Hello,

I've been a lurker for a while and just decided to join the group to post something. I come to you from Fanfiction.net. You're excited, right? Anyway, I tend to read stories on there (often jump between fandoms) but I've kept in touch with one writer from the Naruto fandom, buttons413. http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1030109/buttons413

She wrote a Naruto story two years ago and is working on revisions. She's told me that she considers the character a Mary Sue and hates how she wrote it, but keeps it up in the hope that someone will critique it. Unfortunately for the girl, she's scared to come forth and ask for it to be sporked or ridiculed for some weird reason (I think she's just very ashamed of it and respects sporking-like communities). So, I offered to use her account---as I am---and post a request for her.

Her story is called "Iris." There are several things that are wrong, but she's hoping someone could give her pointers on what she should focus on. She's working on original stories (and a Newsies fanfic) and she wants people to point out what she's doing wrong (characterization, originality, description) so she can use the knowledge in the future.

It's a long story so no one is expected to comment, or even read, it all. There are two sequels. If someone wants to, those can be sporked since they're shorter (one is a oneshot and the other is four chapters, I believe). If a person just wants to read the sequels and wants to understand the concept then feel free to ask. =)

Thank you for your time,

Sally =D

Representative of Shyshi


Iris: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3027048/1/Iris

Summary: A high end private school has been closed temporarily because of a fire. Now the high and mighty students must go to a public school in a shifty neighborhood where Naruto and his friends await them. Rated for safety. SasuxOC

( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )

Ok, so I found a Quizilla user that has some pretty good fanfics.
Although nearly all the characters she uses are Mary-Sues, I think they're well-written and stuff. (Also, check out the 2 Mary Sue parodies under One-Shots!)

http://www.quizilla.com/users/Serendepity/quizzes/ 
 

So I'm a lurker on here, but a big poster on Naruto Horrors.

I was searching for my favorite Naruto yuri fic (Naruto Yuri Unleased. It's a pretty good antidote if you're like 18+) and this shitfic, Team 13 popped up. The Sasuke-faggirl's name is Yuri. I LOL'D.

Since I don't know how to put my MiST directly here without stretching the page, the link to my MiST is here. *BONUS! I MiSTed some of the reviews!*

http://rip-silver.livejournal.com/6159.html 

I don't think I require any further explanation when I mention 'Naruto fan-fiction' and 'Quizilla!' in one sentence.
The culprit in question is 'SolitaryMaiden' who can't fucking write and she'll send her band of retards after you if you 'dare' to flame her.

All the more reason for me to do some stabbety-stabbing up her ass by sporking: The Pain Hidden In The Scars

------

I found a plagiarist in the GaaSaku section of our fandom. She's definitely already hit my work. However, I read over her fic and noticed that her style & narrative voice varied wildly between the first two chapters and the last.

yrbanys confirmed my suspicions last night--yes, this author had stolen chunks of someone else's work for her third chapter. But due to some browser screwups and ff.net eating links, we can't relocate the author to alert them.


So this goes out to you google-savvy people, or you GaaSaku 'shippers who know your authors . . . Does anyone have any idea who else this kid's ripped off here?

Yikes. This place is getting rather dusty. I'm starting to fear that some of you may have been lost to the vicious riptide of badfic.

Anywho. Antidotes. Two of which are by the same authoress

Title: Sundried Palaver
Authoress' Name: firefly
Brief Summary: It was incredibly rare to find a person so pathetic and deprived of love and affection that they’d turn to someone like him for comfort. Love, Zetsu realized, and humanity’s selfish desire for it, had bestowed him with a sense of normalcy.
Why It's Awesome: Because fandom rarely spares a minute on Zetsu. Ever. Ever ever. And the authoress gives him just the due credit and attention he deserves. He's given so many plausible quirks, beliefs and codes of conduct that they're practically canon-considerable. Also, the setting is laid out and described to such an exceptional extent where the reader could instantly envision it with no inhibitions. By the time you're finished reading, you'll want to go outside and hug a tree. Firefly is a particularly gifted authoress who needs oodles more credit than she currently gets. At least, in my opinion.
Rating: 5/5

Title: The Witching Hour
Authoress' Name: firefly
Brief Summary: Uchiha Sasuke, the fearless leader of Team Hebi, finds himself in over his head when he and his team stumble upon an abandoned, bizarre little inn in the middle of a nameless forest. Crackfic.
Why It's Awesome: Before I begin my kiss-assery concerning this fic, I should warn all of you not caught up with the manga that you'll have a hard time understanding who's who, since this fic features recently introduced characters.

This is, without a doubt, THE quintessential Team Hebi fic (not to mention the most Scooby Doo-esque). The flow and plot of the whole story instantly hooks you in, and once again the authoress works her magic with bestowing the characters with believable quirks. (Juugo was never a ninja, but a baker's apprentice before he went to Orochimaru; Suigetsu sleepwalks; etc...). The utter ridiculousness of the shenanigans that Team Hebi (more specifically, Sasuke) gets into is nothing short of hysterical. And the ending will make you smile. Or your money back.

Hell, just visit her profile if you have time to kill and read any and all of her crackfics. You shant regret it, though your split sides might.
Rating: 5/5

Title: Marrow
Authoress' Name: DeGlace
Brief Summary: Kimimaro x Sakura. Because some things reach bone–deep.
Why It's Awesome: Before you make funny faces at the crack-pairing, just try to count how many fics just FEATURING Kimimaro you've ever come across. That's what I thought. Anywho, the authoress' depiction of Kimimaro is so disgustingly adorable it'll make your teeth rot. He's not so much stoic but more socially-inept-but-learning. The romance that progresses between himself and Sakura is delivered very smoothly to the point of it being overly natural. And Sakura's denial of any emotional attachment to her patient gets rather amusing as the fic goes on (like blaming it on Stockholm Syndrome). Not to mention DeGlace does a rather applaudable job of bull-shitting her way through medical terminology.
Rating: 5/5

Have fun, kiddies.

Title: Itachi and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Rating: T
Genre: Action / Adventure
Summary: Just before that fateful time where Itachi slaughters his clan, he receives a mission to guard one Harry Potter for a single year. How much can change for Itachi, Harry, and the History of both worlds, in just one year?
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3153311/1/
( Pros and Cons of the Story + Commentary )

Story Title: Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond
Offender/Author's Name: BloomOfYOUTH
Brief Summary/Violations List: PLAGIARISM.
Brief excerpt, Not-so-brief excerpt, MST, etc.: "Alright, I found this on my computer and I remembered I made it when I was 14. That was the first time I saw Deidara, too! My recent work isn't as good because I remeber falling asleep in class because I worked until like three-thirty in the morning. Yup, good old memories. Now my work is rushed. *tears* I WILL WORK HARD ON MY OTHER STORIES! I PROMISE! LIKE WHEN I WAS FOURTEEN, I WILL WORK TO MAKE PERFECTION! But then again, it would take quite a while. Yeah, but you guys can wait! Right?

[Of course, my fourteen year old self wasn't THAT good at writing, now matter how long it took! I had some help from my older sister. So I give some credit to her.]"

Please go play in traffic, you dirty liar.

Rating: 5/5. I have absolutely no tolerance for plagiarism.

Story Title: Sakura's Love Life
Offender/Author's Name: KiMiST3Rz93
Brief Summary/Violations List: Use of the word "CHAPPiE" in reference to chapter, the hideous melding of the highschool AU with canon to make some sort of mutant child that has ninja's going to an Americanized highschool, random capitalization, character rape, tweeny mind set and thought process, and the belief that random events lasting a few lines and strung together will make a fic. Also, the religion thing? Die plz.
Brief excerpt, Not-so-brief excerpt, MST, etc.:

( Got earplugs handy? )
Rating: I recomend the full 5 for this one, and a few sporks through the eyes for good measure.

Title: You really are insane (*snort*)
Offender's name:: Yaso no Shirabe Demikkusu
Violations list: SuicidalEmo!Gaara (Oh earth, why?!), Kankuro respecting his brother's wishes to die (-tears hair out-), Pedobait!Temari, Yashamaru and Gaara's dad are randomly alive and... random, badly placed in modern world fic not to mention defiling Gaara's past and character into some teenage wangst. Let's not forget about shitty grammar and abuse of the enter and period keys.
Summary: Gaara thinks that he isn't wanted by anyone so he tries to get rid of himself so he won't be such a burden. Okay some sakuraxgaara but this is not a romance fic! chap 13 working on!
Rating:: 4/5 headdesks and Reyairia's new coffin.

( Someone please put me out of my misery! )

Hello Hello~ Long time lurker, first time poster. ^^;

I'm making a mini-comic called "Tanuki of the Sand 101", it points out the many things SueAuthors do WRONG when typing Gaara into their story. From things like misspelling his demon's name, magically placing him into team 7, rapage of character, common sues used when paired with Gaara, etc. Basically humor with a point behind it.

The thing is, I think I'm missing a bunch of points, so I'm asking all of you what do you constantly see in BAD Gaara-based fics. It can be of his siblings as well. Hell, anything Hidden Sand related.

Give me all you got!

][ Also, I am doing a "Naruto 101" mini-comic later on. Might as well get started on the points on that too? For all the things SueAuthors do WRONG with the Naruto-universe: from the 90 jillion sister sues to Ipods in Hidden Mist. ][

Story Title: ROOKIE 9'S CHILDREN
Offender/Author's Name: gaaragirl21
Brief Summary/Violations List: Reuse of cliches from the anime, boring enough to induce a coma, OC characters that are more clones than children, horrendous lack of personality in any character, and a notable lack of spell check.
Brief excerpt, Not-so-brief excerpt, MST, etc.:


( In the land of Kohona... )

Rating: Three out of five for the mind numbing reuse of everything in the series.

Story Title: A Justifiable Excuse
Author's Name:  rayemars
Brief Summary: Uchiha Itachi, there is no sin in killing your clan when they are only imposters.
Why It's Awesome:  For the people who would like to believe that Itachi's not just an insane pyschopath, this is the fic for you.  It's actually plausible.  Not to mention that this author just happens to be one of the best I've come across in a long while; they show more than they tell.  The story just has a wonderful flow and you almost feel sorry for Itachi at the end.

Story Title:  Deflowering the Flower

Offender/Author's Name: destiny's sweet melody (that would be Paris Hilton singing....)

Brief Summary/ Violations List: OOC!Hinata (perhaps a little on Ino, Sakura, and Tenten too),Naruto can be hired to deflower girls ( ;_: *eyes bleeding* ), technology that's not even supposed to be in the Naruto verse (Sakura has a laptop, some OC has an iPod) and Appearance!Sasuke.

Brief/Not-so-brief excerpt:

“Calling your and sasuke-kun’s middle man to find out who the new kid is, huh, Hina-chan?” Sakura asked. She was the only one who noticed Hinata’s staring. ‘Cause she wasn’t gossiping so much since she was on her laptop.

“Good idea Hina-chan,” Ino said, “I’ve been wondering too. I have him for Science class.”

“We know we’re in that class too.” Usagi said, finally taking off her head phones. Kiba finally reached their table. (A/N: Doesn’t he like to take his sweet time in my story? LOL)

“What’s up girls?” Kiba asked.

“Hina-chan wants to know about the new kid.” Tenten replied getting straight to the point.

Rating: 3.5/5 headdesks.