WHITE.
~~>>4. Try it on. NO REFUND POLICY
~~>>5. ... last but not the least if you cant find your size or you found one but the wrong size.. LET GO. and MOVE ON! You can come back later.. items could be half priced by then. yep! VINTAGE SHOPS GO ON SALE TOO!!

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Remember it's worth the hunt ladies and gents (just be patient!) especially if you found something that you know you've always wanted.

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As for me I finally got those red shoes :D YEY!!
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Oct. 27th, 2004 @ 03:55 am A Closer Look in the Mirror
Current Mood: thankful

“your imperfections make you perfect”.

Literally speaking and appearance-wise this is true. Napagkaalaman ko lang just lately. Though when I heard this statement from a friend I know it rings some truth, I just didn’t have a good example back then. When I got my new phone… with built in camera.. wala akong ginawa (natural!) kung di mag take ng photos of everything.. from my stuff toys (not to mention.. binihisan ko pa with matching light effect!), my little mermaid curtain (which was very uncomplimentary to my peach bed linen), my dad (he really has that funny look whenever I take a photo of him), my mom eating (she eats quite a lot.. pero never ko siyang nakitang tumaba ng ganun! Hehe wow good genes I should say.. I sure think I got that from her! Hehe), my friend’s hands (kasi ang ganda eh.. yung long and pointy. She also plays the piano so well.. hmm.. I wonder.. if I learned how to play a piano would I have those hands too? Only the future can tell.. “future”.. i e enrol ko magiging anak ko sa piano lessons!), yung tito ko habang kumakain (ka-partner ko yun kumain sa KFC eh!)….at syempre pa.. I took pictures of myself..

And that’s when I realized that.. im not at all symmetrical as I thought I was when I see my reflection in the mirror. My right eye is smaller than the other.. this is more prominent first thing in the morning or whenever I woke up. I also have these two massive front teeth.. that makes me look like a squirrel. Even though I had braces (eh premature naman yun) it’s still a bit protruding. And then I have this nose… AH! (sakit na nga ng pinoy yun!). my ears.. na parang tenga ni legolas! And I also notice how much light can be reflected from my forehead!

But then…. As I said before.. your reflection doesn’t highlight these slight flaws. Your eye no matter how asymmetrical they are.. project the image of your nose, teeth, lips, ears, teeth, and itself.. as a whole.

Maybe this is how God sees us. He doesn’t look at our weaknesses and strengths, nor the mere fact that one leg is shorter than the other. For him we are indeed perfect. All the other imperfections cancel out just like a mathematical equation. Even if the two sides look different, God can prove to you.. that these are indeed equal to each other.

It could be difficult at times, for comparison’s sake. We can’t help that. But we know that we are either going to come out as egoistic maniacs who prided himself superior to others, OR a complete sucker who retreats in his shell. Either way we are left with nothing but our “SELF”..

Your imperfections make you perfect. For God never makes mistake. We shouldn’t even call it “imperfections”, hmm… it’s more of… a “surprise twist”, just like the ending of few films which make a great impact to the viewer (dead poet’s society). Or that unexpected mishap in the laboratory, which resulted to a discovery of something that wasn’t even intended. Or even that flavour in food that caused you to have another try to savour and deduce what has made it soo.. scrumptious!!

This is God’s twist, which compels you to be as remarkable, unexpected, fascinating person that you are.
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Oct. 26th, 2004 @ 02:45 am my Immortal
Current Mood: mellow
Current Music: --by evanescence--

It's all Mae's fault! hmph!

haha! goodness di na ako naawa sa kaibigan ko eh, she's been sick for almost 3 days now! Get well soon MaE!!!

(commercial break: im currently sitting on my brand new striking red swivel chair! hihi so comfy!)

So moving on.. what's up with Mae? Well, yesterday she was reading to me some of her journal entries. And there I was, got excited with the thought of walking down the memory lane so I absent-mindedly took my (as i found out later on!) 4-year-old diary.

Surprise, surprise (though not new to me anymore!).. my "immortal"s name kept on appearing in every entry! --- Amidst the euphoria, expectations and disappointments, uncertainties and amazements, confusions, trepidations, the heart-stopping-eye-gaZing moments and of course the speech-impaired first meeting -- it's there.

It's been four years.. wow, but for me it only seems like yesterday ("there's just too much that time cannot erase"). My diary entries then and now even have a perfect correlation (hehe! too much quantitative genetics).

bittersweet.

But it managed to make me smile.
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