Shadows on the Wall: Mission Not-Quite-Possible
[Scene: C-ko, who still dressed in the skintight bodysuit with the boots, scarf, and fedora, is now wearing a trenchcoat over it all. She is leaning casually against an old-fashioned lamp-post in what looks like some sort of public park. A few pigeons peck at the ground a short ways away, and an empty bench stands next to a fountain a little ways off. Gir chases the pigeons, which are fat and lazy and only take off for a few moments before landing to peck at the pavement again.]

C-ko: [with her hat pulled down over her eyes, waits patiently. In the distance, a clock strikes seven; she glances down at her wrist and looks tense. The "camera" pulls in close to her as she looks in the direction of the fountain and saunters casually in that direction, finally sitting down on the very end of the bench. A silence ensues.]

Gir: [still chasing pigeons] Hey, hey! I can fly too! [He takes off in a short burst of rocket flame, circling the fountain after a very flustered pigeon. He passes the pigeon, zips around the fountain three times, then somersaults into a little tree.]

C-ko: [watching Gir gravely] It's really something what the city has come to, these days. [With the peculiar emphasis of someone giving a code-word] Why, it's like a zoo out here.

Voice From the Other End of the Bench: Yes, it seems like everyone's up to some sort of monkey tricks.

C-ko: Things are getting stranger and stranger. Why, people are keeping llamas as pets nowadays!

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: Yes, even though they spit in your face.

C-ko: It's easier to keep smaller pets in the city. I'm partial to parrots myself.

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: But you have to take care of those from the time they crack the eggshell.

C-ko: [lowering her voice] All right, I've got the information.

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: [also lowering "his" voice] Excellent. Hand it over.

C-ko: [plunges a hand into her coat and pulls out a sheaf of papers, handing it offscreen] It's all here.

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: Hmmmmm. [sound of rustling papers] What?!?!?! [voice is hastily lowered] You idiot--!

C-ko: What are you talking about?

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: We needed information on the dictator's war PLANS, not his war-DROBE!!!

C-ko: Well, it's really pretty close, don't you think?

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: It's not the same thing at all!

C-ko: Look, I managed to figure out who you wanted information on, when you wanted it delivered, and even what the codewords were! I think that's pretty damn good!

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: But we gave you explicit instructions!

C-ko: Nuh-uh. It got lost in transmission, and you guys don't take it well when I ask for clarification, and besides, you never gave me a phone number to call back on, so I just made it up as I went along.

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: [horrified silence]

C-ko: Look, shouldn't I just go back and get the information you need? It will only take a day or so. If I can get in and out of his closet, I can surely get in and out of his cabinet.

Voice from the Other End of the Bench: Certainly not. Monkey's Paw, you are fired. [Sounds of someone getting up and marching off.]

C-ko: [reaches over and picks up the sheaf of papers and flicks through them] All that work for nothing. Gir!

Gir: [scurries up to the bench C-ko is sitting on] Yes, Monkey?

C-ko: Destroy these, please. [hands sheaf of papers to Gir.]

Gir: Yes, sir! [Eats the sheaf of papers.] Mmmmmmm! Marshmallow-flavored!

C-ko: I guess it's time for a career change.

Gir: I know! You can be an alien!

C-ko: Gir?

Gir: Yes?

C-ko: I already am.