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WED 25 SEP 2013 | |
01:13PM my french exit
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SUN 20 JUL 2008 | |
05:57PM what a weird weekend
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well, i just rescued a girl from the american apparel mansion.
i'm not joking.
music: "mansion" is so bourgie but that's its name
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[ 35 bats released | release the bats! ]
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FRI 18 JUL 2008 | |
08:15PM important
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THU 20 MAR 2008 | |
02:02PM halp
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please talk to me about good digital cameras under $1000 (ideally under $500 but if it's like earthmoving i'll charge the hell out of it). i am favoring canon or nikon. is this wrong?
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[ 84 bats released | release the bats! ]
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MON 10 MAR 2008 | |
02:58PM ohmygod
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do you know how much i love you
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WED 27 FEB 2008 | |
09:05PM claw aboot the hoose
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i just hung a photograph and then walked around cheering "YES IT LOOKS SO GOOD" while brandishing a hammer.
my continued spinsterdom is baffling, no?
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[ 35 bats released | release the bats! ]
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TUE 19 FEB 2008 | |
12:50PM weighing in
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I HATE VAMPIRE WEEKEND
you can all go back to your regularly-scheduled LJing now.
mood: hater tots
music: it's not fucking vampire weekend
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[ 111 bats released | release the bats! ]
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SUN 27 JAN 2008 | |
11:45AM PET PEEVE
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TUE 22 JAN 2008 | |
01:52PM WHAT
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TUE 11 DEC 2007 | |
01:06PM gimme the sparkly! i gotta have the sparkly!
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WED 05 DEC 2007 | |
09:47AM i would rather die than give you control
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my brother ed is probably seven. he barrels down the hallway into the living room where my sister and i are watching television on the couch; he launches into the air and lands dramatically, sinking his plastic teenage mutant ninja turtles scimitar into a floor cushion. "TERRIBLE LIE!" he howls. it is my fault: i have given him a case of the nine inch nails by osmosis; i laugh until i cry.
• • •
i don't know how to write about music but last night i was reminded of the existence of pretty hate machine by ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) octavekitten and unearthed the disc (seriously, what are we supposed to do now with our books of a thousand cds, unsellable, denuded of case? they are fantastic time capsules: music i liked, 1994-2004. right?). the commute was rendered hilarious as the honda filled with menacing casio and paper-thin bass, and then trent reznor's adenoidal midwestern whine stomped along the lyrics like a bad karaoke revolution contestant. and then i died.
"sanctified," in particular, features an aggressively dorky slap bass line, the likes of which have not been heard since early depeche mode, as well as atmospheric bongos and the mandatory synth "ZAP!" sound (hard to describe, but i know you know it). yes. i know. i think a great part of the allure of NIN in the early 90s was its similarity to certain video game soundtracks; i was mainly (duh) into spooky or wizardy games, and sending a 16-bit elf warrior creeping around a pixel-haunted castle was rendered more engaging by the gothy themes that repeated, on average, every forty seconds. but so whatever, tangent, sorry, what i was attempting to get at was that there was something more indelibly lonely and nerdy about the goth/industrial/D&D crap of the 90s than previous, and pretty hate machine is in some ways a paean to that. (my sister will not let go the incident in which i découpaged, using a thousand tiny bits of torn paper, the image of trent reznor onto my trash can. this from the girl who has every backstreet doll in a box under her bed. but i digress again.)
the lyrics have not aged well. songwriters have it easier than poets in that they often get away with "telling, not showing" and doing a lot of me, me, me talk and not having to adhere to any sort of meter; this lends some universality to the song wherein the listener can feel autobiographical and participatory. when i was 14, he was singing the gospel of disillusionment, isolation, nonconformity, maaaan, and i was listening avidly. at 29 i almost crashed my car laughing at the spastic brattiness of his complaints ("now i'm slipping on the tears you've made me cry!") and the ill-articulated feelingness of his feelings, which he was feeling very feelingly ("i was feeling some feelings you wouldn't believe / sometimes i don't believe them myself" OH WOW TRENT THOSE ARE SOME IMPORTANT FEELINGS DOOD). strings of clichés compound into merry garlands of super-delicious disaffectation and whining: "i'll cross my heart, i'll hope to die/but the needle's already in my eye/and all the world's weight is on my back/and i don't even know why" [emphasis mine]. WHY, MOM?! i am reminded of the time my rave dj roommate, adam, an emaciated yet large-panted detroit native, slumped over our kitchen table in despair: "i wish i were a gourd," he muffled out from under his arms, "cos if i were a gourd, i wouldn't have a final tomorrow." DUDE: TRENT KNOWS!
any goth can tell you that the album was recorded at night while reznor worked as a janitor during the day in ohio or something, and as such it's impressive from an engineering standpoint, but his craft might have been well-served via some creative writing classes at the local community college. the choruses out-emo any eyelinered poof afoot today: that's what i get, maybe i'm all messed up, you can't take that away from me--reacting to the world as though it's an extremely large and unfair parent who denies him a promised toy, along with a healthy dose of pre-emo fear and loathing for the sake of fear and loathing. the goths who preceded him were invested in the romance of decay or in a kind of proto-punk what's-the-world-coming-to contemplation; contrariwise, reznor was bratted off that everything sucked for him, all the time. the difference seems to be that 1989, it was the exception to feel that way, not the rule; NIN offered a cretinous sanctuary for the slim percentage of the population beginning to experience a foot-stompy ennui about how shit was unfair (apparently they didn't get the memo from jareth the goblin king). of course the steamroller of industrial fuck noise barreled forward and meatheads signed on and then NIN exploded in popularity the way that, say, skinny puppy never would (their lyrics were too hard), but that was later. i'd guess it's because everyone likes to think about how pissed off and maligned and mistreated he is, in simple terms, and then wear 18-hole doc martens about it.
what surprised me the most was how sturdy "something i can never have" has remained. i had pretty hate machine on cassette, a format that allowed for two album beginnings and endings (start and end of sides A or B), and though it was the last track on side A (meaning that on a cd or ipod it comes smack in the middle of the album), it always read like the closing track to me (reznor figured it out on subsequent releases and put the real leaky-wrist numbers last). the crunchy battleship-clang noises on that track sound great, as does the contemplative piano riff; it comes off more like the moonlight sonata than a cheap melodic gimmick. but the desperation and compounding intensity of feeling (see also bauhaus "crowds," another of the great teenage breakup songs)--is that something we never lose? is that frustration, rather than an adolescent indulgence that we eventually outgrow, actually one of the first tastes of adult despair? i was still moved by the song; i am in no position to judge; i am mentally 14 forever.
• • •
claudia: Terrible lie!
brother: aahahahahaha
claudia: i'm dying
brother: wait, you are?
claudia: no i mean i'm laughing really hard, i don't have cancer or anything
brother: oh
claudia: although when i do get cancer i'll be sure to inform you by texting you NIN lyrics
music: i can't digest certain types of drugs but i won't give up
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[ 110 bats released | release the bats! ]
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WED 14 NOV 2007 | |
09:10PM just checking in
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the new victoria's secret angel--little dimpled brunette thing, she's either an aussie or a kiwi, my interest in this does not extend to any sort of internet scholarship, she's adorable, whatever--is made, in the commercial, to recite a limerick, the following:
there once was an angel so fair
whose bra cups were lighter than air
the reason you see
it's no mystery
her bra cups were made out of air.
AND EVERY GODDAM TIME IT'S ON, WHICH IS LIKE 6 TIMES AN HOUR, I SIT THERE GOING "awww, well she's really rather cute" and then "...and she looks 14" and then "....BUT YOU CANNOT RHYME 'AIR' WITH 'AIR' IT'S JUST. NOT. OKAY" sputter sputter rage. I MEAN COME ON!
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[ 69 bats released | release the bats! ]
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SUN 07 OCT 2007 | |
03:45AM an ocean full of grief, & rage.
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SAT 06 OCT 2007 | |
01:05PM maybe when i'm older
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there is some unutterable pathos in the i think it's purina commercial that states "dogs just want to be with us."
music: lie in road for you & i've been yr slave
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[ 5 bats released | release the bats! ]
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FRI 05 OCT 2007 | |
12:50AM in 2080 i will surely be dead, so don't look ahead, never look ahead.
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WED 03 OCT 2007 | |
05:06PM whoop. there it is.
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the only thing i have ever stolen from a hospital, despite many many many stays, visits, & haunts there--and six months of working in one*--was a box of ammonia inhalant ampules, essentially modern-day smelling salts. a few minutes ago i just craved one for no reason. they don't even do anything, really, but make your eyes water.
( and now, celebrity imagemath )
i have eaten eight antacids (¡antiácidos!) today, but keep ingesting things that will only serve to stoke this heinous, newly-shocking heartburn, because i forget, because i have always had an iron stomach, and then i'm like dear sweet crispy christ, why am i haphazardly dumping chili flakes into this otherwise-neutral bean soup, ow ow torso ow. "because you're an idiot, that's why." "ohhhh right." there's a parable in this somewhere.
( a few artfaggy pictures related to nothing in particular )
*as a security guard. dig.
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[ 26 bats released | release the bats! ]
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SAT 29 SEP 2007 | |
12:53PM now taking suggestions
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hoKAYYYY i need to start planning a halloween costume. i am semi-ashamed as a fervent ex-goth to admit that the last couple of years i have been halfassing it, & while demi-assery is a sort of LIFESTYLE CHOICE to which i consistently adhere, i am just not doing one of my top hols any honour by it.
l.alle [in a fat suit!!] & i are going as edwina & patsy from absolutely fabulous (costumes in which looking more destroyed/plastered as the night goes on is actually part of the "look": AWESOME) but there're bound to be multiple parties so i will need more GUISES.
PLS NOTHING:
nude/super-vulgar unless it is really, really funny
"sexy" iteration of regular thing
that people might not recognize as a costume (i.e. cannot go "as" debbie harry)
I AM BORED BY:
robots, ninjas, pirates, zombies, boring, over it, passé, the shark has leapt, ppl
PICTURES OF WHATCHU MEEN ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.
i am now headed to a "veritable hipster hoedown" [OH NOEEEESSSSS] [is it consolatory if i tell you that i don't pay for this kind of stuff, i'm not going to drop $80 on DJs unless it's underworld; nevertheless, yeah, i'm guilty, am a dick, will not apport any neon] [I FORGOT TO TELL YOU THAT THURSDAY I STOMPED* ON STEVE AOKI'S FOOT]!! until then, i bid you dwell on THIS little slice of sad-true heaven:
*maybe like a little deliberately, okay, the wife & i were a bit shredded & you don't just LUNGE IN FOR A HUG whilst i am unawares, duder, we met but like we ain't HOMIES, you ain't met his mom how the hell you ride for him?, etc., so i soiled his pristine kicks & raged smartly away. classic!
this entry brot to you by brackets & parentheses.
music: chromatics "in the city"/"lady"/"hotel"
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[ 57 bats released | release the bats! ]
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SUN 23 SEP 2007 | |
01:50PM hollyweird & vine, 330am.
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by-the-by, this face? not intended to be a "cute winking" face.
the cat was clawing me. the nude, shlorpy cat. in a sweater.
mood: it's a living.
music: daniel's saving grace, she's out in deep water, hope he's a good swimmer
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[ 58 bats released | release the bats! ]
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MON 10 SEP 2007 | |
05:34PM what does your soul sound like
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WED 05 SEP 2007 | |
10:14PM LET IT BE KNOWN
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MY SHOULDERS ARE THE BROADEST IN ALL THE LAND
maybe i had a glass of wine from my barnes-new glasses.
MAYBE I DID, OR THREE.
mood: ALFALFA!!
music: JUST LIKE A RAINBOW, YOU KNOW YOU SET ME FREE
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[ 37 bats released | release the bats! ]
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