Friends

the tv just told me that i NEED kinoki foot pads

and what does john stossel think?

watching the psych of batman on the history channel with a sideways glance at the computer every few minutes so i can track the incoming next round of storms.
thankfully jaxen is asleep for now.
what a night

Hi,

This is one of my recent acrylic on canvas painting titled "COURAGE"

Phoebe basking in the glory of sunflowers, their presence giving her the strength and courage to live life like these admirable flowers . I was thinking of an ex-colleague cum friend when I was painting this and I want to dedicate this painting to her too. I hope she will be as brave as these sunflowers….which turn their heads towards the sun and not shy away, their heads tracking the position of the sun from dawn to dusk. Likewise, she can be like them….celebrating life’s ups and downs in a courageous fashion :D

COURAGE is now available as tees and other merchandise at my Zazzle store :D Click below to view :D


http://rdr.zazzle.com/img/imt-prd/isz-m/pd-235662109266852520/tl-courage_shirt.jpg

Hi folks Ive been a lurker on here for ages since Ive never been able to work out how to upload photos on lj but I think I've finally got it...

This is a drawing of a radio (fyi its meant to be wonky/uneven) on the inside of my upper arm I got done by Kat at Fox Body Art in Melbourne late last year.

( radio - late 07 )

and heres to the Beatles and music in general from June this year also by Kat at Fox Body Art (who is sadly now actually living in London)-

( here comes the sun - june 08 )

http://picasaweb.google.com/Magicdog76/Wedding
these are from my brothers camera. i love the video of jax and i walking, he was trying to stomp and amazingly my shoes once again sound like horse hooves lol..

jaxen is screaming, it sounds like something next door got hit.
the second wave of the latest storm is moving in.
the sky is light every few seconds and the thunder feels like it is shaking the whole house

i would let kailan and lola in here but they are so scared they are pissing with every big boom. i need to put diapers on them.

jaxen is so exausted, it is just making everything worse.

i made it home. i ducked out of my dads during a lull in the rain. only to hit an intense patch of storm where the rain was so heavy i had to pull over with my flashers on.
and then a little further on i had to pull over in hail.
it rained again heavy when i got home. and now it sounds like there is another one coming in.
kailan and lola are going insane.
i was suppose to drive down to jeanis work tonight but i cannot take the chance of getting stuck out there again with the baby.

Okay, I admit it, sometimes I make myself out to be more evil than I am.

It’s because I have a black sense of humour.

I don’t really pick on the old and frail.

Just the old.

The world’s a bit of a funny place.

The pub I work in is a bit of a rough joint, I’ve already thrown out a half dozen or so trouble makers. The guy I work with doesn’t know what to make of me, neither do the patrons. They’ve seen me dragging guys out, and using their faces to open the door, on the one hand, then in my break they see me sitting by the pokies with a pile of books studying Latin and reading philosophy.

It works the other way around too. On Friday I stopped by uni before work, in my uniform to pick up my text books for the coming week, and I ran into Michael Foley, a theology lecturer I really like. We spoke for a while about Hegel and the process theologians – then about my honours project, which he thinks is a brilliant idea, then he asked me where I was off to, and I told him the pub I worked in, and he asked what I did, and I told him, and I could see he was a little shocked, though he tried to cover it up.

For a long time I guess I was ashamed of the work I do. Like I never tried to hide it, but I didn’t like admitting it either. I mean it doesn’t say much about you if you make your money tossing drunks out of a pub, it doesn’t really make you a man, or not what I think a man should be. It’s a nasty, violent, brutish job – you’re a thug in a uniform, who thumps guys for a living, but I’m really trying hard to be at peace with myself at the moment, and I guess I’m proud of the fact it’s put me through uni. I mean its all brawn, whether it’s working as a loss prevention officer, doing escorts, working as a door man, bouncing a strip club on the cross – they are hiring you as muscle and that’s it, as a juggler.

But I think you need to be honest with yourself. People live TV lives in their own minds, they go around living in an image of who they think they should be, but don’t just stop and be honest, and be who they are. They aspire to impossible realities created in the media, in love songs, movies, sitcoms, while all the time ignoring their self in their true surroundings. I think deep down, it’s because a lot of people just don’t like who they are, so they try to be this impossible someone else.

They can’t admit they get a kick out of doing spiteful and irrational things, so are always struggling with themselves to hide their true nature. They never admit who they are, because it goes against the grain of the stereotype they try and live by. They scorn those who are better at life then they are, and despise those who are not on their own ‘perceived’ level. Their wants become imperative psychological needs they can’t function without. Nothing is too good for them, but then nothing is ever good enough. They try and make themselves more emotionally complex then they are. I see these people, and I think I understand them, because sometimes I can be like them. I get sucked into that strange television world.

But I’m Timb, I study philosophy, Latin and English literature, I work in a pub, I keep a live journal, I sometimes write novels, and I want to be an English Professor one day. There’s not really much more to me than that and I don't think there needs to be.

So I finally got my second tattoo yesterday after work. It's a beta fish. It took about two hours and it's still really fresh.

( nsfw )

wedding 19july2008

the wedding pics from my dads camera

stuck at my dads in a horrible thunder storm
he is outside with an umbrella digging a ditch to keep the basement from flooding
he is nuts
i am shuddering with each lightening strike

i had a weeks worth of chores to catch up on today and jaxen was just clingy and needy and i had to do bits and pieces here and there.
but i managed to get everything put away that we got last night. i re arranged the tupperware cupboard, (which was no small feat by any means), all the birds got baths, including the parakeets who also got a cage cleaning. fed all the animals, did 5 loads of laundry so far, 3 loads of dishes, did the cat litter. cooked 2 meals.

i am beat. lol

jax has 2 short interrupted naps, so my goal is to keep him awake so he will sleep through the night and not get up at 3am to eat.

Color scheme ideas, anyone? If you'd like to give any input on this, I'd say list four colors that you like and would go good together, especially with this little critter~

Cachaca, ginger, honey, lime and mint. The "Summer in Sao Paolo" @ Deep Ellum

I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching lately, trying to work out if I’m fundamentally evil or not, and I don’t know. I do some pretty evil things. I like to sneak up on customers at work and fart, then find a good hiding spot and see what happens. One time while I was working at the Penrith JB HIFI I started a domestic with a young mid twenties couple

“Did you fart”

“No”

“I know you did, admit it”

“You’re always accusing me of things, why don’t you get off my back for a change”

It got really out of control, and ended with her throwing some shopping bags, and calling him a selfish bastard then storming out. I mean at any time I could have stepped in and said it was me, but there was a part of me that really enjoyed the chaos I created.

At work I like to pick on the old and frail. I really enjoy it. I don’t know why.

“What are you staring at old man?”

“Nothing, nothing”

“You’re drunk aren’t you? Admit it”

Like it’s a genuine feeling of joy, and I don’t know why. Especially elderly couples. I really like being rude to them for some reason. But that’s more petty than evil, I guess, and if I’m completely honest, most of the stuff I like doing is petty.

Even as a teenager. We used to catch cats and race them. You get some diluted car battery acid, just enough with a sting in it, then hold them by the tail, and using an eye dropped squirt a little on their arse, and they fly like rockets. You go looking for a group of people, usually stoners, or a couple who are sitting somewhere making out, and line your cats up.

And it’s funny but evil.

When I get bored I’ll grab my sling shot, and walk down the street shooting out the street lights as I go, one by one. I used to steal people’s pets with a guy I knew, and dye them different colours.

I like driving slow sometimes on the M4 for kicks, or pretending to let someone into the lane then speeding up, then slowing down, then speeding up again, or getting behind someone on a country road, and driving with my high beams on. Just petty stuff like that.

But that’s the part I don’t get. If it’s wrong, why do I enjoy doing it so much? Why is it fun? I mean from an evolutionary point of view it doesn’t make sense, and it makes even less sense from a Christian point of view. Like we have empathy so we can understand others, and we get good feelings from charity, helping others, and doing the right thing, but at the same time, we get enjoyment out of tormenting others, or petty acts we sometimes perpetrate. ]

It doesn’t make sense.

The year of Jenn is going well. I’ve lost another 30lbs since April and I really can’t wait to be in Onederland, as my trainer calls it. I hope to be in the 100lbs range by the end of September! Woot.

I just got back from my Tiger Schulman class. It was a blast. I wish it weren’t so expensive; I’d probably keep with it. Instead, I think my trainer and I are going to look for a different place. I really want to take a kickboxing class. Just haven’t found one yet.

This week on SYTYCD was a shocker to say the least. I had picked Comfort and Mark to leave, only because they were the weakest dancers left. But Will? Come on! That was SO unfair. Okay, it’s probably my fault because I didn’t vote, like countless others who probably thought the same thing. You’d think I’d learn after Daughtry was kicked off Idol. Ah well. The show was awesome though, I loved most of the routines.

Last weekend I saw the Dark Knight. I was sitting in the second row…that’s how crowded it was at 10am Sunday. Yikes. What a great movie! Heath did an awesome job, he really gave the Joker a creepy streak that was missing in Jack’s performance. Such a shame he’s gone. I really liked him. Bale, of course, is wonderful. Even when he’s in a shitty movie, he’s awesome. And I’ve given him a new McHottie name. Hottie McKnight. I think it fits. LOL.

I actually started the whole McNickname thing before they started doing Dr. McDreamy for Grey’s Anatomy. The names I’ve come up with so far (In no order):

Hottie McHottie

 

Hottie McHottiehey

 

Hottie McKarate

 

And now Hottie McKnight

 

I have a few more faves that I haven't come up with their Hottie names yet, but I'm working on it! Though I can’t get credit for the McNickname thing, I just love how I come up with these great ideas and someone else makes it popular. I’m waiting for the Vampmance to be the new it word.

A few weeks ago I started reading Sherrilyn Keynon’s Dark Hunter series. I loved the concept behind the stories, but I didn’t really like the first few I read and ended up skipping most of the plot and focused on the romance and how it was written. But then this character, Acheron, started to stand out. He’s a great character and when I found out he was having his own book in August, I finished reading the series to catch up. For me, the books seemed to get better, then they reverted back to eh status, but I still wanted to make sure I had all of the info on Ash that I could get.

Jenn loves angsty, tortured characters. Ash has to be one of the most fucked over characters I’ve ever come across. I’m very interested to see what the author will put the poor guy through with her new book. I’m actually going to buy this one, considering I read all the other ones for free.

The most depressing thing about reading so many romance books, in a row, isn’t the constant repetition of the authors, no…it’s the longing for a relationship. Considering I’m a cynic, I would never expect a guy to act like they do in romance books. Granted, there are some out there who would be open with their emotions, strong willed, stubborn, yet sweet and romantic, manly and what not. However, I sometimes feel like *some* of these romances give people the wrong idea about love and relationships. Yes, yes, I know it’s fiction. It’s fantasy. It’s not supposed to be based in “reality”, but when you read 10-15 books in a row, that are romance to the nth degree, it kinda makes you wish you could find something like that.

I’m practical. I’ve been in a couple long term relationships. Have seen many, many relationships grow, change, and fail. Hell, I have more divorces in my family than marriages. We’re adding another one to the family soon. Great. And it was the one couple I really thought had a chance to make it.

Trying to focus on the Jenn has been great for me. I’ve been told I’m happier. I’m not so moody anymore. I definitely have more energy and vigor. My head is in a good place. If it didn’t happen when I was a crabby bitch, you’d figure it would happen when I’ve got my head on straight. Yeah, well, hasn’t happened yet.

My window of opportunity to have a family, if I actually do decide to have one, is slowly dwindling. More women are having children in their early 40’s, so I know that I have time, but each year that passes, I’m starting to realize my time isn’t infinite anymore.  No, my biological clock isn’t ticking. I don’t have a strong desire to have a kid. But if I do find Mr. Right for Jenn, and he wants kids, and I decide I want kids too…I might be cutting it too close.

I want to find someone to share my life with. I want someone who I can depend on and who can depend on me. I want someone to snuggle with late at night watching the news or having a quite Sunday reading books or playing video games. I want someone to be there for me. I want to be someone’s number one priority. And vice versa.

At this point, I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve tried the bar scene. I’ve tried online. I’ve tried not trying. Nothing seems to give. My mother’s voice keeps creeping up in the back of my head saying, “Maybe it’s not meant to be.”  While I know, deep down, she’s right, I try not listen to it often. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be loved. As much as I’ve suffered and given and helped people in my life, I feel like it’s my turn. I have a lot of love to give and I know, if he’s out there, we’ll have the best relationships out of anyone in my family. I won’t settle. I won’t jump into something. I want to take my time and build something so special, so wonderful, that it will make every romance quake in their boots. I’ve seen it. People have found it. I just hope I can find it too.

f you Bergeron process.

Hi, Ive been a member of this community for a couple of years now and have been looking for inspiration for my first tatt, ive always wanted one but never seen the "right" one for me.
But 14 weeks ago my wife gave birth to my first child, a little boy we named Noah.....so i was wondering if there is anyone with some artistic flair who can help me come up with something, i want his name, not sure what kind of lettering (im open to ideas) but i was thinking a cluster of stars with it.......i really want to get it on my forarm just below the elbow, preferably all the way round the arm.....but im totally open to suggestions......if anyone can help me it would be greatly appreciated as i cant draw for shit lol