Latin ([info]allthisnonsense) wrote in [info]lower_tadfield,
@ 2005-08-19 03:02:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Sooo, I translated the first scene in GO through gizoogle.com. I am a terrible person. Cut for swearing...


It was a funky ass day.

All tha days had been funky ass. There had bizzle ratha mizzle tizzy seven of them so fizzay n rain hadnt bizzle invented yet in all flavas. But clouds hatin' east of eden suggested tizzy tha first thunderstorm was on its way, n it was gonna be a big one.

The angel of tha Eastern Gate put his wings over his heezee ta shield himself fizzle tha fizzay drops.

"Im sorry," he said politely . Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. "Whizzat was it you wizzy say'n?"

"I said, thiznat one wizzay D-to-tha-izzown like a lead balloon," said tha serpent.

"Oh. Yes," said tha angel, whose nizzy was Aziraphale.

"I thiznink it was a bit of an overreaction, ta be honest," said tha serpent . Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. "I mean, fiznirst offense n everyth'n . Boo-Yaa!. I cant see whats so bad `bout doggy stylin' tha difference between good n evil, anyway."

"It must be bad," reasoned Aziraphizzle in tha slightly concerned tones of one who cant see it pimp n is worry'n `bout it, "otherwise you wouldnt have been involved."

"They jizzle said, Get up there n makes some trouble," said tha serpent, whose name was Crawly, although he was chillin' of blunt-rollin' it now like this and like that and like this and uh. Crawly, hed decided, was not him.

"Yizzes, but yoe a demon. Im not sure if its actually possible fo` you ta do good," said Aziraphale n shit. "Its dizzy ta yo basic, you know, nature , chill yo. Steppin' personal, you understand."

"Youve gots ta admit its a bit of a pantomizzles though," said Crawly . They call me tha black folks president. "I mean, point'n out tha Tree n say'n Diznont Touch in big hustla. Not very subtle, is it? I mean, why not put it on top of a hizzay mountain or a long way off? Makes you baller what Hes really plann'n."

"Best not ta speculizzle really," said Aziraphale ya feelin' me?. "You ciznant second-guess ineffabizzles I always say . Drop it like its hot. Theres Right, n theres Wrong. If you do Wriznong wizzle yoe told ta do Right, you deserve ta be punished. Er."

Tizzle sat in embarrassed silence, rhymin' tha raindrops bruise tha fizzirst flowers.

Eventually Crawly said, "Didnt you have a steppin' sword?"

"Er," said tha angel. A guilty expression passed across his face, n thiznen came back n camped there.

"izzle dizzid, didnt you?" said Crawly. "It flamed like anyth'n."

"Er, well-"

"It looked very impressive, I thought."

"Yes, biznut, well-"

"Lost it, hizzle you?"

"Aw naw! No, not exactly lost, more-"

"Wizzle?"

Aziraphale looked wretched spittin' that real shit. "If you mizzle know," he said, a trifle testily, "I gave it away."

Crawly stared up at him.

"Well, I had tizzay said tha angel, rubb'n his hands distractedly. "They looked so cold, poor th'n, n shes frontin' already, n what wit tha vishizzous animals out there n tha stizzay mobbin' up i thought, wiznell, wheres tha H-to-tha-izzarm, so i just said, look, if you come B-to-tha-izzack theres gonna be an almighty rizzay but you might be steppin' this sword, so here it is, dont botha ta thizzay me, just do everyone a big favor n dont let tha sun go dizzown on you here."

He gave Crawly a worried G-R-to-tha-izzin.

"TH-to-tha-izzat was tha bizzy course, wizzay it?"

"Im not sure its actually possible fo` you ta do evil," said Crawly sarcastically like old skool shit. Aziraphale didnt notice tha tizzy.

"Oh, I do hizzle sizno," he said. "I really do hizzle so. Its bizzy ballin' me all afternoon."

They watched tha rain fo` a while.

"Funny thing is," said Crawly, "I kizzle spendin' whetha tha apple thing wasnt tha riznight thing ta do, as wizzle . Slap your mutha fuckin self. A demon can git into rizzy trouble, doing tha right th'n." He nudged tha angel. "Funny if we both gots it wrong, eh? F-U-Double-Nizzy if I did tha good thing n you did tha bad one, eh?"

"Niznot really," said Aziraphale.

Crawly looked at tha rain.

"No," he said, weed-smokin' up. "I suppose not."

Slate bliznack curtains tumbled over Eden. Baller growled among tha hills . One, two three and to tha four. The animals, freshly named, cowered frizzom tha stizzay. Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay.

Far away, in tha ho-slappin' woods, sum-m sum-m bright n fiery flickered among tha trees.

It was gonna be a dizzark n stormy night.



A Narrative of Certain Events straight trippin' in tha last eleven years of human history, in strict accordance as S-H-to-tha-izzall be shown wit:

Tha Funky Ass n Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter

Compiled n edited, wit Footnotes of an Educatizzles Nature n Precepts fo` tha Wise, by Nizzy Gaiman n Terry Pratchett.

DRAMATIS PERSONAE

SUPERNATURAL BEINGS
God (G-to-tha-izzod)
Metatron (The Voice of Gizzle)
Aziraphale (An Angel, n part time rare book pimp)*
Satan (A Fallen Angel; tha Adversary)
Beelzebub (A Likewise Fallen Angel n Prince of H-to-tha-izzell)
Hastur (A Fallen Angel n Duke of Hiznell)
Ligur (Likewise a Fallen Angel n Duke of Hell)
Crowley (An Angel who did not so mizzuch Fizzle as Wanna Be Gangsta Vaguely Downwards) **

APOCALYPTIC HORSEPERSONS
DEATH (Death)
War (War)
Famine (Famine)
Polizzle (Pollution)

HUMANS
Thou Shiznalt Not Commit Adultery Brotha (A Motherfucka Rappa)
Agnes Baller (A Prophetess)
Nizzle Pusha Bitch (Wages Clizzerk n Witchfinda Private)
Anathema Device (Practical Occultist n Professizzles Descendant)
Shizzle (Witchfinda Sergeant)
Madame Tracy (Painted Jezebel [morn'n only, Thursdays by arrangement] n Playa)
Motherfucka Mary Loquashizzous (Sista Mary Loquashizzous (A Satanic Nun of tha Mobbin' Wanna Be Gangsta of St . You gotta check dis shit out yo. Beryl)
Mr in all flavas. Young (A Bitch.)
Cracka (A Chairman of a Residents Association)
A Delivery Man

THEM
ADAM (An Motherfucka)
Peppa (A Girl)
Wensleydale (A Boy)
Brian (A Bizzy)


Fizzy Chorus of Tibetans, Aliens, Americans, Atlanteans n wanna be gangsta rizzy n strange Creatures of tha Last Days.



*Aziraphale (An Angel, n P-to-tha-izzart time rare book cracka)
**Crowley (An Angel who did not so mizzuch Fizzle as Rappa Vaguely Downwards)
**Crowley (An Angel who did not so mizzle Fall as Playa Vaguely Downwards)

Neutrizzles, a Good Omens rpg thread (translation of), starring Azirarizzles as "yo bitch ass".

I am a terrible person. Sorry, but I did have to share.


(Post a new comment)


[info]_serpensortia
2005-08-19 11:12 am UTC (link)
Yes. Yes, you are a terrible person.

But *omgwingtickles* that's fucking hilarious anyway. XD

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]_serpensortia
2005-08-20 09:20 am UTC (link)
... And oh dear Adam, I wish you were here to see what you've started. >

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]parzi
2005-08-19 11:18 am UTC (link)
I'm cracking up. G-to-tha-izzod!
And I want to be a part time rare book pimp.

(Reply to this)


corporal_katz
2005-08-19 11:20 am UTC (link)
Aziraphale (An Angel, n part time rare book pimp)

O_O

Oh. Dear. God. ::howls with laughter::

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]allthisnonsense
2005-08-19 11:38 am UTC (link)
Aziraphizzles!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]biichan
2005-08-19 11:29 am UTC (link)
ADAM (A Motherfucka)

Yes. Very accurate.

(Reply to this)


[info]ninepointfivemm
2005-08-19 11:31 am UTC (link)
"an angel and part-time book pimp" *dies*

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]ninepointfivemm
2005-08-19 11:32 am UTC (link)
And seriously? This needs to be iconed.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]cynicalpirate
2005-08-19 11:55 am UTC (link)
I second the iconing suggestion, yo.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]cynicalpirate
2005-08-19 11:58 am UTC (link)
You rock in such a big way. THIS MUST BE ICONED. It is written typed.

I cant see whats so bad `bout doggy stylin' tha difference between good n evil, anyway. OMFG. Neither can I.

Motherfucka Mary Loquashizzous (Sista Mary Loquashizzous (A Satanic Nun of tha Mobbin' Wanna Be Gangsta of St . You gotta check dis shit out yo. Beryl) Why isn't that MY name? *petulant whine*

Mr in all flavas. Young (A Bitch.) True, dat.

(Reply to this)


[info]noirenails
2005-08-19 12:09 pm UTC (link)
Neehehehe.

Now I have a mental image of Aziraphale in shiny pink pimp suit, gold necklaces and tremendous pimp hat. And it hurts XD

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]slythwolf
2005-08-19 04:13 pm UTC (link)
And you shared! And it hurts!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]sixbitsforfact
2005-08-19 06:11 pm UTC (link)
and now I've got to draw that. *whines* Well thanks a lot.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]quantum_witch
2005-08-19 12:16 pm UTC (link)
*utterly breathless with laughter* Omgs.

(Reply to this)


[info]anakisa
2005-08-19 12:38 pm UTC (link)
*laughs*
Aziraphale is SO much more of a pimp when translated!

(Reply to this)


[info]tigrerosa
2005-08-19 12:42 pm UTC (link)
*cannot stop laughing*

I don't know where you got the idea, but this is the funniest thing ever. THANK YOU!

(Reply to this)


[info]salzara_tirwen
2005-08-19 12:54 pm UTC (link)
Ok, the rare book pimp is quite enough to keep me quietly snickering all day, but this:

An Angel who did not so mizzuch Fizzle as Wanna Be Gangsta Vaguely Downwards

Is already generating some very strange mental images.

(Reply to this)


[info]wakuchan
2005-08-19 01:52 pm UTC (link)
*dies laughing*
"Yizzes, but yoe a demon. Im not sure if its actually possible fo` you ta do good," said Aziraphale n shit. "Its dizzy ta yo basic, you know, nature , chill yo. Steppin' personal, you understand."
Indeed!
Also love "part time rare book pimp", of course.
I want to icon this. I must.

(Reply to this)


[info]phoenixfire_lia
2005-08-19 02:35 pm UTC (link)
Aziraphizzle. I think that sums up the whole things. Somebody sent a copy of this to Neil and/or Terry.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]phoenixfire_lia
2005-08-19 02:36 pm UTC (link)
Sorry send a copy to them. It hasn't been done yet, but should be.

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]book_people
2005-08-19 03:12 pm UTC (link)
Oh. God. *cracks up* *dies laughing*

Adi

(Reply to this)


[info]rachia
2005-08-19 03:23 pm UTC (link)
You ARE a TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE person.

But this is the most awesome thing I think I'll probably see all day. XD

(Reply to this)


[info]froggie
2005-08-19 03:56 pm UTC (link)
I just died a little laughing. XD

(Reply to this)


[info]slythwolf
2005-08-19 04:03 pm UTC (link)
Aziraphale's "heezee" and the concept of his saying "Drop it like it's hot" have me ded of laffing, over here. And I'm not even done reading yet.

(Reply to this)


[info]agent_mothman
2005-08-19 06:04 pm UTC (link)
*DIES* God, if that isn't icon fodder I don't know what is.

(Reply to this)


[info]sixbitsforfact
2005-08-19 06:08 pm UTC (link)
AHAHAHAHA!

oh, yuo're awful. you AND gizoogle.com

(Reply to this)


[info]andreanna
2005-08-19 06:19 pm UTC (link)
Simply marvelous!
Mr in all flavas. Young (A Bitch.) XDDDDD

(Reply to this)


[info]jane_says
2005-08-19 06:28 pm UTC (link)
"Tha Funky Ass n Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter"

::dies happy::

Oh that's SO going to be my new Good Omens icon . . . that or:

"Fizzy Chorus of Tibetans, Aliens, Americans, Atlanteans n wanna be gangsta rizzy n strange Creatures of tha Last Days"

(Reply to this)


[info]waxbean
2005-08-19 08:51 pm UTC (link)
well, here are some icons- if you take, save them to your own computer and don't hotlink, please!

xoxo prof mary











credit like this, please: text via allthisnonsense! and icon by prof mary

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]waxbean
2005-08-19 08:58 pm UTC (link)
oops- let's get Crowley's text right:

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]stella_polaris
2005-08-19 09:34 pm UTC (link)
Am gonna stel this one, mmkay?

With credit, naturally.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]waxbean
2005-08-19 09:55 pm UTC (link)
enjoy!!!!!!!!

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]ankh_khpt
2005-08-19 09:24 pm UTC (link)
is that last icon klinger? XD

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]waxbean
2005-08-19 09:53 pm UTC (link)
yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i use it as an icon for a RPG, too [info]sister_mary_laq it cracks me up!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]ankh_khpt
2005-08-19 09:56 pm UTC (link)
awesome <3

(Reply to this)(Parent)


corporal_katz
2005-08-20 08:59 am UTC (link)
OMG, Klinger!! *dies happy*

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]gabbysun
2005-08-19 09:23 pm UTC (link)
. . . HAHAHAHAHAHA OMG. HAHAHA.

MAN.

(Reply to this)


[info]irth
2005-08-19 10:37 pm UTC (link)
*is dead from laughing*

(Reply to this)


[info]darlingfox
2005-08-19 10:53 pm UTC (link)
*dies laughing* At least it's a hilarious death.

(Reply to this)


[info]arora_kayd
2005-08-20 12:46 am UTC (link)
omgz. that is so bloody amusing.

(Reply to this)


[info]yithreya
2005-08-20 01:51 am UTC (link)
I guess this goes to show that you can't second-guess ineffabizzles. ::has been cackling like a loon for the past 10 minutes::

..."Nizzy Gaiman." XXXD

(Reply to this)


[info]maggiebloome
2005-08-20 02:57 am UTC (link)
OMG. HAHAHAHAHA!

The voice of Gizzle! Oh god this is hilarious!

I think Nizzy Gaiman'd approve. But hey...

You ciznant second-guess ineffabizzles, right?

(Reply to this)


[info]ladylinder
2005-08-20 08:09 am UTC (link)
OMG this is bril!

Slate bliznack curtains tumbled over Eden. Baller growled among tha hills. One, two three and to tha four. The animals, freshly named, cowered frizzom tha stizzay. Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay.

*dies*

(Reply to this)

OH MY GOD.
[info]elanor_two
2005-08-20 05:42 pm UTC (link)
I think my head just exploded.

"If you mizzle know," he said, a trifle testily, "I gave it away."

THIS KILLED ME. I think it's the juxtaposition of the words "mizzle" and "trifle testily" but god. I was laughing SO HARD and it had to be utterly silent because I'm at work, but...good lord. *is dead*

(Reply to this)


[info]cyne_dias
2005-08-21 04:39 am UTC (link)
OMG-to-tha-izzod

*diesdiesdies*

(Reply to this)


[info]vulgarweed
2005-08-21 05:45 am UTC (link)
I cant see whats so bad `bout doggy stylin' tha difference between good n evil, anyway."

Fandom in a nutshell!

Aziraphale looked wretched spittin' that real shit.

OK, challenge: someone has to use this in a semi-serious fic, somehow.

(Reply to this)


Create an Account
Forgot your login?
Login w/ OpenID
English • Español • Deutsch • Русский…