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[11 Mar 2007|02:45pm] |
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I got accepted to the Masters of Social Work program at Binghamton University!!
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| 100 days |
[15 Feb 2007|04:06pm] |
So tonight is 100 days until graduation... the big seniors celebration at Keuka. And I'm in Endicott... pretty much sucks, thanks a lot snow! :(
I had everything planned to go out there after I got done at my practicum at 4pm... the car was all packed and I even was able to leave early so I could make it to Keuka before dark. So I made my way over to Price Chopper to pick up my paycheck and because of the snow, they're not there. They don't know when the paychecks will arrive.
I have all of 8 dollars in my wallet and enough gas to get to Keuka but no money for drinks tonight or to get back tomorrow. It sucks. I was looking forward to hanging out with the girls that I haven't seen in so long.
So instead of going to Keuka, Nick and I are going to Amy's for a few drinks and our own mini-celebration. At least I'll be celebrating 100 days with Amy.
Bah, stupid snow!
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| new years |
[31 Dec 2006|05:57pm] |
So there's approximately 7 hours left of 2006. Most of my friends are going out to celebrate... and I am staying at home with Nicholas. It doesn't bother me at all that we're staying home and making it a quiet night. However, I got to thinking... how many people actually celebrate the end and beginning of a year? and how many people celebrate just to get drunk? it's never been a big deal for me... just another year gone by.
This time... I'm going to see how much I've accomplished and if I feel it's truly been a productive year.
In the year 2006, I have...
Said "I love you" and for the first time, really, truly, know what love is.
Determined what fields of Social Work I do not want to go in.
Discovered new possiblities for fields I do want to go in.
Moved out of my childhood home.
Moved into a home with Nicholas.
Got uitilities put into my name for the first time.
Handed my job as Big Brothers Big Sisters Coordinator over to another student.
Realized who true friends are.
Grown closer with my Grandfather.
Eaten sushi, and enjoyed it!
Made new and amazing friends.
Established and developed professional connections.
Paid off my computer.
Celebrated Christmas in a home other than my childhood home.
Took a road trip to Florida.
Discovered health information and underwent a medical procedure.
Learned to sucessfully control my use of alcohol.
Established a 5 month practicum beginning in January.
Met Nick's son.
Became the playmate for Nick's son.
Met Nick's family.
Introduced Nick to my family.
With just this list and knowing that I've done more, I feel that 2006 has been quite the year. The one loss that I suffered was the loss of my cat, Hunni. That was extremely tough but I am fortunate to have people close to me that know how tough it is to lose a close pet.
I am so excited to see what 2007 brings... with a 5 month long internship, graduation, and grad school. It will be crazy but new and exciting.
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| ugh |
[02 Oct 2006|01:47pm] |
So my 21st birthday is coming up... 8 days... on October 10... it should be a really exciting moment however, how come I feel so blah about it? At first, I was really ecstatic because I will then be able to go out with my friends and be able to go into a liquor store and not have to wait in the car. I'm not a real big drinker so I don't really care so much about the being legal to drink aspect. I was expecting to go out to the bar on my birthday but it is a Tuesday and it's beer pong night at the bars in town and I really don't like beer pong. My birthday lies right at the end of our October break... we leave campus on Friday after classes and then the dorms open back up on Tuesday afternoon with classes starting again on Wednesday.
Because of this break... Amy (my roomate and best friend at school) is staying at her boyfriend's for the weekend and is just going to skip classes on Wednesday and come back Thursday morning. So she won't be here for my birthday! She doesn't even see how much of a deal this is to me. She constantly leaves, cancels plans, ditches, etc. for her boyfriend. This guy is a huge tool and is a huge asshole towards her. It is a serious case of domestic violence- emotionally. Yet she is so "in love" with him. Now, I know that when you think you are so in love with someone, you do tend to focus everything around that one person and occasionally do ditch your friends. But this is a constant thing and she seems to just not care. She ditches me, her little, and other friends for him quite often and then we take care of her when he breaks her heart every other day. It's really tiring. I don't know, in all, things between Amy and I have just been awkward this semester. We're not very confrontational people so it's tough brining up my concerns about things and how they make me feel. We had one discussion about how I am not a fan of her boyfriend but that lasted all of three minutes and was brushed off. I just feel as though her boyfriend is absolutely first, above everybody else... and in a way, I do understand because Nick is definately one of the priorities in my life however, I do use my common sense about it and put my school work and my independence above him. ah whatever...
Ugh, so back to my birthday... I'm not really looking forward to it as much anymore.
But this is the plan...
Tuesday the 10th (the big day)- I'm coming back from Binghamton since I am staying there for the weekend. Nick's father and I share the same birthday so I will go to his parents house for dinner and cake (without Nick since he will be off at his job site).
Wednesday the 11th- Getting absolutely trashed with Chelsey and Kelley and whomever else shows up... should be a really good time :)
Thursday the 12th- First night out at the bars :) It's also Sarah's 22nd birthday so I suppose I am sharing the limelight with her.
Friday the 13th- Going home to go out to Cavallo's with Katie... which should be a f'in blast since it's always a great time when it's Katie and I :)
Then major recouperation and relaxation for the weekend and catching up on the homework.
It will most likely be quite a fun week... however, I just wish my best friend would be around for my 21st birthday.. or if not, then at least show some sort of remorse for not being able to be here.
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| oh la la ;) |
[19 Jun 2006|03:03pm] |
So I just spent this past weekend in Binghamton with Nicholas :) It hasn't been too bad so far this summer finding time to see each other. The only thing that is difficult is not being able to see him as often as I would like to. Back at Keuka, I could see him every weekend because either he would come to Keuka or I would go out to Binghamton. However, now that I'm home... mom freaks out if I go over there two weekends in a row. My house is too small for Nicholas to stay in. He's about 6'2 and our doorways are at about 6'2 and he runs into our light/fan fixtures on the ceiling. So I won't be going out there this weekend... pretty sad about it but I can pick up some shifts at the chopper and make some money :)
But so back to the weekend... Nicholas just got a new apartment so we had to do the whole packing/moving/unpacking ordeal. It was so hot! The apartment is on the second floor so with the heat and our location, we were pretty much sweating! But so yeah, we have a new apartment now and it's pretty nice. And yes.. I did say we :) I have my own key and starting at the end of the fall semester, I will be living there. :) :) This is a whole new step for me and I'm pretty darn excited about it.
We're in the process of planning a vacation together. We want to go to Florida for two weeks after I am done for the semester. It'll be right after our one year anniversary so we'll be celebrating that and also christmas since we will probably be in florida for that. I know, it seems like we have a lot planned for us already and it hasn't been a year yet. But sometimes things just feel right and this feels right.
humm... lets see... anything else? I think that's it for now.
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| oh dear. |
[26 May 2006|08:05pm] |
*big sigh* Robin im'ed me a couple nights ago. "hey I miss talkin to ya gnite"
after about 7 months, he finally decides that he wants to talk and be civil. we last left things with him screaming at me and calling me a slut. and now he misses talking to me? I tried on quite a few occasions to patch things up and try to be at least friends again since we have known each other since we were like 3 years old. However, each of my attempts were brutally shot down.
so I im'ed him back earlier this morning with a "hey..." It was so awkward and I had that uneasy feeling in my gut and just wanted to vomit. But we continued... and he's doing okay, not great but still alive. His girls are doing wonderfully.
I had no idea what to say so I just kinda sat here with my hands on the keyboard and hoped... that maybe words would just flow and... and everything would be normal again. Then he said "how's the man? better be treatin ya right cuz you deserve it" so how did I go from being a slut to being a person that deserves someone to treat me right? I said he's doing great and he does treat me right.
Somehow I mentioned that I always fall for men with children and I stated that Nick has a son. Robin proceeded to mention that he thought the reason why we would never work out was because he has children. That was never an issue for me... but apparently it was for him.
Then... the moment came. "to be perfectly honest... I'm still waiting for our second chance, whether it be near or far... when we're 30 or 80" That's what he said. *gasp for breath*
we had our second chance... we had our 20th chance. He hurt me one too many times and it was rough... I am in a happy point in my life and I love where my life is and where it's headed. I told him that. I love Nicholas and I do see him in my future. I know, some say it's still early... 6 months, close to 7... however, he makes me feel in ways that I cannot even begin to explain. Robin just could not do that. Yes, he makes me laugh and smile... but the butterflies are not there and to be honest, I do not know if they ever were. Most of the time, I got that gut feeling that just made me want to vomit (as I felt during this morning's conversation).
As a social worker, we're taught to trust our gut instinct and apparently my gut is telling me that this whole situation with Robin is and pretty much always has been a murky situation and not an area to get involved in. I did not listen before but I definately am going to now.
Butterflies with Nicholas or vomit feelings with Robin...
Never settle for anything less than butterflies.
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| bah... |
[07 Apr 2006|08:58pm] |
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chitty chitty bang bang... |
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ugh... I am so freakin stressed out... I thought we were supposed to come back from break feeling all refreshed. oh no definately not! I come back with a horrible cold, major test, and everything on my plate.
so I need to rant...
tutoring is stupid, pointless, and they all waste my freakin time. yeah I get paid but the point of tutoring is for them to get extra help and learn stuff, whatever that stuff may be. but of course, they all (except for like 2) come to the study sessions completely unprepared, no books or notes or anything. Now, I can understand if they haven't been doing anything in class and don't really have anything.. but when they have exams, its like they're like wait... what? an exam? really?... it's ridiculus and like I said, a complete waste of my time.
big brothers big sisters is my passion at keuka... if that could be my full time job right now, I would be amazingly happy.. however it's not and my hours are limited and I feel like I can't do all that I need to do.. my assistant sucks major ass and I wish I had the authority to fire her but then again, I wouldn't have someone to push all over campus doing the shit activities I don't feel like doing... the events I give her to plan, she takes forever planning and most of the time does a half assed job completing it. her heart isn't into the program anymore and she plans on transfering in the fall... so freakin quit already! I have someone else coming in shortly to co-coordinate the program with me, so I cannot wait for that! but I haven't done any match monitoring at all this year... we have a bunch of events coming up that aren't finalized yet. we have a million and one female keuka applicants for the fall and freakin 2 million penn yan boys that need to be matched but of course only one keuka boy has signed up... *sigh*
and then Phi Alpha (social work honor society) is so stupid.. we have to do this brunch induction ceremony during may day weekend, right before the ceremony thing at 1pm.. and since most of the members right now besides me and one other girl are doing their senior practicums and are never on campus, me and the other girl have to plan and distribute all this crap to the inductees and do all this fundraiser stuff. it's a huge pain in my ass.
oh! and get this... I was doing the whole registration stuff for next year and I only need 2 more courses, my junior practicum, and my senior practicum and I have my ASL major. junior practicum is already set and ready to go in the summer... the senior one I'm gonna have to squeeze in somewhere, possibly do it the summer after I graduate... now... one of the courses is in the fall which is fine.. but the spring semester course... *SIGH* it's only offered every other spring semester, I would have taken it last spring but I had a full courseload with other courses that were higher in priority. so... knowing this, I covered all my bases last year and asked the department head of social work if I could take an asl course during my social work practicum as long as it was a night class and she hesitated but we worked on it and she said it was fine, I'd just have to do an exception to policy because they have a rule where you can't take any courses when you're doing your senior social work practicum. SO next I went to the ASL profs and requested that this class be a night class during spring semester '07 and they said NOT A PROBLEM! and recorded it so when it came time to schedule classes, they could make it a night class.... NOW it is like that whole thing I KNOW! happened, is like a freakin dream! The swk profs say I cannot cannot cannot take a class when I'm on practicum unless it is independent study and I am not doing independent study... and the class is freakin only being offered m/w/f from 9-10am! what the hell is going on! so *sigh* I have to drop my ASL major down to a minor... which means, the stupid deaf lit class I'm in now, I don't need to be in! and I need to cancel my practicum for the summer... but whatever, I don't even have the energy to shennangle my way around the system.. I'm already freakin fluent in ASL, I don't need a degree to prove it. stupid keuka.
okay and one more thing... Amy (my roomate) and I have become really close this year, we just click... like, we just get each other. I never thought of this as a bad thing but apparently one of the swk profs whom I have such respect for told us on tuesday that our close friendship is something we need to be cautious about. she said we're "alienating other people." oh whatever... if I'm not friends with you... then maybe I don't want to be friends with you. ugh... I'm not the kind of person that needs to be friends with everyone and their mother's brother's uncle. I am very happy with my close handful of true friends and then the aquaintances that I hang out with now and then. I'm not going to be best of friends with everyone I meet! seriously now... and it's not like I hang out with JUST Amy... I have other friends that she doesn't have and she has other friends that I don't have... ugh, it just makes me so frustrated. I'm happy with how my "friend status" is and I don't need to change it to appease some professor.
bah... end rant.
oh and you know what. this is a public journal entry, if you're mentioned in here and don't like it... don't read my journal. I'm not going to freak out about some crazy person reading my journal and have to go all psycho again and make it private... I don't feel like being private right now with my rants so whatever.
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| :) |
[12 Dec 2005|02:23pm] |
as of saturday morning, Nick and I are an offical couple :) oh yes! *sigh* this guy is amazing... what sucks is that with the semester ending, I won't see him for a few weeks... the next weekend I'm going to be able to request off is the one right after new years. *sigh* so 4 weeks... but it's gonna be good, it'll keep this new and exciting. We're gonna try to meet up in syracuse a couple nights for dinner since it's only an hour drive for both of us. And, he's starting his apartment hunting in binghamton so we'll get some wonderful alone time there :) plus, now I can get him something for his apartment for his christmas present... the only thing is, I have NO idea what he needs *sigh* alright that's enough for now.... and as a lil bonus, here's a picture of Nick and I :)
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| woah... |
[08 Dec 2005|04:26pm] |
oh jeeze.. it's been forever since I updated! alright... so what's new...
TONS!!
okay, for starters... I have been so incredibly fantastic lately, I am seriously the happiest I have been in so long. School is going great- can't say anything bad! I f'in LOVE my roommate! My friends are more than a girl could ask for... they are always there, no matter what and they always know how to make someone laugh until her sides hurt! My family is the greatest- even my brothers and I have been getting along amazingly! AND Christmas is coming up!
and...
I met the most wonderful guy... his name's Nick and he's 26 and he's just an all around amazing guy. When I'm around him I get butterflies like whoa, my body tingles all the way down to my toes... it's seriously like a dream. The only downside is that he works for a contracting agency in binghamton and is currently working on a project in brooklyn. So I only get to see him on the weekends, which actually works to our advantage because now I have time during the week for work and my friends, and then weekends, it's just us! Actually... the reason I'm even updating is to waste some time before he comes over. Tomorrow is his work's Holiday Party in Binghamton and I'm his date! I get to be all dressed up and looking hot and he's getting a new suit... so we'll be looking snazzy! So he took tomorrow off to get things ready for the party so he's back in town tonight to spend time with me :)
but enough about Nick... Christmas is almost here! I am so so so excited! My brothers and I are getting the most wonderful present for my parents- I'd post that but they might be reading this... sneaky mother! :) but anyways, I am expecting an awesome christmas, the best presents! And! Nick is getting me an ipod... oh what a turd he is! They are like 300 dollars and we're not offically dating yet, just seeing eachother... *le sigh* but a girl can't complain! I made him a super cute coupon book and got a bear that says "thinking of you from Keuka College: I can bearly study!" It's adorable! I know, it's cheesy.... but this girl is broke and that's all I could do! I'm gonna work on buying him something over break and then give it to him when I come up to visit sometime. No idea what to get... he's the kind of person that'll just go out and buy what he needs. So I don't know... any suggestions??
Alright, I think that's a good enough of an update for now! I'll TRY to keep on top of this and keep you guys posted on Nick and I :)
oh! and I've decided to go back to the whole public journal but I'm gonna keep that cute picture up in case I change my mind ;)
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[19 Apr 2005|04:27pm] |
This journal is now friends only...
Please comment if you wish to be added...
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