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Monday, April 25th, 2005
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11:57 pm - Phoenix.
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I kind of want to start a new journal. Just start all over again. I don't know what it will be or what it will look like, but if it happens, it will be within the next week or so. You'll know it if you see it, most likely.
Done. Come find me.
current music: Siouxsie - Happy House
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4:02 pm
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I would really just like to know where I stand with everybody. If you like me, if you hate me, if you don't want to talk to me, whatever.
Seriously. Tell me. I'm sick of guessing.
Loneliness follows Miranda, and Miranda is always alone.
current mood: annoyed
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| Sunday, April 24th, 2005
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12:03 pm
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New layout. Aimee Mann'D. Woot. It's back to S1 because I hated how Opal showed up on the school computers and how the comment pages took forever to load with the layouts I used. Stupid S2.
I'm so glad I read those two chapters in my History book. The writers of that book are soooo funny. I feel like a total geek for 1) understanding the joke and 2) laughing at it, but hee. They're so witty. <3 I might have to make a habit out of reading the chapters now, especially since I'm getting more interested in the stuff we're talking about.
The essay test was soooo easy. I was telling my friends how I would die if we got the pop culture essay as the required one while we were having a mini cram session right before he passed out the paper with the questions on it. We get the paper, and I look at Natalie and Natalie looks at me and we both start laughing because it's the pop culture question.
I think I did pretty well on it. I wrote more than I've ever written for an essay in that class and I knew everything I had to talk about. I avoided McCarthyism, even though I knew all about it, just because I wasn't sure what to say about it in relation to everything else. I mentioned everything I needed to, though.
The second essay, the one of our choosing, was pretty easy, too. We could either talk about the GI Bill, what led up to the Cold War, or the Brown vs. The Board of Education deal. I picked the latter of the three, just because I knew stuff about the Civil Rights movement from having to read Why We Can't Wait in English. I didn't finish it (I spent all my time on the required one), but I tried to get the main point across in the two or three paragraphs I wrote.
I really dig essay tests, I've decided. I also really really dig reading the book, despite how insanely long the chapters are. Hee. I need to post an example of why it's so funny just so I don't feel like a geek. Heeeee. Oh, Bailey. <3
current mood: okay current music: Paola - Above The Candystore
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| Friday, April 22nd, 2005
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9:17 pm
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4:52 pm
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| Thursday, April 21st, 2005
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9:16 pm
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Mark this day down, because I'm sort of stoked for APUSH now. We've just finished going over the Cold War, so things are getting a little more recent and therefore more interesting to me.
We have an essay test tomorrow, which shouldn't be too bad. He gave us a list of 8 possible contenders for the essay, so I get to read the book tonight and make notes and stuff. The only problem is... I'll probably forget a good amount of it. And the last essay we wrote as part of a test? I kiiiinda cheated on. It was about the Progressive Movement and all that stuff and I had to talk about the aims of the Progressivists and the muckrakers and all that... and I wrote them out on a little piece of paper in list format. And I ended up with an A. -_-.
But anyway, these essays seem relatively easy. One of them is required (he won't tell us which one - it's the teacher trick of getting us to study everything), and we can pick from one of the others. I think he gives us three to chose from. I hope my favorite is on there - it's number 6 on the list.
"How did television and other innovations of the consumer age affect American politics and culture in the 1950's? You should include in your answer some of the following: the changing role of women, McCarthyism and the Red Scare, presidential elections, improved lifestyle, and increased consumerism."
How. Easy. I mean really. That's just as excuse for me to geek out for a page about pop culture. I have a feeling it'll be one of the three, because he had us watch a video on Elvis & how "awesome" he was (I put that in quotes because I'm not on the lovetrain). He also made a big deal about the consumerism behind his career and the boost in youth culture that came along with it.
The one thing I'm not really looking forward to in APUSH right now is the next group project. Even though my last group (The Manhattan Project, woot) managed to get a 100% on the project, I just don't like group projects. Too much pressure, I think, especially if it's one of the ones where he asks you questions afterwards.
Anyway. Off to read 57 pages. -_-. I hate how long these chapters are. Guh.
current mood: optimistic current music: The Clash - Spanish Bombs [ rockonlily's Mix CD]
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4:12 pm - Maybe I am Calmer Now
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Yay for being in a better mood finally. Charissa's suddenly being really chatty with me, and it's sort of freaking me out because she's not usually like that. I'm not really complaining, though, since I want us all (read: Jessica/Nicole/Charissa) to be the core four again.
I'm not sure where I stand with Ali & Stephanie. Stephanie got the impression from my last post that I only hang out with them because I'm bored, which I didn't mean at all. I forget how I put it and I'm too lazy to go back and check, but I meant to say that hanging around this house all the time = boredom and Ali + Stephanie + Greg out of house = not boredom. And I really love hanging out with them because I get the feeling that they "get" me. Etc. Stephanie posted about it in her journal, I commented, and this morning she was talking to me like normal, so... I don't know what the deal there is. :\
I got my hair cut & highlighted yesterday. I usually get red highlights and by the time I go in for my next haircut it's faded to a light brown. This was the case yesterday, so I decide to go ahead and highlight it. My hair's pretty red now. Or orange, depending on the light. In low light, or as I like to call it "normal light," it's a nice dark red. Under flourescent/bright light? Hoshit.
I dig it, though. I've had mixed reviews at school. Missy (our hairdresser) said it was because every time I get it highlighted, it'll come out brighter than it was before since you can't highlight the same spots each time they way she does it (she pulls it through a cap and paints around). So now my hair looks like it was dyed red and a few spots were missed. But alas, I'm not worried about it. My friends like it, I like it, some people are a little freaked out by it. Hosty should have waited until today or this weekend to take those pictures so that my hair's not everywhere and has color in it.
Uuuh. Yeah.
current mood: calmer now current music: Siouxsie & Co. - Face To Face
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| Tuesday, April 19th, 2005
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4:55 pm - And The Moth Don't Care
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I'm sort of in a weird place right now. I was okay yesterday, but today all of a sudden in Pychology (it's always in Psych) I dipped back down into emo!Greg mode.
Broad Ripple was nice. It was really hot out. I don't know how the pictures came out, but my hair was acting crazy and my eyes are closed in half of them. I know this because my hair is in need of a cut (and highlight) and the sun wasn't cooperating with us. Meh. Hosty took two rolls and had to get home to her kids and stuff, so Mom & I just walked around a bit. Hosty gave me two rolls of film to use for cross-processing and I hopped over to the Rainbow Bridge(I don't know if that's the actual name, but it's what everyone calls it) by Future Shock. I took some pictures of it, some pictures of a dumpster that had a bunch of paint on it, some guy's car that was parked in front of a bush with flowers which was in front of a random wooden thing. I found some fun grafitti somewhere in an alley and that was my one roll. I need to take the rest. I don't know when I'll get to do that.
I ended up getting Siouxsie's "Superstition" and Aimee Mann's "Lost In Space" at Indy CD. The latter is a good 2/3 of the reason why I'm in a weird mood. "The Moth" and "It's Not" are making me think about things and I'm really understanding why people always say that Aimee Mann writes about things that are relative to everybody. They're sure as hell relative to me right now. You can pretty much look up the lyrics and infer from them why I'm in the mood I'm in.
It's sort of ridiculous that I'm in this mood, what with the whole "I'm gonna LIVE!" entry I posted a few days ago. Whenever I get in my emo mode it just HITS me and I don't know how or why. Something will happen and it'll remind me of whatever has been bugging me the past few days or so and I start thinking about it and fixating on it and you have an emo!Greg. Which isn't the best Greg to be around.
I think what initially set it off was when I went over to Jessica & Charissa this morning and told them that I had been thinking about things and that we (meaning Charissa, Jessica, Nicole, and myself) should all hang out sometime. I had realized that I'd been spending an insane amount of time with Ali & Stephanie in recent months (I realized this a while ago, actually, but just now tried to do something about it), and they both bitched at me about how whenever they IM me I'm always in the other room (which I honestly am) or when they try to call me I never answer. Then Jessica tells me that Nicole thinks that I'm all different and bitchy now that I'm hanging out with Ali & Stephanie all the time.
I just don't know how to deal. I really dig Ali and Stephanie and Charissa and Jessica and Nicole, but Ali & Stephanie and Charissa/Nicole/Jessica are two totally seperate entities. Ali & Stephanie almost always ask me if I want to do anything and since I'm always desperate to get out of this house, I usually go along with them. With CNJ, it's totally different. I don't really remember the last time they wanted me to do something with them (barring Nicole wanting to hang out over break, but I was honestly busy that day and I'm not sure if they believe me or not). And I'm not really the type of person who'll ask someone if they want to hang out, since I don't have a way of getting everyone together since I don't have a car and everything.
I don't know. I guess I just wasn't expecting that reaction from Charissa (Jessica didn't give me much, she just agreed with Charissa). Especially since I'm the one who proposed the idea of us hanging out together, since that never happens and is an indicator that I'd actually be willing to do something this time around.
Which leads me to this: a lot of times when people want me to hang out, I'll go because I'm bored. A lot of times, I can't because I have stuff I need to do. But a lot of times, like if someone were to ask me now, I just don't want to do anything with anybody. And I guess I just don't make whichever side I'm on that well-known to people, because it leads to all of this. Meh.
So in short, if you've been trying to contact me for the past few days and I've been unresponsive, it's most likely because when you tried to talk to me I just didn' want to talk to anybody. Which might last a few more days depending on how this week deals the cards. So no hard feelings, etc.
I don't know. I guess I just don't really want to talk to anybody right now.
current mood: meh. current music: Aimee Mann - It's Not/The Moth
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| Sunday, April 17th, 2005
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8:12 pm
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Hostetler wants to try something different with senior portraits this year. She wants to do some cross-processing (ie developing film in the wrong chemicals), which gives you crazy colors and wacky-looking pictures. Of course, not everyone's going to go for this, so she's going to offer it in a side package.
Thing is, she has no idea how it's going to turn out. So she elected me to "model." -_-. Tomorrow, we're going to go to Broadripple, find some grafitti, and go to town.
Only thing is, you can't really wear black when you're going to be cross-processed, and Hostetler told Mom that I have to wear color. So today we went out and bought some new shirts.
I think it was last month when I took my first step into Gap. Dad wanted a sports coat or something and I was there with him so I got dragged in. And I ended up looking at some things and putting them on my internal "That's Hot" list. Today, we bought one of the shirts that I stuck on that list. I really liked one of the other shirts, but they only had Mediums. Feh.
( Pictures )
I figured it has enough color in it for the cross-processing to do something wonky with it. I got another shirt from Aeropostale (it's white with some purple), but it's just not enough color. And Mom & I had an argument about whether to get the Large or the XL. Mom made me get the XL. Ow, my self-esteem. So of course it's too big for me. I had to deal with that aaalll day. Mom wanted me to get a Hawaiian shirt, Mom wanted me to get a shirt just because it had an embroidered penguin on it, Mom wanted me to wear polo shirts. No. I forget how we ended up cooperating, but it was like the clouds part and the angels sang. It was truly a glorious time.
But anyway. I think the orange shirt is pretty hot. It fits me perfectly. And it's a Large! Take THAT, Mom. XL. Psh. I'm thinking about just wearing it to school tomorrow as opposed to changing before I get to Broadripple, but I don't really want anyone to have a heart attack or anything, so I probably won't. But still. *licks finger, touches shoulder, sizzles* Hot.
current mood: shexxah current music: Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Maps [Head, THNX KATE]
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| Thursday, April 14th, 2005
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9:41 pm - Stuck in the Teenage Waste
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I'm still in a relatively emo mood, but I just don't really want to get into it. Reeeeally weird.
It's nearing the end of the school year, so naturally it's time to start pondering things regarding the current year, the years past, and the years to come.
I think next year I'm going to "live it up," so to speak. Which is not to say I'm going to pull a Sarah G and "LIVE!@!$#!!1" Sure, I've done a lot in the past three years. I don't really feel like I've done enough, though.
Everyone always talks about how your high school years are the "best years of your life." I can dig that. I found out a lot about myself, my friends, and everyone else. But with the good comes the bad, and there's sure as hell been a boatload of that in the past three years.
I think that at this point in my high school "career," I've worried about too much. I've constantly been thinking about what other people are thinking or what other people are saying or doing. And I've come to the conclusion that I can't do that. I can't spend another year worrying about things that don't matter.
It sort of reminds me of those lame posters they hang on the walls of classrooms that talk about how 30 years from now, it won't matter what shoes you wear or what clothes you buy. What matters are the choices you make, etc. I've always looked at that poster and thought, "How lame." But now that I think about it, it's true.
It won't matter who I talk to or who I hang out with. it won't matter what clothes I wear or how I look or what I do. No one's going to care about it and no one's going to remember it. No ones going to remember my "trademark" bracelets, no one's going to remember the band shirts I wore or the stupid things I said or did. That doesn't matter.
What does matter is living life to its fullest. Taking advantage of the situation. Carpe diem and all that. All that stuff that I used to think was just inspirational bullshit is starting to take on meaning with me.
There's so much that I've done since I stepped foot in Lawrence North, but there's also so much that I haven't done. There are so many truly awesome people that I've met, but there are also so many people I haven't met.
And I'm not saying that I'm going to ditch my friends and find new ones or throw away all my clothes and buy new ones because it "doesn't matter." I'm just saying that I'm not going to be Lame Play-It-Safe Greg next year. I'm sure he'll still be in there somewhere, but he won't emerge as much as he has this year.
I'm not going to worry about my mom working at my school. I'm not going to worry about what everyone else thinks. I'm not going to worry about all the stupid things I worry about now.
Instead, I'm going to worry think about what matters. I'm going to have fun. I'm going to be proud of my high school years, even if I only came out of my proverbial shell at Senior year. I'm going to get over all my teen angst drama bullshit. I'm going to take the weight off of my own shoulders. I'm going to stop dwelling over the little things. I'm going to ignore what other people say or do or think or feel or make me feel or make me do or think or say or act.
We never thought that we'd get caught up Stuck in the teenage waste As we explode...
current mood: determined current music: Poe - Hello [Single Mix]
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5:22 pm
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( Boredom and thus Stevie drawings ) I wish I could draw faces. And hands. And draw, in general.
In other news, I'm in a generally "emotive" mood right now. Maybe I'll post about it later. I don't know.
current mood: emotive current music: Kittie - In Winter
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| Sunday, April 10th, 2005
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9:18 pm - Pictures
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6:33 pm - Spring Cleaning
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Since meadowsoprano was cleaning today, I got an urge to clean up my room a little. After thinking about it some more, I decided to just rearrange it and clean it at the same time.
I moved down here about a week before 8th grade started, and nothing in here has changed since. The furniture, the paint, the location of the furniture -- I never changed it. I put some posters and stuff up, but that's about it. So I figured that it was time for a change.
My computer's on the opposite side of the room now, my dresser's right next to me. I took down the posters on the wall that used to be next to my bed (that's where the computer is now) and hanged my horizontal Tusk poster in place of the vertical Behind The Mask one. I look up and see them goofing off in 1979. Awww.
The computer was the most horrendous thing. My God. I was afraid to see what was behind it and all. I thought I'd get ambushed by spiders or something. Not quite. There was, like, a colony of mold. I think I might have had a small heart attack. It was so frightening. I told Dad and he gave me some orange cleaner and tol dme to spray it on the wall and rub it with some paper towels. A bit of the paint came off, but along with the paint came the mold. There's still a little bit, but I've done about all I could to.
My bed's behind me under the window, and the random table that was under the window is now next to my dresser on the wall to my right.
That was a little confusing. I'll post pictures later.
current mood: busy current music: Olive - Trickle
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| Monday, April 4th, 2005
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1:58 pm
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First day back, first day back. Lame as ever.
I'm signed up to be Hosty's assistant next year, but I just need some more signatures on it. Bordner's starting to hound me so I need to get it done with soon.
Hosty has a friend who owns a landscaping business (I guess you'd call it that, I'm not sure, since I'm assuming it's a one-man thing), and she's trying to push him into the Age of Technology. More specifically, she wants him to get a website. I had told Hosty a few months ago that I've built websites for.. a while. I think it's been 5 years now? Anyway, she remembered and she wants me to try and help push him to do it.
I'm not sure how I feel about pushing him, because I'm not really the type of person who will try to persuade someone to do what they don't want to do. But whatev.
Hosty wants me to ask for $100-$400 for it (for graphics, pages, upkeep, etc). Which I'm also unsure about. That's a lot of money. I'd rather do it for free, since it's really not a big deal for me, but... it's money, you know? And I currently have none. And I'd like to have somewhat of a "job."
Eeeh. Opinions? I'd really like to do it, but I'm not sure about charging and if I do decide to charge, I'm not sure what my asking price should be. I guess I'll look at some websites for web designers and see what they ask. I don't know.
I also applied for Borders the other day, and I'm working on an application for Half-Price Books. If either of those palces dig me enough and decide to hire me, it'll start over summer since I don't know if I'd be able to handle a job while in school at this point.
current mood: eeeh current music: People talking
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| Saturday, April 2nd, 2005
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8:05 pm - Haunted: An Explanation.
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I posted this on the Ledge a while back. It helps to explain why I identify with Poe's "Haunted" so much. It's really long, and I'm really only posting it here so I can have it somewhere in the event the thread at the Ledge disappears.
( Haunted )
current music: The Creatures - Exterminating Angel
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| Wednesday, March 30th, 2005
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2:31 pm - Spring Break Shakedown
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So Spring Break's about half over, and I haven't done a single thing. I have a bunch of stuff that's due in school, like the Surrealism project in Photography or the Manhattan Project presentation in History or the lame invention thing in Theory Of Knowledge. I don't know why I'm worrying so much about it, since I still have a while to do everything, but... egh. It's just hard to do work when you're on a break. Even though I took my roll of film yesterday. I can't wait to get it developed. I miss the darkroom. Awrrr.
Friday, the first day of break, I ended up going to Broad Ripple with Natalie and Lindsay, which was pretty fun. They're both hilarious, even moreso when they're together. Good times were had, even though we just walked around a bunch. I went to Indy CD & Vinyl to get my Siouxsie fix and got The Scream and Peepshow, which I think is my favorite album of theirs so far. That brings my total up to four. I'm almost done! Tear, tear, saliva.
Mom and Sara are coming back from Cancun today (tonight, rather). Sara tried to pull a fast one on my by telling me they lost my digital camera. Which didn't really phase me, since I'd be fine if I got a new one. The one I have now always takes grainy pictures. It's sort of the equivalent of pushing ISO 400 film up to 1600 in a manual camera, sans all the contrast plusses. You just get more grain. And plus, it eats batteries like nobody's business.
I think Charissa's still mad at me. Which is a bummer and all, but I think she's taking it far more seriously than she should be. Yeah, I probably shouldn't have said what I said, but contrary to what she's saying, I don't think I call her that stuff all the time. So really, I've been trying to avoid the situation because I don't know how to handle it. I'd like to talk it out, but we've already made our sides known and there's not much grey area. So I have no idea what to do now. Feh.
Yeah. I wish I could go somewhere today, like Broad Ripple or something. It's amazing outside. I haven't had the opportunity to leave my bedroom window open in a long time, so I'm jumping at the chance now. Mom and Sara picked the wrong days to go to Cancun, because it really is beautiful up here.
current mood: lazy current music: My Ruin - June 10th
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| Tuesday, March 29th, 2005
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3:39 am - Whew.
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So it's finished. The header took me the longest, because I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do with it. I actually have two headers - both exactly the same, aside from the fact that one has a slight tint of color from a gradient. I can't really decide which one I like better, so I guess I'll switch them up at random.
Yayyy, Opal. Sheebus, I'm tired.
current mood: tired current music: Siouxsie & The Banshees - Face To Face
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| Monday, March 28th, 2005
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7:38 pm
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I think I'm going to change the style of my journal. Just a friendly notice to excuse the dust while I figure something out.
In other news, nothing much has been going on over here. Mom & Sara are in Cancun, so I'm stuck here with Dad, where I've been being quite domestic. I'm doing laundry (only mine, thank God), putting things in the oven, running the washing machine. I don't really mind it, but it'd be nice if Dad would do something. He decided to paint some walls and fix some water damage on the ceiling, though, so whatev.
I've also managed to piss off Charissa. Go me? It's not something I'm proud about, but I just think it's all sort of ridiculous. *shrug*
current mood: okay current music: Olive - Smile
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| Friday, March 25th, 2005
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5:36 pm
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Just so y'all know, if I'm ever out & about, you'll know by seeing the little cellphone by my screenname on your Buddy Lists[s]. I only use Mobile IM when I'm out around town. Feel free to IM me, just not much, since my Dad would have a massive heart attack.
Since I'm not going to be doing anything over Spring Break, my days will probably be spent online, out with friends, or reading The Fountainhead. I know, my life is so interesting and cool. You all want to be just like me, I'm sure.
Mom doesn't understand why I like to go out with friends so much. I asked her if she ever went out when she was my age and she said that she didn't because she had a job. Which is when she started trying to push the prospect of me getting a job on me. I think that if I get a job, it'll be at Borders or Barnes & Noble. I'd work at Cord Camera or something, but I'm not sure about that.
I really do want a job, if only so I wouldn't have to rely on my parents for money anymore. That'd be really nice.
Anyway, this was pretty pointless. I haven't been updating as regularly as I used to, so I figured I'd type something up real quick. Yep.
current mood: bored current music: Siouxsie & Co - Jigsaw Feeling [Head]
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| Friday, March 18th, 2005
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5:42 pm - The Letter
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I'm often referred to as a veritable encyclopedia of useless Spice Girls information, seeing as though my sister was a huge fan of theirs and I sort of absorbed information about them through osmosis while she rode the wave of Girl Power, equalization between the sexes, etc.
In fact, one could say that I myself was a bit of a Spice Girls fan.
So imagine my interest when I saw the front page of the March 18 issue of The North Star. Imagine also my disappointment in seeing the amount of errors made regarding the post-Spice career of the five ladies who were part of the biggest girl group in pop music. I am writing this letter to correct your mistakes.
First, let's begin with Victoria Adams-Beckham, or “Posh Spice.” You failed to mention that she released a solo album of her own (“Victoria Beckham”) in 2001. While it never really sold much, it spawned a few decent singles. Of course, we never got to hear them in the United States because the Spice Girls (and therefore their solo projects) don't really have a market after the proverbial glitter faded. She wrote an autobiography called Learning To Fly, which is to be released in May of this year, according to Amazon.com (however, it's English counterpart reports that it is already available overseas).
On to Melanie Chisholm (“Sporty Spice”), whose name you misspelled. “Northern Star,” released in 1999, is not her only album, as your article would lead one to think. She is no longer releasing singles or making videos for it. Perhaps you are referring to her 2003 release, “Reason,” which also isn't available in the United States but is available as an import through Amazon.com (just like the other solo Spice Girls albums that aren't available here). Even then, however, she is no longer making music videos or releasing singles from that album. She is at work on a third album (“Beautiful Intentions,” to be released in England in April of this year) and is also considering writing a musical of her life. She has reportedly collaborated with Franz Ferdinand to write songs for their new album.
Emma Bunton (“Baby Spice”), who has made a bit of a splash in the United States with her latest album, “Free Me,” has released a solo album before called “A Girl Like Me” in 2001, which went unmentioned in your article. Aside from that, she hasn't done much since the Spice Girls disbanded in 2001.
Melanie Brown, or “Scary Spice” if you prefer, has not been staying out of the public eye as you stated in your article. While she doesn't have the same amount of exposure now as she did then, she has remained active. Her 2000 album, “Hot,” failed to generate an impressive amount of sales, leading to her getting dropped from the label it was released on. Since, she has worked as a host on British television and most recently played the role of Mimi in the Broadway production of “Rent” just last year. Melanie B is reportedly working on a new album, a few roles in movies, and a tell-all book about the Spice Girls.
Geri Halliwell (“Ginger” or “Sexy Spice”) has had arguably the most successful career after her departure from the group in 1998, just before they kicked off their “Spice World” world tour that rolled through Indiana. Contrary to your article, Geri has only released two albums – 1999's “Schizophonic” and 2001's “Scream If You Wanna Go Faster.” She is about to release a third album, titled simply “Geri.” The “two autobiographies” you mention, 1999's If Only and 2003's Just For The Record aren't necessarily two separate autobiographies. Just For The Record is simply a “Part Two.”
As you can see, a few missteps were made in the published article – all of which could have been fixed by doing a simple check on Amazon or by visiting a few fan websites' news sections.
The Encyclopedia of Spice, Greg H-----
Let me know if I have any wrong information in it or if I should add anything. :)
Eh. I'm not going to submit it. Sorry guys.
current music: Stevie - Thousand Days
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