Porcelain

2:58pm: in the end there can be only one...
this is my last post. some things in life are more important than others.

miss u all.

clara.

10:53pm: a really long day...
i tidied<---is that how you spell it? the cuboards at work today.

i am so tired. i feel mentally drained.

i just want to be along for a while. friends don't worry about me.

ever feel like what you do is worthless?

i think this year is the last year i will cosplay.

it is fun but it's time to grow up and buy a house and car.

*all grown up* i still wouldn't mind being the photographer tho. *pokes jo and anli*

sam i wish you were here i need a hug.

10:52pm: *sigh*
i hate you protoculture.

you know me too well :P

11:34pm: i hate remembering...
i hate remembering about the times i was at school. they wern't happy years.
i just want to be alone for a while till i forget again.

11:11pm: back in the day...
i was just thinking about my youth. i know i am just 23 but i feel old.

talking to the young wipper snappers at work.

i used to go to the big day out and go clubbing.

but now i'd rather stay home curled up nice and warm and watch anime.

what a vast difference.

i remember getting my first gig at the leedy dancing on the podium on wednesday nights.

then the globe wednesday nights, then the church every weekend. then doing modeling and promo for the church.

those days are like a light fog in the morning. it's gone before the sun can touch the sand.

everyone out there enjoy your age, it's gone in a year.

11:03pm: japanese aural test tommorow.
well it's my final exam before i graduate, if i graduate. i have passed every other test. the only things that can use a little work is my katakana and roomanji. i forget the repeated characters and letters.

japanese 2003 here i come, i get to learn some kanji characters now. and next year i will study mandarin.

9:53pm: japan style
i really did not know much about the fashion scene in japan, harajuko, yamanba, ganguro. it was all a blurr to me until my colour co-ordinated brother gave me the heads up...

on the waicon site i posted these links but i will post them here too.

http://www.style-arena.jp/english/index.htm - japan style online

http://www.photomatt.com/pictures/0004/index.html - cool kids in harajuku

http://www.livemusicstudio.com/mac/pages/ganguro.html - the difference between ganguro and yamanba

what scares me the most is that i inadvertantly dressed ganguro style[candy raver] i was pretty tanned and wore high heeled shoes to make me taller cause i was short, wore gators[those fluffy things on the girls legs like leg warmers] and i bleached my hair, wore blue contacts and wore glittery/light makeup and fake flowers in my hair... not as heavy in those pics on the link. but i am still guilty...

i want to get rid of my tan... :(

9:51pm: brrrr
it is so damn cold today. i had to get to work by 7:30am for a meeting and it was cold. was on the shop floor serving all day, it was cold. had to catch a bus home and walk home from the bus stop, it was cold.

maybe another ice age is comming.

10:17pm: sunday- karaoke till you DIE!
i had the best day sunday.

i got up early and semi cleaned the house becasue i was going to have a karaoke fundraiser. first to arrive was leanne and her mum, then wilson and friends then zing. not a big turn out. 9 ppl including me and jason. we were all in formal wear :) except zing but that's cool she was a good singer!.

tenzan won the prize for best singer. a foot spa. yayness.

we are starting a fan club for tenz... prolly even a community if it ever gets big enough.

he is prince of karaoke!

i sung heaps of ffx songs and prince of tennis songs. proberly drove everyone insane. my voice started to flail towards the end of the night. i have a bad cold. but i don't think anyone noticed.

i want to karaoke more. i think i will hold another one in future.

11:01am: Bit of a bender...
i don't know why but last night i tried messaging and calling candy but she didn't answer... i hope she is okay.

since i couldn't get in touch with her i went and played ddr in northbridge straight after work. $30.00 to go till i get my gold card. ^-^

after it hit 6:30 i decided to taxi it home... maybe candy left an email saying she couldn't make it... umm no *gets worried*

well i walk in on jase having a good slosh fest. i give everyone i know a call to see what they were doing.

i was on the phone with wilson for aages and then conference called with leanne too... but when i tried to call back it was engaged :(.

so i went out with jase and his mate tony. we got pretty drunk and i attempted playing ddr, i sucked... but the drunker i got the better i got :)

i bumped into jo while in time zone! hi jo *waves* she was out having silly fun, she told me she went home at 1... lucky... i was craving my bed around that time too... i am so old.

we didn't manage to get home till the wee hours of the morning because jason was feeling a little sick :(
and the fricking taxi company even tho we called 5 times didn't actually list us for a pickup, so we ended up catching a taxi with total strangers who were nice... i was so sleepy i can't remember getting home really...

weuh i gotta go... i have work :P

but tonight i am meeting leanne and wilson for bubble tea, karaoke and fun!

ja ma ta

5:01pm: everything is finally falling into place.
i got my final bills for my mobile accounts. first thing next week is i gotta pay them then no more debt!!!

as for my cosplaying i have been very busy with work and japanese classes but once the term is done i am hoping to work on my costumes and maybe have a photo shoot in about 3 weeks time.

i spent alot of time talking to lehni and candy, catching up and talking about cosplay... over an hour and a half of conversation. i won 20 bucks on my scratchy, candy is a very lucky person to have around ^-^

tommorow night jason is going out with his mates so i have organised to go to jafwa with candy and her boyfriend maybe do some wow lan stuff too after :)

i got my boots for the gunner costume and the boots for the songstress costume. i am so happy ^^.

this week has been good. and next sunday is the karaoke fundraiser. please come and support panic. $10.00 a ticket. be there or be squarer.

everyone have a good weekend. i get tuesday off too... yipee

today i got my arse into gear and spoke to metway real estate about hiring out imax theatre... it's a possibility. might see them tuesday.

11:20am: yek
work

10:04am: my new samsung d500 *love*
i have a new mobile and a new number so friends email me to get it.... hotmail address please.

heh i did a 13 hour shift yesterday. i am so screwed. i am delirious and mad. staying up and standing for that long made my mind go mad. last time that happened was at waicon.

i felt like typing roflmao continuously. so that's why i am am making an entry today instead.

i must be in too much of a good mood. i ended up having a conversation without abuse to someone i reallt didn't expect anything like that from. protoculture.

he reminds me of someone i knew when i was 15. MaxImuM. well maximum was rude unreasonable and wanted to kill me. i was an annoying 16 year old who was always attracting his attention on mIRC. attracting... maybe that is too much of a romanced word for this entry. i was walking into him on chat constantly. being "put in line" for my 15 yr old statements. i really thought i knew everything. boy was i wrong. i still don't like him now and even when i join that old mirc channel he is still there putting 15 yr old girls into line. and he still kick/bans me. immature, he never changed.

i never thought i'd says this but i needed him. max, for all the abuse and outrageous arguments. i can look back now and laugh at it.

i don't tip toe around people, not like i used to before max. i think about what i say and how i'd look by saying it. self concious to a degree but delivering the truth when it needs to be said. i have kinda turned into his minion? no not minion, i don't think i am below him. i have advanced my master. he never had any friends and he never could say i learnt this from a friend. because he had none.

sometimes people of this world seem unreasonable and harsh and you feel like you'd rather be dead than acknowledge they deserve to live as much as your friends. but people are entitled to think they way they want and say the things they want to say. and because of that people have different toleance levels and certain things we consider weird or normal.

because of my life experience i don't reguard people who like pairings *cough* as paedophiles, i don't think gay people are less than human, i don't think that people are classified as popular or cool are better than people who are considered unpopular or loners.

maybe i am just blabbering from lack of proper rest.

there are worse things in life. than a life time enemy.

you learn things from them as much as your friends.

well back to being 23, old wrinkly. and still as unpopular as i was in yr 4. :P

10:08pm: work work work work
no this is no dejavu. i am working tommorow. today was supposed to be my day off but eh. i don't mind. more money for me.

i am a bit tired. might go snooze.

2:26am: ever had one of those days?
even if something bad happened it couldn't ruin it.

well i over worked an hour without knowing today, and i didn't mind.

i studied hard for a test that got moved to thursday. meh it don't bother me.

and i read some interesting words on protocultured's journal. and all it did was make me happy.

today is good. i don't know wether it is from being up so late.

but i really can't be in a bad mood.

btw

big hi to lauryn: hows job hunting going?

sam: sink another pint for me.

puffywuffywoo: well this is a hi to ben who's finally back in w.a. sorry it's a bit belated.

lehni: hiiiii i haven't been able to catch up with you in a while. sorry. how uni?

laura: eep sorry i can't remember your lj name but hiii. gotta catch up for some wacky stuff... yeh

backbird: hey shona, when can you come over to play animal crossing?

tenzan: i will make the kareoke fundraiser soon provided i can organise a day off in advance with work.

hitomi: heya, i got your letter and the present. ^^ thankyou. come visit aus soon.

eh hi everyone else. i talk to the rest of you pretty often so that's my excuse for not taking the time to write something. *waves at wendy and christina* :P

ah, i am going to go knit. bye

6:03pm: ahhh
yay 2 days of r and r.

jason got a wikid printer with a cd print function. w00t.

i have been busy all day compling cd covers and lables. soo fun.

now my anime collection looks pro ne.

9:48pm: why why why
today i woke up to no power in the house...

some massive storm last night blew down a 20 storey crane onto the bridge near my house.

because i have a tin roof the wind howled soo loud. i hid under my blanky in vain.

i ran downstairs at 6 in the morning to the comforting arms of jason *snuggly*.

the busses were interruppted by the bridge being closed and it was f'ed.

i forgot my bus pass and had to cab it home since all i had was 25c.

what a day ay.

1:01am: housewarming party
yay i went to amandas housewarming tonight and now i am tired. good night.

10:54pm: mmm thick socks
my feet feel so much better in these $10 socks.

there was a crazy man outside my work tonight yelling and throwing chairs *scarey*

i am so angry now i could scream.

12:20am: EVERYONE JUST GET OVER IT
i try to be the understanding type.

who listens to both sides and gives the best advice on the situation.

but life has it's way of f ing you over majorly.

big thanks goes out to leareth and lord of darkness for helping me keep my sanity.

lea i am on your side.

protoculture, no one likes you anyways so what leanne said was a given.

mitsawoogi, why are you backing a turd like proto.

samika, you got in the way of a flame war. the respose you got wasn't a surprise. thanks for your mature input.

i have a friend who just suffered alot recently. his fiance miscarried and they broke up. your problems compared to this are nothing, not even a speck of dust.

and yet you carry on like you have nothing to live for. you have friends who care. family to go to. all 4 limbs and your smell sight touch. everything in tact.

what do you insist that you are more important, you mood swings, non stop negativity, a lack of humanity.

all you people go away until you can join the human race again.

9:51am: hectic
my life is so full right now, work, study, relationship, friends.

i am bursting at the seams trying to catch up with everyone.

luckily i have some time to do homework today! *studies hard*

oh and i have decided to cosplay full moon from full moon wo sagashite.... only problem is finding the wig.

and i have to start excercising again, i have become such a greedy guts and i am putting on weight :P

*full* another way to make my life full

and i have the kareoke fundraiser comming up soon... i want to make it in 2 weeks time on my next roster.

everyone is going to be dressed in formal gear and none of my formal dresses are comfortable.

i am too big for them i can't breathe. lol

i want the kareoke fundraiser to be during jason's holidays so i can get dressed up with him ^^

and work oh what a day... i got my first complaint. next time i see an angry customer i am going to walk the other way instead of trying to help.

3:32am: someone i don't know called
some idiot bitch called my phone 3 times. now i am awake. 3am in the morning.

if someone calls a wrong number they don't sit there silent and hang up.

you say "sorry wrong number", get yelled at and don't call the number again.

she called 3 times. apparently she was trying to get her dad but got one digit wrong.

she apologised in a sms. jason and i tried calling her back many times but she just ignored the calls. y not answer and say sorry i dialed the wrong number.

grrrr i have work in 7 and a half hours and i can't get back to sleep.

btw during the daty we went shopping at carousell. w00tyness i have airlite shoes, not flattering. from my ankles down i look like an old woman. but hey no hurty hurty right. thanks jason for getting me the shoes ^^ *love*

7:52pm: ow ow ow ow ow
my feret r killing me.

tommorrow is my day off so i think i will go work shoe shopping.

and i am so tired.

feh.

-_- ...zZzZz

6:19pm: i feel so small
i have msn as my home screen page on my browser... i know, i am so old. but sometimes news is interesting. crap what am i saying. well anyways i came across these pictures which just remind me it is a big universe.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6955261/?GT1=6542

Your Japanese Name Is...

Hana Aburakoji

i believe hana means flowers in japanese ^.^

11:43am: me?
so nicked from may's blog. gomenasai sumimasen

Your #1 Match: ENFJ

The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.

Your #2 Match: ENTJ

The Executive You are a natural leader - with confidence and strength that inspires others. Driven to succeed, you are always looking for ways to gain, power, knowledge, and expertise. Sometimes you aren't the most considerate person, especially to those who are a bit slow. You are not easily intimidated - and you have a commanding, awe-inspiring presence. You would make a great CEO, entrepreneur, or consultant.

Your #3 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #4 Match: ENTP

The Visionary You are charming, outgoing, friendly. You make a good first impression. You possess good negotiating skills and can convince anyone of anything. Happy to be the center of attention, you love to tell stories and show off. You're very clever, but not disciplined enough to do well in structured environments. You would make a great entrpreneur, marketing executive, or actor.

Your #5 Match: ESFJ

The Caregiver You are sympathetic and caring, putting friends and family first. A creature of habit, you prefer routines and have trouble with change. You love being in groups - whether you're helping people or working on a project. You are good at listening, laughing, and bringing out the best in people. You would make a great nurse, social worker, or teacher.