Jamie's Big Gay Hospital Adventure
It all started while eating an extra cheesy combination pizza from work Thursday night. I had noticed it had settled weird, but gave it no worries.

Cut to 5:30 AM, Friday. I woke up having to throw up. So I did. Bye bye, pizza. But it just wouldn't stop. Eventually, say around 6:30, it became blood. And not just, "eh, I coughed up a little blood, no big deal." It was... blood. It stopped for a while around 8, so I drank a little water. No big deal, right? Wrong. The water came back, and more blood. Mmm. Delicious.

I told my aunt about it, so she came and got me and rushed me to E.R. at Kaiser. I waited for four hours, all the while heaving blood and the Tylenol they gave me to make me shut up, before I helped. Fuckers. Anyway. They put me on an I.V. since I was super dehydrated. So dehydrated, mind you, that it took five tries before they could find a vein that wouldn't collapse. So dehydrated that they put an entire three bags of saline in my system. I stopped puking around 1 AM Saturday morning. YAY! I gave them a urine sample once the fluids got to my system (around 5 AM, I think) and I was happily checked out a few hours later. They gave me some pills to stop me from vomitting (if taken before eating) and told me to talk to my doctor should anything else happen.

And now I'm all better, except for all the busted blood vessels in my face. I look DEAD. I feel DEAD. Meh.