Ok, so today I totally ditched class [actually I was up till 5 a.m. talking to Jared and I had to be up at 8:30 for my math class and didn't wake up and over slept and finally woke up at 11:56 *fuck* so I decided not to go to art history...seeing as how miller missed it on Monday...we could just exchange notes] and went to Barnes and Nobles and bought GQ, British GQ, V Magazine, and V Man...I spent like $30...arg I say, arg. But totally worth it because I've become obsessed with V!



So I decided to show ya'll my favorite ads/editorials and I tallied up the total number of times some of my favorite models were featured and here it is:
Daria Webowry: 6
Gemma Ward: 2
Gisele Bundchen: 2
RJ: 1

( Hi, I'm Daria and I'm the queen of the fashion world )

Hell, the last issue was completly dedicated to her

but i'll admit, that's partly why I bought it last month ♥

Gemma Ward[ness]
( Hi, I'm Gemma and I'm the princess of the fashion world )

Brazilian Bombshell
( Hi, I'm Gisele and I'm the former queen of the fashion world )

I also decided to include "Eyecandy" primarily because I know Paris is thinking the same thing, so I can't get in trouble! Ha!

( Tap it... )

Allright, so I realize that these boys are very androgynous, but you know you would tap that ass. whore.

I've also included my favorite ( editorials )

And my favorite ( clothes )

Finally, ♥ LEGENDARY LAGERFELD ♥
oh how I adore this man!

which ones do you ♥?

Todayx5prototype [my Niners] and I went shopping near Palm Springs. We wanted to go to Morongo and gamble, but clothes seemed more important at the moment. After hours of walking and hundreds of steps taken, and thousands of hangers unhung, I finally found something I wanted...



kick ass mofo socks. only 13 bucks for all 3. love them; love me.
&hearts &hearts &hearts

[Edit]

On Tuesday, my daddy bought me my awesome Dior sunglasses



Alone, they may seem simple and plain, but on me, it becomes perfection personified. you adore me and you know it!!!

I also cut my hair on Friday [Edit] I got a hair cut (Josh).
Yes, so now I am ( bald ). What do we think guys? Do we love it or hate it? Do not judge me! For those pictures came out worse than a Mexican drunk on cocaine puking up salsa verde. But it gives you an idea of what my hair looks like now.

Lastly, I am sad to say that parasitic [Miller] does not know who my favorite band is. Well, I am offended. I might forgive her if she can redeem herself...
Ok, I can't think of a good question, so whatever. I'll forgive you this time Miller...afterall, you knew AA XXX. [sending mad props to miller. hope your feeling better and sorry about your grandpa. i &hearts you]

Ok, one more thing, for reals now, I will sleep with WHOEVER finds this for me:


Label: Cloak
Designer: Alexandre Plokhov

I &hearts it and I want it. I think they only sell is in LA, NY, Europe, and Asia. And I think it's in Barney's New York near Beverly Hills, but I'm not sure. The point is that if you find it at a near by store, I will love you forever times six...chances are that if you're on my lj, I already do, but you get the idea. Gracias mis amores!

[Edit v2]
I'm also thinking of auditioning for the 2005 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show that's going to air in November. Move over Gisele, Juan's taking your spot. Would YOU tune in if they hired me as one of their runway models? I think so. lol

I read today that Les Moonves hasn't ruled out Jon Stewart as one of the candidates to replace Dan Rather on the CBS evening news. That's a bigger joke than Ashlee Simpson's career. I know Stewart's read enough of his absurdly glowing press to believe he's Walter Cronkite, but is there nobody left who realizes he's a FRIGGIN' COMEDIAN?!? One who's mildly amusing at best and hosted two flop talk shows, no less. Why not put Carrot Top and Pauly Shore on "60 Minutes" while you're at it? They're gonna force Rather out for alleged political bias and bring in some clown from basic cable who openly admits to political bias? For crying out loud, am I the only who one who thinks it's the dumbest idea since Clear Pepsi?!?!?

Ya know who else is looking awfully full of himself these days? Jared, the dweeb who lost a billion pounds eating Subway sandwiches. Now they've got him doing commercials where he just rags on the other fast food joints with a really, really smug look on his face. Shouldn't he have been retired to the scrap heap with Mr. Wendy and the Taco Bell chihuahua by now? Maybe they can get Jared to anchor the network news.

Oh, and do any of you have experience with Blockbuster's online rental service? My free month of Netflix is about to expire, so I'm thinking I might cancel that, give Blockbuster's free trial a shot, and then subscribe to the one I prefer. Near as I can tell, Blockbuster copied Netflix's system verbatim...except BB's offer is three bucks cheaper per month and includes a couple in-store rentals. From what I've checked so far, the selection appears to be just as good. Everything currently in my Netflix queue is listed on the Blockbuster site. BB also has some special edition discs that aren't available through Netflix (e.g. the reissues of The Professional and Rounders with commentary tracks). Most surprising of all, Blockbuster's offering some unrated stuff (like the director's cut of Requiem For A Dream), which would seem to fly in the face of their usual tight-assed policies. I'm approaching with healthy skepticism, though, so feel free to let me know if there's something horribly wrong with the Blockbuster service that I'm not aware of.

By the way, both sites stock the "Wonderfalls" box set...which doesn't matter to me, since I just bought that (courtesy of a Borders gift card I'd been hanging onto since Christmas). Thank goodness the show had such a rabid, squeaky wheelish cult following. Series that get canned by the network after four episodes don't usually pull off a 3-disc DVD release! Mmm...quirky ironic goodness.

No structure. Just ambiguity.

I'm sick and tired of people saying "heighth" when they mean "height." There's no such word, dipshits. Length, yes. Width, yes. Heighth, no. Meanwhile, do we really need TWO reality shows about nannies? Lord knows I'm not averse to watching unscripted television, but since when do bratty kids being disciplined qualify as entertainment? Weirdness.

Just out of curiosity, when did everyone decide to flip flop the definitions of historic and historical? All of a sudden I've been hearing those words used incorrectly more often than not. The example that set me off just now was a quote from Barry Bonds about how three 500 home run guys playing in the same All Star Game outfield is "historical." Dude man bro, a particularly momentous occasion is HISTORIC. Events from the past are HISTORICAL. People need to stop screwing that up.

I finally watched Kill Bill: Volume 1 tonight. I love Tarantino's first three films and have seen all of them multiple times, but I had a feeling this one wouldn't be my cup o' joe. Boy, you can say that again. Quentin's an awfully talented guy, but with the possible exception of "American Idol," old kung fu movies are his least interesting obsession. I suppose it's fine if you're into heavily stylized nonsense with absolutely no relation to anything that actually exists on Planet Earth. For me, ehh, not so much. I even had to fast forward through parts of it, which is something I never do. Sorry, but the anime sequence alone seemed to drag on for several lifetimes.

I just had an encounter with the world's prettiest girl. Her name is Sarah and she's the new teller at my bank. It would appear that I'm not alone in my smitten take on her. As I was standing in line, I watched a guy openly hit on her. Couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but the body language and facial expressions told the tale. Seething in patient envy, I said a silent prayer that she'd be available to call on me before one of the usual hags who've been working there forever and tend to give me dirty looks. Then it happened. Fate smiled upon me as I reached the front of the line and the flirtatious guy bid her adieu. Yes, I would have an audience with the angel.

The rest is sort of a blur, but I do remember her asking, "any special way?" Believe you me, it took considerable restraint to not give a wholly inappropriate answer. There was a little delay at the end, when she had to print my updated balance in the passbook. "I'm making sure it's not in an inky spot, so you can read it," she explained with a smile. No teller had ever done that for me before, let alone a modern day goddess. Bless your heart, Sarah. She wished me a good night...never mind that it was the middle of the afternoon. Perhaps time moves differently in whatever alternate universe this equisite beauty hails from. "You too," I feebly replied before sauntering off. What I really meant to say was "please run away with me and have 10,000 of my babies," but there's always next time.

If I were a month, I'd be June.
If I were a day of the week, I'd be the one that ends in y.
If I were a time of day, I'd be 4:32.
If I were a planet, I'd be Uranus.
If I were a sea animal, I'd be a pretty one.
If I were a direction, I'd be down.
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be an ottoman.
If I were a sin, I'd be greed.
If I were a liquid, I'd be NyQuil.
If I were a tree, I'd be a Barbara Walters question.
If I were a bird, I'd be a canary.
If I were a flower, I'd be a lily.
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be a tropical depression.
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be a clay jug.
If I were an animal, I'd be the chinchilla on Mary's back.
If I were a color, I'd be cappucino.
If I were an emotion, I'd be ambivalence.
If I were a vegetable, I'd be corn.
If I were a fruit, I'd be on Bravo.
If I were a sound, I'd fall in the forest where no one could hear me. ohh...would I still be a sound?
If I were an element, I'd be Einsteinium.
If I were a song, I'd be woman like a man.
If I were a movie, I'd be Space Balls.
If I were a food, I'd be a snickerdoodle.
If I were a taste, I'd be sour.
If I were a scent, I'd be potpourri.
If I were an object, I'd be inanimate.
If I were a body part, I'd be the evolotionary thumb.
If I were a facial expression, I'd be a smirk.
If I were a subject in school, I'd be recess.
If I were a cartoon character, I'd be Anonymous Smurf.
If I were a shape, I'd be a Slinky.
If I were a number, I'd be number Juan.