So I found a nice little e-mail in my student in-box today informing me that I did not receive the scholarship that I interviewed for. To offset the sting of rejection, the scholarship committee invited me to apply for a different, lesser scholarship that they also oversee. However, I have to submit an application packet for this new scholarship by Friday.

For those of you not keeping track, today is WEDNESDAY. And I have to work 11-hour days every day between now and then.

Plus I have no idea how to go about writing a "letter of financial need." What is the hell is that? Should it be a perfunctory listing of the dry financial facts? Or should it be a flowery sob story begging for money? What is and is not okay to include?

Fact: There are millions of people out there falling over themselves to give you advice on how to write essays for scholarships and college applications, but I can't find so much as one -- uno -- sample letter for stating financial need on the whole of Interwebs.

How is that even possible?

The Good

A few weeks ago I attempted to write a usable scholarship essay with next to no guidance whatsoever from the people giving out said scholarship. No question, no theme, no length requirement. Basically, my one line of instructions amounted to "write something that demonstrates your commitment to library service and your sense of humor." The end result is probably the worst essay I've ever crapped out, but I submitted it anyway.

Now I've been told that I'm one of the 3-4 candidates who get to interview for the scholarship. The best part is, I have no idea how much the scholarship is even for. They never said that either. After all this trouble, if it turns out to be $50 I' going to be pissed.

The Bad

My job at the University is not going spectacularly. At least I'm not in trouble or anything, but things get progressively more uncomfortable for me every day I work there it seems. I've been feeling like a mean bitch recently because they hired this new lady as my counterpart, and she just hasn't been picking up on what we're supposed to do very quickly. I keep having to correct her all the time, which feels weird because I'm not her boss or anything. I've just been there a couple months longer.

And today they took my desk away from me. I had been parked comfortably in the anteroom of the library director's office, which meant that I had a decent-sized workspace, a window (which I sometimes credit with preserving my sanity thus far), and a door that I could close if the director was out of the office for the day so that I could play music. But the director just got ousted from her office by some academic bigshot or other, and his secretary just inherited my spot as a result. Now I don't have a workspace of my own at all; I just have to float around to other people's desks according to who is not at work when I happen to be there.

If they take my stapler away, I swear I'm going to burn that whole place down.

The Ugly

Tim is going through a traumatic family crisis of EPIC proportions right now. And it's even epic by my standards. Because it's not my own crisis, I don't feel comfortable elaborating, but suffice to say, it's really big, it's really appalling and it's really expensive.

Maybe one of the reasons Tim and I deal well with each other is because we are both all too familiar with the sorts of events that most other people consider surreal.

so i text while i drive...so what? i'm alive...

As if I needed any more evidence to support my deep-seated belief that cell phone texting is ruining everything ever. I really wish I was the kind of person who would pray that these kids stay safe but I'm actually the kind of person who hopes that they all smash head-on into trees and/or retaining walls.

Wanted has both magic fu and Morgan Freeman. So naturally I arrived at the theater this morning prepared to have my ass kicked, even though apparently I didn't look it since the lobby attendant felt the need to make me verbally confirm that I actually paid to see Wanted and wasn't the victim of some sort of ticketing mix-up. Ultimately, I feel a trifle let down.

It wasn't nearly as mindless as a lot of the reviews I've read have made it out to be, but they didn't really have all their plot ducks in a row either. James McAvoy gives this stellar performance that totally carries the entire movie, but nobody else is really given much chance to flesh out their characters. Which is especially disappointing in regards to Angelia Jolie. The makers delivered on the stylish action promised to me, but sometimes at the expense of my willingness to follow their defiantly screwy logic wherever it would take me.

Segments of the film had me completely enthralled, particularly the beginning third. But right around the time McAvoy gets his assassin act together, the film starts to run in fits and starts. I'd be totally on board for a while, and then all of a sudden they've lost me. Repeat vicious cycle through to the credits. I sense massive amounts of wasted potential, but there's enough good here that I can envision myself liking it better on repeat viewings.

I saw Hancock last night, too. It's better than Wanted but so far it's received far harsher and more unfair (in my opinion) criticism. To describe my thoughts on Hancock any further would require a spoiler cut, and I'm just feeling too lazy for that right now. So I liked it. The end.

Tim and I spent most of yesterday schlubbing around the house, channel surfing from one disposable TV marathon to the next. The funny part is, this isn't even the first time we've wasted a July 4th by watching multiple episodes of To Catch a Predator. I really don't know what's so American about schadenfreude.

We did go out at night to watch the big DC fireworks, although we didn't brave the Mall itself. Instead we drove to Ft. Myer and sat on the grass at back of the base facing towards the mall. So we had a pretty good view of the display from the opposite side. The only problem was that the atmospheric conditions last night caused all the smoke from the fireworks to just clump together into this increasingly large, viscous cloud that obstructed the view of half of the display from where we were sitting.

Even so, I had a really good time. Somehow it just all seemed really appropriate. Spending my Fourth sitting on the ground cuddled up next to Tim. Surrounded by a crowd of Army folk. Wearing a camouflage raincoat that Tim had fished out of his trunk to protect me from the wet night. Watching fireworks go off between the Washington Monument and the Capitol, the explosions reflecting multi-colored light off the clouds.

And then after we came home, we ate take-out and watched the live coverage of the display on the Travel Channel that we had DVRed just in case.

So far:

Lincoln Memorial
Washington Monument
National Mall
WWII Memorial
Jefferson Memorial
FDR Memorial
Cherry Blossoms
Smithsonian Air & Space Museum
Smithsonian Natural History Museum
The National Zoo

**New: The United States Holocaust Memorial Museum

A few weeks ago, knowing that the start my new job was imminent, I decided to spend one of my remaining free weekday afternoons visiting the Holocaust Museum. I didn't even try to convince anyone else to come with me. I figured I was the only person I know who would volunteer to waste a perfectly lovely summer day on a joyless obligation. That said, once I got there the museum was surprisingly packed with tourists.

I'm not sure why I felt such a strong desire to visit this museum. But as soon as I found out it was there, inexplicably it moved to the top of the list of stuff I had to see before we move away from Washington. Even after the fact, I still can't really decipher my own motivation. I'm not sure sure it's accurate to say I'm glad I went, but I do feel a weird satisfaction.

There. I did that. Moving on. Except that an entire day spent meditating on the human capacity for evil is not an easy thing to move on from.

However, I wasn't as overwrought by the experience as I thought I'd be. Of course, it was sad to see video of the extermination camps' liberation or to walk through and touch an actual railroad car that transported Jews and others to the camps, but the only time I came close to crying was at the very end. Once you've finished walking through the entire permanent exhibition, there's a small amphitheater where you can sit for as long as you like and watch video of oral histories from Holocaust survivors. Watching a very old woman speak of being separated from her sister so long ago and how she'll never know for sure what happened to her, or even if she's still alive somewhere or died years before... that got to me.

I also walked through a special exhibition on the 1936 Olympics in Berlin, which was interesting, I guess. It certainly seemed timely since the debate to boycott or not mirrored the one we've recently had about the Beijing Olympics.

But I was more fascinated by the exhibition regarding the current situation in Darfur. The exhibition is small, but packs an emotional wallop. Here I had just spent hours feeling self-righteous indignation towards the German people and FDR and American journalists of the era for turning a blind eye to something so huge, and then bam. I'm confronted with just how little thought I give to genocide happening today. It's a helluva twist ending.

Tim and I haven't been going out to eat since we moved to DC, what with trying to be more frugal and all. I think we're both getting bored with the few staples I can cook, so last night I was in a mood to experiment. I tried making chicken broccoli pasta alfredo, which is what Tim always orders whenever we eat at Applebee's. A pasta dish seemed simple enough. Deceptively simple, as it turns out.

I spent hours on this little project if you count all the time spent looking up recipes on the Internet, making an extra trip to the grocery store, preparing and whatnot. And after spending hours and dirtying pretty much every dish, pot and utensil we own, I was forced to declare the results disappointing. I think I was on the right track, but the recipe I used (which I Frankensteined together from four separate recipes) could use some tweaking. Alas.

Oh, well. Cooking is just not one of my talents. And I guess Tim already knew that when we moved in together.

I haven't done one of these in a looooong time. But this is spontaneous.

Best Family Bonding: I just finished watching Pride & Prejudice (2005). The one with Keira Knightley. And I know the story is all about Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy, but I think my absolute favorite scene in the whole movie, the one that socks me straight in heart, is the scene with Lizzie and her father, who is played by Donald Sutherland, where she explains to him why she wants to marry Mr. Darcy even though she's always given the impression that she hated the man.

There's so much going on underneath the dialogue. That she's his favorite of his five children. That he's afraid she's making a pragmatic decision that will leave her terribly unhappy. That he, himself, has been miserable most of his marriage because he chose an unsuitable life partner. That she will do what pleases her, but that his approval is still desperately important. It's so bittersweet and poignant. The rest of the movie I enjoy well enough mainly because it hits all the high points of a book that I don't get tired of reading, but that one scene is perfect.

So far:

Lincoln Memorial
Washington Monument
National Mall
WWII Memorial
Jefferson Memorial
FDR Memorial
Cherry Blossoms
Smithsonian Air & Space Museum
Smithsonian Natural History Museum

**New: The National Zoo

Way back on Memorial Day, Tim and I decided to kick start summer by looking at some exotic animals. I delayed posting because I had to sort through my photos of the trip, and because honestly I don't have that much interesting to report.

The Smithsonian runs a good zoo. But it isn't a great zoo. Or at least we didn't have a great visit that day. That was the first truly hot day of the season, and of course, we chose that particular afternoon to tool around under the blazing sun. So we tired quickly, and the animals weren't very active. Lots of no-shows.

Also, a note on the parking situation: I understand that most tourist attractions in DC encourage use of public transportation to get there since there are heavy crowds (particularly in summer) and a dearth of available parking spots. But the zoo is the only site I've seen so far that exercises outright hostility and disdain for motorists.

Tim, possessing both a inexplicable disdain for the Metro and a relentlessly optimistic nature, usually drives us wherever we go on these little field trips. And, to his credit, usually we do luck out. But not at the zoo. Mainly because once we got there, they had already decided to not allow any more cars to park. At all. All three zoo lots had signs and cones and pissy yellow-vested zoo agents declaring the lots completely full. Despite the fact that we could clearly see cars full of morning visitors pulling out of the lots.

It stands to reason that if a car is leaving, that means there's at least one space open. We couldn't understand why the zoo staff were just standing around looking surly when they could've been using their visible walkie talkies to enact a "one car out, one car in" system so that at least some of the afternoon arrivals could have found convenient parking. But no. Apparently the prevailing logic is "Nobody ever drives here, and if they do drive here, they must be too stupid to live. We're not going to reward their stupidity." I speculated that they just put up the "no parking" signs around noon regardless, and then don't think about it again for the remainder of the day. Ridiculous. But the joke's on them really because we eventually found a metered slot (not monitored on holidays!) about three blocks down from the zoo which saved us having to pay the zoo lot's $20 parking fee. Suckers.

Anyway, back to the zoo itself. It was free (bonus points) and of a respectable size. The enclosures looked fairly cushy, but not at the expense of visitors being able to actually get a look at the animals. And they had some big ticket show-stoppers, most notably pandas. However, they did not have some of my favorites (giraffes, bats, big bears), and I didn't even get a good look at the pandas.

Undoubtedly the coolest thing the National Zoo has going on is their Orangutan Transport System, or O Line. It's a series of 50-foot-high cables strung from towers so that the zoo's orangutans can travel between two separate enclosures. The towers are electrified to keep the orangutans from climbing down, and they're too smart to just jump down from that high. An awesome theory, but unfortunately, we never got to see it in action, which was sort of typical for the day.

Overall, I'd say that the National Zoo is probably better than the Kansas City Zoo. But it's certainly not on the level of San Diego, and I think I'd probably even rank some of the stuff I saw in Chicago or St. Louis higher.

( Photos, frequently blurry. Sorry. )

Yesterday I didn't work. So I slept in, piddled around the house most of the morning, and then worked out. After I came back from the fitness center, I got cleaned up and headed over to UMD to see a guest lecturer give a speech titled, "You Are the Future of Libraries: No Pressure."

Today I didn't work. So I slept in, piddled around the house most of the morning, and then I hung out by the rooftop pool in the afternoon. After I swam mini-laps to the point of exhaustion, I came back downstairs and strongly considered going to get Indian take-out for lunch, but ultimately stayed in. I ate some PB&J and snuggled with my cat on the couch.

Tomorrow I'll work a half day, and I think I might go window-shopping at furniture stores after I get off. Or maybe I'll just take a tremendous nap in the middle of the day.

This is the kind of stuff I won't be able to do once I start my new job on Monday. You know, I've spent the past months trying to convince any employer who'd listen that I'm this totally self-motivated library powerhouse, but the God's honest truth is, I loved working only part-time. At the ripe old age of 27, I'm ready to embrace semi-retirement. Of course, I didn't love trying to scrape a meager living out of a part-time salary, which is why I'm ultimately grateful to go back to full-time employment. But I'll admit I'm a bit leery about transitioning from the slacker schedule I'm on now to the cracked-out two-jobs schedule I'll be pulling from next week until September. More than a bit really.

In honor of my three month anniversary of moving to the Washington, D.C. area, I give you this: reflections on using public transit, written in a journal over many weeks, usually while riding on or waiting for public transit.

* I know I'm a dork, but I find it terribly exciting when the Metro train pulls into the station a bit too fast and screeches to a halt. I imagine myself wearing a black trench coat a la the Matrix, billowing dramatically in the screechy breeze. I'm aware that this is the train equivalent of saying "I love it when guys peel out" but I just can't help myself.

* Unless I'm wearing high heels, I actually enjoy standing up on the Metro. It makes it seem less like a hassle and more like an adventure ride. It reminds me of when I visited professor in San Francisco and we stood on a completely empty trolley because that just seemed more appropriate than sitting. But I absolutely require a vertical pole to hang onto. I am not tall enough to comfortably stabilize myself using the horizontal bars near the train's ceiling. It seems like you need enough height so that your bent elbow makes a right angle to really make that work.

( Read more... )

Much phone conversation today. An unusual amount. I talked to my dad because it was Father's Day. I talked to Diana because she needs me to take care of her dogs next weekend. I talked to my mom because she was driving home from a trip to Oklahoma, and I talked to oberongeiger because... well, just because.

So I went to "services" again this Sunday. The theme of this morning's message:




Controlling Your Inner Demons


I have to say, I greatly enjoyed The Incredible Hulk. I think it's probably as good as Iron Man, although the latter is more fun and therefore I liked it a bit more. However, this movie manages to maintain a fairly compelling narrative *and* cram in A LOT more action, probably because its primary concern isn't telling an origin story. Even so, there are enough origin-related bits to clearly and without hesitation mark this as a reboot. I had wondered if the makers would leave just a tiny bit of wriggle room so that the minority of people who actually liked Hulk back in 2003 might be able to fan-wank themselves a cohesive continuity. But nope. Sucks to be them.

Even on an early Sunday morning show, the theater was pretty crowded. I'm always torn on the crowd issue because, on the one hand, a good group experience can ratchet up the entertainment value of seeing a movie at the theater. On the other hand, people frequently suck. I considered asking a mother and young daughter sitting next to me why they couldn't be bothered to shut up for the whole second half of the movie, but I thought better of it. Mainly because they both gave identical delighted, genteel little claps of the "Ooh, a tea party!" variety right when Hulk and the Abomination started whaling on each other. Just a bit creepy that. Fortunately, action films are always so over-amplified anymore, the soundtrack drowned out whatever they were saying for the most part.




Green Hulk, Green Tank Top


This is my idea of dressing up for a premiere weekend. I plan to wear a similar purple tank top in honor of the Joker for The Dark Knight. Fun fact: That's the exact same green tank top I wore for Hulk. It just illustrates that 2003 really wasn't all that long ago at all. The shirt isn't even very stretched out or faded yet.

I specifically set aside today as the day when I would finally write my essay for the Myra Wilson scholarship for master's students in library science. Instead I spent all afternoon lounging by The Tower's rooftop pool. And none of you can make me feel bad about it. So there.