When it's actually constructive criticism.

( Annoying ad tag. =/ )

Less annoying link to RPG Concrit Meme


Can't wait for the anon meme to die.

And now? Tons of actual work to do.

As the keeper of poly's overall census, I understand where the perception lies that we're having massive numbers of people leaving.

We aren't.

We have had some people drop the game altogether, yes. It happens, and I will miss several of them, but we are not a cult, guys. People are allowed to leave, to play in other games, and to have lives.

But there aren't as many as you think. We have, however, had many people culling out their inactive characters, the characters for which they no longer have a feel, and characters they just thought they could play and couldn't.

Hello? This is a good thing, right?

So here's the numbers:
In February, poly topped 200 players. Go us!
We have topped out at 222 players around July. Go us! (middle of summer vacation anyone?)
Today, October 7, we have 215 players. Go us! (back to school has made people assess priorities anyone?)

Here's our mass exodus:
We topped out at around 620 characters.
Today, October 7, we have 553 characters. (in the interest of full disclosure, I'll admit that some of those additions are sitting in my inbox with the glaring red "poly in need of update" tag I use to keep organized)

There's the mass exodus, guys, and I've contributed to it as much as many people with my three drops in the past two weeks. It's not in players, though we have lost some, and we have lost some of those recently; it's in the drops of extra characters, and if dropping dead character weight is a bad thing? Shit, stop bitching at me, because tomorrow you'll be bitching about the person who's character squatting.

---

Drops by the numbers:
1/31 - 2/29 134 drops
2/29 - 4/7 121 drops
4/7 - 5/7 93 drops
5/7 - 6/2 67 drops
6/2 - 7/6 96 drops
7/6 - 8/9 130 drops
8/9 - 9/7 101 drops
9/7 - 10/7 144 drops

Yes, I track this shit. Funny, huh? I'm not sure whether to blame my sociology background or my biology future.

Lafayette, you are too damned fabulous.

Even if you're a V-dealing asshole.

With the return of the blight that is the RP Anon meme, I want you all to know that you do have my support.

I understand needing to vent. I do. I do not understand needing to wound.

If there's anything I can do. Anything I can listen to. Anything I can help with, please contact me. AIM/YIM/email/messaging/any of the mod contacts. Name it.

That RP status meme.

( Walter Dornez )

( Pup )

( Bob )

( Crowley )

( Armand )

My boss from 1992 wanted to have a talk with me about the work I'm doing now. I came over to sit on the couch with him going, "Oh no. No. Don't tell me that you're cutting my hours again. I can't take another cut." To which he replied, "Of course not."

Then he looked over to his boss on the other end of the couch, who mumbled, "We just want you to re-take the SAT."

...

Yeah. I was incredulous. Even in a dream. "But I already have a degree! It was over 20 years ago! My scores were great! Whhhhhy?!"

I was also in the bottom floor of a hotel and as I rode the escalator upstairs (jump cut, continuity is for losers) to wake up Pat and an unnamed friend, I received a phone call from some little old church lady who was somehow also my boss, wanting to know why I wasn't online to talk to her about some project issues. I babbled excuses and went to wake up Pat and whoever the other guy was.

I was interrupted in talking to them about my annoyance with the SAT, by my boss' boss in something that I can best describe as a Tachikoma.

In the hotel room.

Wanting to harass me about not being online and working.

I told him that I had to take another unnamed friend to the doctor and we somehow ended up in a discussion of women's reproductive rights. Okay, it was an argument.

With my boss' boss. In a Tachikoma.

Then he chased me out of the room, I ran down the up escalator, and when I jumped over the side, thinking that I'd jump about a floor, I realized I was jumping into open space, fell about four stories (give or take, dreams'll do that,) hit the bottom, lay there for a minute in pain, and then woke up with my heart pounding, panting, and unable to lay my head back on the pillow for fear of visions of Tachikomas.

Fucking SATs.

CAKETOWN!

I had delicious, delicious cake yesterday. I've been wanting cake for ages, but have denied myself because, hey, diet. Yesterday my scale told me that I'd hit my goal for giving myself a cake-y treat, but I don't count reports from my scale except for the ones on Friday morning. You know how it goes, your weight fluctuates, etc. So I just take the results once a week.

So, this week's official result, I've lost 4.4 pounds since last Friday (wtf? I aim for two a week as a healthy goal, but I am NOT complaining) bringing me up to a total since mid-July of 22 pounds.

I earned my freaking cake.

I'm ordering a folding exercise bike and some hand weights today to reward myself. Cake and exercise equipment. Oh yeah. At least I know my priorities. ^.~

It has been WAY TOO LONG since the last time I watched Venture Brothers.

Brock was trained by freaking Hunter Thompson? Life is good.

I went ahead and dropped Morn and put in an app for Armand. I am now looking to my enablers for their follow-through. ^.~

( Rambling about Anne Rice and audio books )

Bob: Doesn't bother with an inner monologue most of the time anyway.
Pup: Is all outer monologue.
Morn: I think I'm going to drop her. Her inner monologue wouldn't be a good one anyway. With both Cal and Vicious, the two people she's made the most connection with, gone, she's going to be so unhappy.
Crowley: Is logging with Sam from Reaper with the curse hitting them while they're at the bar. He may post tomorrow, but I don't want to give too much away without checking with Aziraphale's player.
Walter: I'll post for him tomorrow. I think Tony wants a go at him when he can't conceal anything. Depending upon who he talks to, it could be very, very awkward for him.

With dropping Morn, I'm also considering picking up another character thanks to the enablement of a couple of other players. I do have a lot of canon to refresh myself on and I don't expect to have my app in before this app week closes. Before the next app week opens, though...?


( And because maundering about losing weight is really only interesting to me... )

I'm using an interim layout, since LJ kindly ate the one I was using and liked.

When I start playing literati.

Feh.

( Cooking )

Okay, unrelated to yummy food...

I'm going to give NaNoWriMo a shot this year. I have something in mind. That's a helluva lot of typing to be done in one month, but hey, it's worth a try.

I really should finish up some of my fanfic WIPs before then. I'm not holding my breath, but I do want to. I go to sleep thinking about where I'm going with them, but wake up without much any motivation to write. What happened to the day of writing every single day? Feh.

I slept in this morning, which was odd. Starting at 7:00 a.m. I kept waking up to look at the clock. "Nope, not time to wake up yet.Zzz." "Is it time yet? No. Zzz."

I look back and I wonder at how this journal has morphed from something wholly fannish into something mostly personal and/or RP-related. I still enjoy Hellsing and the upcoming end of the manga series is a bittersweet kind of thing, but I came to really hate participating in the fandom aspect of it outside of RP.

Ah well. I've had this journal for nearly four years (it marks the earliest part of my participation in fandom, although my ff.net account's creation date really pinpoints when fandom first hooked me) and a lot of my life has changed in that time. I may not write every day, but I'm also no longer in the grips of clinical depression. I may not talk about fandom as much, but I'm very involved with a large LJ RP. I may talk about my personal life a lot more, but that would be because I have one again.

I expect the upcoming year will bring more changes in my journal's direction. Going back to school and the kind of courseload I anticipate carrying will make a difference in my life and focus.

It's been an interesting ride so far.

Do you think they'd accept Rincewind?

Yeah, okay, so I've been going heavy on the crack, but Mr. Potatosexual in sex or die land amuses me.

As of Monday, I'm taking a 20% cut in hours, most of the other PAs are taking a 35% cut, the PMs are taking a 25% cut. (PA = Production Artist, PM = Project Manager)

I expect to see some people quitting soon. I think our manager does, too.

The cuts are in effect for the foreseeable future, meaning not just for the remainder of this quarter (where we're $50k in the red with the cuts) but into next quarter as well.

Still, I still have a job, and while that does impact my budget, it doesn't impact my ability to pay my bills or feed myself and Ford, nor will it interfere with my returning to school in the Spring.

I wonder if I should spring for a massage tomorrow to work the stress tension out of my shoulder.

Why yes, my conservative neighbors, it was nice of you to invite Ford and me to join you for some barbecue. Thanks very much. That was the most meat I've eaten in 14 pounds.

Yes, thanks for the beer, too. I was really in the mood for one.

Why no, thank you, I'd rather not discuss politics with you over my meal.

No. Really.

Oh, so you want to suck me in by asking my opinion of the cynically-chosen, underqualified, ethically-questionable, female vice-presidential candidate?

Well, I did warn you, didn't I?

Dolts.
_____

Yeah, my mood continues unabated. The work stuff will be resolved one way or another in our 10:00 a.m. meeting. We'll see how that goes.

Dandy was stung by a bee yesterday, so I spent most of yesterday being more paranoid than the sting probably warranted. Her front right paw is a bit swollen today, but she doesn't seem uncomfortable and she's been playful.

Work is a little stressing me out. The work itself is no stress. The business unit budget is big stress. Combined with the shitcanned economy and I'm feeling very tense about work and money.

Other annoying stuff, like my work laptop dock suddenly getting locked and my not having a key. Long story, makes no sense, I'm frustrated by it.

I had a great time... no, a fantastic time playing Crowley with Aziraphale earlier today. Would that happen in canon? Hell no, since gender is something both Crowley and Aziraphale have to make an effort to really have, but in poly? Tickled me endlessly.

So that was a good thing.

Bad things: too much caffeine jitters, headache, inability to take a nap when I really wanted one, locked laptop dock, request from my boss for all of us to volunteer to cut our hours or some of us are being told to take two weeks off unpaid, the financial crash happening on Wall Street and in the banking industry, my college application's crap, etc.

Good things: leftover quiche, working at home tomorrow, the joys of fall weather.

Overall result: still grumpy, and for that I offer preemptive apologies to some people.

Fandom: Hellsing
Theme Set: Seventh
Rating: G to R
Characters: Almost all of them

( 50 sentences for 50 themes )

[And was my icon not prescient even if I really didn't want "She" to be Mina? XD ]

( Phear me )

And this, then, goes perfectly:
Pass a Secret Note ✘ Meme

The quiche doesn't suck. In fact, with the sauce I made with the excess tomatoes? It's fucking great.

For the rest of you, the background is that I spent a bit of time this morning going, "I hope this quiche doesn't suck" to Ruxi. The tomatoes and basil that I got from the woman I work with a few days ago had to be used before they went bad, so I whipped up an extremely low fat version of this tomato basil quiche recipe. I was a little dubious, since I used fat free egg substitute for 8 of the 12 eggs, nonfat cottage cheese, and soy cheddar, thus reducing the fat content to something virtually negligible.

But the first mini ones have come out of the oven (I made a dozen mini quiches in cupcake pans and one big quiche) and they're quite good.

Also, with the remaining tomatoes and basil, I threw together a thick sauce with them, minced garlic, and red wine, reducing it down to something the consistency of jam. Spreading some of that on a mini quiche worked out really well to add a bit more flavor and interest to it.

Yeah, yeah, food maundering. I don't actually cook often at all. More often, I just assemble, which really isn't at all the same.


Unrelated, I picked up a Hellsing claim at 1fandom yesterday. Blame Ruxi for that, too. I have 33 44 of 50 prompts written. At this rate, I may finish them all by the time the mod approves my claim. XD

But I'm going to do it sort of. And excuse myself by saying that it's not exactly my post? Aziraphale's player picked an inspired song for today's musical theater curse and it gives me a happy.

It's Guy Love between two guys.

When you see this, post a Douglas Adams quote in your journal.

"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."

My cube is currently filled with the lush fragrance of basil. One of the women from my group brought in fresh tomatoes and basil from her garden, and I leapt at the opportunity to take some. I adore basil both for flavor and aroma.

Now I just need to find a suitable recipe to highlight such a treat.

We had a fire alarm go off here at work earlier. It seems to have not been a drill, based on the number of fire trucks that showed up, but hundreds of people streamed out of the building and into the emergency gathering point, chattering and laughing.

We were eventually allowed back in, and other than the fact that one of the servers I need for my work is down, you couldn't tell that there had been anything odd going on.

The timing is peculiar. Some of the gathering chatter turned to today's anniversary, but that was inevitable.

I could talk about the anniversary. It's burned into my memory the way that prior generations remembered Kennedy's assassination. I did talk about it with Ford, earlier, on his walk to school.

But what is there to say? I remember the day more clearly than almost any other in my life, but I've told the "Where was I" story enough times already. I remember it the way I remember the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake I was a student at UC Santa Cruz at the time - my university was less than 20 miles from the epicenter.

I'll take the earthquake.

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remove scienceshow friend remove bigasswrench friend remove faustianfishman friend remove tadano friend remove shark_whisperer friend remove heyheyheyheeey friend remove e_for_short friend remove madame_harker friend remove dune_messiah friend remove virginia_potts friend remove the_bastard_ds friend remove urhumblevassal friend remove rockstar_otouto friend remove pinkikemenhero friend remove first_mommy friend remove antiakuma friend remove chrysopoeia friend remove halffaced friend remove jennyration friend remove 1stfallen friend remove noflatterer friend remove mafiaphobic friend remove ego_itsuki friend remove 3redeyes friend remove andwatchitfall friend remove asmileintherain friend remove winged_hubris friend remove withinthemist friend remove henry_west friend remove birdpungoeshere friend remove blue_eyephoenix friend remove cats_0n_mars friend remove channels_marx friend remove infidel_calypso friend remove jesus_was_wr0ng friend remove dandy_indeed friend remove endlesscheers friend remove flash_minato friend remove foxy_physician friend remove makelectricfire friend remove oneeyedhorror friend remove onetruejustice friend remove ordenmagier friend remove givemethemap friend remove itsafiction friend remove silk_in_ebony friend remove worldlike friend remove contractorly friend remove fraking_nugget friend remove heroinbrand friend remove hundredfaces friend remove hungrylike friend remove infrangible friend remove pulledtolife friend remove invisible_anita friend remove kittykbblknight friend remove leftshoeget friend remove jesus_yamato friend remove haaaahahahahaha friend remove spiralmessenger friend remove commodoresmoker friend remove makeitpossible friend remove nin_nin_nin friend remove hasitsthorns friend remove theyseemebattin friend remove 20trinkets friend remove fangirlistic friend remove ohrosalita

I'm cleaning up my poly character flist and I know that I don't remove characters most of the time when they drop, which can be a real PITA. These are pulled from the character remove spreadsheet I started maintaining back in April. So these are all drops from the past five months or so. (Yeah, there are a lot, we're a fickle lot in this game, eh?)

If anyone else wants to make use of it, have at it. You can use paste the list into the Admin Console and have all those characters removed auto-magically. If they're already off your flist, the console just removes those who are still there.

I'm currently fully updating Walter's flist, so I can afford to do the full remove and then re-add crap.

So, after seeing my name pop up in a bunch of places with this 30 questions meme, I sort of had to do it just to find out what the damned questions were.

So here we go.

1. There are 30 questions.
2. Next to each number, write only the name of the person who fits.
3. Answer one question with one name. As Bon said, "Screw that."
4. Don't tell the questions to anyone who isn't doing the meme.

( 30 Questions )

Dragon*Con was... wonderful! The costumes were amazing not always in good ways but mostly. The Mad Scientist Dance was a lot of fun with music provided by singing tesla coils. There was drinking. There was drinking of absinthe tastes like NyQuil. (I'll see about bringing some of comparable quality next year, Mish, since that stuff's pricy and you shouldn't be the only one buying.) There were wonderful, wonderful people - some familiar faces, some new ones. There was better organization than last year (although not perfect, since we only got to see Voltaire sing one song before he was shut down as a fire hazard yes, ladies and gentlemen, he's just that hot.) I donated blood while wearing a corset.

Ah yes, corsets. I brought the neo-Victorian stuff I've been accumulating and I wore it and quite enjoyed it. I've never had my picture taken at a con before, but that's understandable, since I never dressed up before, either. This time around, I had my picture taken several times. One time for a collection of pictures that the photographer said she was going to send to Abney Park.

I'll clearly need a new, smaller corset soon, since I'm back to watching what I eat now that the con's over, and Mish was able to get my leather corset fully closed. I refuse to look at the scale for a few days. Mm... pizza. Mm... corset removal is nigh orgasmic after hours and hours of walking around in one, btw.

Daniel took pictures with my camera (thanks, Daniel!) so I'll need to get those off soon and share them. (I know. I know. I'm lame about actually doing that in a timely fashion. I think I still owe AX pics.)

I know there's more, but it is rather late. I could bitch about US Air and how much they suck, and how much the getting to Atlanta and actually getting to the con sucked, but really, the good so far outweighed the bad that I'll just restrict myself to saying, DO NOT USE US AIR - THEY SUCK!

Con was good. People were great. I'm glad to be home, but I wish I didn't have to wait a year to do this particular con again.

And now? Sleeeeep.

Yep, today I'm off for Atlanta. Yesterday was spectacularly bad in a RL sense, and I'm grateful for vacation time now.

I'll have hours in the airport later, so I'm putting myself on the love meme and will go spread some love when I get there. And update spreadsheets, tables, and other mod maintenance.

I'll see about more details and some less crabby stuff in this journal,too.

THE RP LOVE MEME

FUCK YOU

Not locked. Not filtered. Not fucking anything.

Come on by. I don't care. And yes, I'm looking at a few of you in particular who lack the stones to just flat out say what you want without hiding behind anonymity. Fuck you.

You're afraid of grudgewank? Why? Is someone going to come through the screen and hit you? Kill your cat? Flay your grandma?

No.

You're just cowards.

[Anon should make kink, not wank.]

That's been my byword since I came of voting age. I fail to understand how people can be part of a group, have a vested interest in a group, yet when an opportunity comes to voice an opinion, they opt out.

You can't be an oppressed minority if you don't even participate when you can. You lose your credibility. XD

Tickets are booked. Travel plans are fucking nuts. Seriously.

My budget for this con will be tighter than for most cons I attend. That would be because I spent probably way too much money on clothes, corsets, a wig, a hat, jewelry and accessories and pretty much everything except the boots. I have a pair of boots that I have owned and loved for the past eighteen years and which will go well with the bustle skirt, the riding pants, and the more casual steampunk-y outfit that I have.

I will be dying every time we go outside.

I promise pictures.

I'm not positive how I'm going to travel with the hat. It's... well, it's a dressage hat with a long tail of lace. It's a bit big to fit in my suitcase and the lace makes it a pain in the ass to just wear while traveling.

I have lost ten pounds. I've been just focusing on eating low fat (20g or less in a day) and trying to keep my calorie intake around 1200 calories. I focus more on the fat than the calories, though, and I don't beat myself up if I have a day when I don't meet either goal. I can't remember exactly when I started - two or three weeks after AX? So five or six weeks ago? I am so totally not complaining about my success. I have a long way to go, but the first ten pounds shows me that I'm definitely able to do it, all I have to do is exercise a bit of self-discipline. Clothes are fitting better, even jewelry is fitting differently, and a belt I bought for my Dragon stuff is now able to sit down on my hips instead of fitting around the narrowest part of my waist.

I have five more months before school starts for me. If I can maintain this sort of discipline, I can hope to lose thirty or even forty more pounds by then. That's been a huge part of my motivation. I'm going to be the "old one" in class as it is. I don't need the additional self-consciousness that my body image issues bring.

And if I have to buy a whole new wardrobe? Awww daaaarn. XD

So that's one aspect of self-perception that I'm working on. Another aspect that I'm working on is my perception of myself as a grumpy person.

I will grant you that I do a fair bit of griping here in my journal, but that would be because this is an appropriate venue.

But I recently mentioned to one of my co-workers something along the lines of "Yeah, even if I am so grumpy all the time."

His response was, "You? Grumpy? You're always smiling."

And I realized, Huh, I do smile a lot at work and I do have a very positive attitude about my work and co-workers, and okay, yes, my inner monologue can be a bit bitchy at times, but I'm not nearly as grumpy as I think I am.

So I'm working on that. 2008 has been decent and has been setting the stage for 2009, which I hope will be excellent.

ETA: Eh, what the hell?

『THEVILLAINMEME』

You'll see what happens when everyone else does.

No, it wasn't Eden.

good_rpers_rock has a meme going right now. Go, do it. It's cool and positive reinforcement is sadly overlooked a lot of the time.

The meme, (do it there so everyone can see) is

Name a handful of people you RP with, read, or have heard of. Say something positive, a reason why you like their characters, or the players. Anything that is constructive, positive, and better than the general: <3!!

My lovin can be found [here].