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[Sep. 29th, 2008|09:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | new york | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | intervention | ] |
i'm having chest pains............
i did a lot of adderall today and just in general lately
i've been warned not to do any uppers, at all....
what should i do?
i've already taken benzos
any other suggestions? |
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[Sep. 19th, 2008|11:53 am] |
Hi, I'm kat, below is an outdated picture of me, I live in Salt lake city Utah and was wondering if anyone else in or around utah likes them some glass...?
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[Sep. 19th, 2008|12:15 am] |
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is anyone here from colorado?
i just moved back out here and don't know a damn person... |
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| Surprise as scientists rate the harm potential of rec. drugs |
[Aug. 27th, 2008|02:25 am] |
.svg/380px-Rational_scale_to_assess_the_harm_of_drugs_(mean_physical_harm_and_mean_dependence).svg.png)
This is from a Wikipedia article on drug addiction. It represents the perceived physical harm potential of drugs according to a survey of medical scientists.
Note how amphetamine is rated as only slightly higher in perceived dangerousness than cannabis.
Standard Common-sense Disclaimer: I have no idea how accurate this is, it's fucking Wikipedia. You might want to have a look and verify its sources if you send this info to anyone you know.
That said, IMHO this chart seems fairly accurate when compared to my own observations and experience.
Also note that this is not a TOXICITY scale. Heroin is not a very toxic drug, but it is still rated as the most dangerous one because of the extremity of the disabling sickness when you're in withdrawal from it. When you withdraw from speed you get tired and grouchy for a few days or a week, but your cells still know what to do, whether you're speeding or quitting.
Before I got on methadone I was a junkie myself (from 1990 to 1992) and I found myself at that time to be on a far too familiar basis with heroin withdrawal: it causes an acute and horrible breakdown of all processes, physical and mental.
EDIT: Okay I'm officially tweaked because I just now noticed that there are TWO scales here - one for harmfulness and one for dependence. That totally screwed with my head.
Now it seems a bit more in line with popular beliefs about drugs...with speed rating fairly high on he former and lower on the latter.
It makes me mad that thanks to the misguided insistence that drugs must be kept illegal at all costs, a substance like speed is kept in a dangerously UNREGULATED market that does not allow more than a limited amount of anything that could be called a healthy experience of it. We can't be assured that the stuff we might ingest is what we intended to take, or even if it is actually amphetamine.
Because, you know, that is "Just WRONG!" and so we need to be PROTECTED from ourselves and doing what we want...
And if we complain about that, we are told to STFU because we are "Drug Addicts", so we OBVIOUSLY simply couldn't have anything remotely valid to say about the matter, right?! This belongs in a sewer, it isn't even supposed to be INSIDE~!
Thanks to "the Drug War" (everything</a> has to be a WAR in America, of course, because people need to be excited about it and the only way to get Americans to pay attention to anything is with lots and lots of violence, sex, and the lurid combining of those things.)
Drugs are basically permanently turned into an expensive luxury most can ill afford...but yet still often continue buying anyway, because of the way a good high can just shunt pain or boredom to the back of your mind. And depending on what got taken: it'll be behind dreaminess, or a sensation of power, or a fascinating hallucination. |
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| new here, sup |
[Aug. 25th, 2008|07:04 am] |
just a lil bit about me, atleast the 'me' i am at the moment....
im goin thru shit, with my antidepressnt drugs, atleast thats what im hoping is the cause.
usually i smoke dope to function, been doin it for 20 yrs. when im out of shit, i take my meds,...lol, but it works, or did work...?
well, if you care about me whinning, peep my journals, but here, imma keep it topic.
speed is my worst friend, and my best freind, and my only friend.
be that what it may, it's the only thing that's remained consistant in my life.
i am getting old. the people my age, are fuckin nuts. i party alone. pretending noone knows. maybe they dont.
dont care.
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[Aug. 23rd, 2008|04:01 pm] |
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| One of those days |
[Aug. 14th, 2008|12:03 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  irritated | ] |
I pretty much had an emotional breakdown a couple of days ago, then to top it off, Madison is going through one of those "hate mom, love everyone else" stages and then I got sick today....horribly sick, stomach pain....shakes, the whole 9 yards.
I pretty much felt like kicking someone in the face. Or getting really fucking high and saying FUCK IT ALL. These cravings are insanely intense sometimes.
uuuugggghhhhhh |
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| Back again |
[Aug. 4th, 2008|03:57 am] |
So in case you didn't, you can see my previous post if you just scroll down on the page.
Well, It was about how badly I just wanted to roll a bowl.
Just a little update: I just had one of the best weekends.
It started out all regular, but then I went to pick up a friend and things went in an unexpected (but not unwelcome) direction.
We rolled some bowls, ran around on some errands, then I went home and "meditated" as to not cause suspicion with the rents.
The next day (early in the morning) I went back to their house, picked them up, and we got some more shit.
We spent the whole day just smoking, working on their car, we went swimming at the river, had a few beers, you know.
Then I went home and read a 756 page book in less than 10 hours.
That was about my weekend.
The whole point of it was... It was probably one of the best highs I've ever had.
That shit was screaming |
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[Aug. 2nd, 2008|07:08 pm] |
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anyone here ever use a needle exhange program? any personal experiances you could give me would be appreciated. |
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| hello.... |
[Jul. 23rd, 2008|10:50 pm] |
Hi. Im Ashley. Im 19. I have a 5 month old daughter. Ive used tar, crystal, various pills, coke, weed and shrooms. Ive been clean a little over a year.
I just stumbled upon this community and was quite thrilled.
I had an unexpected pregnancy, and of course, thinking of her more than I....I quit everything. But I have found that the cravings have come back quite strongly at times. When I was using, I liked meth more than anything. But ive found that now, all I can think about is tar.
Anyhow. I just wanted to introduce myself and share. I have not gotten in contact with anyone from my using days, but I need some people to talk to who know what the fuck is going on with me. NO one in my life right now understands. And when I try to talk to them about it, they freak out and think im using and try to give me big long life speeches.
annoying. |
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| hellp |
[Jul. 7th, 2008|10:02 am] |
I would love to endure into some fucking shit right now.
ugh...
its been a while. |
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| new to this community |
[Jul. 5th, 2008|05:09 am] |
I want to roll a bowl so bad that I've resorted to finding communities of people in the same position.
my body is screaming for some shit. |
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[May. 30th, 2008|03:11 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
I am LOSING MY MIND right now.
I want some blow so bad
[Unknown LJ tag]I was at the bar with the guys and they were talking about throwing down. I said no. My dad will be here at 10am to move out the stuff I packed up. PLUS I have a ton more stuff left to pack tomorrow. I can't be strung out for that. My dad is the kind of person that would know and call me out.
I am so mad right now
I can't fucking sleep. I am anxious, jittery, pissed, sweaty. what the hell? I feel like I am having a fight with myself. It is 3am now and I am still awake, too late to do a line now and still sleep. On one hand I am so mad that I didnt just give in and do a line at 1am when they got it. Maybe then I could have drank some beer and still have gone to bed. But in the same token, I probably would have gotten the hunger, thrown in some dough and stayed up all night.
Let's be honest
After the first line, the good judgment goes right out the window
How many times have I promised myself it would be just one line?
It's just a fake promise that I make to myself so that I wont feel bad about doing it. Once I get hyped up then I don't feel bad about doing a fucking whole gram to myself.
I shouldn't even be up right now. I feel like if I was going to be up all night then I should have just done the blow. At least then I would feel amazing right now.
I think I am also a little strung out from the diet pills
fucking junkie
Fuck me
Fuck me
FUCK ME
Bill just texted me and told me that the shit is GREAT
Great timing fucker
I wish I still had a pain pill left to sniff. That would chill me out a little. I am drinking beer right now. It is not doing the job.
shit
wish me luck. If Bill texts me back in walking across the street to make it a long night</lj> |
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| strike a match |
[Apr. 1st, 2008|04:27 am] |
which do you prefer red or anhydrous?
Maybe it's just the connection, but seriously shit out in the southwest is weaker then grandma trying to cook a new recipe |
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| Just Joined |
[Jan. 21st, 2008|06:14 pm] |
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Hey, I just stumbled across this community and I was reading through some of the posts. I hope this post isnt too off topic since its more about this community than the topic of this community. I'm wondering if any of you have any thoughts about forums like this related to your personal internet security. When it comes to drugs, I've always been somewhat paranoid about online, cellphone, and instant messaging forms of communication, but after a recent talk I had with a friend of mine who is a postdoctoral computer science researcher at my university I'm way more paranoid about it. I always thought this guy was just uber-paranoid about cellphones (every time I talked to him on the phone, the second I mentioned anything even remotely illicit he'd pretend like he didn't understand and hang up) but then he explained to me exactly how and why these forms of communication are so dangerous (and trust me, he's no conspiracty theorist). I'm not trying to put down this community (I'd participate in it differently if I werent worried for security reasons). But just thought I'd share some precautionary safety information and some of my personal experience with online communication issues.
Personal Anecdote: Years ago when I was naive and in highschool I was nearly arrested when my "private" IM conversations were somehow retrieved and handed in to the local police (for some pretty explicit communications about a cocaine deal). Not only was I called in, questioned, essentially blackmailed for information, but so was the person I was talking to. The one other person mentioned in the conversation had to change his cell phone number and start driving a different car to avoid being stalked. All this over an IM conversation.
I'm not trying to tell you to be paranoid or smash your computer and cell phone or anything like that, I'm just wondering if you guys ever worry about things you post here or anywhere else (since your LJ is linked to your email, and email is apprently as public as anything printed on your shirt), I just am wondering if any of you ever worry about anything you've posted online, or if you have ever run into legal issues because of online communications. |
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| ***xXxXxxXX*** |
[Jan. 10th, 2008|05:47 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | new york | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  uncomfortable | ] |
| [ | music |
| | VH1-The Drug Years | ] |
i don't know if anyone cares but right now on VH1 is "The Drug Years" its a great show, very *triggering*
xoxo
crystal |
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| Thank You |
[Jan. 9th, 2008|03:29 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | New York | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | scared | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Deftones | ] |
Thank you everyone for your advice, please keep it coming if you can- if i don't respond its only because i am freaking out in my own head. I may go into the ER- Things don't seem to be getting any better.
Have a Blessed Night
xoxo
Crystal |
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| XXXXXXXxxXxXxxXx |
[Jan. 9th, 2008|01:37 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | new york | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Wolfsheim | ] |
just a question: what do you do when you've taken too many "uppers" (of any kind) and your chest hurts and your heart is racing and (at least i) start freaking out, almost throwing myself into a panic attack which can cause seizures with me. is there anything i can do or take to calm down a bit? i took a klonopin but its not helping. Thanks
Crystal
xoxo |
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[Jan. 6th, 2008|03:31 pm] |
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anyone else here ever get cotton fever? i just got over it. and let me tell you, it fucking SUCKS. |
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